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NON-O without "access" to children/mother


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Hello,

 

my situation is that I don't have contact to the mother anymore (she refuses) and no contact to my children (8 and 12) for around 3 years and I can soon afford to move back to Thailand and want to connect with my children. My plan is something like visiting every weekend or whatever, just to play a bigger role in their lives.

 

Since the children are "parked" at the grandparents and the mother has basically abandoned (I think the children visit her regularly though) them there is a good chance that the grandparents allow me to visit them or take them a weekend. I had good contact with the grandparents and they truthfully liked me. They have a slight fear that I would kidnap them which I just won't and I am willing to give it time to build trust. I have also sparely contact to the children's uncle which can help translate and talk to the grandmother.

 

So, now comes the problem. First of all I want to say that I want to live in Thailand for the sole reason of my children - there is no other specific reason why I would be in Thailand, I would prefer the Philippines or Colombia or whatever.

 

I have these documents:

 

- Original birth certificate for one child

- Original father legitimization with one child (same)

- Tabien Baan copies where the same child + mother is listed

- outdated ID card copies of mother/child

 

There is absolutely no way in obtaining the ID card or any help of the mother at all. Even with money.

 

What are my options to stay in Thailand?

 

I thought about trying to just go to Vientiane and getting the 90 day NON-O and extending it for 60 days and then repeating the process. I think there is a chance that they will give the visa without any ID or signature of the mother? And no ID card of the child? Or maybe an ED visa?

 

Help and ideas are appreciated!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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39 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

my situation is that I don't have contact to the mother anymore (she refuses) and no contact to my children (8 and 12) for around 3 years and I can soon afford to move back to Thailand and want to connect with my children. My plan is something like visiting every weekend or whatever, just to play a bigger role in their lives

A bridge too far springs to mind.

 

One thing you could do initially is consider other visa options.

METV or perhaps non O based on retirement (assuming you are over 50) .

 

If the children's mother is against contact you can forget about grandparents being helpful.

Also kids haven't seen you for 3 years. 

 

Have a read of "Marriage and Divorce" forum.

Lot of first hand experiences there. 

 

Edited by DrJack54
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53 minutes ago, DrJack54 said:

A bridge too far springs to mind.

 

One thing you could do initially is consider other visa options.

METV or perhaps non O based on retirement (assuming you are over 50) .

 

If the children's mother is against contact you can forget about grandparents being helpful.

Also kids haven't seen you for 3 years. 

 

Have a read of "Marriage and Divorce" forum.

Lot of first hand experiences there. 

 

Unfortunately I am way under 50. METV would only be a short period and only possible to get outside of the country. I read a lot in the Marriage/Divorce forum but there aren't any first hand experiences regarding how to handle NON O visa in this case, I wasn't married anyway.

 

I don't think the mother is against me seeing the children, she would just refuse to help me in any way (the last visa I made she purposely wrote her signature incorrectly). Also the uncle tells me sometimes the grandparents (grandmother is the boss) want me to have contact with the children and the children missing me and they also ask about money for support. It feels like that this door is open.

 

The children not seeing me for 3 years is obviously bad, the biggest fear is that they won't even understand me. But why not try to connect anyway, for the children's sake. If it completely fails, I could move on anyway.

 

 

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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34 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

Unfortunately I am way under 50. METV would only be a short period and only possible to get outside of the country...

Are you saying that you are in Thailand at the moment?

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11 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

No, however METV is out of question and instead of METV I could also get 30+30 days extension and do a border hop by land/air.

That might be your best option.

Enter Thailand with either a tourist visa or visa exempt plus 30 day extension.

You would be aware that you can obtain two visa exempt entries via land and each entry can obtain 30 day extension.

 

That buys you time in Thailand to sus out what the situation is with the family first hand and plan forward from there. 

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8 minutes ago, DrJack54 said:

That might be your best option.

Enter Thailand with either a tourist visa or visa exempt plus 30 day extension.

You would be aware that you can obtain two visa exempt entries via land and each entry can obtain 30 day extension.

 

That buys you time in Thailand to sus out what the situation is with the family first hand and plan forward from there. 

Yeah, the issue is not getting temporary stay...

 

Do I need anything from the mother of the children for a NON O though?

 

I have read now in another post that the consulate in Laos doesn't ask for any ID cards nor mother's signatures.

 

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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https://aseannow.com/topic/1295738-report-non-o-family-member-visa-at-savannakhet/

In this recent report the OP, wanted to apply at the Savannakhet Consultate for the 1-year MultipleEntry Non Imm O Visa for reason of Thai dependant children . He wrote:

I didn't required a copy of my Girlfriend's passport because I'm applying for a Non O because of my Son.

