Ignorant, Stupid Fool?

[Moonrakers]

OK,

My 3 1/2 yr old daughter is suffering from epilepsy and has seizures fairly often.

The other day some idiot from our apartment block said to my wife: "Why do you keep letting your daughter have fits, are you not worried that it might damage her brain".

I mean really, what a stupid ignorant thing to say, blatantly insinuating that my wife and I don't care enough about our daughter and that we are neglecting our daughter by "allowing" this to happen.

I wasn't there at the time it was said and have decided to leave it, but I know that if it is said again in my prescence then I am very likely to react in a very strong manner.

What would you do in this situation? I know that the best option is likely to be to leave it as this person is clearly very very stupid, but I am sure that I will not be able to keep my cool and it is quite upsetting.

Anybody?

P.S. this person is Thai, which may well be relevant for cultural reasons (I am individual bashing, not Thai bashing)

[kmart]

Ignorant, Stupid C*nt.

Not enough thread titles like this one, imo.

Good look to you and your family, don't let some dummy give you an ulcer.

[MSingh]

OK,

My 3 1/2 yr old daughter is suffering from epilepsy and has seizures fairly often.

The other day some idiot from our apartment block said to my wife: "Why do you keep letting your daughter have fits, are you not worried that it might damage her brain".

I mean really, what a stupid ignorant thing to say, blatantly insinuating that my wife and I don't care enough about our daughter and that we are neglecting our daughter by "allowing" this to happen.

I wasn't there at the time it was said and have decided to leave it, but I know that if it is said again in my prescence then I am very likely to react in a very strong manner.

What would you do in this situation? I know that the best option is likely to be to leave it as this person is clearly very very stupid, but I am sure that I will not be able to keep my cool and it is quite upsetting.

Anybody?

P.S. this person is Thai, which may well be relevant for cultural reasons (I am individual bashing, not Thai bashing)

You really didn't have to post the last bit, form the first sentence i knew that already..It is quite upsetting & actually outrageous, but the Person who said it is a stupid <deleted> like you said, giveing him/her a right hander or verbals isn't going to make any difference at all in their way of thinking unfortunately...

[Prakanong]

Nothing you can do about uneducated ignorant fools like these unless you want to become a teacher and change the world.

I think its best to ignore them.

The sad fact is 30+ years ago it might have been said in the west too but I hope, in the main, we have more knowledge and awareness of these things now - Thailand might catch up eventually. You are dealing with a very supersticious not at all modern society that no amount of Merc's and million dollar condo's can cure instantly

Edited July 3, 2008 by Prakanong

[nonthaburial]

Just feel sorry for the guys ignorance. ignore him and move on with life.

[Moonrakers]

My brain tells me to leave it, as suggested but my heart tells me to give some back.

I am thinking of a controlled yet very public verbal display, I don't expect to achieve anything by it except for making this person lose face.

She is a woman by the way.

[A_Traveller]

Sorry to read this, but why not get off the fence and say what you mean when you entitle a thread

Regards

[Payboy]

no amount of Merc's and million dollar condo's can cure instantly

rather an ignorant fool living in a million dollar condo and driving a merc, than just an ignorant fool....

[Prakanong]

My brain tells me to leave it, as suggested but my heart tells me to give some back.

I am thinking of a controlled yet very public verbal display, I don't expect to achieve anything by it except for making this person lose face.

She is a woman by the way.

Make a comment about the shitty education system that she must have gone through to be this ay and say how you feel sorry for her being so ignorant - it must have a devastating effect on her quality of life.

Thank her for her concern but its her brain she should worry about!

[Prakanong]

no amount of Merc's and million dollar condo's can cure instantly

rather an ignorant fool living in a million dollar condo and driving a merc, than just an ignorant fool....

So which are you?

I am a right clever bastard living in a million dollar condo ;-)

Edited July 3, 2008 by Prakanong

[Old Croc]

I don't often bother reading these whinge about anything threads, but the title of this one caught my eye.

[Jefferson]

I think the original poster is WAY out of line with this.

1: No harm or ill will was intended on the part of the person making the comment. Not having intimate knowledge of all medical conditions is not a crime. If anything, she/he spoke out because of care and concern about your daughter. The world needs more people showing care and concern.

2: Instead of educating the person about your daughters condition, you choose to whine about it on an internet forum. That is not very productive.

3: The topic title is very offensive.

Honestly it all says a lot more about the original poster than about the incident, or indeed the person making the comment.

