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Posted

Now that it's settled-down, and the cracks have been poly-filled, Swampy is a fairly average modern airport IMO.

But apart from a few murals & statues scattered round the cavernous building, I find it doesn't feel very Thai, although of course others may disagree. This is perhaps partly because the big-tent design could be just about anywhere !

So I was pondering just what might be done, to make it more of a typical Thai experience ? More artwork would be nice, perhaps a decent food-court serving real Thai food, at real Thai prices ? Or a beach-resort area, where you might relax & take a dip or beach-massage, between connections ?

I mean, LHR gives you a chance at buying some over-priced low-taste fast-food, if you can attract the attention of the staff, I mean that's just redolent of the UK-tourist-experience !

So what would other TV-members advise AAT to add, to make Swampy more ethnic ? :)

Posted

Where do I vote for:

I never really feel the need to wrapped up in the merits or faults of an airport. As long as I don't end up in the bottom of a smoking hole at either end of the runway, it's fine.

I don't go to the airport to shop, eat or socialize. I go there to catch a plane or fetch someone coming in. I barely notice anything.

I think some people try to project some jetsetting image and never realize when they're overdoing it.

OK, just so the mods don't ban me for being a party pooper -- a new coat of paint.

Posted

Beergarden next to Starbuck's.

Get rid of all those jewellery shops and get some proper copy-watch stalls in.

Barbeque carts all the way to the gate.

Sexy DVD hawkers all the way from the gate to Immigration.

Immigration officers should greet all visitors, even the identifiably female, as 'Hansum-Maan'.

Grubby old men with massage brochures waiting just beyond immigration.

Police checks at baggage claim collecting 200 Baht from anyone operating a trolley without a helmet.

It should flood when it rains in an adjacent province. (part-implemented already)

I could go on, but I'm burning Nana-time. :)

Posted

Smash up the floor tiles and make it really uneven and covered with rubble. Add a few unnecessary steps here and there to make it hard for anyone with trolleys or mobility issues. Crack a few pipes so there's smelly water streaming across the floor. Make all the electric cables dangle about 5'6" off the ground with a few exposed wires. Replace every shop with a 7-11. Introduce middle aged women beggars with moribund looking kids flopped across their laps drinking milk from bottles despite being about 7. Make the entire floor area open to motorbikes.

shall I go on?

Posted

7-11 at every gate, tuk tuks and mtotcys should be allowed to roam freely in the terminals, need lottery ticket people wandering around, oh yeah they need to label a bunch of random stuff as vip for no aparent reason

Posted
Smash up the floor tiles and make it really uneven and covered with rubble. Add a few unnecessary steps here and there to make it hard for anyone with trolleys or mobility issues. Crack a few pipes so there's smelly water streaming across the floor. Make all the electric cables dangle about 5'6" off the ground with a few exposed wires. Replace every shop with a 7-11. Introduce middle aged women beggars with moribund looking kids flopped across their laps drinking milk from bottles despite being about 7. Make the entire floor area open to motorbikes.

shall I go on?

Agree with above.

The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

But to answer:

More traffic cones at departures approach.

Loads of staff shuffling around like they only started using shoes in thier teens. And with no apparant goal in mind.

No toilets

Shoddy build quality

Loads, I mean Loads of shops, preferably blocking anywhere you might want to find...like immigration.

Immigration staff so fed up with dealling with rude people they cant bring themselve to be polite evern to those that are not singlet sexpats.

Just enough signage to confuse.

An arrivals meeting point that involves walking through a valley of hawkers, touts and thieves before you can reach it - and then have to go up a floor, re-trace all the way back to the car park. The entrace to which is right above where you left immigration. Nice 200 yard walk

...hang on...its all already there.

Posted
Smash up the floor tiles and make it really uneven and covered with rubble. Add a few unnecessary steps here and there to make it hard for anyone with trolleys or mobility issues. Crack a few pipes so there's smelly water streaming across the floor. Make all the electric cables dangle about 5'6" off the ground with a few exposed wires. Replace every shop with a 7-11. Introduce middle aged women beggars with moribund looking kids flopped across their laps drinking milk from bottles despite being about 7. Make the entire floor area open to motorbikes.

shall I go on?

Agree with above.

The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

But to answer:

More traffic cones at departures approach.

Loads of staff shuffling around like they only started using shoes in thier teens. And with no apparant goal in mind.

No toilets

Shoddy build quality

Loads, I mean Loads of shops, preferably blocking anywhere you might want to find...like immigration.

Immigration staff so fed up with dealling with rude people they cant bring themselve to be polite evern to those that are not singlet sexpats.