Then after handing 5,000 Baht... I was told Multi-Entry Non O Visas can't be done for Family Members... only Married or Retirement. So he gave me 3,000 baht back. I'm not sure of the reason for this... it was a long line, people are waiting... I didn't care to ask... so Single Entry Non O Visa it is.

So - although the 1 year ME - is not an option, it seems that you could get there a 90-day Non Imm O Visa for reason of dependant children (which is of course better than a Tourist Visa or Visa Exempt entries).

 

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18 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

Yeah, the issue is not getting temporary stay...

 

Do I need anything from the mother of the children for a NON O though?

 

I have read now in another post that the consulate in Laos doesn't ask for any ID cards nor mother's signatures.

 

Read this thread.

It has a few helpful posts from ubonjoe in this thread (as always).

 

When he refers to non O at immigration he is referring to application in Thailand.

 

Also advice if applying in Savannakhet or Vientiane.

Be aware that Vientiane requires appointment. 

 

 

 

Edited by DrJack54
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57 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

Yeah, the issue is not getting temporary stay...

Do I need anything from the mother of the children for a NON O though?

I have read now in another post that the consulate in Laos doesn't ask for any ID cards nor mother's signatures.

When applying in Thailand at an Imm Office for a 90-day Non Imm O for reason of marriage or dependant children, your wife or child has to be with you at moment of application (same for 60-day extensions).

There is no need to prove any financials or be accompanied by wife/child when applying for the SingleEntry 90-day or 1-yearMultipleEntry Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet Consulate, but obviously you need the documents that provide evidence of your relationship when applying there. 

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16 minutes ago, Red Phoenix said:

When applying in Thailand at an Imm Office for a 90-day Non Imm O for reason of marriage or dependant children, your wife or child has to be with you at moment of application (same for 60-day extensions).

For the 60 day extension I was alone a couple of times and it wasn't an issue (as far as I can remember, but I think one time the immigration officer asked to bring the child next time). Only for the 1 year extension the immigration officer asked specifically about the child (not for the mother). It's a long time since then though, also probably differently from office to office and if agents are involved.

 

 

16 minutes ago, Red Phoenix said:

There is no need to prove any financials or be accompanied by wife/child when applying for the SingleEntry 90-day or 1-yearMultipleEntry Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet Consulate, but obviously you need the documents that provide evidence of your relationship when applying there. 

I did this a couple of times in Vientiane but always provided ID cards and signature along, hence my question if its possible without ID cards and signatures.

 

It looks like the possible option for me would be to get the 90 day NON O (or even multiple entry?!) and either get them extended (maybe by an agent) or get another 90 day NON O. Are there limits though? I remember to have read that this method was done indefinite by people who weren't able to show the 400k/800k for the yearly visa.

 

 

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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You wrote that you are under 50 years of age, so your only Non Imm O options are for reason of marriage or for reason of dependant children.

With your official Marriage certificate you could apply for the Single 90-day or Multiple Entry 1-year Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet consulate (not sure whether they also want a recent 'still married' statement). 

With an official statement of your Thai dependant child you could also apply there for the 90-day Non Imm O Visa (but not for the Multiple Entry).  But obviously the 1-year ME Non Imm O Visa (marriage) is preferable.

In Thailand you would not be able to apply for the 90-day Non Imm O (marriage) without co-operation of your wife.  But you might be able to do so for reason of dependant children.  In both cases - when appling in Thailand - you also need to meet the financial requirements, while there are no financial requirements to be proven when applying in Savannakhet.

NOTE: Applying in Savannekhet does not require an appointment, while that is required at the Vientianne Thai Embassy.  The requirements to be met can be also slightly different in Savannakhet and Vientianne.  So best do a search on the Forum on recent threads of members sharing their experience..

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11 minutes ago, Red Phoenix said:

You wrote that you are under 50 years of age, so your only Non Imm O options are for reason of marriage or for reason of dependant children.

With your official Marriage certificate you could apply for the Single 90-day or Multiple Entry 1-year Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet consulate (not sure whether they also want a recent 'still married' statement). 

With an official statement of your Thai dependant child you could also apply there for the 90-day Non Imm O Visa (but not for the Multiple Entry).  But obviously the 1-year ME Non Imm O Visa (marriage) is preferable.

In Thailand you would not be able to apply for the 90-day Non Imm O (marriage) without co-operation of your wife.  But you might be able to do so for reason of dependant children.  In both cases - when appling in Thailand - you also need to meet the financial requirements, while there are no financial requirements to be proven when applying in Savannakhet.

