The Importance Of 'jai Dee'

[GuestHouse]

Whenever I hear those glowing accounts of Thai culture, you know the ones, where everything Thai is painted as being ‘Good and wholesome’, I immediately think ‘for exactly who’s benefit is this being repeated?’

That I would argue is healthy cynicism. Unhealthy negativity (since I’m sure the accusation will arise) would be to deny the whole idea of ‘Goodness and Wholesomeness’ in Thai culture – I’m not about to do that.

But I do think we need to keep in mind ‘Nobody is that good!’.

However, we should also agree that some of these Goodness and Wholesomeness’ things are exactly that, and of benefit.

Take that Phu Yai Jai Dee thing, spreading one’s largesse, doing benefit for the less fortunate, I can go along with some of that. I quite like the idea of being Jai Dee.

But I’m also mindful of some advice I was given by an ‘old hand’ when I first moved to Thailand.

‘Thais’ he said, ‘will often ask you to help them out, do so as you wish, but take my advice, give thgem something, but never give them what they ask for’.

I’ve tried to practice this, and found it to be wisdom I wish to share.

A while back I received an email from a neighbor to our land in Thailand. ‘Please call soon it said’, their phone number followed.

This was a bit odd because while the neighbor has my email address, he and his wife have never ever emailed me. They email my wife.

mmm Curiouser and Curiouser.

So against my better judgment I called (we’ve all done that).

‘Yes I’m well’, ‘Yes my wife is well’, ‘Yes our children are well’, ‘Yes the weather is fine’, ‘Yes my mother who you have never met is fine’

Better get it over with

‘How’s things your end?’

'Oh, erm, erm, erm Nai…..'

The truth was they wanted to borrow some money..... Bht800K of money

The reason why they wanted 800K was "to buy a plot of land on which to park cars that visit their business, but the loan will only be for three of four months and they’ll pay me back in full with interest in three or four months".

mmmm, let me think.

One should always take the oportunity to seem fair and sagelike in one's dealings with Thais. Give yourself time and space to think.

I wrote back last week to confirm my decision. (Keeping in mind that you must always give something, but never what is asked)

I’ve given permission for my neighbour to park cars on our land for three months until he can get the money to buy his new car park.

If they agree they can go along to our lawyers and he'll draft up the paperwork, the fee shall be less than Bht2000.

I've not heard back yet, but I am quite sure that my wisdom has been recognized.

[Ijustwannateach]

!!! Great story and great decision, Guesthouse!!!

[The Dan Sai Kid]

My wife got a call from a school friend telling her that an old teacher was calling around her old students to borrow money. She had told the friend that she had heard The Dan Sai Wife had married a farang and she would be getting called in the next couple of days.

The solution: When the teacher called I answered the phone and spoke only English - even though my Thai converation skills are sort of middling.

After 20 seconds she gave up and hung up - never heard from her again!

[tijnebijn]

Yeah smart,not bad not bad.Borrowing translated in Thai means giving Borrowing is jus to get it,when seeing your face they will avoid you,and take a face like I do not know what you talk about.

Other words,open the wallet and never comes back.So the old wise guy you met lost a big part of his before you could ever.Funny aren't they,those thai folks