Parental neglect

[sead]

So i am dating a girl who is taking car of her siblings. 14,9 and 6 years old. Her mother has moved away from Pattaya with a new man. Her mother has a job. her mother has cut all ties with her children. her oldest daughter is taking care of them. So here comes some questions. Now please understand that this is info i got and it can also just be false information for several reasons. Daughter is paying school, food and they all stay in a cheap studio.

Does the mother have any plight to take care of her children?

Is the mother obliged to support her oldest daughter for taking care of the siblings?

The mother demands 50000 thb from oldest daughter to take back her children so she can open a nail saloon. If that is the case can the mother again just neglect her children.

 

Thank you for some clarification

[bkk6060]

Mom probably thinks since her daughter is with you, she has plenty of money to take care of those kids.

Good luck getting anywhere on neglect charges.

[sead]

3 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Mom probably thinks since her daughter is with you, she has plenty of money to take care of those kids.

Good luck getting anywhere on neglect charges.

Mom doesnt know about me, And gf also told me that if she knew she would only ask for more. I wondered if someone knew the law and if possible if the government would retract from mothers salary. I do know i am in thatiland and that theres little chance

 

[Gsxrnz]

What you describe is known as the Thai Social Welfare System.

 

If you're the one left with the baby, then you're the one left with the baby. 

 

Next step is to locate the grandparents and dump the grandkids with them.  

[Quentin Zen]

38 minutes ago, sead said:

So i am dating a girl

The fact that you didn't say woman is mildly infuriating.  

[sead]

1 minute ago, Quentin Zen said:

The fact that you didn't say woman is mildly infuriating.  

even a 50 year old wants to be called a girl in 2025

 

[fredwiggy]

18 minutes ago, Gsxrnz said:

What you describe is known as the Thai Social Welfare System.

 

If you're the one left with the baby, then you're the one left with the baby. 

 

Next step is to locate the grandparents and dump the grandkids with them.  

Which happens 1/3 plus of the time here and is one reason so many children end up wayward here. It's the parents job to raise the children, but has become accepted to let grandma take care of them while mom disappears and sees them maybe twice a year, making just enough money in the large cities to take care of her alone, with the added expense of higher rent. Of course the dad is long gone and isn't going to help so that's what creates the excuse. To the OP, you aren't going to change what is, but if you want to stay with this woman, you'll need to accept those kids being there and forget about any help from their mother. Once that mother gets that 50K, those kids will be sent away again, of course to grandma or whoever else.

[SAFETY FIRST]

1 hour ago, sead said:

So i am dating a girl who is taking car of her siblings. 14,9 and 6 years old

The mother demands 50000 thb from oldest daughter 

1. How old is the girl you are dating? 

2. The eldest daughter is your gf? If not how old is the eldest daughter? 

[brewsterbudgen]

Not an unusual situation in Thailand.  Unless you decide to make your relationship with the daughter more permanent, rather than just dating, I'd stay well out of it.  

[Cameroni]

3 hours ago, sead said:

So i am dating a girl who is taking car of her siblings. 14,9 and 6 years old. Her mother has moved away from Pattaya with a new man. Her mother has a job. her mother has cut all ties with her children. her oldest daughter is taking care of them. So here comes some questions. Now please understand that this is info i got and it can also just be false information for several reasons. Daughter is paying school, food and they all stay in a cheap studio.

Does the mother have any plight to take care of her children?

Is the mother obliged to support her oldest daughter for taking care of the siblings?

The mother demands 50000 thb from oldest daughter to take back her children so she can open a nail saloon. If that is the case can the mother again just neglect her children.

 

Thank you for some clarification

 

I am utterly stunned by the shameless manner in which Thai mothers try to extort money from their daughters. I have a similar situation where a mother left a girl to be raised by the grandmother and is now demanding this daughter pay her rent and electricity. And the daughter does it. It's almost unbelievable what goes on here. 

[MalcolmB]

2 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

Of course the dad is long gone

Not everyone is like you thread.

Most Thai males stay with the wife and family.

That is what real men do.

[fredwiggy]

4 minutes ago, MalcolmB said:

Not everyone is like you thread.

Most Thai males stay with the wife and family.

That is what real men do.

A real man stays with around his children, especially if the woman isn't capable. many locals have absent fathers , which is why there is so much crime in juveniles here, along with most everywhere else. I had custody of my children, as I will have full with this one, as I'm the only real parent they've had. Again, stick to things you know about, which doesn't include children and wives, aka families.

