I probably should have paid the money.

[MalcolmB]

33 minutes ago, cdemundo said:

Wow.

Maybe you can't afford $50 once a year for his birthday, but I am guessing you probably can.

So why not be the bigger person and pay the whole bill to keep your son happy?

Sounds like the lady was an annoying old hen and I understand your desire to stick it to her, even still ...

Birthday is once a year, what will your son remember, a fun party or a drama over the bill?

I guess it's "the principle of the thing".

Pathetically petty.

gives all us good farangs a bad name

[MalcolmB]

49 minutes ago, renaissanc said:

If someone takes the trouble to report what happened to them we should assume that the person is telling the truth and not call him a liar just because we don't like the story for some reason. Not everyone is a politician, lawyer, criminal, or drug cartel member.

Ok Bob, Colin, Don and Robert. 

[MalcolmB]

17 minutes ago, PJ71 said:

Wow.

 

I'd suspect his son will remember a bossy mum that was trying to ram things down his throat that he does not want.

 

I would not dream of going to an arranged party and then taking over what had been arranged, would you?

Well considering this party was on rations of one slice and a glass of water each it probably needed a bit extra to make it more memorable.

[hughrection]

I tip my cap to your Sir & applaud your decision. 🙂 

[rough diamond]

59 minutes ago, PJ71 said:

This is your most sensible post ever.

It is certainly very clear (of meaningful content as usual).

[Packer]

41 minutes ago, hughrection said:

I tip my cap to your Sir & applaud your decision. 🙂 

 

10 hours ago, alien365 said:

I'd have done something similar to you.

 

1 hour ago, renaissanc said:

You did the right thing.

 

Thank you. 🙂 

[PJ71]

1 hour ago, MalcolmB said:

Well considering this party was on rations of one slice and a glass of water each it probably needed a bit extra to make it more memorable.

Pls send the dimesions of the cake, i don't remember noticing that in the OP

[Packer]

One suspects that some posters grew up without ever getting a birthday cake. 🙂 

[Ralf001]

6 minutes ago, Packer said:

One suspects that some posters grew up without ever getting a birthday cake. 🙂 

 

My parents were killed in a car accident before my 1st birthday... I grew up in orphanages and cardboard boxes.... no cake.

[Packer]

5 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

 

My parents were killed in a car accident before my 1st birthday... I grew up in orphanages and cardboard boxes.... no cake.

 

I'll give your info to the busybody motormouth and she'll be round to buy you a sundae. 🙂 

[cdemundo]

2 hours ago, PJ71 said:

Wow.

 

I'd suspect his son will remember a bossy mum that was trying to ram things down his throat that he does not want.

 

I would not dream of going to an arranged party and then taking over what had been arranged, would you?

"I'd suspect his son will remember a bossy mum that was trying to ram things down his throat that he does not want."

You might be right but the OP said:

"It's now going round on group chat's that my son's father is tight and stingy and not good."

So the drama did not go unnoticed.

 

"I would not dream of going to an arranged party and then taking over what had been arranged, would you?"

As I said "Sounds like the lady was an annoying old hen and I understand your desire to stick it to her.."

 

 

[RamblingOn]

On 4/2/2025 at 12:33 PM, Packer said:

But sometimes Thais make me want to pull out my hair.

 

It was my son's 11th birthday. We organized an ice cream cake at Swensen's at the shopping mall his friends and him hangout at every Saturday. He chose a 3lb chocolate ice cream cake, and arranged with his friends to meet him here at the specified time. More than enough for the 7 or 8 of his friends that showed up. First came one of their mothers, a loud busybody that never shuts up, straight away she was into dragging my son to the fridge to go through all the different cakes even though he had already chosen it. Then going through the entire menu with him even though he had already chosen it. Every one sits down, the plates and glasses of water arrive, everyone is chatting and laughing. The busybody comes down with the menus and is in everyone's face going through every page getting them to order sundae's etc. There's a big ice cream cake coming, why not just sit down and shut up. She's making them choose then double choose then triple choose pointing out extras. Everyone's settled and laughing and joking and then she declares we're going to move tables to the slightly wider table behind. Everyone has their bags and toys and phones and plates and glasses of water out on the table already, most don't even hear her because they're in the zone. She forces everyone up to move to the other table. The sundaes she made everyone order even though the big cake was ordered and coming started arriving and she was up trying to organize who gets what and what extras do they they want, maybe add this, maybe add that why not get this too etc just sit down and shut up. Each kid gets a big slice of the 3lb cake and loves it, none can finish the slice of cake and their sundae, of course. 

