If the shoe fits

Don't sh!t on your own doorstep. 

Edited July 5, 20233 yr by roo860

1 hour ago, ballpoint said:

Ear Ear!  I think you struck the right notes there!

22 minutes ago, scottiejohn said:

Ear Ear!  I think you struck the right notes there!

Sorry, I missed your reply. I was having my 5th movement of the day.

49 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Sorry, I missed your reply. I was having my 5th movement of the day.

On the subject of movements (too much info IMO)

Have you heard of the leader of the bovine communist movement?
Cow Zedong, better known as Chairman Cow.

Great guy.

Had the most mooving speeches.

Edited July 5, 20233 yr by scottiejohn

Now that we are on the subject of cows!

Why did the cows stop smoking weed
Because it got to the point where the steaks were too high !

Edited July 5, 20233 yr by scottiejohn

Now that we are on the subject of weed!

Caveman discovers weed
Caveman discovers fire

The Stoned age begins
 

Edited July 5, 20233 yr by scottiejohn

Now that we are on the subject of Cavemen!

 

I've decided to teach her to speak;

That can't cause any harm can it?

 

Now that we are on the subject of stupid questions!

At Friday night's services, Morris asks his friend Irving.
"I need a favor, I'm sleeping with the Rabbi's wife. Can you hold him in synagogue for an hour after services for me?"

Irving is not very fond of the idea but being Morris' life-long friend, he reluctantly agrees. After services, he strikes up a conversation with the Rabbi, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. After some time the wise Rabbi becomes suspicious and asks, "Irving what are you really up to?"

Irving, filled with feelings of guilt and remorse confesses to the Rabbi, "I'm sorry, Rabbi. My friend is sleeping with your wife, right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied."

The Rabbi smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Irving's shoulder and says,

 

"You better hurry home, Irving. My wife died two years ago."
 

5 hours ago, roo860 said:

Don't sh!t on your own doorstep. 

The Poms should remember that. :)

2 hours ago, scottiejohn said:

On the subject of movements (too much info IMO)

Have you heard of the leader of the bovine communist movement?
Cow Zedong, better known as Chairman Cow.

Great guy.

Had the most mooving speeches.

Good try. A for Effort. :)

.

1 hour ago, oxo1947 said:

.

But I'm on a crash diet at the moment!

15 hours ago, roo860 said:

Posted the link only, as I'm pretty sure the video would be <deleted>.

If you are under 18, please get permission from an adult before opening the link.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0R_M3K7j3rI&ab_channel=NuttyLoLz

 

7 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

Posted the link only, as I'm pretty sure the video would be <deleted>.

If you are under 18, please get permission from an adult before opening the link.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0R_M3K7j3rI&ab_channel=NuttyLoLz

 

???????????? brilliant, I did ask my mum's permission!!!!