[MalcolmB]

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

A real man stays with around his children, especially if the woman isn't capable. many locals have absent fathers , which is why there is so much crime in juveniles here, along with most everywhere else. I had custody of my children, as I will have full with this one, as I'm the only real parent they've had. Again, stick to things you know about, which doesn't include children and wives, aka families.

I don’t think living with an elderly illiterate single parent is the answer.

How could that parent speak with teachers, read school notices and help the child with homework.

It is very sad.

You keep harping on about Thai kids being raised by often illiterate grandparents. But if you are 70 and the child is 12 what is the difference?
 

You lack of awareness is so cute.

[NanLaew]

4 hours ago, sead said:

4 hours ago, Quentin Zen said:

The fact that you didn't say woman is mildly infuriating.  

even a 50 year old wants to be called a girl in 2025

 

Well played that man.

[newbee2022]

5 hours ago, sead said:

So i am dating a girl who is taking car of her siblings. 14,9 and 6 years old. Her mother has moved away from Pattaya with a new man. Her mother has a job. her mother has cut all ties with her children. her oldest daughter is taking care of them. So here comes some questions. Now please understand that this is info i got and it can also just be false information for several reasons. Daughter is paying school, food and they all stay in a cheap studio.

Does the mother have any plight to take care of her children?

Is the mother obliged to support her oldest daughter for taking care of the siblings?

The mother demands 50000 thb from oldest daughter to take back her children so she can open a nail saloon. If that is the case can the mother again just neglect her children.

 

Thank you for some clarification

Maybe these kids belong to your "girl"? (How old is she?).

And "mother's"? demand for 50.000 Baht will be shared probably between your "girl" and somebody else. Her boyfriend? 

Anyway they exploit and use you.

Good luck😂

[baansgr]

The Mother can do what she wants until the kids are 20 years old. Can abandon them by going to a foreign country and you can't do a thing about it.... 

[MadAtMatrix]

On 7/1/2025 at 5:54 AM, sead said:

So i am dating a girl who is taking car of her siblings. 14,9 and 6 years old. Her mother has moved away from Pattaya with a new man. Her mother has a job. her mother has cut all ties with her children. her oldest daughter is taking care of them. So here comes some questions. Now please understand that this is info i got and it can also just be false information for several reasons. Daughter is paying school, food and they all stay in a cheap studio.

Does the mother have any plight to take care of her children?

Is the mother obliged to support her oldest daughter for taking care of the siblings?

The mother demands 50000 thb from oldest daughter to take back her children so she can open a nail saloon. If that is the case can the mother again just neglect her children.

 

Thank you for some clarification

Like Thailand needs ANOTHER nail salon……. the money would get straight onto her online slots game while she sits around doing nothing 

[Jimjim1]

On 7/1/2025 at 12:33 AM, Quentin Zen said:

The fact that you didn't say woman is mildly infuriating.  

I would say disturbing especially as he talks of a 14 year old child and no further mention of age other than girl, not woman or lady.

[FritsSikkink]

On 7/1/2025 at 6:19 AM, sead said:

Mom doesnt know about me, And gf also told me that if she knew she would only ask for more. I wondered if someone knew the law and if possible if the government would retract from mothers salary. I do know i am in thatiland and that theres little chance

 

If you stay with the girl, you are stuck with the children or they go to a care home. Mother won't take them back, you will be out of 50K OR she gets the 50K, takes the kids and threatens to dump them back after a bit and asks for more money. 

[fredwiggy]

On 7/1/2025 at 9:11 AM, MalcolmB said:

I don’t think living with an elderly illiterate single parent is the answer.

How could that parent speak with teachers, read school notices and help the child with homework.

It is very sad.

You keep harping on about Thai kids being raised by often illiterate grandparents. But if you are 70 and the child is 12 what is the difference?
 

You lack of awareness is so cute.

You have to be the most ignorant adult I've ever come across, as I've never come across as illiterate and have proven you wrong every time. Your assumptions show your lack of intelligence and restraint, as adults don't assume anywhere near like you do. If you're referring to me being illiterate because I can't speak or read Thai, that's yet another mindless reply from you.