 

It came to the end and I got up to pay and told the waitress to bill me for the only the cake. Of course this simple request almost melted the minds, brains and computer system in the store and took 10 minutes and numerous managers and staff to figure out. 

 

I paid the 800 baht for the cake and left, leaving the rest of the 1,700 baht bill for the busybody motormouth to take care of. Maybe next time she'll sit down and shut up and let everybody enjoy their own time. 

 

It's now going round on group chat's that my son's father is tight and stingy and not good. 

 

 

Thailand. 

When in Rome do as the Romans!!!!

[ColeBOzbourne]

1 hour ago, Ralf001 said:

My parents were killed in a car accident before my 1st birthday... I grew up in orphanages and cardboard boxes.... no cake.

My mom died two years before I was born. I never had a dad. I had one spoon of dry rice every morning, just to ease the hunger pains. Then some warm water for lunch to make the rice swell up. Udder than that I didn't have nuffin'. 

[spidermike007]

On 4/2/2025 at 12:33 PM, Packer said:

But sometimes Thais make me want to pull out my hair.

 

It was my son's 11th birthday. We organized an ice cream cake at Swensen's at the shopping mall his friends and him hangout at every Saturday. He chose a 3lb chocolate ice cream cake, and arranged with his friends to meet him here at the specified time. More than enough for the 7 or 8 of his friends that showed up. First came one of their mothers, a loud busybody that never shuts up, straight away she was into dragging my son to the fridge to go through all the different cakes even though he had already chosen it. Then going through the entire menu with him even though he had already chosen it. Every one sits down, the plates and glasses of water arrive, everyone is chatting and laughing. The busybody comes down with the menus and is in everyone's face going through every page getting them to order sundae's etc. There's a big ice cream cake coming, why not just sit down and shut up. She's making them choose then double choose then triple choose pointing out extras. Everyone's settled and laughing and joking and then she declares we're going to move tables to the slightly wider table behind. Everyone has their bags and toys and phones and plates and glasses of water out on the table already, most don't even hear her because they're in the zone. She forces everyone up to move to the other table. The sundaes she made everyone order even though the big cake was ordered and coming started arriving and she was up trying to organize who gets what and what extras do they they want, maybe add this, maybe add that why not get this too etc just sit down and shut up. Each kid gets a big slice of the 3lb cake and loves it, none can finish the slice of cake and their sundae, of course. 

 

It came to the end and I got up to pay and told the waitress to bill me for the only the cake. Of course this simple request almost melted the minds, brains and computer system in the store and took 10 minutes and numerous managers and staff to figure out. 

 

I paid the 800 baht for the cake and left, leaving the rest of the 1,700 baht bill for the busybody motormouth to take care of. Maybe next time she'll sit down and shut up and let everybody enjoy their own time. 

 

It's now going round on group chat's that my son's father is tight and stingy and not good. 

 

 

Thailand. 

I am generally a fairly patient and tolerant person, but there does come a point where somebody 's behavior is so far over the line action needs to be taken. I would have asked my son if it was okay if I kicked out the woman and her son, and assuming my son was okay with that I would have asked her to politely leave and take her son with her. She had revoked her right to be in the room . Leave now, your level of obnoxiousness is beyond tolerable, goodbye. 

 

Glad you only paid for the cake that was the right thing to do, sometimes shame and shock is the only thing numskulls respond to. 

 

 

[J Branche]

What is this nonsense the person inviting people pays for everything?

 

I've seen many all contribute to bills at clubs.

 

They see Rich Foreigner and say "Jackpot" and want to run up the bill freely with no concern for prices.

 

Depending on the situation I have done the same thing.  The girlfriend and all her friends know what's up now

[ChrisKC]

17 hours ago, MalcolmB said:

Gee I feel sorry for the birthday boy. How embarrassing.

if you couldn’t afford it you should have told them.

