Crying Baby, Sleepless Nights

[Richb2004v2]

I have a problem that has probably been faced by many many parents over the years, but never the less whilst it happens it is a real pain. We have two month old twins and one of them is giving us extreme trouble with sleepless nights. My son sleeps perfectly and gives us no bother at all. Our daughter is the exact opposite. She cry's on and off all night and is incredibly demanding. Both me and my wife have ages a decade or so in four weeks of missed sleep. Nothing seems to work. My question is, how far do we go in trying to let her cry and cry and cry to get out of being picked up and carried when she cry's? My wife said she tried to leave her but she cries to the extend of turning herself blue and almost exploding! Any ideas or opinion from experienced parents would be welcome. I don't think I can cope with many more sleepless nights

[kurnell]

My first daughter cried a lot early on and I guess it was colic. It wasn't every night, more on and off. She grew out of it after about 6 weeks. I had bugger all sleep, but still managed to function. 2nd one sleeps a lot better, so do I. If it's colic you can try asking the doctor for some meds to relieve the symptoms. My wife also tried some stinky herb that you rub on the stomach (Thais know what iti is, smells like roten onions), and despite the fact that it seems completely illogical that something rubbed on the skin could have an effect on internal organs, it miraculously worked sometimes. Other times it did not!!

[torrenova]

Ours didn't start like this until 4 months or so and then only for a short while. She would settle down with a bottle after a bath and sleep, then wake, not wanting another bottle but rather nothing. She would cry for a long time. Changed nappies if soiled, feeds offered, checked temperature etc. She didn't have any childhood illnesses but she wanted people near her. That comfort level is only starting to subside now she is over 2 years old.

[cdnvic]

We were lucky with our daughter, she mostly slept through the night, but on those restless nights where she would be waking a lot, I found that a radio being on quietly gave her something to listen to and that seemed to at least keep her quiet if not asleep.

[Datsun240Z]

This is all phsycological! The baby cries because it's need attention, it's his only way of communicating with his parents.

Like described above, it's best to let the baby know something is there for him, this can be a radio for instance.

[zzaa09]

We were lucky with our daughter, she mostly slept through the night, but on those restless nights where she would be waking a lot, I found that a radio being on quietly gave her something to listen to and that seemed to at least keep her quiet if not asleep.

Clever.

[Boo]

My son suffered what we were told was colic, for the first 3 months, but after vsiting a pediatrician in Samui we switched him to Soya & he was like a different child after 3 days. happier contented & without terrible griping stomach pain & wind.

The only thing that would sooth him during those first few montsh was to be carried in his baby bjorn carrier or a drive in the car. The motion & being close to one of our bodies really settled him & he would often fall asleep in it.

Another thing, are the babies in seperate cots? Could it be that she is used to sleeping in the womb very close to her brother so now feels seperation anxiety.

The only thing I can really honestly say though it.....it will pass, it may not seem like you will ever get to sleep again but it will get better but sleepless nights & guess work on what is wrong with baby is part & parcel of parenthood.

Good luck.

[scorecard]

I have a problem that has probably been faced by many many parents over the years, but never the less whilst it happens it is a real pain. We have two month old twins and one of them is giving us extreme trouble with sleepless nights. My son sleeps perfectly and gives us no bother at all. Our daughter is the exact opposite. She cry's on and off all night and is incredibly demanding. Both me and my wife have ages a decade or so in four weeks of missed sleep. Nothing seems to work. My question is, how far do we go in trying to let her cry and cry and cry to get out of being picked up and carried when she cry's? My wife said she tried to leave her but she cries to the extend of turning herself blue and almost exploding! Any ideas or opinion from experienced parents would be welcome. I don't think I can cope with many more sleepless nights

You mentioned: ".....My wife said she tried to leave her but she cries to the extend of turning herself blue and almost exploding...."

As already mentioned babies often go through this phase, but I hope you've had some medical checks to be sure there's nothing actually wrong.

As already suggested, changing to Soy milk to see if that helps sounds like it's worth a try.

Good luck.

[bina]

slept with each child until they were about 6 onths old; at first in same bed after in baby cot, with twins not sure how to do that but can be done also.... but definately sounds either colicky or some other type of physical discomfort: ears? does rocking and carrying work? if rocking and carrying dont work, then continue checking for what it could be but most babies settle in at some point. if its ears, that means that every time the baby lies down she will scream, but when upright, the crying also lessens ... pacifier? is she eating less then the other twin? some babies need meal times more often then others.

remember, babies dont read the books about babies so what works for one doesnt work for an other. u see it in litters of pups also, and in twin goats; so what works for boy twin might not be the thing for the girl twin, at any age... maybe just she has to sleep with mom for a few months until her night sleep settles in...contrary to popular belief, u can wean them off sleeping with u later on, it doesnt last until they are 18.

bina

israel

[finished]

I have a problem that has probably been faced by many many parents over the years, but never the less whilst it happens it is a real pain. We have two month old twins and one of them is giving us extreme trouble with sleepless nights. My son sleeps perfectly and gives us no bother at all. Our daughter is the exact opposite. She cry's on and off all night and is incredibly demanding. Both me and my wife have ages a decade or so in four weeks of missed sleep. Nothing seems to work. My question is, how far do we go in trying to let her cry and cry and cry to get out of being picked up and carried when she cry's? My wife said she tried to leave her but she cries to the extend of turning herself blue and almost exploding! Any ideas or opinion from experienced parents would be welcome. I don't think I can cope with many more sleepless nights

G/day ,, just read your message regarding sleepless nights ,, I have a booklet and C/D regarding this problem its called Sounds for Silence , Baby Settling and Health care A new and safe technique for soothing unsettled babies , worn out parents rejoice, my daughter was working for this company in Australia and i brought a copy with me to Thailand .. It is brand new and still in its packaging yours for the taking if interested ,, I too am in Ban Chang

[meadish_sweetball]

The methods described in 'The Happiest Baby on the Block' (briefly described below) worked really well for us. It involves a number of techniques that all serve to emulate the environment inside the womb.

