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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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Get the guy a job

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"I don't want to know why you can't. I want to know how you can!"

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My Grandad's answer to everything was alcohol...

He didn't drink, he was just terrible at quizzes.

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ANOTHER MARRIAGE TIP;

 

When your wife is mowing the lawn and you are watching football with a nearly empty beer bottle in hand' that's not the best time to ask her when dinner will be ready.
Best to wait till she has gone to the fridge to get you a replacement beer!

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According to the so called experts you burn as many calories as running 5 miles while making love!
Who the ^&*^ runs 5 miles in 30 seconds?

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Never fight with a Dinosaur.
You'll just get Jurasskicked!

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Did you hear about all the hidden meanings in the Lion King?

Yeah, it’s full of Simbalisms.
 

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Did you hear about the modern sushi restaurant which was taking heat from traditionalists for serving battered, fried tropical eels? 
“O tempura! O moray!”
 

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What do all battered women have in common?

 

They just don't know when to shut the <deleted> up.

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