All over £35

Thank goodness this comment is in the minority - as I would guess from you!

[Snackbar]

555

 

This is gonna cots ya. D Brent.

[Presnock]

On 4/2/2025 at 12:33 PM, Packer said:

But sometimes Thais make me want to pull out my hair.

 

It was my son's 11th birthday. We organized an ice cream cake at Swensen's at the shopping mall his friends and him hangout at every Saturday. He chose a 3lb chocolate ice cream cake, and arranged with his friends to meet him here at the specified time. More than enough for the 7 or 8 of his friends that showed up. First came one of their mothers, a loud busybody that never shuts up, straight away she was into dragging my son to the fridge to go through all the different cakes even though he had already chosen it. Then going through the entire menu with him even though he had already chosen it. Every one sits down, the plates and glasses of water arrive, everyone is chatting and laughing. The busybody comes down with the menus and is in everyone's face going through every page getting them to order sundae's etc. There's a big ice cream cake coming, why not just sit down and shut up. She's making them choose then double choose then triple choose pointing out extras. Everyone's settled and laughing and joking and then she declares we're going to move tables to the slightly wider table behind. Everyone has their bags and toys and phones and plates and glasses of water out on the table already, most don't even hear her because they're in the zone. She forces everyone up to move to the other table. The sundaes she made everyone order even though the big cake was ordered and coming started arriving and she was up trying to organize who gets what and what extras do they they want, maybe add this, maybe add that why not get this too etc just sit down and shut up. Each kid gets a big slice of the 3lb cake and loves it, none can finish the slice of cake and their sundae, of course. 

 

It came to the end and I got up to pay and told the waitress to bill me for the only the cake. Of course this simple request almost melted the minds, brains and computer system in the store and took 10 minutes and numerous managers and staff to figure out. 

 

I paid the 800 baht for the cake and left, leaving the rest of the 1,700 baht bill for the busybody motormouth to take care of. Maybe next time she'll sit down and shut up and let everybody enjoy their own time. 

 

It's now going round on group chat's that my son's father is tight and stingy and not good. 

 

 

Thailand. 

I would not have sat there and put up with someone coming to my child's party and then trying to take over the party.  I would have advised her that everything she ordered after what I had arranged would be paid by her as her gift to my child if she continued with her plan.

[richard_smith237]

33 minutes ago, J Branche said:

What is this nonsense the person inviting people pays for everything?

 

it’s not nonsense - it’s quite the norm.

 

Two hours at Bowling or at Top Golf, 3 or 4 lanes, food, a couple of beer towers for the Dads etc…. All normal…

 

Unless someone takes the pish & stats ordering cocktails & topshelf etc…

 

B’day boy usually gets some decent presents !! 

 

 

33 minutes ago, J Branche said:

I've seen many all contribute to bills at clubs.

 

They see Rich Foreigner and say "Jackpot" and want to run up the bill freely with no concern for prices.
 

Not as I’ve seen at all - but thus seems to be the op’s experience from a single person. 

 

33 minutes ago, J Branche said:

Depending on the situation I have done the same thing.  The girlfriend and all her friends know what's up now

 

[Atlantic Cod]

Thailand the Land of Fussing....well done for only paying your part!

Thais love to judge everyone, you try and judge them or their business and they pull out the defamation card, or sulk, or both...

[CallumWK]

1 hour ago, ColeBOzbourne said:

My mom died two years before I was born. I never had a dad. I had one spoon of dry rice every morning, just to ease the hunger pains. Then some warm water for lunch to make the rice swell up. Udder than that I didn't have nuffin'. 

 

At least your BS is funnier than Ralf's BS

[Thingamabob]

Why did you not take control the moment the loudmouth started to interfere ?

[PJ71]

2 hours ago, cdemundo said:

As I said "Sounds like the lady was an annoying old hen and I understand your desire to stick it to her.."

Pervert.

[BangkokHank]

The busybody woman was clearly trying to appear to be a generous hostess - at YOUR expense. You did the right thing by not allowing it. And you might have even taught her a lesson.

[MalcolmB]

2 hours ago, ChrisKC said:

Thank goodness this comment is in the minority - as I would guess from you!

