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You Know You've Been In Thailand Too Long When...


eyebee

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You use words like "sadeur" when talking to your kids and have to think hard for a translation to "belly button".

You can use a service station loo without getting naked first - and stay dry!

You buy your cigies in pairs rather than packets.

You tut and mutter under your breathe when you see:

- Two tourists kissing in public

- A farang tourist stroking his Thai "girlfriend's" hair

- A farang kids talking back to his parents

You snuigger knowingly when you hear some farang saying "Ka" at the end of each sentance of bad pidgin Thai

Edited by wolf5370
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You believe the girlfriend that your going to win the lottery when she has a dream about blood.

You believe it even more when her mother has the same dream.

You answer the phone 'Halloooow, err, err, err youbaan'.

You sit and prepare food on the floor whilst in a perfectly equipped kitchen.

You overtake buses on the left side because you know theres not a chance it will move from the outside lane.

You cross over the grass verge and drive on the wrong side of the highway at night with your highbeam on even though the U turn is only 100 metres up the road.

The highlight of the day is sitting under the house with 3 bottles of chang and shooting the chickens with your catapult.

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You believe the girlfriend that your going to win the lottery when she has a dream about blood.

You believe it even more when her mother has the same dream.

You answer the phone 'Halloooow, err, err, err youbaan'.

You sit and prepare food on the floor whilst in a perfectly equipped kitchen.

You overtake buses on the left side because you know theres not a chance it will move from the outside lane.

You cross over the grass verge and drive on the wrong side of the highway at night with your highbeam on even though the U turn is only 100 metres up the road.

The highlight of the day is sitting under the house with 3 bottles of chang and shooting the chickens with your catapult.

:o:D:D

Role reversal! My T.hubby and his mum are always doing that!

Haha! Perfect phonetics!! (Or Phone ethics?!) :D

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When you pick up the phone in between rings, never when it's actually ringing.

When you pluck hairs out of your chin using two 1B coins.

When you decorate your car dashboard with 50 stg coins.

When you feel a compelling need to have to place a GSM Mobile sticker on your car.

When you use big paper clips with a belt to keep your skirt or trousers up.

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when you fail to be bothered by female cleaners entering the toilet and doing their duties while you are at the urinal because you have cleverly created a new category of human species to account for them and their inexplicably shameless manner.

having said that, i am still bothered by grown men giving me a back massage while i am standing helplessly at the urinal. and after that, as if to mock me further, demanding that i give them some small change for their efforts. i have no words to describe this highly uneasy experience except to say that i feel violated and taken advantage of. someone should put a stop to this mensroom molestation. :o

Edited by thedude
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when you speak in Thai to other local farang as "it's simpler to understand".

you go to a farang country and have to ask your Thai wife what the word for "mai jim fun" (toothpick) is in English.

you feel faintly uneasy when visitors to Thailand use their feet to move things or even worse - pretend to kick someone in fun

visiting a farang country you are horrified at the thought of having to use toilet paper (slight varaition on an earlier mentioned point)

I guess I have been in Thailand too long, as I know and can relate to virtually every item posted under this topic so far....jeez!

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when you speak in Thai to other local farang as "it's simpler to understand"....

:o:D:D Today an Italian came to visit my Italian neighbour who had already gone out somewhere. I can't speak Italian so I shouted to him "Bai laew". He understood :D

Just in case his brother calls. and he doesn`t understand Thai this will do the trick

" Buon giorno, Ill signiore a uchito, ma non so dove."

( The gentleman has gone out, but I don`t know where)

If it was evening when he called start " Buona Sera". :D

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  • 2 weeks later...
QUOTE(Neeranam @ 2005-03-04 21:41:21)

QUOTE

When you pick up the phone in between rings, never when it's actually ringing.

I used to do that before I came to Thailand

You been too long there then. Good job you came to Thailand in time. 

:o:D:D:D:D:D

Don't know why, but I thought that hilarious.

You should be on stage lampard10

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You have a very expensive teak table and chairs but choose to eat all meals sitting on the floor.

:D:D Very True. We've got a dining table that is now used as a tv and video stand in my bedroom.

In a similar vein, my pa-in-law likes to sleep on the hardwood floor....next to a king-size mattressed bed. :o

Edited by Gazza
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  Very True. We've got a dining table that is now used as a tv and video stand in my bedroom.

In a similar vein, my pa-in-law likes to sleep on the hardwood floor....next to a king-size mattressed bed.

We just got a sink next to the bathroom connected for running water.

My wife pointed out to me that I had filled "kan" (the container for puting the water in when taking a shower - what's the english word?) and taken it to the sink to shave, and clean my teeth.

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  Very True. We've got a dining table that is now used as a tv and video stand in my bedroom.

In a similar vein, my pa-in-law likes to sleep on the hardwood floor....next to a king-size mattressed bed.

We just got a sink next to the bathroom connected for running water.

My wife pointed out to me that I had filled "kan" (the container for puting the water in when taking a shower - what's the english word?) and taken it to the sink to shave, and clean my teeth.

Danm! I do that all the time

...bugs ain't got me yet (touch wood).

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