NOTE: Applying in Savannekhet does not require an appointment, while that is required at the Vientianne Thai Embassy.  The requirements to be met can be also slightly different in Savannakhet and Vientianne.  So best do a search on the Forum on recent threads of members sharing their experience..

I wasn't married to the mother. And regarding the multi entry NON O you already quoted the report from the @JGon which stated that Savannakhet isn't doing multiple entry NON Os for non marriage/retirement.

 

Regarding searching the forum for the specific situation I am in: Every thread I found so far has "signed ID card copies of the mother" listed, thus it is a dead end, except the recent one from @JGon which says no ID card needed and even on the Savannakhet website it doesn't list that requirement.

 

So, NON O for 90 days seems to have high chance of succeeding without ID cards/signatures. For how long though,... And 60 day or 1 year extension without accompanying child probably not possible from what I understood so far. I even read that even if you're using an agent the child has to be with you.

 

 

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1 hour ago, SuperSaiyan said:

So, NON O for 90 days seems to have high chance of succeeding without ID cards/signatures. For how long though,... And 60 day or 1 year extension without accompanying child probably not possible from what I understood so far. I even read that even if you're using an agent the child has to be with you

Seems you have clear understanding of your options. 

Not sure what advice you are after. 

From your OP here is a snip...

 

"I can soon afford to move back to Thailand and want to connect with my children."

 

Implies limited funds.

Rules out PE Visa.

You also mention long way from 50yr of age. 

Also difficulties with children family assisting. 

 

Square peg round hole. 

 

Edited by DrJack54
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1 hour ago, DrJack54 said:

Seems you have clear understanding of your options. 

Not sure what advice you are after. 

 

 

Reaffirming that getting single entry NON O (90 days) without any signatures and without any ID cards and without the possibility of extending (would need child accompanying which is a "maybe later") is my best and probably only chance to stay the next couple of years in Thailand. I am still thinking of the ED-Visa route as well though.

 

Elite Visa is an option, or it isn't, because in this case I would rather just donate the 600k directly to my children and pay the grandparents the money to support my further visa extensions,... which is overall what I am thinking of anyway how it could play out in the end, me paying a monthly amount and the grandparents help me with visa requirements (like child accompanying or pictures and stuff) and I get more access to my children.

 

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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3 minutes ago, rattlesnake said:

I would ask an agent to sort it out for me.

It's definitely on my list to check out locally. I got discouraged as I saw that the agents also state the "signed ID card" as requirement on their websites.

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10 minutes ago, SuperSaiyan said:

It's definitely on my list to check out locally. I got discouraged as I saw that the agents also state the "signed ID card" as requirement on their websites.

Still worth asking IMO. I can PM you the details of a good one if you want.

The ED visa option is good too, back in my time (it may have changed) you got your 1-year non-O and had to attend 4 hours of classes per week. And you get to learn Thai which is never a bad idea.

Edited by rattlesnake
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If you have a son your odds may improve. Not sure how important the visa is to you. I would just show up at the house. Some family members may be on your side, Ubon Joe was and remains the go to guy. I am going through the same horror show with my daughter's mother. Good luck.

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1 hour ago, rattlesnake said:

Still worth asking IMO. I can PM you the details of a good one if you want.

The ED visa option is good too, back in my time (it may have changed) you got your 1-year non-O and had to attend 4 hours of classes per week. And you get to learn Thai which is never a bad idea.

Yeah, it's definitely on the list I would check locally as it might be different than online presences.

 

47 minutes ago, d4dang said:

If you have a son your odds may improve.

Yes, indeed, the papers I have are all for my son. Why do you think that this will improve anything?

 

47 minutes ago, d4dang said:

Not sure how important the visa is to you. I would just show up at the house. Some family members may be on your side,

Well, as I said, I want to connect with my children, without access to my children there's nothing in Thailand for me. Nobody except the uncle would understand me but he does not live there and the risk of the mother being there should be also eliminated (I know that she isn't there, but just safety first).

 

 

47 minutes ago, d4dang said:

I am going through the same horror show with my daughter's mother. Good luck.

Thank you, and good luck to you as well.

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5 hours ago, SuperSaiyan said:
6 hours ago, d4dang said:

If you have a son your odds may improve.

Yes, indeed, the papers I have are all for my son. Why do you think that this will improve anything?

You are under 50 years of age and not married to a Thai national. 

