Help me figure out my life with my thai GF.

[espanolentailandia]

Hey guys my name is Juan, I am Spanish and I am new here ????

 

I met my thai girlfriend like 2 years ago on a 4-month trip when I came to Thailand thinking about my future. I never planned to get a girlfriend or meet any girls in Thailand because I hate parties and I like to be on my own but well, things happen I guess and that's my situation right now ...

 

I feel so strange and lonely about it because I haven't told any relative nor friend and I feel quite bad with myself for that. 

 

I would like to speak about somebody about my situation as it may help me see it all clearer but I feel like I am so different from all the people around me, and they can't understand me at all ...

 

After chatting every day since we met and seeing in each other at least once a year, right now I am starting to plan our future together and I see 2 options.

 

Option number 1 was that she come to Europe to live with me here but lately I have been thinking about going to Thailand for a while to teach her some Spanish and other abilities she may need for living in Europe. 

 

I feel like I could work online and would be easier for me living in Thailand rather than she learning Spanish and trying to get used to the live in Spain at first.

 

I have been considering the option of taking a Thai course for 6 or 12 months to be next to her and then think about our future.

 

Is there anyone from Spain or Latin America that can tell me if I could work in Bangkok as a freelance Spanish teacher without any title? Should I get any certificate? I know that I can't work officially with student visa but you guys know i can do that and get money in cash ... 

 

I haven't checked a lot how it works but are there any options for me to stay in Thailand if I learn thai? My level of English is quite high as I have lived 2 years in the UK and worked in big finance companies but if I move to Thailand i'd like to start freelancing on something like teaching languages or creating a site and sell my services (i would really get out of my comfort zone but i have some experience creating website which give me like 200€ a month).

 

Can anyone tell me what are the conditions right now for me if I marry a Thai local? Do i need to get a certain income or i can live out of some savings I may have till I get used to or try to get a job? I have around 15.000€ saved but that's all I have.

 

I could get 200 euros with some <deleted>ty affiliate marketing websites I have and when I was in Thailand I would try to keep boosting my online stuff and try to create something more for the long term and not only getting money from <deleted>ty affiliate websites ...

 

Should I trying it guys? For me it would be a bit risky as it would be something quite new for me and it is totally the opposite from what my family and people around me would expect from me to do.

 

I am a bit afraid of taking the step and that's why i'd like to hear your opinion because right now i feel a bit scared and sad i may move to Thailand and everything would go totally as opposite as expected.

 

Sorry for the long one but I needed to write what I felt somewhere and I didn't know where until I found this forum ...

 

Thanks ????

Edited June 1, 2020 by espanolentailandia
change title

[torturedsole]

I'm disappointed with your first OP.  I assumed you were going to dish the dirt on your Thai girlfriend.  

 

Let's start again.  Are you sure you're not having relationship issues?  

 

 

Edited June 1, 2020 by torturedsole

[espanolentailandia]

No she is a really good person and I like her a lot.

 

I don't really understand your answer but I have never pretended to create a troll post or anything like that.

 

I am just trying to get any opinions from people because I believe i can learn a lot from other people's experience.

[kingofthemountain]

And we go again....

Hola amigo como estas?

Well i will be back as soon as i can find this facepalm emoji....

Edited June 1, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[Davo369]

Go with your heart... 

Good luck .....

[kingofthemountain]

Ok i try

 

first where and how do you meet her?

What is her actual work? Where does she lives and with who?

You are not forced to answer but it's very important to know these basics things

to help you because you are not the only one to decide (Like you seem to think)

about your future together. She has also probably an idea about the future but 

the Thai way is to say ''up to you'' and after do everything they can to go in their 

way, and if it's not go their way, usualy everything go south

 

For your question no you can not work legaly in Thailand if you don't have a work permit

work as a teacher on line or some others stuff on internet but it's a ''grey'' area and the risk is real.

If you want (And if you like) to live with a permanent threat above you, let's go, but i don't recomand you to do that.

Edited June 1, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[Davo369]

Marry her... and keep us updated 

[misterjames]

 

18 minutes ago, Davo369 said:

Go with your heart... 

To the ATM

[espanolentailandia]

4 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

Ok i try

first where and how do you meet her?