 

Are you that dense that you don't understand people usually get smarter with age, especially if they are readers, and their wisdom also increases. Besides those like you it seems. If you've been  a parent when you were younger, you're just as good or a better parent when you're older. All my children did well in school. I was there to help them with their homework, school meetings, and I'm the one who basically taught them the most important things in life from the beginning.

 

Do you not understand the difference between the intelligence of locals, who are for the most part farmers and laborers here, and someone who was born in New Jersey, a state well known for it's good schools and highly intelligent students, someone who's been a constant reader since high school and someone who started out with a well above average IQ?

 

Being 68 doesn't have any bearing on how much anyone knows, nor how smart they are. It has to do with genetics, desire and being one who has read all their life. Look at you. You're younger than I, middle aged,  and will never have near the intelligence I had when I was still in high school. I'm light years more aware then you'll ever be Malcy, regarding women, children, psychology and probably everything else, but that's something that will continue to pass over your head because you've been stunted by a lack of life experience and parents who never taught you much besides use women. Stop commenting on things you know nothing about, as it makes you look more dense with each reply.

[MalcolmB]

30 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

I was there to help them with their homework,

How can you possibly help with your daughters homework if you can’t read it.

 

You can try and kid others Fred, but don’t kid yourself.

[SAFETY FIRST]

On 7/1/2025 at 5:54 AM, sead said:

can also just be false information for several reasons

Obviously false information and a fake post. 

 

The OP has disappeared, not answering the many questions. 

 

 

[fredwiggy]

Just now, MalcolmB said:

How can you possibly help with your daughters homework if you can’t read it.

 

You can try and kid others Fred, but don’t kid yourself.

When we're back in the US, her homework will be easy for me to help with, as I've been there before countless times. I help here here with her math homework, the only course which is necessary, as learning anything else in Thai is useless for her future and will be long forgotten once she's enrolled in a normal English school in Texas, a place she can shine, end up in college and make more money in a week than most do here in a month.

 

Like I mentioned, better to stay away from things you can't possibly understand. You have no children, wife or anything resembling a normal lifestyle. You drink a lot, which is ruining what brain cells you might have left, and pay for sex, which makes you an expert on nothing resembling a normal man-woman relationship.

 

The only things you know about children or a marriage you learned from parents who again, never taught you respect for others, basic skills being a man relating to a normal women, nor how a normal family operates. Your constant assumptions point this fact out every day, with you actually thinking you know more than a person that's been there 30 years longer than you,  raising children all that time when you've done none of this. 

[MalcolmB]

4 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I was there to help them with their homework,

 

4 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I help here here with her math homework, the only course which is necessary

 
So only help with maths homework and not the other 8 subjects. 

[Celsius]

I just noticed posts are way funnier when you DON'T live in Thailand. 

[fredwiggy]

• •  

Posted 16 minutes ago

5 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I was there to help them with their homework,

 

4 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

I help here here with her math homework, the only course which is necessary

 
So only help with maths homework and not the other 8 subjects. ..................................Did you not read where I said "the only course which is necessary? I do help her with her English work also, but seeing that they're English teaching here is very poor at best, it's better that she hears me speak and teaches her English grammar, words  and sentences and talking to her while we watch only English movies and series so she can understand how to pronounce words correctly.

 

What she learns here again, will be put by the wayside as she won't need it in the US as every subject there will be 100% English spoken, written and read. I also help her with teaching her about music, meaning the best of music which I'm very passionate about and have knowledge of. She doesn't need help with physical education as it's only the kids running around playing at her school without a gym class. The other subjects, again, will be forgotten when she is enrolled in a school in the US.  

[Magictoad]

plight?! Or right

The situation you describe is VERY common in Thailand where there is no welfare system. 

[TedG]

There is no concept of child support in Thailand.

 

Old people do receive 600 bath from the government, if they live to 90 they can receive 1000 baht per month.   

 

The daughter is expected to provide for the aging parents.   Which means she ends up hooking for a living.

 

 

[MalcolmB]

3 hours ago, fredwiggy said:

Did you not read where I said "the only course which is necessary? I do help her with her English work also, but seeing that they're English teaching here is very poor at best, it's better that she hears me speak and teaches her English grammar, words  and sentences and talking to her while we watch only English movies and series so she can understand how to pronounce words correctly.

 

Why don’t you send her to an International School?

[fredwiggy]

8 hours ago, MalcolmB said:

Why don’t you send her to an International School?

Because we'll be moving to the US where the schools and lifestyle is better than here.