Poll: Would Your Wife's History Affect Your Decision To Remain "faithful"

[henrytuttle]

I was reading a post by neeranam (Have you been faithful to your Thai wife) and found it interesting. But what I found more interesting was how relevant her history was.

I wouldn't be surprised if most guys were faithful to their Thai wives that they married right out of University and were their first lovers. I wouldn't be surprised if they were faithful if they were uneducated divorced village girls who they met while doing relief work. But, honestly, I'd be surprised to find too many who were completely faithful to girls they picked up in bars, massage parlours, etc.

When I say faithful, I mean stuff that you'd be upset if you found out your fourteen year old daughter was doing.

Of course, this also assumes that you live in or spend significant time in Thailand. As one poster mentioned, he'd been faithful for one year, 10 months, 23 days... or something... and this is how long he'd been out of Thailand. I'd be a little surprised to find out that being in Thailand didn't affect the odds of being faithful one way or another no matter who you're married to.

What do you think?

[jumnien]

If my wife were to go back to her previous professional life, working at SCB bank, I'd have to seriously consider acting out.

[simon43]

What has your wife's past history got with being faithful to her in the future? If she was a working girl before but now wants a monogamous relationship, surely her past is not reason to cheat on her?

Before I married, I played around a lot with working girls, but after meeting my partner I ended this fun(!). Is my past reason for my partner to be unfaithful to me?

Remember that you cannot change the past, but you can affect what happens in the future.

Simon

[HDRIDER]

Hi Mr

What are you up to? Every time you post something there is BG involved.

[tuky]

What has your wife's past history got with being faithful to her in the future?

Perhaps her history coincides with his history.

You know the old saying "you can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl"?

Perhaps that can apply to us blokes too?

[britmaveric]

Should a husband's history be relevant to his wife remaining faithful? Must admit very suspicious of the OP, seems he's more concerned with every one else's relationship, but his own.

[Heng]

People will use all kinds of things as an excuse.

I know I do (mine is: sexual monogamy stifles one's competitive drive).

[cynthialee]

silly poll. guys here dont marry bargirls, massage parlour chicks, sex workers, etc.......

[bkkjames]

silly poll. guys here dont marry bargirls, massage parlour chicks, sex workers, etc.......

IMO, the poll should be "would your wife's history affect your decision to marry her?"

Or "would your wife's actions affect your decision to remain faithful?"

But I guess if it was a poll by Ms Cindy, it would be "Why do guys here marry hi-so girls but keep them at home, because she has never seen any farang/hiso girl couples in public?"

[GuestHouse]

This is another one of those questions that I can't see being asked about relationships any where else on the planet.

[NoSpeakIt]

guesthouse you are offically upgraded to MOTEL.

[cynthialee]

geusthouse is higher than motel. you must mean downgraded.

mr house. thailand is like no other place on the planet.

Edited July 7, 2008 by cynthialee

[mikethevigoman]

why should it matter,? i assume you would have married her out of love and the question has no relevance ,.

[poshthai]

My first reaction to this silly post is not to bother but this is a forum and thepost has not been deleted so i assume it is ok to respond to.

massage girls-- are you saying all massage girls are bad

what is the etc too,is that some sort of working girl then.

IF lady is educated you do not stray,does not make sense,and if first lover you not stray.

Mr tuttle i realy think you are on drugs or something.

[poshthai]

Uneducated divorced village girl you met doing relief.

hehehehehehehehhe that is so funny one has to giggle loudly.You do not like uneducated single village girl then.

SURELY THIS HAS GOT TO BE A WIND UP,ONE CANNOT THINK LIKE THIS

[OlRedEyes]

There is constant comment on these boards about 'uneducated Thai girls' but quite often the posts by farang here show a far greater lack of general education than any farm girl could hope to display....

[sylviex]

Which came first, the chicken or the egg ?

It's likely you'd find quite different attitudes and value systems in the men from those different groups (as categorized by wife's history ).

I think well educated*, financially independent Thai women would have far less tolerance for infidelity. I don't think they move in the beer bar circles much, so the men who do might not be expected to meet and marry them.

(*referring to formal education)

Edited July 7, 2008 by sylviex

[ClaytonSeymour]

Uneducated divorced village girl you met doing relief.

hehehehehehehehhe that is so funny one has to giggle loudly.You do not like uneducated single village girl then.

SURELY THIS HAS GOT TO BE A WIND UP,ONE CANNOT THINK LIKE THIS

From day one, I've always suspected that Mr Tuttle is a complete wind up - something just doesn't smell right.