Just enough signage to confuse.

An arrivals meeting point that involves walking through a valley of hawkers, touts and thieves before you can reach it - and then have to go up a floor, re-trace all the way back to the car park. The entrace to which is right above where you left immigration. Nice 200 yard walk

...hang on...its all already there.

Mosquitoes !!

Posted
Smash up the floor tiles and make it really uneven and covered with rubble. Add a few unnecessary steps here and there to make it hard for anyone with trolleys or mobility issues. Crack a few pipes so there's smelly water streaming across the floor. Make all the electric cables dangle about 5'6" off the ground with a few exposed wires. Replace every shop with a 7-11. Introduce middle aged women beggars with moribund looking kids flopped across their laps drinking milk from bottles despite being about 7. Make the entire floor area open to motorbikes.

shall I go on?

Agree with above.

The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

But to answer:

More traffic cones at departures approach.

Loads of staff shuffling around like they only started using shoes in thier teens. And with no apparant goal in mind.

No toilets

Shoddy build quality

Loads, I mean Loads of shops, preferably blocking anywhere you might want to find...like immigration.

Immigration staff so fed up with dealling with rude people they cant bring themselve to be polite evern to those that are not singlet sexpats.

Just enough signage to confuse.

An arrivals meeting point that involves walking through a valley of hawkers, touts and thieves before you can reach it - and then have to go up a floor, re-trace all the way back to the car park. The entrace to which is right above where you left immigration. Nice 200 yard walk

...hang on...its all already there.

Mosquitoes !!

Already there...

Not to mention blocking most of the exit doors in arrival making it close to impossible to pick someone up with private car. And generally just taking poor airport design in first place and changing it all to make it even more inconvenient...

Posted

More taxi touts, a few hundred tailor and optometrist shops, and, perhaps some fully staffed dancing poles strategically positioned throughout Arrivals. Oh yes, and a Tesco also!

Posted
The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

Well, I did live in Sweden for a couple of years, but no, I'm genuinely interested in others' ideas (not necessarily too serious) of how to make the place feel more Thai, than it currently does.

So far it seems a fairly harmless, and sometimes entertaining, thread. Isn't that worthwhile ?

I thought the motorbike-taxis & tuk-tuks, to bypass the long walks & queues, was a good start ! :)

Posted

Station a guy outside to tell you the airport is shut for Buddha day but he knows somewhere selling discounted gemstones.

Posted
The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

Well, I did live in Sweden for a couple of years, but no, I'm genuinely interested in others' ideas (not necessarily too serious) of how to make the place feel more Thai, than it currently does.

So far it seems a fairly harmless, and sometimes entertaining, thread. Isn't that worthwhile ?

I thought the motorbike-taxis & tuk-tuks, to bypass the long walks & queues, was a good start ! :)

It was a compliment!

Posted
Station a guy outside to tell you the airport is shut for Buddha day but he knows somewhere selling discounted gemstones.

Now this is a classic. I have been to the LOS nine times. Finally in December 08 I made the time to wander around the Grand Palace and Wat PO. Stayed a at a Gem of a hotel run by students Dusit Suan? Easy five minute walk to the Dusit zoo. Not on the BTS route but for 800 baht the hotel was quiet, neat and had big windows that opened onto the pool area. So nice and cool to have windows open at night and really no noise and they had screens.

Anyway, I took tuk tuk over to the Grand Palace, and sure enough "temple closed". Yeah yeah. So I went on the other tuk tuk ride, just for the experience. Did get to see the marble wat thai and of course three gem and souvenir shops. Did not cost a penny. Driver gets gas coupons or something. Got back in about 2.5 hours and continued my tour of the temples.

Funny thing is, one of my main goals was to see the National Museum. Drivers were adamant that it was closed. I said uh, sure. Well, it actually was! There are a few days when it is closed and that was one of the days.

Posted
perhaps a decent food-court serving real Thai food, at real Thai prices ?

Oddly enough, there is one. It's hidden away at the first level (below arrivals and departures), in the public area. I think it's mostly intended for use by airport employees, although passengers are welcome. Prices and quality are same as in cheap mall food courts (e.g. Central Lad Phrao or Platinum). Pad krapao 30 baht.

What could be done? Not much, I'm afraid. At best, they can put in a few more sculptures or paintings.

I do miss Don Muang precisely for the unmistakable Thai feeling. From the jetway onwards, it was uniquely Thai. I still remember the immediate damp and hot smell of struggling aircon when exiting the plane... and the departures area with the mist-eyed middle-aged Farang bidding fairwell to their Issan teeraks. It had a golf course in the middle of the runway, a normal street with a big glittering wat across the street (real one!). I even heard it had a slightly naughty massage place somewhere (not sure if it was airside or not). DMK was not an airport, but a Thai emotional experience, uncensored.