Edited July 3, 2008 by Jefferson

[Payboy]

no amount of Merc's and million dollar condo's can cure instantly

rather an ignorant fool living in a million dollar condo and driving a merc, than just an ignorant fool....

So which are you?

I am a right clever bastard living in a million dollar condo ;-)

pulled the blood from your brain didn't it...?

[samran]

give them an info sheet on epilepsy, preferably in Thai. That person may have been ignorant, but I suspect he/she was showing a iota of concern in at least asking about it.

Woken up to the concern and the ins-and-outs of it all, you might have a new best friend, and importantly, someone who knows a little more about it.

[huggybear]

I think the original poster is WAY out of line with this.

1: No harm or ill will was intended on the part fo the person making the comment. Not having intimate knowledge of all medical conditions is not a crime. If anything, he spoke out because of care and concern about your daughter.

2: The topic title is very offensive.

Honestly it all says a lot more about the original poster than about the incident, or indeed the person making the comment.

I agree.

OP is over-reacting due to the personal nature of the problem. I'm sorry for the poster and the epilepsy for which his daughter is afflicted, wouldn't wish that upon anybody but I think the emotional charge that has him wound up over somebody's absurd comment is misplaced anger. I don't blame the OP. I would be angry too if my little baby was sick like that.

OP best of luck with the situation and I hope your daughter can get the right kind of medication and live a long fulfilling life.

[Tywais]

give them an info sheet on epilepsy, preferably in Thai.

Good advise. It sounds more an issue of not knowing it is a medical problem then being insensitive intentionally.

[Prakanong]

no amount of Merc's and million dollar condo's can cure instantly

rather an ignorant fool living in a million dollar condo and driving a merc, than just an ignorant fool....

So which are you?

I am a right clever bastard living in a million dollar condo ;-)

pulled the blood from your brain didn't it...?

Not really - takes more than that - usually

Made me think about why i never learned to drive though

[sylviex]

Perhaps you could find some literature on the topic in Thai and leave it in his/her letterbox. Or have your wife give a brief explanation of the facts. (How did she react ? Did she ask what you were supposed to be doing ? -- might be interesting.)

I understand that would be maddening.

Some cultures/religions, both eastern and western, hold rather "interesting" beliefs about seizures. For example :

In her book, The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down, Anne Fadiman tells the story of Lia Lee, a young Hmong girl whose epilepsy was diagnosed in Merced, California. The title of Ms. Fadiman's book describes the Hmong translation of the word "epilepsy." Ms. Fadiman writes about the treatments recommended for Lia by her doctors in California and the conflicts that arose between this Western medical approach and the traditional Hmong cultural beliefs about epilepsy adhered to by Lia's parents.

epilepsy.com/articles/ar_1063680870

Check out "Discrimination and epilepsy in Thailand".neurology-asia.org/articles/20043_049.pdf

Have a bit of a google; might help you see where this person is coming from.

While your reaction is completely understandable, letting your daughter sense it might not be in her best interests. When she gets older, she will have to deal with any ignorance/nastiness herself, and a "jai yen yen" attitude might serve her best.

When she attends kindergarten/school you may need to have a chat with her teachers.

Edited July 3, 2008 by sylviex

[Tywais]

Also Epilepsy Society of Thailand may have information you can show them.

[roygsd]

OK,

My 3 1/2 yr old daughter is suffering from epilepsy and has seizures fairly often.

The other day some idiot from our apartment block said to my wife: "Why do you keep letting your daughter have fits, are you not worried that it might damage her brain".

I mean really, what a stupid ignorant thing to say, blatantly insinuating that my wife and I don't care enough about our daughter and that we are neglecting our daughter by "allowing" this to happen.

I wasn't there at the time it was said and have decided to leave it, but I know that if it is said again in my prescence then I am very likely to react in a very strong manner.

What would you do in this situation? I know that the best option is likely to be to leave it as this person is clearly very very stupid, but I am sure that I will not be able to keep my cool and it is quite upsetting.

Anybody?

P.S. this person is Thai, which may well be relevant for cultural reasons (I am individual bashing, not Thai bashing)

Hi,

Sorry to read of your daughters illness and even sorrier to hear of you recent experience with your neighbour.

The world is full of <deleted>, I am afraid this is unlikey the last one you will come across in LOS.

My wife has a younger sister who contracted meningitis at the age of 7, the f..king old crow next door told her mother that she had done something very bad in her past life for this to happen!!!!!!!!

Years later it still makes my blood boil!

It is remarkable how thai's appear to consider disability as something to be hidden away, I dont think this is entirely down to

lack of education as it seems to be at all levels of thai society.

