im not saying that you, Samuian, are trying to impose manners on thai (or whatever) society. im posing a question about westerners in general. nothing personal at all.

Understand! Don't feel/be sorry!

I don't take things easily personal, was my response regarding a couple of quotes..!

I know it is one point of view, mine and the way I deal with situations like this.

In privacy... it's something different!

Edited April 26, 200818 yr by Samuian

parsley basil and mint leaves (not after dinner mints which only work in the mouth) work in the digestive system which is why they are used in so many thai foods (the mint and the basil types)... they are a calming and cleansing aromatic oils that are used for this purpose. in italian cultures the anise and the fennel (fenucio) is used for the same purpose after meals.... u have to eat a few leaves or a stem full to get the effect but it does work...

bina

And it is still too short

Something that is quickly realized shortly after one's 40th birthday

Was going to say Happy birthday--But I see it's next month--so Happy Early Birthday to a fellow fire horse.

And it is still too short

Something that is quickly realized shortly after one's 40th birthday

Was going to say Happy birthday--But I see it's next month--so Happy Early Birthday to a fellow fire horse.

Thanks, I haven't yet started going backwards

Anyway, we all have annoying habits, and sometimes the person doesn't even realize how annoying it is. But really, I just can't comprehend that someone, in all seriousness, would consider this a huge problem. Communication and understanding is the key to every relationship and if you can't communicate your feelings and can't understand where he is coming from (and vice versa) this is more indicative of a problem than annoying habits.

Thanks for that info, bina.

Should we let this thread morph into a more general discussion of what annoys us in our partners, and what annoys our partners in us ? plus the way we deal with these.

Who'd like to start ?

This thread caught me as I also have a (Thai) husband who tends to slurp the noodles on occasion. Obviously, it's not just

a Thai thing as my (white American) father had the habit of hearty smackings as well. Once when I was a young girl and listening to my father's swishings over the dinner table I secretly swore I would never marry a man that slurped, swished or smacked. Well, here I am married to a fullblown swisher, with our first child on the way.

I don't think we can really choose what we're annoyed by, at least not without some serious work on our emotions. And although meditation has always been a want of mine, I've yet to have the willpower to sit on my ass and not do a thing other than take note of myself for any lengthy period. It's nice to say don't sweat the small stuff, but come on-- when something irks you, it irks you. It's so much easier to slough off another's annoyances as pettiness.

I think it's just a matter of expressing your annoyance. My boyfriend knows slurps irritate me, as I'll make some pretty expressive faces upon hearing those echos. So he smacks louder, I'll realize I'm silly (annoyed but silly) and his slurps will quiet (but rarely cease in full). He claims the damp orations are purely functional. They cool the noodles to an acceptable temperature, or lessen the pain of the pik kee noo's. I remain doubtful, although I have noticed inhaling while eating can lessen the bite of a particularly large mouthful of chilis.

Having said that, open expressions of annoyance aren't always the answer. My sullen teenage ass tried to tell my father to spoon his cereal more quietly. The look I received shut my mouth forever, if not his.

Edited April 26, 200818 yr by orlandoiam

I only asked a simple question no need for people to get all hot under the collar. Donna your example is ridiculous. Of course your friend would help you in hospital. I am talking about sucking fish heads, bones, picking teeth at the table etc. I merely wondered how others felt/dealt with this

what my ridiculous example was getting at, nampeung, was the noises that were made in the bathroom in the morning, not disputing the fact that she was helping me in hospital.

when it comes to eating noises, i dont particularly like them, but i deal with it. in the west we are taught to eat quietly, in other countries they are taught to eat noisily. if eating noises are the only problem that you have with your partner, then i would say you are a very lucky woman indeed. i bet many a person who has lost a loved one would gladly put up with their eating noises again given the chance.

what i am saying is that this is such a small thing to get annoyed at. try to see it through new eyes and embrace it. join in sometimes. you may just enjoy it!