The idea behind it is that during the first three months the child is more like a foetus than a human, they need lots of closeness and attention so try to give them as much of it as you possibly can. The techniques described in The Happiest Baby on the Block all are based on this idea.

The first point is to swaddle the child snugly in a light, soft piece of cloth so their arms and legs won't flail around (understanding that this movement is involuntary and stressful at first because the child is not actively telling its limbs to move, they do it by themselves). This creates a feeling of security.

The second point is to lay the baby, swaddled, on its side, in your lap, and rock the baby back and forth (a motion starting from the hip). The rocking motion is soothing and reminiscent of what it feels like to be inside the womb when the mother is moving around.

The third point is a little weird at first. Basically it is about bending down close to the child's head and 'hushing' loudly each time you breathe out - shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The required level of noise (at first, when the child is still screaming loudly) is much higher than what one would immediately think is comfortable or good for the child. But the purpose and effect of this is to emulate the sound of the blood wooshing past the child in the veins. Apparently this sound is really really loud inside the womb even though it cannot be heard outside. When your hushing is louder than the screams of the child, after a little while, as if by turning on a switch inside the baby's head, the screaming will stop. At that point you can lower the sound of the hushing. Subsequently, if necessary, counter each sob or attempt to scream again with a hushing sound of slightly higher level than the sound from the baby.

Essentially, the sound is like white noise, static - to this end, you can even buy machines that produce static, which will help soothe your baby to sleep. We never did that though. In combination with the snug swaddling and rocking motion from moving your knees back and forth, this method really calms a baby down - unless they scream because something actually IS seriously wrong... then you have to try to find out what.

This method worked really well for us during the first three months. Just swaddling your baby properly before going to sleep will help them sleep for longer periods of time.

Hope that helps.

[Sandstone Art]

I have a problem that has probably been faced by many many parents over the years, but never the less whilst it happens it is a real pain. We have two month old twins and one of them is giving us extreme trouble with sleepless nights. My son sleeps perfectly and gives us no bother at all. Our daughter is the exact opposite. She cry's on and off all night and is incredibly demanding. Both me and my wife have ages a decade or so in four weeks of missed sleep. Nothing seems to work. My question is, how far do we go in trying to let her cry and cry and cry to get out of being picked up and carried when she cry's? My wife said she tried to leave her but she cries to the extend of turning herself blue and almost exploding! Any ideas or opinion from experienced parents would be welcome. I don't think I can cope with many more sleepless nights

I fully understand your situation.

Baby cried for many reasons. They cannot tell us what's wrong and that's the main problem.

My twins were also giving me some problems when they were just 3 weeks old. It seems like they take turns! This week, the boy will cry and make a fuss. Next week will be the girl's turn!

Usually if they cried at night, it is that they are 'uncomfortable' . Did you change her diapers? Is her tummy blotted? ( with air from too much crying?) rub her tummy to soothe her.

Is there any insect bites? Or her clothing is causing some itch? Or she is alergic to her powder or baby samphoo? Did some sudden noise scare them and give them some fright ?

Light up your room dimly. Because sometimes they might wake up and does not like total darkness.

Check for small little things which you feel might irritates her.

Hold her and rock her gentley and sing her soft songs.

She needs a 'bonding' and also warm love from her parents. Hold her close to your heart. Let her listen to your heart beat.

I read that actually, the baby might be feeling all too quiet for her surroundings! With 9 months inside the womb of her mother, there are many 'sounds' she hears while still inside. So, suddenly all the sounds are gone after she is born and she is trying to adapt to her new surroundings. A small ticking clock nearby her might do the trick.

Luckily, my twins has passed that period.

Good Luck!

ps

Do not forget to let the mother have good rest too. Too much stress for her is not healthy . Try to get some additional helper/maids to take care in the day time ( off feeding time ) and let her have complete rest.

[Brigante7]

A dark room with just a hint of a night light outside, a soothing CD of baby songs played at a low level, a comfy chair and hold your child until she sleeps, spend some quality alone time with your daughter and while she is laying in your arms just taks to her, my son loved it when I just sat on a chair and talked to him.

Brigante7.

[johnnymoretti]

This is all phsycological! The baby cries because it's need attention, it's his only way of communicating with his parents.

Like described above, it's best to let the baby know something is there for him, this can be a radio for instance.

Sorry to say that this is not totally correct. It is not "ALL" psychological. There are many reasons why babies cry, and not only for attention. Coliccy babies are the main reason they cry for long periods. Other times, they just need another burping. Or even something under them is poking at them and they can't get comfortable. There are a myriad of reasons and since they can't express them in different terms, they cry.

If you are having trouble with frustration, seek professional help from a qualified doula or pediatrician.

Good luck to the original poster. We are lucky enough to have a relatively quiet baby...but she's only a month old and the future may hold a whole new world!!

Be patient. Be calm. Time will pass and she will get better. Endure the sleeplessness for awhile...after all, you were the one that brought her into this world.