For sure entering Thailand VisaExempt or on a Tourist Visa would be no problem at all (unless you have a recent heavy history of staying long in the country on VEs or TVs). 

But to answer your question > If you want to stay long-term in Thailand, having a Thai dependant son will be of help.

As it will allow you to apply for a 90-day Non Imm O Visa for reason of dependant Thai child.

Some of the confusion in this thread is that the requirements for such application are different depending on where you apply (as you already found out).  

Here are the possibilities:

1- Applying for the eVisa in your home-country

2- Applying in Thailand at the Imm Office of the province where you are residing

3- Applying at a Thai Embassy/Consulate in a neighboring country

For 1 and 2 it seems that the requirement of a signed front/back Thai ID-card, will make it difficult for you to take that route.

But 3 might be an option - as confirmed by another poster you can get the 90-day Non Imm O Visa for reason of dependant Thai child at the Savannakhet consulate.  You would need the birth-certificate of your son and a copy of the house-book with his name on it (the latter might therefore also block that road). 

 

>> A possible scenario for you might be the following:

Enter Thailand VisaExempt (easiest way and provides you with a 30-day permission to stay on entry), and then stay at or visit your son at his grand-parents. 

You can extend that stay easily to 6 months (by applying for a 30-day extension, and doing 2 border-runs allowing you to repeat that). 

During those 6 months you would probably have gained the trust of his grand-parents, and they might then provide you with a copy of the required documents (e.g. the house-book should be an easy one).  And that would allow you then to apply for the 90-day Non Imm O Visa for reason of Thai dependant child at the Savannakhet consulate. 

Note that it's not clear whether the local Imm Office would be willing to provide a 1-year permission to stay based on that 90-day Non Imm O Visa (as you might not have the required documents for such in-country extension), but you could of course once again exit Thailand and apply for a new 90-day Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet consulate.

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5 hours ago, Red Phoenix said:

 

But to answer your question > If you want to stay long-term in Thailand, having a Thai dependant son will be of help.

II interpreted @d4dang in the way that he meant that there could be a difference between girl and boy.

 

5 hours ago, Red Phoenix said:

2- Applying in Thailand at the Imm Office of the province where you are residing

Yeah, I just figured out recently that it is possible to convert the tourist extension to the NON O within the country. Seems that would make the agent route even more a possibility.

 

5 hours ago, Red Phoenix said:

For 1 and 2 it seems that the requirement of a signed front/back Thai ID-card, will make it difficult for you to take that route.

Do you have a source for that? I mean, I read it already a lot of times but not on an official website.

 

5 hours ago, Red Phoenix said:

>> A possible scenario for you might be the following:

Enter Thailand VisaExempt (easiest way and provides you with a 30-day permission to stay on entry), and then stay at or visit your son at his grand-parents. 

You can extend that stay easily to 6 months (by applying for a 30-day extension, and doing 2 border-runs allowing you to repeat that). 

During those 6 months you would probably have gained the trust of his grand-parents, and they might then provide you with a copy of the required documents (e.g. the house-book should be an easy one).  And that would allow you then to apply for the 90-day Non Imm O Visa for reason of Thai dependant child at the Savannakhet consulate. 

Yes, short term solutions seem to be definitely possible but also the 90 day NON O seems to be possible with the docs I have (at least outside of Thailand in Svannakhet/Vientiane). And I probably could also fly in/out instead of land border increasing the chance of doing maybe another 30+30 days. That's a good starting point.

 

I have the Tabien Baan copy already but I also remember to have read that they want to see the original Tabien Baan - but that info is from 5 years ago or I mixed something up along the way.

 

 

5 hours ago, Red Phoenix said:

Note that it's not clear whether the local Imm Office would be willing to provide a 1-year permission to stay based on that 90-day Non Imm O Visa (as you might not have the required documents for such in-country extension), but you could of course once again exit Thailand and apply for a new 90-day Non Imm O Visa at the Savannakhet consulate.

The 1 year extension was only possible with accompanying child the last time I did it and the officer made the mother sign also documents (maybe required, maybe not). So, 1 year extension might be out of question anyway but if I already built a relationship with the grandparents and my children by then, the accompanying child would be a possible at least for the 60 day extension for the 90 days NON O and the officer could be checked out what he would ask for the 1 year extension.