What is her actual work? Where does she lives and with who?

You are not forced to answer but it's very important to help you because you are

not the only one to decide (Like you seem to think) about your future together.

 

For your question no you can not work legaly in Thailand if you don't have a work permit

work as a teacher on line or some others stuff on internet but it's a ''grey'' area and the risk is real

if you want (And if you like) to live with a permanent threat above you, let's go, but i don't recomand 

you to do that.

 

 

Thanks for your answer. She has a regular job at a manufacturing company with an average salary.

 

I never pretended to be the only one deciding but i just try to find out what's best for us. I don't really like Thailand so if i move there it would just be for her and it would be me the one that should get out of his comfort zone and think about something.

 

So then i read about marriage visa which is the biggest step and i read that i may have an income of at least 40.000 thb monthly to get a marriage visa: https://www.siam-legal.com/thailand-visa/Thailand-Marriage-Visa.php

 

How can someone get it without working or having online income?

 

I wouldn't live with a permanent threat because my main goal would be living in Europe with her in the long run. She also prefers that because the quality of life in Europe is a bit higher ....

 

 

[misterjames]

1 minute ago, espanolentailandia said:

my main goal would be living in Europe with her in the long run. She also prefers that because the quality of life in Europe is a bit higher ....

She prefers it coz she thinks the streets are paved with gold ???? or is this one different?

[espanolentailandia]

Just now, misterjames said:

She prefers it coz she thinks the streets are paved with gold ???? or is this one different?

 

well she may have patience. haven't paid her anything nor invited her to almost anything in 2 years ???? 

[kingofthemountain]

2 minutes ago, espanolentailandia said:

I don't really like Thailand....

 

I wouldn't live with a permanent threat because my main goal would be living in Europe with her in the long run. She also prefers that because the quality of life in Europe is a bit higher ....

You have answered yourself to your question

live in Thailand is really not a good idea for you

and she is right, the quality of life is higher in Europe

 

Can i ask you how old are you?

[misterjames]

1 minute ago, espanolentailandia said:

 

well she may have patience. haven't paid her anything nor invited her to almost anything in 2 years ???? 

How long have you spent in Thailand then? I have never spent money on women either but that doesn't mean that I haven't had gold diggers waste my time for years at a time these women know how to play the long game.

 

I wouldn't be planning my life around any them and and I have dated some stunning ladies here with good jobs education etc I would urge you not to plan your life around them either mate or find out the hard way in 10 years time. 

[espanolentailandia]

1 minute ago, kingofthemountain said:

You have answered yourself to your question

live in Thailand is really not a good idea for you

and she is right, the quality of life is higher in Europe

 

Can i ask you how old are you?

i'd live maybe 1 year with student visa just to learn a bit more about their culture and traditions and learn the language ...

 

I am 26 years old but i don't really thing age matters.

[kingofthemountain]

2 minutes ago, espanolentailandia said:

 

well she may have patience. haven't paid her anything nor invited her to almost anything in 2 years ???? 

She knows already that you have 15000 euros or you have said nothing to her about it?

The Thais can be extremely patients and delude for years if they think a big reward is possible

[Davo369]

[timendres]

2 minutes ago, espanolentailandia said:

i'd live maybe 1 year with student visa just to learn a bit more about their culture and traditions and learn the language ...

 

I am 26 years old but i don't really thing age matters.

It matters in the sense that you have 30+ high-earning, career-building years ahead of you in Europe, versus 30+ years of substandard income potential in Thailand.

[espanolentailandia]

i have never spoken about money and i think she thinks i have like 1000-2000€ at most.

 

anyway my savings are untouchable and at some point both of the couple must get income or the relationship is meaningless and goes nowhere i guess.

[kingofthemountain]

4 minutes ago, espanolentailandia said:

I am 26 years old but i don't really thing age matters.

Age matters, because if you marry now a thai girl the next step

(Next year) is a baby, maybe another. Then your life as a young 

single boy is over, You will be an husband and a father for the rest of your life

with all the problems and responsabilities going with.

It's really what you want? You don't want discover more of the world

to know more girls and do more experiences?

