Why Not Socialize More?

[Birdman]

Many aspects are involved why not "hi and nod" to another farang. One of these aspects would be the education system in the West, which teaches to be better than the other, but lacks education on how to socialise with others.

That, among other things, brings the people to their impersonal behaviour in the West, ignoring others in public places in a way that e.g. a longer look at another will be considered as an impertinence.

Everyone who has been in Thailand for longer than 1 week and comes back to their Western city will realise that at least on the first day, before he falls back into that pattern.

So, by living that kind of life in the West, it is difficult for many, who come mainly from Western cities, to understand nodding or a short hello here.

[Harcourt]

"....I dont mean to come across as rude, but this topic has been brought up countless times that a quick search would produce numerous threads...." (Eek).

There are new members every day, I presume....All topics would be new to them.

Are you suggesting that everyone search for the keywords in their title before posting it?

Not being sarcastic or trying to start a debate....just interested to know what the norm is as I'm relatively new here.

[Birdman]

"....I dont mean to come across as rude, but this topic has been brought up countless times that a quick search would produce numerous threads...." (Eek).

There are new members every day, I presume....All topics would be new to them.

Are you suggesting that everyone search for the keywords in their title before posting it?

Not being sarcastic or trying to start a debate....just interested to know what the norm is as I'm relatively new here.

You are totally right and that's why a forum like this will constantly change many of their members.

[IanForbes]

We would get along, Glegolo, because we are probably alike. But, it never concerns me what others do or think. If they want to be friendly then fine. If not then who cares?

What Birdman says is basically true... it's a common western trait not to acknowledge strangers. But, it is surprising how many people break into a smile when I acknowledge their presence. I'm not trying make friends or hit on them for any purpose other than to be friendly. A smile CAN brighten someone's otherwise dull day. I don't bother people who are obviously busy, in a conversation, or going somewhere, because their body language tells me not to approach them. But, I've had some remarkable conversations on the train, bus or plane that struck up further friendships later on.

[texancowboy]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

[Neeranam]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

Coincedentally, a young guy did speak to me in Tops recently and he was definitely two of the above and probably 3.

[IanForbes]

"....I dont mean to come across as rude, but this topic has been brought up countless times that a quick search would produce numerous threads...." (Eek).

There are new members every day, I presume....All topics would be new to them.

Are you suggesting that everyone search for the keywords in their title before posting it?

Not being sarcastic or trying to start a debate....just interested to know what the norm is as I'm relatively new here.

I wondered exactly the same thing, Harcourt. I normally agree with most of what eek posts, but not this time. How far back is someone supposed to search? And what words are you supposed to use? I can think of MANY topics that have been discussed thoroughly in previous threads a few months old, but anyone new would not know where to look. If I have to spend 20 minutes searching for old topics then I probably wouldn't add anything new. There are many dry topics such as "Where can I buy this or that?" or "How can I get to there from here?". They can be answered in a few lines. And, many of those topics should be researched a little before posting. But if that was all there was to this forum it would be a very boring place and would have few people responding.

There are MANY sub-forums in Thaivisa and unless you visit them all you can miss some interesting stuff. Most of us just don't have the time to visit them all. Only today someone tried posting a note that Walter Cronkite died. Because Churchill had already posted on an obscure sub-forum the topic was closed.

[akirasan]

I don't usually talk to other foreigners because I get bored of answering the same questions.

[473geo]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

Coincedentally, a young guy did speak to me in Tops recently and he was definitely two of the above and probably 3.

Well did you speak back.......or ignore him???

[doggie888888]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

4. drunk

5. shortsighted becasue grandpa left his glasses at home, thinking he can sweet young things that he still has 20-20 vision

6. farang trying to scam another foreigner

this is fun, anyone care to add?

[Birdman]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

4. drunk

5. shortsighted becasue grandpa left his glasses at home, thinking he can sweet young things that he still has 20-20 vision

6. farang trying to scam another foreigner

this is fun, anyone care to add?

7. new, sincere, just wanted advice from the only other foreigner.

8. wanted to tell you, that you have lost your wallet and wanted to give it back to you.