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35 minutes ago, RedCardinal said:

My situation is different, but there are some similarities.  My most recent experience might be of some value.  Here's my context:

* I'm in Phuket

* never married my son's mother

* legitimised my son via Family Court when he was ~2

* relationship ended ~7 years ago

* son is now 10 and lives in Bangkok

* I maintain both son and mother, and see him frequently + on talking terms with his mother

 

First thing - location within Thailand matters.  Different Immigration offices seem to make up their own rules.  I'm in Phuket, and when I applied for Non-O based on Thai family, they expected him to be in this region also.  He had to accompany me to Immigration to apply for my most recent visa (in-country switch from tourist to Non-O) and on previous extension applications.   At one time a couple of years ago the Phuket IOs suggested I go to Bangkok since that was my son's location, but Bangkok IOs said I needed to apply in Phuket where I was registered.  Go-figure...  So residing in the same Immigration area as your kids may be beneficial.

What was the proof that your son was living in Bangkok? Is his Tabien Baan in Bangkok or just took the statement "he's living in BKK" as what it is? And where did you apply then at the end?

 

 

 

35 minutes ago, RedCardinal said:

but they gave the distinct impression they expect him to be fully resident in the same home. 

Yes, I have had the feeling as well that they don't really like foreigners not staying together as a family. On the other hand, my experiences were also different from time to time, one time no signatures / no accompanying child required for 60 days extension inside Thailand, next time "bring your child next time" but didn't ask for any signatures of the mother.

 

I don't know if I have shared custody, I just have the legitimization. I might get it translate but I doubt it will change anything regarding how to approach long stay visa.

 

 

35 minutes ago, RedCardinal said:

 

I expect you're going to have a lot of trouble jumping through hoops to even get an initial visa in-country.  It may be easier from an embassy/consulate, and I think will likely issue a SE Non-O with the docs you mentioned. 

Yeah, with current info I wouldn't try going to the immigration in-country for 60 day / 1 year extension or even 1st NON O - except through agent route.

 

 

35 minutes ago, RedCardinal said:

 

Getting an extension is probably your sole solution longer-term, and that will likely require at least some interaction and accommodation from the mother.  Without that, you may be faced with a long and expensive legal trek in order to meet Immigration requirements for the issuance of a long term visa/extension.

I think the 90 day NON O from outside Thailand was or is still done by many people who can't afford the 400k. That's at least what I read couple of years ago, that the solution is to just do a border hop every 90+60 days (in my case after 90 days) to get another NON O. So, this - besides the agent route or an ED visa - is what I consider possible right now to stay a couple of years in Thailand.

 

There is absolutely no chance that the mother would help, however, maybe the grandparents could influence her at one point (it didn't really work the first time as the grandmother tried to intervene in the separation). But I also don't want to be dependent on her in any way - this would probably lead to more problems. In the end, she might give me an ID card incorrectly signed on purpose and the consulate staff would ask me if I forged the signature (happened the last time in Penang).

Edited by SuperSaiyan
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38 minutes ago, RedCardinal said:

  My recent inquiries to nearby Thai embassies/consulates regarding ME Non-O based on Thai family all drew blanks.  So it seems that ME for this visa class may be no longer issued

First up Excellent post.

 

Regards the ME Non O based on Thai family....

Was that ever available?

I realize ME Non O based on marriage is available and even that not everywhere.

 

Savannakhet being the go to for most expats living in Thailand.

 

 

 

 

Edited by DrJack54
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40 minutes ago, DrJack54 said:

Regards the ME Non O based on Thai family....

Was that ever available?

At one time, it was available in Penang, but required financial proof. It is unclear if they still do them.

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21 hours ago, SuperSaiyan said:

Yeah, it's definitely on the list I would check locally as it might be different than online presences.

 

Yes, indeed, the papers I have are all for my son. Why do you think that this will improve anything?

 

Well, as I said, I want to connect with my children, without access to my children there's nothing in Thailand for me. Nobody except the uncle would understand me but he does not live there and the risk of the mother being there should be also eliminated (I know that she isn't there, but just safety first).

 

 

Thank you, and good luck to you as well.

I went through all the legal processes at the time 18 years ago for about 4 years. My legal rep was a retired judge who was respected. I have a daughter and he told me that was a problem as daughters end up with mothers while sons end up with fathers and this seems to be a precedent official or not. Custody agreements are rarely enforced. Having a son should improve your odds. My info is dated so it may no longer be valid or? My daughter now lives in India with her mother and Indian husband. I hope you will succeed and enjoy many years with your kid/s. I have not seen my daughter for 14 years.

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You say you haven't seen them in Three years.

 

Did they learn as babies to speak your language, or do you speak Thai?

 

If not you are going to be in a very tough spot, neither of you will be able to communicate.

 

Regardless of the visa stuff, have you considered how hard this will be if they don't speak your language, and you theirs?

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