Suvarnabhumi is an average airport that could be anywhere. While more spacious it doesn't seem much more efficient than DMK -- all the scams are still there and my gate-immigration-taxi time may be even longer, especially with no checked-in luggage. Of course, DMK was obviously operating near capacity and had no room to expand.

Posted
More artwork would be nice, perhaps a decent food-court serving real Thai food, at real Thai prices ?

Oddly enough, there is one. It's hidden away at the first level (below arrivals and departures), in the public area. I think it's mostly intended for use by airport employees, although passengers are welcome. Prices and quality are same as in cheap mall food courts (e.g. Central Lad Phrao or Platinum).

What could be done? Not much, I'm afraid. At best, they can put in a few more sculptures or paintings.

I do miss Don Muang precisely for the unmistakable Thai feeling. From the jetway onwards, it was uniquely Thai. I still remember the immediate damp and hot smell of struggling aircon when exiting the plane... and the departures area with the mist-eyed middle-aged Farang bidding fairwell to their Issan teeraks. It had a golf course in the middle of the runway, a normal street with a big glittering wat across the street (real one!). I even heard it had a slightly naughty massage place somewhere (not sure if it was airside or not). DMK was not an airport, but a Thai emotional experience, uncensored.

Suvarnabhumi is an average airport that could be anywhere. While more spacious it doesn't seem much more efficient than DMK -- all the scams are still there and my gate-immigration-taxi time may be even longer, especially with no checked-in luggage. Of course, DMK was obviously operating near capacity and had no room to expand.

Called "Magic "but keep it quiet otherwise they might start charging rich toorist prices...50 bt a Heinee... :)

Posted

Som tam stalls in the arrivals and departure lounge + dried squid vendor at each departure gate just to give you that authentic Thai smell as you leave.

Random mobs of protestors who select which departure gate they will block at random, something like running a lottery.

To leave you need to pay a one off under the table payment and get to leave on your scheduled flight (unless you are a topless in your passport photo or you have stolen a bar beer towel)

Seriously I dont think any decoration inside can prepare you for the outside

Posted
Now that it's settled-down, and the cracks have been poly-filled, Swampy is a fairly average modern airport IMO.

But apart from a few murals & statues scattered round the cavernous building, I find it doesn't feel very Thai, although of course others may disagree. This is perhaps partly because the big-tent design could be just about anywhere !

So I was pondering just what might be done, to make it more of a typical Thai experience ? More artwork would be nice, perhaps a decent food-court serving real Thai food, at real Thai prices ? Or a beach-resort area, where you might relax & take a dip or beach-massage, between connections ?

I mean, LHR gives you a chance at buying some over-priced low-taste fast-food, if you can attract the attention of the staff, I mean that's just redolent of the UK-tourist-experience !

Have some competing Indian Tailors there to fight over everyones business then you could pick up your clothes that don't fit right before you fly out

So what would other TV-members advise AAT to add, to make Swampy more ethnic ? :)

Posted

Maybe the designers of the new aiport we're trying to give a 'big city feel' to the place and they've definitely succeeded. It's big it's grey etc...

When you arrive in Samui, now there's a different story,you know your going tropical.

Regards Bojo

Posted
Smash up the floor tiles and make it really uneven and covered with rubble. Add a few unnecessary steps here and there to make it hard for anyone with trolleys or mobility issues. Crack a few pipes so there's smelly water streaming across the floor. Make all the electric cables dangle about 5'6" off the ground with a few exposed wires. Replace every shop with a 7-11. Introduce middle aged women beggars with moribund looking kids flopped across their laps drinking milk from bottles despite being about 7. Make the entire floor area open to motorbikes.

shall I go on?

Agree with above.

The OP must have a bit of a Troll about him, no?

But to answer:

More traffic cones at departures approach.

Loads of staff shuffling around like they only started using shoes in thier teens. And with no apparant goal in mind.

No toilets

Shoddy build quality

Loads, I mean Loads of shops, preferably blocking anywhere you might want to find...like immigration.

Immigration staff so fed up with dealling with rude people they cant bring themselve to be polite evern to those that are not singlet sexpats.

Just enough signage to confuse.

An arrivals meeting point that involves walking through a valley of hawkers, touts and thieves before you can reach it - and then have to go up a floor, re-trace all the way back to the car park. The entrace to which is right above where you left immigration. Nice 200 yard walk

...hang on...its all already there.

Mosquitoes !!