9. an old friend from school can remember you

[neverdie]

rixalex, you have me picked incorrectly & I think if you checked thru all my posts, most of them would have nothing to do with flirting, most my posts are filled with ANGER and VIOLENCE . You also seem to neglect the fact that I may just have one or two friends here on thai visa, both male or female whom I joke with in such manner. Knowing eeek, if I step out of line she will soon let me know about it. Please be my guest, put me on block if you don't like it, I recall others have done so, but for some reason they always seem to return to speak to me at a later stage .

Perhaps you are in need of a little bit of attention yourself or are you just the jealous type.

My goodness me neverdie! I was pulling your leg <deleted>!

Sorry for hitting a nerve.

My goodness me neverdie! I was pulling your leg <deleted>!

Sorry for hitting a nerve.

Take him outside for a spanking. I know he likes that.

rixalex, come on, get off the grass, I know ur the jealous type, now ur trying to cover it with this pulling ur leg thing. Its alright honey, I think your about the most georgous farang cross dresser on thai visa....mmmm except for maybe G54, hes really first class. here, get this into ya ->>> .

I also think sometimes that things don't come across that well, especially for me as im an informal type of person. Spent the majority of my life living as Captain Chaos, with systems, forms, lines and boxes.....but now im free so i often type without proof reading nor worry too much about how something cums out. except for that last cum, that was intentional.

eeek, you promised me you wouldnt tell.....now it really ova, its official my favourite thai visa lady is sexy, beautiful and kind & nobody will ever be able to guess who she is .

(Im going to be trouble now!!! )

OP (I think its Glegolo , By the way, dispite the fact that ur hearing the word 'falang'its actually written 'farang'. Its a bit like the 'dak-ling' you keep mistaking for darling

Edited July 18, 2009 by neverdie

[robblok]

If someone says hi to me ill always greet back. But i wont always greet ppl kinda depends on the situation and the person i see in front of me.

I mean if i see a fat old guy with a 30 yr younger girl im less inclined to greet and socialize then when i meet someone my own age.

Also i might not have even noticed them because if im looking for something or doing some shopping im busy with that. Would i meet someone in the gym i would approuch them more easily because i have common ground then.

[neverdie]

We would get along, Glegolo, because we are probably alike. But, it never concerns me what others do or think. If they want to be friendly then fine. If not then who cares?

What Birdman says is basically true... it's a common western trait not to acknowledge strangers. But, it is surprising how many people break into a smile when I acknowledge their presence. I'm not trying make friends or hit on them for any purpose other than to be friendly. A smile CAN brighten someone's otherwise dull day. I don't bother people who are obviously busy, in a conversation, or going somewhere, because their body language tells me not to approach them. But, I've had some remarkable conversations on the train, bus or plane that struck up further friendships later on.

Ian, you come across as the sort of chap that would get along with just about anyone. People like that are great, but not everybody is the same. Personally, I use to be a very social person, however over time I have learnt to be very wary of the fellow human being. I would be quite happy with a fishing rod, old fourbie, tinny boat and a dog.

If anything is ever going to hurt or deceive you, it will be a human being.

I often wave at people, but apparently you are suppose to use all your fingers when waving....I never have been able to get that right

[ace]

But we do speak/acknowlege to fellow human beings of any race....that is what we have in common we CAN!!......although it would appear there are those who do not wish to use this attribute.......

So you say hello to every Thai you walk past?

I am confident...... ok.....I have no fear of making eye contact....... if that is returned I nod or smile.....

You guys are funny - if I wanted to meet pasty farang all day i'd retire to Scotland or something.

BTW-Making eye contact with strangers is a v. northern europe thing & considered rude generally in Asian cultures.

[mauGR1]

If some farang approached me in Foodland with a big smile and wave.

I would think of mainly three things

1. Homosexual

2. Mental problems

3 American mormon

4. drunk

5. shortsighted becasue grandpa left his glasses at home, thinking he can sweet young things that he still has 20-20 vision

6. farang trying to scam another foreigner

this is fun, anyone care to add?

7. new, sincere, just wanted advice from the only other foreigner.

8. wanted to tell you, that you have lost your wallet and wanted to give it back to you.

9. an old friend from school can remember you

10.A unknown stunningly beautiful young farang female winking to you across the 7/11 shelf..Sure most of you would ignore her,right?

