Worst Joke Ever

[laislica]

It is said that a keen bird watcher is one who prefers a seagull on the rocks to a shag on the beach

Nice one - Thankd for the shag - or is it Root?

[laislica]

Sorry, I only managed to post once - what am I doing wrong?

I asked my dog but there was no help there.

So do tell - what I gotta do?

[scottishjohn]

It is said that a keen bird watcher is one who prefers a seagull on the rocks to a shag on the beach

Or is that 'Rockall' (an island where the Shags Shag Shags!)

I just felt I had to quote that one!

[Robby nz]

Shags Shag Shags in Thailand as well.

A Shag (little Cormorant) in breeding plumage.

Didn't actually see it shag another Shag but it seems it is all dressed for the occasion.

[scottishjohn]

It is said that a keen bird watcher is one who prefers a seagull on the rocks to a shag on the beach

Nice one - Thankd for the shag - or is it Root?

But you have to watch out for the sand getting to the root of your problem

[kevjohn]

[kevjohn]

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[7by7]

Erwin Schrödinger was driving along the road somewhat erratically when he was stopped by the police.

Excuse me, sir" said one of the officers, "but due to the way you have been driving we want to search your car."

So he got out of the car and stood at the side of the road while they got on with it.

After a couple of minutes one of the policemen came up to him and said "Do you know there's a dead cat in the boot of your car?"

To which he replied "I do now!"

[loong]

I was looking at the forum and I saw a banner with "5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

So I clicked on it and was told that I have visited the site 5,478 times.

That's insane as i have never visited the site in my life!

Could this be a computer virus causing this?

[wooloomooloo]

What is the biggest mouse in the world? Enormouse.

[Robby nz]

"5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

The first sign Loong is if you click on the advert.

[loong]

"5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

The first sign Loong is if you click on the advert.

Not sure why you are directing your post at me.

I haven't posted anything about Alzheimer's.

But i did see a banner with "5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

So I clicked on it and was told that I have visited the site 5,489 times.

That's ridiculous as i have never visited the site in my life!

Maybe someone else has Hijacked my account?

[loong]

"5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

The first sign Loong is if you click on the advert.

Not sure why you are directing your post at me.

I've not posted anything about Alzheimer's.

But i did see a banner with "5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

I clicked on it and was told that I have visited the site 5,490 times.

That's daft as i have never visited the site in my life!

Maybe some sort of virus?

[Fookhaht]

Why would I open a thread that read, "Worst Joke Ever?" Except to post this note?

[Crossy]

Soooo, are the multiple posts by Loong a product of the forum bug or something else

[7by7]

A little girl goes to the barber with her father.

When his turn comes she stands next to the chair eating a cake and the barber says to her "You're going to get hair on your muffin."

"I know" she says, "I'm going to get tits as well!"

[loong]

Soooo, are the multiple posts by Loong a product of the forum bug or something else

Not a bug, part of the worst joke.

But i did see a banner with "5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

I clicked on it and was told that I have visited the site 5,490 times.

in the previous apparent double post, the number was 5,489

[WitawatWatawit]

Soooo, are the multiple posts by Loong a product of the forum bug or something else

Not a bug, part of the worst joke.

But i did see a banner with "5 signs you'll get Alzheimer's"

I clicked on it and was told that I have visited the site 5,490 times.

in the previous apparent double post, the number was 5,489

That's the problem with watchamacallit. Nice joke Loong

[7by7]

A year 4 teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up - fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman and so forth.

However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied,
"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes to music in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and took little Justin aside, "Is that really true about your father?"

"No," the boy said, "He works for the Labour Party trying to get Milliband elected Prime Minister; but it's too embarrassing to say that in front of the other kids."

[theblether]

[Ace of Pop]

Told My Wife i'd been Surfing the Web for Cheap Flights. She was really excited.Never realised she enjoyed Darts.

[senton1]

My Dad was walking across the street and the man heard a chicken clucking on the fence, he looked at the chicken, the chicken looked back and said, cluck cluck cluck cluuuuck, my pops said cluuuuck cluck cluuck cluck cluuuuuck!!!......the chicken was rather insulted and replied......cluck cluck cluuuuuuuuck cluck CLUCK!!!!!!!!

Then this police came along and arrested both of them for utilizing Fowl language.

Edited August 13, 2013 by Crossy
link removed

[Robby nz]

My neighbor dug a big hole in his garden.

The fellow on the other side said he liked the hole and wanted to buy it.

So they dug the whole hole out and moved it to the other garden.

My neighbor has just been dragged off kicking and screaming by the police.

Seems he didn't have hole sale license.

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]