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:o This morning on the Motorway, I looked over to my left and there was a Woman in a brand new Honda Civic doing 70 miles an hour with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.

I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that makeup.

As a man, I don't scare easily, but she scared me so much I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the meat pie out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car, using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile phone away from my ear. It fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the darn phone, soaked my trousers, and disconnected an important call.

Bloody women drivers!!

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When a woman driver puts her arm out of the window she could be making hand signal (unlikely) drying her nail polish or pointing out a new dress in a shop window to her female passenger or waving to a friend in the street or just about anything.

So remember if you see a woman driver giving what looks like a hand signal the ONLY thing you can be sure of is that the window is open.

:o

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