I am many things but I am not a tight. I am not sure if I actually am in the minority? Sounds like everyone who was there on the chat group feels similar.
Son’s 11th birthday. 
christ. 
watch nobody show up to his 12 th birthday. 

[Packer]

Turns out most of the group chat members (Thai) have blocked her 555

[Davedub]

20 hours ago, scorecard said:

 

Another angle - I wouldn't just pay the 800 and leave the bill for the balance of 900 unpaid.

 

Why? at that moment in time and later for quite a while my son would have been horrified about how he and me would be badmouthed. I wouldn't put my son in that situation. 

 

 

It seems to me that if the OP had paid then his son would be in the position of having seen his father haplessly going along for the sake of getting along. 

I think the son witnessed an excellent lesson in maintaining boundaries and maintaining self respect. Learning that part of that process is that when you stand up to people they may bad mouth you is also a valuable lesson.

[Mason45]

Years ago when I lived in my Bangkok town house my wife's' 10 years old grand son used to stay with us every weekend. So every Saturday evening my wife used to make french fries for her grand son and his friends and supply them with bottles of Coke. I used to sit out the front with an ice box full of beer. This was going well until a mob  of teenagers arrived all covered with tatts and thought they were going to take over the party. So I calmly walked back inside and picked up my shot gun with that my wife told them that I had killed before using that same shot gun. I never seen guys run so fast especially as they all thought they were Thai muscle men. There were never any repercussions as my wife told them the shot gun is always ready for trouble makers.

[4MyEgo]

20 hours ago, MalcolmB said:

Forum has just set a new low.

Packers sons birthday party went over budget by about £1 per head and he refused to pay it. 
and he was cheered on by five others.

i spend about triple that just on myself on an average night out. 
Luckily they were drinking water at this event.
 

 

It appears this all went over your head.

 

I could have easily paid, however I appreciate Packers stance, in other words, if you allow others to take control, your weak, nothing to do with $'s.

 

Spend up big MalcolmB, your purgative, however, you would have been the laughing stock, weak in my opinion, what Packer did was show that he wasn't going to allow some biatch to take control of HIS son's birthday party and if she wanted to be a show pony, then she can pay for it, otherwise why would she be stabbing him in the back. 

[Kinok Farang]

On 4/2/2025 at 12:33 PM, Packer said:

But sometimes Thais make me want to pull out my hair.

 

It was my son's 11th birthday. We organized an ice cream cake at Swensen's at the shopping mall his friends and him hangout at every Saturday. He chose a 3lb chocolate ice cream cake, and arranged with his friends to meet him here at the specified time. More than enough for the 7 or 8 of his friends that showed up. First came one of their mothers, a loud busybody that never shuts up, straight away she was into dragging my son to the fridge to go through all the different cakes even though he had already chosen it. Then going through the entire menu with him even though he had already chosen it. Every one sits down, the plates and glasses of water arrive, everyone is chatting and laughing. The busybody comes down with the menus and is in everyone's face going through every page getting them to order sundae's etc. There's a big ice cream cake coming, why not just sit down and shut up. She's making them choose then double choose then triple choose pointing out extras. Everyone's settled and laughing and joking and then she declares we're going to move tables to the slightly wider table behind. Everyone has their bags and toys and phones and plates and glasses of water out on the table already, most don't even hear her because they're in the zone. She forces everyone up to move to the other table. The sundaes she made everyone order even though the big cake was ordered and coming started arriving and she was up trying to organize who gets what and what extras do they they want, maybe add this, maybe add that why not get this too etc just sit down and shut up. Each kid gets a big slice of the 3lb cake and loves it, none can finish the slice of cake and their sundae, of course. 

 

It came to the end and I got up to pay and told the waitress to bill me for the only the cake. Of course this simple request almost melted the minds, brains and computer system in the store and took 10 minutes and numerous managers and staff to figure out. 

 

I paid the 800 baht for the cake and left, leaving the rest of the 1,700 baht bill for the busybody motormouth to take care of. Maybe next time she'll sit down and shut up and let everybody enjoy their own time. 

 

It's now going round on group chat's that my son's father is tight and stingy and not good. 

 

 

Thailand. 

Hahahaha,brilliant.Just the kind of mess i usually get myself into.I sympathise pal.