[GreenSnapper]

You guys really ought to take a look at what you are writing.......then think.... we are in Thailand where the majority of people always nod or smile a greeting.....although I am not surprised if they don't bother with you miserable lot.......you might just want to take a look at yourselves and ask if you miserable/private people are actually the ones out of sync here.......

Sad sad sad people.....and you even try to justify your ignorance.....amazing Thailand!!!!

Exactly.

This is very typical in Thailand. Some here have mentioned the "oddballs" here, but the oddest thing are those socially handicapped farangs here. Very different to other Asian countries, where the foreigners tend to be much more open minded.

There was this farang lady in my apartment, about 30 years old, and when I meet her in the elevator, she constantly looks at the wall, not returning any "hello" and such, happy when she can get out of it.

Sad, lonely people here.

[glegolo]

You guys really ought to take a look at what you are

Sad sad sad people.....and you even try to justify your ignorance.....amazing Thailand!!!!

-----------------------------

Exactly.

This is very typical in Thailand. Some here have mentioned the "oddballs" here, but the oddest thing are those socially handicapped farangs here. Very different to other Asian countries, where the foreigners tend to be much more open minded.

There was this farang lady in my apartment, about 30 years old, and when I meet her in the elevator, she constantly looks at the wall, not returning any "hello" and such, happy when she can get out of it.

Sad, lonely people here.

------------------------------------------

Nice to see that there are so many normal people out here ,it doesn´t cost that much to say hello. And we cannot be so very very very afraid of being attacked by some idiot just because we answer a nice mans/girls hello. I will never stop doing it, and I hope that all these negative guys out there will be really bothered by it.....

And "neverdie".. I am a male... I know how to spell Farang, but I always more or less write as I speak, so I write falang... I live up in Isaan, which gives me some insight!!

Glegolo

[chiangmaibruce]

"....I dont mean to come across as rude, but this topic has been brought up countless times that a quick search would produce numerous threads...." (Eek).

There are new members every day, I presume....All topics would be new to them.

Are you suggesting that everyone search for the keywords in their title before posting it?

Not being sarcastic or trying to start a debate....just interested to know what the norm is as I'm relatively new here.

I wondered exactly the same thing, Harcourt. I normally agree with most of what eek posts, but not this time. How far back is someone supposed to search? And what words are you supposed to use? I can think of MANY topics that have been discussed thoroughly in previous threads a few months old, but anyone new would not know where to look. If I have to spend 20 minutes searching for old topics then I probably wouldn't add anything new. There are many dry topics such as "Where can I buy this or that?" or "How can I get to there from here?". They can be answered in a few lines. And, many of those topics should be researched a little before posting. But if that was all there was to this forum it would be a very boring place and would have few people responding.

Sorry to go off-topic everyone, but this is an important point ...

When you guys go to a library, do you head straight to the catalogue or just go to the front desk and say "hey, I'd like you to order in a book for me (on topic X)?". I'm with Eek on this one. If you take a long-term view of Thaivisa as an info resource then it make sense to search first to find the most recent relevant topic. After reading it you will normally have you answer there and then, and if not then tag a new post on the end and send it out here. That way you are building on an accessible knowledge base and not just gumming up the works with endless repetitive posts that go round in a circle. If on the other hand you take a short-term "use it then lose it" view of TV then this make no sense - so sure, start a new thread.

Yes, searching takes some persistence but if people want the info then I don't think it's unreasonable that they should be prepared to invest a bit of their own time. And of course searching is made more difficult by the issue we are talking about - many short threads on an identical topic. I think its pretty clear that many posters would rather sit back and have others to spend their time instead. Personally I never have a problem (in contributing info) when people have made an effort to look around and gain some basic understanding of the issue before posting. One of the real strengths of Thaivisa is to offer a place to get answers to those tricky questions for which an answer would never be found. Sometimes less is more.

Edited July 18, 2009 by chiangmaibruce

[rixalex]

rixalex, come on, get off the grass, I know ur the jealous type, now ur trying to cover it with this pulling ur leg thing.

OK mate, i'll get off the grass if you stop smoking it.

Seriously, it was just a joke - but i wouldn't have bothered if i knew you'd read so much into it. Geez. I've met less sensitive women! (no offence eek - i'm sure you're not at all sensitive - in fact i'm sure you're a beautiful woman... oops this flirting thing is contagious!)

