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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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Start each day with a smile,
Get it over and done with.

It turns out, if you lay out every book in an Asia Books branch,
you get thrown out by security.

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My girlfriend walked out the door and said she was leaving me. So I stole her wheelchair.

Guess who came crawling back ...

The children wanted their Mum to wake up with a smile on her face.
Anyway, long story short, permanent markers are now banned from the house.

Two silkworms had a race – it ended in a tie.

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Had an appointment at the Hospital:
Doctor, “What is this?"
ME, “This is a book that I’ve written, it’s got 500 pages."
Doctor, “You wrote 500 pages. What did you write about then?”
Me, On the first page I wrote “One day a King rode on a Horse and went towards the Jungle.
And on the last page I wrote The King reached the Jungle."
Doctor, “So what did you write in the remaining 498 pages?"
Me, “I wrote,
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik.... tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik. Tigdik
tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik....
Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik.
Tigdik tigdik tigdik
tigdik...
Doctor, (stunned) "AND what's all that????!!!!!"
Me, “That's the sound of the Horse running...The hooves digging the terrain."
Doctor- "AND Who will read your story?"
I will post it on Asean Now.  The idiots there will read anything.

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With the rise of self-driving vehicles,
how long will it be before there's a country song
about how his truck left him too?

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