Already there...

Not to mention blocking most of the exit doors in arrival making it close to impossible to pick someone up with private car. And generally just taking poor airport design in first place and changing it all to make it even more inconvenient...

I am sorry, but I cannot agree with you. I have flown already several times into SUV and I have gone there to pick up arriving friends. I think it is very easy to pick someone up, the parking lot is never more that a few dozens of meters from an exit door. Just call the person you pick up and tell him what number of door you are most close to. No problem.

Posted

Let make it noise heaven, no limit on the time you can blast your loud speakers, block the street have a party any old time. Bring on the beggars with the babies :D:)

Posted
I am sorry, but I cannot agree with you. I have flown already several times into SUV and I have gone there to pick up arriving friends. I think it is very easy to pick someone up, the parking lot is never more that a few dozens of meters from an exit door. Just call the person you pick up and tell him what number of door you are most close to. No problem.

I've been thru it about 10+ times since Jan alone. Also just pick up mates twice this month. And IMHO it would work much better if they let it function as it has been designed. And can you really park say 30 mins at the arrival level while waiting without being fined or towed away ?

You are right that there is a exit door always very close when you pick up your mates. However are you aware that most of those doors are locked and no exit. Most of the time you pass customs in the middle of the terminal and first doors you can exit are No.3 in the right hand side and No. 10 if you decide to turn left. The doors in between are even locked or lead to a box of crowd control fences or some exclusive parking lot of a limousine company.

What i'm saying they should remove all the fencing in arrival hall first and then open all the lifts and escalators to public. The place has been designed to handle big number of passengers and they are already talking on expanding and still they operate the place on 30% most of the time.

The trick is that they have 3 immigration halls, now at least one of them is only for "VIP's" and always empty. They also have 3 baggage claim halls and now they seem to be all operating but out of sync with arrival gates and immigration halls people are directed. Too often you need to walk from immigration to other end of the airport to pick up your luckage. They also have 3 customs "halls" but almost always they direct all passengers to the middle one and remaining 2 set of desks are closed. And it continues all the way to the exit doors. 2 out of 12 are in use ?

The place looks like a cattle ranch. Seriously, arrival hall is 3 meters wide due the fenced in relatives and desks selling sim cards and overpriced limos and hotels. They should open all of the immigrations halls, direct you to the nearest one from the gate, deliver luggage to the claim area right behind the immigration you are in and naturally let you thru customs and exit door to your waiting car or taxi que without the need to walk few km's sideways. By doing that the airport would feel much less crowded, no queing in immigration and customs and so much more convenient for passengers.

Simple day trip to Singapore Changi should be mandatory for all the staff before they are allowed to set foot inside the terminal !

Edit: But i guess making it work wont make it feel more thai :)

Posted

ear splitting noise and lots of it , raw sewerage , roaming buffalos , packs of skanky dogs , live low hanging pylons , free handouts of yaba , 24 hour std call centre advice hotline cards and free cd's of hotel california

Posted

Remove toilet paper and toilet seats from the WCs. Move in a few elephants. Allow people to urinate inside the terminal. Allow touts to flash pictures of half-dressed women yelling, "Happy hour, half-price!". Pipe in lots of charcoal smoke. Set a few truck tires on fire. Remove 90% of the lights.

Posted

Functionally, one big thing I hate is if you get to your departure gate early, you "can't" use a toilet. They have none just past the last security gate. The toilets are downstairs, and you can't get to them until after getting the final boarding pass check in. Really bad setup there. I have seen people climb over the chain across the ramp. And of course the PA system is completely un intelligible. Horrible acoustics.

Now for asthetics. How about some live plants and flowers in there? Put some tropical plants in some places. Some Thai Tapestries, some Elephant statues, some Thai architecture etc. If you go through the Taipei airport in Taiwan, they have some nice plant areas there down a few of the aisles. The Thai airport is just too sterile in appearance. I miss the old one. That worked fine for me.

The idea is to let a traveler get some sort of feel that he is in asia, is in the tropics etc. Those little things and first impressions can be a wonderful part of a trip.

Posted

Currently ,it is an annoying blend of overpriced shops & eating places and hard prison furniture.

There is no art,comfort or friendliness.

Perhaps it could learn for Northern Airports Chiang Mai/Chiang Rai with a smaller number of shops,but themed to local crafts.

Yes,local fruit and produce could still make a profit and give a less "rip off" atmosphere.

Thailand struggles to attract visitors who want value,quality and distinctiveness,Suvarnabhumi is cold,expensive and uncomfortable.

Don Muang was a feel better mixer ,and distinctively Thai airport

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