I just know that your blood pressure is up and not going to reduce until you say something to the prick, dont waste your breath trying to "educate him" you are likely wasting your breath.

I think I would have been inclined to tell him I allow my daughter to have these fits as it is preferable to my previous hobby of throwing small minded <deleted>'s off the high balconies or something very similar.

I am sure this will not change his views but you will have left him in no doubt that he would be wise to avoid you and more importantly commenting on your daughter condition.

I have no personal experience of epilepsy but I understand that in recent years research has come on leaps and bounds, I m aware that sufferers of parkinson's disease have been encouraged by a " new" operation that is coming into use which appears to stop the main symptom's.

Best wishes to you and yours, keep your chin up and dont let this incident get under your skin

roy gsd

[sylviex]

Woken up to the concern and the ins-and-outs of it all, you might have a new best friend, and importantly, someone who knows a little more about it.

That occurred to me, too. And she would quite likely pass the information to other neighbours, which would surely be a good thing.

[roygsd]

:

I don't often bother reading these whinge about anything threads, but the title of this one caught my eye.

AND?

[Moonrakers]

I think the original poster is WAY out of line with this.

1: No harm or ill will was intended on the part of the person making the comment. Not having intimate knowledge of all medical conditions is not a crime. If anything, she/he spoke out because of care and concern about your daughter. The world needs more people showing care and concern.

2: Instead of educating the person about your daughters condition, you choose to whine about it on an internet forum. That is not very productive.

3: The topic title is very offensive.

Honestly it all says a lot more about the original poster than about the incident, or indeed the person making the comment.

1: This persons actions, whether intentional or not, upset my wife a great deal and I am within my rights to put a stop to it if possible. If she was that concerned about my daughter then why does she not offer help or find out more. And how does accusing my wife and I of neglect help anything.

2: This whole thread is about me looking for advice on how to deal with this, which could prove to be productive depending on the advice that I am given.

3: Thank you for claryfing the offensiveness of the title, as that was my intention.

(Mods, please feel free to edit the title if I have over-stepped the mark), however I stick by it because I mean it.

[JOHN2]

I think the original poster is WAY out of line with this.

1: No harm or ill will was intended on the part of the person making the comment. Not having intimate knowledge of all medical conditions is not a crime. If anything, she/he spoke out because of care and concern about your daughter. The world needs more people showing care and concern.

2: Instead of educating the person about your daughters condition, you choose to whine about it on an internet forum. That is not very productive.

3: The topic title is very offensive.

Honestly it all says a lot more about the original poster than about the incident, or indeed the person making the comment.

Get down off your high horse Jefferson and stop spouting nonsence.The woman was well out of order and would have got a deserved rocket if she had said that about my child and why are you so sure quote 'no harm or ill was intented on the part of the person making the comment'

Was you there then??

[TheDon]

Maybe you should educate her. Maybe she has no idea what sickness she has. As im sure alot of people have no idea what it is.

Better try that then keep getting all worked up about it

[TAWP]

People who claimed the woman showed care for the daughter must be new here. Or expats living outside Thailand.

Seeing the same kind of ignorance from both family, relatives and others up close - regarding often anything about raising kids or anything medical - they actually think they are correct and are saying it to nag, not to help.

If she was interested in helping she would have approached the subject differently since she practically made his wife lose face [-tried to].

[samran]

have changed the title as it detracts from an otherwise important issue.

Mr T used the word 'fool' quite strongly. If it is good enough for Mr T, then it is good enough for Thai Visa.....

[dr_Pat_Pong]

roygsd's intemperate response is dumped.

[samran]

People who claimed the woman showed care for the daughter must be new here. Or expats living outside Thailand.

Seeing the same kind of ignorance from both family, relatives and others up close - regarding often anything about raising kids or anything medical - they actually think they are correct and are saying it to nag, not to help.

If she was interested in helping she would have approached the subject differently since she practically made his wife lose face [-tried to].

I've got very ignorant, and yet very helpful Thai-Chinese aunties. They live in their own old world and understand very little about what they don't already know. To hear them speak sometimes makes you cringe...but there you go.

But to a person, when actually confronted with a situation, their compassion can be enourmous - when it is at a personal level (though a street beggar doesn't get much sympathy from all of them).

So, lets not compare penis sizes about how long we've been here or not been here, and maybe try to be a bit constructive?

[JOHN2]

Roy -bang on mate!

Jefferson is indeed a stuck up fool,i can only assume he has no children.

An as for taking time out to 'educate' the woman??? I had to read that 3 times as i thought my eyes were deceiving me.