malct Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 My Thai wife's son is dating a Thai lady and now she is talking marriage even though she has only known my wife's son for 3 months and my wife is saying that its going to cost half Million in total plus the dowry . I know when i married my wife in Thailand it was really cheap, apparently you need to buy gold for the Thai Bride , The ceremony and a party plus other stuff. They are both 30 years old and neither have been married or have children . The family of the girlfriend have a business, So i guess they are up in the Thai status with both of their other daughters marrying businessmen Without really knowing the cost of a Thai Wedding , I just wonder if 500,000 Baht is about right . I believe that any dowry paid will be going back to the married Couple, That's if they do get married My wife is paying for wedding , So its nothing out of my pocket, But i don't want her getting ripped off , I question Why the GF hasn't been married before and why the rush, If it was me , I would run a mile with talk of marriage so early on... And no babies on the way yet LOL I guess if it was the UK , You would be talking a lot of money but Thailand is suppose to be cheap 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post transam Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 1 minute ago, malct said: My Thai wife's son is dating a Thai lady and now she is talking marriage even though she has only known my wife's son for 3 months and my wife is saying that its going to cost half Million in total plus the dowry . I know when i married my wife in Thailand it was really cheap, apparently you need to buy gold for the Thai Bride , The ceremony and a party plus other stuff. They are both 30 years old and neither have been married or have children . The family of the girlfriend have a business, So i guess they are up in the Thai status with both of their other daughters marrying businessmen Without really knowing the cost of a Thai Wedding , I just wonder if 500,000 Baht is about right . I believe that any dowry paid will be going back to the married Couple, That's if they do get married My wife is paying for wedding , So its nothing out of my pocket, But i don't want her getting ripped off , I question Why the GF hasn't been married before and why the rush, If it was me , I would run a mile with talk of marriage so early on... And no babies on the way yet LOL I guess if it was the UK , You would be talking a lot of money but Thailand is suppose to be cheap I think your Mrs. will know all about it, if it's her money, don't interfere, say NOTHING........... 3 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richard_smith237 Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 A lot of 'it' depends where, what type of reception, how many people etc.... Also... the couple will recover some of the cost with 'envelope' money. (in effect, my wedding was free after the envelope money had been totted up). I wouldn't worry about the age of the Woman in question - plenty of women remain unmarried until their 30's... if could mean they are bonkers and no bloke will go near them, it could also mean they are switched on and avoid d-heads... Talk of marriage so early is a bit of an alarm though !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callmeishmael Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 A couple of my wife's nieces married within the past 10 years. One had a simple country wedding at her Aunt and Uncle's house, (not us, another Aunt and Uncle) which cost about 100k with a dowry of about the same (which went back to the couple). The other one married a wealthy Thai-Chinese guy. I don't know what the wedding cost, but I suspect it was over a million. The dowry was a 20 million baht house in Bangkok. This one is my wife's real niece, the first was one of these related through marriage 'nieces'. So, 500,000 for a pair of working professionals, sounds about right. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Yorkshire Tea Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 (edited) Tell your wife's son to get married when he can afford to 😉 Edited April 20 by Yorkshire Tea 1 1 1 1 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheFatOne Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 8 minutes ago, Yorkshire Tea said: Tell your wife's son to get married when he can afford to 😉 Yeah exactly What the hell ! 1 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marin Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 1 hour ago, transam said: I think your Mrs. will know all about it, if it's her money, don't interfere, say NOTHING........... Do this and be very happy indeed you have this option. Dont even read more comments. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AreYouGerman Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 For dowry: Virgin: 1,000,000 Non-Virgin: 50,000 Non-Virgin with rich parents: Up to the rich parents to save face. Party and wedding depends on the status of both families. If both family are rich/rich, then no limits. If the girls family's rich, then some behind closed door discussions should be made to save face for the new couple. If everybody is poor just get a 50,000 Mor Lam 'night event' and a lot of alcohol. 1 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post still kicking Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 5 minutes ago, AreYouGerman said: For dowry: Virgin: 1,000,000 Non-Virgin: 50,000 Non-Virgin with rich parents: Up to the rich parents to save face. Party and wedding depends on the status of both families. If both family are rich/rich, then no limits. If the girls family's rich, then some behind closed door discussions should be made to save face for the new couple. If everybody is poor just get a 50,000 Mor Lam 'night event' and a lot of alcohol. Nonsense 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AreYouGerman Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 Just now, still kicking said: Nonsense Nah, it's facts and also good advice and that would be the standard for me. But you can obviously give your future wive who did the carousel more. Everybody's free in his decisions. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post still kicking Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 3 minutes ago, AreYouGerman said: Nah, it's facts and also good advice and that would be the standard for me. But you can obviously give your future wive who did the carousel more. Everybody's free in his decisions. My wife was a virgin when we got married, I paid a dowry of 22.000 baht and got most of it back and we are still married for 23 years 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richard_smith237 Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 (edited) 8 minutes ago, still kicking said: 15 minutes ago, AreYouGerman said: For dowry: Virgin: 1,000,000 Non-Virgin: 50,000 Non-Virgin with rich parents: Up to the rich parents to save face. Party and wedding depends on the status of both families. If both family are rich/rich, then no limits. If the girls family's rich, then some behind closed door discussions should be made to save face for the new couple. If everybody is poor just get a 50,000 Mor Lam 'night event' and a lot of alcohol. Nonsense Agreed... it reads like a mongers outlook to Sin-Sod... The reality is each sitation is so very different from another and takes a little understanding of the social dynamics, socio-economics, education levels etc and even where you are located etc. One of my Wife's friends received millions of Baht in Sin-Sod - mine was nowhere near that, but money was returned anyway. Wedding costs totalled about 1.2 Million Baht and we received that amount in envelope money (it was a large wedding with a lot of guests most of whom neither my Wife no I had met before - lots of friends of the 'In-Laws' - they all left fairly early on and about 200 friends enjoyed the after party with band and DJ's until about 2am)... Edited April 20 by richard_smith237 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AreYouGerman Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 Just now, still kicking said: My wife was a virgin when we got married, I paid a dowry of 22.000 baht and got most of it back and we are still married for 23 years That's so nice! Time's have changed buddy, the commodity is very rare now and thus price has increased! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sherwood Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 No mate. Don't listen to the wife. Spend as little as possible. Well not unless you want to establish a president. 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pasathai Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 depends on how many people get a cut of the money Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
it is what it is Posted April 20 Share Posted April 20 as your wife is thai surely she's best placed to explain about thai weddings and answer any questions you have. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post richard_smith237 Posted April 20 Popular Post Share Posted April 20 1 hour ago, sherwood said: No mate. Don't listen to the wife. Spend as little as possible. Well not unless you want to establish a president. No need to bring Trump into it.... Op mentioned its the Wife's money, so its up to her how much she spends, Op isn't spending a baht, but wants to be sure or understand that his wife is not being taken advantage of somehow... thats admirable.... 1 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malct Posted April 21 Author Share Posted April 21 17 hours ago, richard_smith237 said: No need to bring Trump into it.... Op mentioned its the Wife's money, so its up to her how much she spends, Op isn't spending a baht, but wants to be sure or understand that his wife is not being taken advantage of somehow... thats admirable.... You correct, You hear about too many scams especially when the mother is married to a westerner . The girl in question is very much switched on and she has worked most of her adult life for Chang ... Thats where she met the wifes son, He also works for the Chang but in a different depot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malct Posted April 21 Author Share Posted April 21 Thank you all for your replies. Your correct in letting the wife get on with it, Its her money and she knows best 😉 Like or Thai women do. I wasn't really aware of the money in the envelope and asking the wife , she is saying that it either goes to her son or to her , It depends on family tradition Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post spidermike007 Posted April 21 Popular Post Share Posted April 21 Anyone who is not willing to really take their time to get to know somebody and who is even discussing the possibility of marriage three months into a relationship needs serious psychoanalysis. It's just a problem waiting to happen. Try to do everything in your power to discourage him from moving that quickly. I always like to say if it's good it's only going to get better, if there are issues they're going to reveal themselves over time. You really don't know who you're dealing with until you're at least one or two years into the relationship. The next question I would have is who's making the decisions in his life? If it's not him it's going to be her. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post malct Posted April 21 Author Popular Post Share Posted April 21 47 minutes ago, spidermike007 said: Anyone who is not willing to really take their time to get to know somebody and who is even discussing the possibility of marriage three months into a relationship needs serious psychoanalysis. It's just a problem waiting to happen. Try to do everything in your power to discourage him from moving that quickly. I always like to say if it's good it's only going to get better, if there are issues they're going to reveal themselves over time. You really don't know who you're dealing with until you're at least one or two years into the relationship. The next question I would have is who's making the decisions in his life? If it's not him it's going to be her. I am watching from the sidelines and its like the son is being lead into the lions den, Also like an arranged marriage , My wife's first marriage was arranged and that ended in Divorce but we have told them that if any marriage, Then its going to be next year at the soonest and even then, It will be going into the summer of next year by the time my wife can get time off. The wife seems to like this girl, She is switched on and to be truthful i feel sorry for the son, I feel that he is under pressure to have this relationship, He is 30 years old , He doesn't have a care in the world, He can go out drinking and he will be losing his freedom. I understand that falling in love can be magical and most of us have been there were you do want to live your life with someone until the wife takes a bite from the wedding cake which causes a nasty reaction that causes her to start dictating and nagging But hey, That's most women for you. To be totally honest, People are far better just living together than getting married , End of the day its a bit of paper that can end up costing you a fortune if it goes wrong especially if its in the UK 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Korat Kiwi Posted April 21 Popular Post Share Posted April 21 22 hours ago, AreYouGerman said: For dowry: Virgin: 1,000,000 Non-Virgin: 50,000 Non-Virgin with rich parents: Up to the rich parents to save face. Party and wedding depends on the status of both families. If both family are rich/rich, then no limits. If the girls family's rich, then some behind closed door discussions should be made to save face for the new couple. If everybody is poor just get a 50,000 Mor Lam 'night event' and a lot of alcohol. Based on experiences... I'd rather have a non virgin thanks. A million baht... WTF. That would pay for how many non virgins in Pattaya? Unbelievable. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post AreYouGerman Posted April 21 Popular Post Share Posted April 21 16 minutes ago, Korat Kiwi said: Based on experiences... I'd rather have a non virgin thanks. A million baht... WTF. That would pay for how many non virgins in Pattaya? Unbelievable. For casual sex, I agree. Not as a wife though. The 2 virgins I had while I was 17-18 are still in contact with me, none of the others. It's just a complete difference. For non-virgins, you are just another guy in the queue and can be replaced just like that. 1 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richard_smith237 Posted April 21 Share Posted April 21 5 hours ago, malct said: The girl in question is very much switched on and she has worked most of her adult life for Chang ... Thats where she met the wifes son She works for Chang ???... Or she works for Chang ????? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
still kicking Posted April 21 Share Posted April 21 2 hours ago, Korat Kiwi said: Based on experiences... I'd rather have a non virgin thanks. A million baht... WTF. That would pay for how many non virgins in Pattaya? Unbelievable. He is just talking BS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ericthai Posted April 21 Share Posted April 21 2 hours ago, malct said: I am watching from the sidelines and its like the son is being lead into the lions den, Also like an arranged marriage , My wife's first marriage was arranged and that ended in Divorce but we have told them that if any marriage, Then its going to be next year at the soonest and even then, It will be going into the summer of next year by the time my wife can get time off. The wife seems to like this girl, She is switched on and to be truthful i feel sorry for the son, I feel that he is under pressure to have this relationship, He is 30 years old , He doesn't have a care in the world, He can go out drinking and he will be losing his freedom. I understand that falling in love can be magical and most of us have been there were you do want to live your life with someone until the wife takes a bite from the wedding cake which causes a nasty reaction that causes her to start dictating and nagging But hey, That's most women for you. To be totally honest, People are far better just living together than getting married , End of the day its a bit of paper that can end up costing you a fortune if it goes wrong especially if its in the UK It's a little sad you're telling a 30 yr old what he can do. You do realize a Thai girl in her 30's is consider an old maid and doesn't have many choices. I would stay out of it, it's her son and her money! I used to weigh in on family issues, but I learned my lesson years ago and now stay out of it. My wife would get upset and talk badly about her sister, I would agree and express my thoughts, but later it would come back to bite me for talking bad about her sister. So know I let family deal with family. Don't get me wrong I'll support my wife on her decisions but when it comes to her family I just agree with her and hold my thoughts. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malct Posted April 21 Author Share Posted April 21 45 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said: She works for Chang ???... Or she works for Chang ????? she is on sales Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AreYouGerman Posted April 21 Share Posted April 21 46 minutes ago, still kicking said: He is just talking BS And you are. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spidermike007 Posted April 22 Share Posted April 22 (edited) 13 hours ago, malct said: I am watching from the sidelines and its like the son is being lead into the lions den, Also like an arranged marriage , My wife's first marriage was arranged and that ended in Divorce but we have told them that if any marriage, Then its going to be next year at the soonest and even then, It will be going into the summer of next year by the time my wife can get time off. The wife seems to like this girl, She is switched on and to be truthful i feel sorry for the son, I feel that he is under pressure to have this relationship, He is 30 years old , He doesn't have a care in the world, He can go out drinking and he will be losing his freedom. I understand that falling in love can be magical and most of us have been there were you do want to live your life with someone until the wife takes a bite from the wedding cake which causes a nasty reaction that causes her to start dictating and nagging But hey, That's most women for you. To be totally honest, People are far better just living together than getting married , End of the day its a bit of paper that can end up costing you a fortune if it goes wrong especially if its in the UK I always like to say relationships are much like a ship, and every ship needs a captain. If the man's not willing to be the captain the woman has to step in and take over the helm. Someone needs to establish control. If a guy is too wimpy to assert control over his life, and make his own decisions, he gets what is coming to him. And that applies much more here than it does in the West. Edited April 22 by spidermike007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1FinickyOne Posted April 24 Share Posted April 24 next month we are paying 400,000 baht for a nephew's ordainment party... there will be a few days of food for the entire village and a few days of music etc... so, 500,000 is probably not too far from the bottom rung of wedding expenses for people with some money. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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