[kingofthemountain]

Like most of the Thais, she has probably no any idea how is the real life in spain

 

Do you live in a city or a village, on the sea side or in the center of the country?

 

What she could do in spain if she wants to earn money? She works in a factory, like

thousands of young Thais, so i presume she doesn't have any technical knowledge or a high level

How is the employement situation in your area? some places in spain have big economical problems.

Also what could be her activities if you work outside? She could be alone in the house or the condo during all day waiting you and dying quickly in boredom (What is your accomodation, a house with garden? a small apptment with one room?)

 

Also in your first post you wrte '' For me it would be a bit risky as it would be something quite new for me and it is totally the opposite from what my family and people around me would expect from me to do.'' 

It seems it's important for you, so have you talked with this people about the idea

of her coming here to live with you? What do they thnk about it?

The last thing she probably wants if she come in spain is to be confronted to an hostile surrounding

 

 

  i know it's a lot of questions but it's better to think about it before to do the big move

 

Edited June 1, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[HerbyJFlash]

Have you looked at the process of getting her to Spain?

 

The process for U.K. seems to be very difficult and from what I’ve read / been told , applications often fail. 

[Puchaiyank]

Likely everyone on this forum has had more than 1 relationship with Thai women...some have had more than they care to count...

 

If at first you don't succeed...wise up and just do the dating/freelancer route...

 

Don't spend more money than you can afford...always keep a large reserve in case you need to exit quickly. 

 

Also, later...many on this forum can advise you on how to exit gracefully...

[mike787]

48 minutes ago, Davo369 said:

Marry her... and keep us updated 

...and give her ALL your time and money...do let us know how it worked out.  Good luck to both of you, you will need it.

[bodga]

1 hour ago, espanolentailandia said:

No she is a really good person and I like her a lot.

 

I don't really understand your answer but I have never pretended to create a troll post or anything like that.

 

I am just trying to get any opinions from people because I believe i can learn a lot from other people's experience.

Go  back to Spain find a nice Spanish girl, don't  bother with the Thais, theyll never  understand you or you them,  youll end  up forking out for her entire family. I  married an orphan and she often hasnt a  clue  what Im  on about even though her English is good.

There is "no thrill" 

 

Edited June 1, 2020 by bodga

[bodga]

32 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

You will be an husband and a father for the rest of your life

with all the problems and responsabilities going with.

Not  really, easy to run away in Thailand, witness  many Thai  women in the  villages with  Fatherless  kids being brought  up  (sic  joke  stuck in front of  tv/mobile)  by grandparents/parents.

[torturedsole]

22 minutes ago, HerbyJFlash said:

Have you looked at the process of getting her to Spain?

 

The process for U.K. seems to be very difficult and from what I’ve read / been told , applications often fail. 

Let's call the settlement process for the UK expensive, rather than difficult.  Applications only fail when the immigration criteria isn't achieved.  

[bwpage3]

You don't have enough money saved to even support yourself.

 

When she finds out you don't have anything for her OR HER FAMILY, she will be gone like the wind.

 

You cannot afford a house, car, gold, land or anything else Thai girls expect getting married to a foreigner.

 

Better research Sin Sod!

 

Did you ever think about that?

 

200 pounds wouldn't even get you one good night out in Thailand.

 

 

[kingofthemountain]

23 minutes ago, bodga said:

Not  really, easy to run away in Thailand, witness  many Thai  women in the  villages with  Fatherless  kids being brought  up  (sic  joke  stuck in front of  tv/mobile)  by grandparents/parents.

I totaly agree with you

however it's more likely the thai boy doing a running as soon as the baby bump appears.

It's one of the reasons Thai girls ''prefer'' the westerners, we have the reputation (Even if

it's not always true) to take care (At least with money) of the child even after the break

with the mother

[male expat]

If you do not really love Thailand, the betteroption for you is to stay in Europe.

There are ladies how can survive in Europe, but they always be Thais.

You never marry a lady alone you marry a needy family, even your lady is and will stay modest.

Working illegal in Thailand is no option. it becomes more and more difficult.

By the way I'm here for more than 20 years with ONE great spouse, but I am financially very healty and I am one in a hundred.

Good luck

[Flow46]