[473geo]

But we do speak/acknowlege to fellow human beings of any race....that is what we have in common we CAN!!......although it would appear there are those who do not wish to use this attribute.......

So you say hello to every Thai you walk past?

I am confident...... ok.....I have no fear of making eye contact....... if that is returned I nod or smile.....

You guys are funny - if I wanted to meet pasty farang all day i'd retire to Scotland or something.

BTW-Making eye contact with strangers is a v. northern europe thing & considered rude generally in Asian cultures.

When I walk around the market almost every Thai makes eye contact.....I do not consider that rude...and apparently to my knowledge neither they because they smile and generally we exchange a few words.......perhaps they are not of the Asian culture you speak of......

As for meeting farangs all day....doesn't happen in Thailand for me......but when I do I don't ignore them.....

[sassienie]

This same topic has been covered time & time again on ThaiVisa, so not much really to add.

These days I don’t put myself out to be sociable with my countrymen here for reasons that one either receives the traditional Farang greeting as pictured below or the invisible treatment.

[Birdman]

"....I dont mean to come across as rude, but this topic has been brought up countless times that a quick search would produce numerous threads...." (Eek).

There are new members every day, I presume....All topics would be new to them.

Are you suggesting that everyone search for the keywords in their title before posting it?

Not being sarcastic or trying to start a debate....just interested to know what the norm is as I'm relatively new here.

I wondered exactly the same thing, Harcourt. I normally agree with most of what eek posts, but not this time. How far back is someone supposed to search? And what words are you supposed to use? I can think of MANY topics that have been discussed thoroughly in previous threads a few months old, but anyone new would not know where to look. If I have to spend 20 minutes searching for old topics then I probably wouldn't add anything new. There are many dry topics such as "Where can I buy this or that?" or "How can I get to there from here?". They can be answered in a few lines. And, many of those topics should be researched a little before posting. But if that was all there was to this forum it would be a very boring place and would have few people responding.

Sorry to go off-topic everyone, but this is an important point ...

When you guys go to a library, do you head straight to the catalogue or just go to the front desk and say "hey, I'd like you to order in a book for me (on topic X)?". I'm with Eek on this one. If you take a long-term view of Thaivisa as an info resource then it make sense to search first to find the most recent relevant topic. After reading it you will normally have you answer there and then, and if not then tag a new post on the end and send it out here. That way you are building on an accessible knowledge base and not just gumming up the works with endless repetitive posts that go round in a circle. If on the other hand you take a short-term "use it then lose it" view of TV then this make no sense - so sure, start a new thread.

Yes, searching takes some persistence but if people want the info then I don't think it's unreasonable that they should be prepared to invest a bit of their own time. And of course searching is made difficult by the problem we arre talking about - many short threads on an identical topic. I think its pretty clear that many posters would rather sit back and have others to spend their time instead. Personally I never have a problem (in contributing) when people seem to have made an effort to look around and gain some basic understanding of the issue before posting. One of the real strengths of Thaivisa is to offer a place to get answers to those tricky questions for which an answer would never be found. Somtimes less is more.

No, that would be the end of a lively forum. There will always be fresh aspects, ideas, arguments....new people join, others change their view of things...

If one or another thread bores you and you can add nothing, just skip it.

[eek]

My goodness me neverdie! I was pulling your leg <deleted>!

Sorry for hitting a nerve.

Take him outside for a spanking. I know he likes that.

rixalex, come on, get off the grass, I know ur the jealous type, now ur trying to cover it with this pulling ur leg thing. Its alright honey, I think your about the most georgous farang cross dresser on thai visa....mmmm except for maybe G54, hes really first class. here, get this into ya ->>> .

I also think sometimes that things don't come across that well, especially for me as im an informal type of person. Spent the majority of my life living as Captain Chaos, with systems, forms, lines and boxes.....but now im free so i often type without proof reading nor worry too much about how something cums out. except for that last cum, that was intentional.

eeek, you promised me you wouldnt tell.....now it really ova, its official my favourite thai visa lady is sexy, beautiful and kind & nobody will ever be able to guess who she is .

(Im going to be trouble now!!! )

OMG! Neverdie! What did you do to my quoted post. Is that not illegal or something? Evil little man. Where exactly is it that you live again! Im gunning for ya now!