[henrytuttle]

Uneducated divorced village girl you met doing relief.

hehehehehehehehhe that is so funny one has to giggle loudly.You do not like uneducated single village girl then.

SURELY THIS HAS GOT TO BE A WIND UP,ONE CANNOT THINK LIKE THIS

From day one, I've always suspected that Mr Tuttle is a complete wind up - something just doesn't smell right.

Actually, that was just another example. I don't think I could have listed ALL TYPES. I listed educated virgin city girl, uneducated village divorced girl, should I have mentioned all varieties of above? educated village virgin girl? uneducated city girl with two kids, a dog, and a nasty mole?

As far as my fascination with BG, when I was 19, I had a Thai BG girlfriend. We were friends for a long time. But even then, I knew that our differences would always keep us apart. I don't think her history would have allowed us to stay together even if our cultural differences wouldn't have pulled us apart.

Now that I'm considering moving to Thailand (back to actually, I lived here once when I was around 8 - I only say this because the detectives in the forum seem to keep pulling up little fragments of previous posts and using them against me - "OH, you say back now? I thought you never lived here?), I want to understand the subculture of men with their Thai friends.

And, yes, I understand not everyone's Thai girlfriend or wife used to be a "working girl." I've been trying to get realistic numbers, but I can't get any. So I'll assume about 50% of the Thai wives/girlfriends I meet used to be "working." Again, if I'm wrong, I'm happy to get that information. For now, I just make my conclusion based on the behavior of the girl in question.

I'm really not trying to insult anyone. I just want to understand how the relationships between men and their Thai wives and girlfriends.

As people have mentioned in the replies, Thailand is different. In another country, these questions would not come up. And as much as it seems to ruffle feathers, it's a part of life here - if not yours, then certainly somebody's.

What I'm trying to establish here is how the guy I meet in Thailand thinks of his relationship with his wife. I think I've been relatively polite in asking my questions. If you don't think they're appropriate, please ignore them, or explain why I'm ignorant. Because clearly, I am ignorant of this situation and trying to get some information.

[Guest Reimar]

I cleaned up this thread and deleted some post.

Please keep on topic and don't post "twilight" post's.

Next will be a warning.

[HDRIDER]

HI

Why do you want to know? go find out yourself.

[HDRIDER]

I cleaned up this thread and deleted some post.

Please keep on topic and don't post "twilight" post's.

Next will be a warning.

That just show what people think about him/this tread

[TheDon]

If your unconfortable with her past then why even start a relationship with her?

[CCCP]

I'm not sure who should trust who.

The guy that comes to Thailand to sleep with cheap girls, or the girls that excepts payment for adult fun.

Personally i'm neither nor would i meet a girl that is or was.

[garro]

Remaining faithful is as much about respecting yourself as it is about respecting another person.

[tipsy]

I am not too sure how to answer this question other than saying I would never have a relationship or marry a BG or ex-BG. My wife’s history is important to me, if you think that’s wrong or right that is my choice.

I am completely faithful to my partner, always have been and always will be. I can only think the reason for straying is that she doesn’t complete you; there are things you want that she doesn't have or can offer. If you were 100% happy and fulfilled why would you look elsewhere?

Also I would not date a uneducated girl regardless of where she comes from (Here or back home). A relationship in 'pigeon' English or broken Thai is not something I could/would deal with.

[Samuian]

I am not too sure how to answer this question other than saying I would never have a relationship or marry a BG or ex-BG. My wife’s history is important to me.......

says it all... bad poll!

but then if "history" has been last night, that would be it, SHE would be History!

[henrytuttle]

Thanks for the responses.

I have to admit, I'm a little surprised at the numbers on the poll. But, for those who kept on topic, I appreciate your input.

I'll readily admit my fascination with guys who have serious relationships with professional girls. And, as I've mentioned before, I find nothing wrong with the decisions that these girls made to do what they do, and yet I still don't think I'd be able to have a real relationship with them. Maybe that's my own hangup.

I suppose I should have put two more options on the poll:

5) I would never marry a girl with that sort of history

6) Your poll sucks and you have issues

But then, I probably just would have gotten a 100% #6 and I wouldn't have learned anything.

[tipsy]

Well the lack of number 5 is what prevented me voting

[henrytuttle]

Well the lack of number 5 is what prevented me voting

well, i've learned something from this poll. far fewer of the second choice and far more of the third choice than i would have thought.

if anyone else would have voted 5) I would never marry a girl with that sort of history, post separately. i'm curious.