[473geo]

Really amazing how a topic is rolling along, and the we've been here before brigade feel that mentioning 'we have been here before' is somehow contributing to the topic..........

If you guys have no problem ignoring people...surely it is not too much of a stretch to ignore what you consider to be a repetitive thread??

I will refrain from making the obvious comment here!!!

[neverdie]

rixalex, come on, get off the grass, I know ur the jealous type, now ur trying to cover it with this pulling ur leg thing.

OK mate, i'll get off the grass if you stop smoking it.

Seriously, it was just a joke - but i wouldn't have bothered if i knew you'd read so much into it. Geez. I've met less sensitive women! (no offence eek - i'm sure you're not at all sensitive - in fact i'm sure you're a beautiful woman... oops this flirting thing is contagious!)

Nope Rixalex (what does that stand for by the way?),

Ive neva smoked that <deleted> either. You need to steer away from my flirting posts and go to my anti-drug lectures....geeze I hate druggies . Anyway, for the rest about contagious diseases I will leave you with it, I don't know much about that kina stuff but you probably do.

You see, this is one of the reasons I don't socialise with some of the people I meet in the street, I would just end up doing what I was trained to do and cut someone throat or give them a third eye or something Take note, Don't smile at me in tesco/lotus fella

[neverdie]

My goodness me neverdie! I was pulling your leg <deleted>!

Sorry for hitting a nerve.

Take him outside for a spanking. I know he likes that.

rixalex, come on, get off the grass, I know ur the jealous type, now ur trying to cover it with this pulling ur leg thing. Its alright honey, I think your about the most georgous farang cross dresser on thai visa....mmmm except for maybe G54, hes really first class. here, get this into ya ->>> .

I also think sometimes that things don't come across that well, especially for me as im an informal type of person. Spent the majority of my life living as Captain Chaos, with systems, forms, lines and boxes.....but now im free so i often type without proof reading nor worry too much about how something cums out. except for that last cum, that was intentional.

eeek, you promised me you wouldnt tell.....now it really ova, its official my favourite thai visa lady is sexy, beautiful and kind & nobody will ever be able to guess who she is .

(Im going to be trouble now!!! )

OMG! Neverdie! What did you do to my quoted post. Is that not illegal or something? Evil little man. Where exactly is it that you live again! Im gunning for ya now!

I didnt even noticed I did that.....neither did rixalex (& he notices everything). eek, I simply split ur post by not noticing ur little bit at the end....PLEASE DON'T TAKE CREDIT, for my foul aggressive and anti everything post I placed in between your two lines.

[neverdie]

Really amazing how a topic is rolling along, and the we've been here before brigade feel that mentioning 'we have been here before' is somehow contributing to the topic..........

If you guys have no problem ignoring people...surely it is not too much of a stretch to ignore what you consider to be a repetitive thread??

I will refrain from making the obvious comment here!!!

Most the people contributing here didnt say anything about 'we have been here before'.

It seems to me you want to start up ur own brigade here......the, 'I hand out at the supermarket trying to make friends' brigade and youve just got to realise that isnt everyones cuppa tea.

[Samuian]

looking for people to socialize with in a shopping mall - that's pretty low diggin'...!

Sorry, but who would go and look for gold in a sewer?

I go, if so to shopping mall for shopping, not to bide time...or because I am bored!

Preferable I go to the local market, there people are still cool,

not automated and micro-chip driven yet...

Even locals smile at you, after some time,

they will offer to you what you bought most often,

chat with the lady or with you if one can converse in the local language...

Life is to BE alive!

I find shopping malls - form the human point of view appalling!

These structures they lack character... it's only designed for commerce..

and it seems to seep out of every corner and the sterile neon led - lightning...yuk!

Sorry, but get a life!

It's out there.... other wise I am quite happy if no one needs or desires my attention -

so I have some time for myself... drinking tea, chopping wood and carrying water...whilst blinking into the sun, the blue sky and being busy listening to the wind in the Palmleaves and the little symphonies of the birds around...

sorry... busy ... with that..!

[venturalaw]

Shortly after I first arrived here I use to be very open and friendly in public places. Now that I've settled in for a couple of years, I've regressed into the impersonal persona that I disliked experiencing from where I came. Not good. I appreciate the OP bringing this topic up and will be more open to farang's being friendly.