Is Thaivisa Female-friendly?

[tgw]

And I really wish women would stop changing their names at marriage, to me that is the ultimate in submission.

What surname do you suggest is given to the children, I suggest your name as you would say the children do not belong to the man.

Plenty of children don't belong to the man whose name they bear.

Girls to have mother's name, boys to have man's, vice versa or combine the two names.

Or flip a coin, pick a new name .

Why is a human that a female gestates for nine months and then gives birth to expected to have the man's last name ?

To me, it is a sexist custom rooted in women as property.

Nah, it was a logic thing to do in a society run by men, since families wanted continuity. i.e the bakery "TigerWan" retains its name when Mr. TigerWan's son takes over. Sons stepping in their father's footsteps.

[bkkjames]

And I really wish women would stop changing their names at marriage, to me that is the ultimate in submission.

What surname do you suggest is given to the children, I suggest your name as you would say the children do not belong to the man.

Plenty of children don't belong to the man whose name they bear.

Girls to have mother's name, boys to have man's, vice versa or combine the two names.

Or flip a coin, pick a new name .

Why is a human that a female gestates for nine months and then gives birth to expected to have the man's last name ?

To me, it is a sexist custom rooted in women as property.

Then don't get married or change the rules. Bitching about it on TV certainly won't make men sit up and be more polite.

[Boo]

interestingly this topic has turned into another "what women should do, or think, or not do, or blah blaa blaa" when in fact the op was aimed at the male population on thaivisa & what they do & say.

Shocker that it turned into another "blame the woman" thread hey???

[tgw]

Nit picking over numbers is just silly. It doesn't MATTER if a moderator is male of female. All that matters is if the moderator is moderate and fair.

If there were more issues pertaining to women's interests then there would be more women on a forum. How many women do you see in fishing related topics, or most sports for that matter. Check on the magazine stands to see what issues that women are interested in. I could print out a set of requirements for 95% of all women's magazine articles and I wouldn't be far wrong.

1. 10 ways to please your special man in bed

2. 5 ways to have a firmer healthy body

3. 5 quick, nutricious meals for the active woman on the run

4. Choosing the right wardrobe for your body type

5. 4 gardening ideas to have a beautiful home

6. What Dr X can tell you about women's health issues

7. Raising a happy child while running a career

etc. etc. etc.

Agreed women are trained to thinkthis is the crap they should care about, but is it really?

I have to say since moving here, it became apparent dating was really not going to be happening anymore, so after about a year and a half I gave up trying to appear attractive, I'm still fit for my health's sake, but I don't shave my legs, my hair has gone to its natural colour, cut my nails off and only I wear make up when I go to a evening function , (about twice a year) and I could care less if my tan lines are halfway down my legs and that is liberating.

It takes so much effort and time to live up to this ideal of femininity that isn't real.

Is getting older for women actually a good thing ? ,

hmm.

it became apparent dating was really not going to be happening anymore

so you now partly feel like some men do (in the West)

do you feel the "dating" stopped because of overwhelming competition in Thailand?

where do you get your sex from, if I may ask?

Edited May 4, 2010 by tgw

[TigerWan]

Boo is well know for some very extreme views.

I am? how interesting what you perceive to be "extreme views".

I'll show her, " extreme" ... No one is more feminista than me !!

[sbk]

interestingly this topic has turned into another "what women should do, or think, or not do, or blah blaa blaa" when in fact the op was aimed at the male population on thaivisa & what they do & say.

Shocker that it turned into another "blame the woman" thread hey???

Now, now Boo. Who's to say that we should pay any attention to the OP and his question? It is, after all, only the title of the entire thread after all.

[bkkjames]

interestingly this topic has turned into another "what women should do, or think, or not do, or blah blaa blaa" when in fact the op was aimed at the male population on thaivisa & what they do & say.

Shocker that it turned into another "blame the woman" thread hey???

Let's turn it around.

By default we are being blamed for the reason why TV doesn't have many female members. Sorry to say that if this forum has evolved into something dominated my males, perhaps the owners etc should look inward instead of blaming the membership or trying to condition them.

Failing that, why not launch a site Ladiesonlythaivisa.com to ensure that you don't feel discriminated against.

Unbelievable.

[TigerWan]

Nit picking over numbers is just silly. It doesn't MATTER if a moderator is male of female. All that matters is if the moderator is moderate and fair.

If there were more issues pertaining to women's interests then there would be more women on a forum. How many women do you see in fishing related topics, or most sports for that matter. Check on the magazine stands to see what issues that women are interested in. I could print out a set of requirements for 95% of all women's magazine articles and I wouldn't be far wrong.

1. 10 ways to please your special man in bed

2. 5 ways to have a firmer healthy body

3. 5 quick, nutricious meals for the active woman on the run

4. Choosing the right wardrobe for your body type

5. 4 gardening ideas to have a beautiful home

6. What Dr X can tell you about women's health issues

7. Raising a happy child while running a career

etc. etc. etc.

Agreed women are trained to thinkthis is the crap they should care about, but is it really?

I have to say since moving here, it became apparent dating was really not going to be happening anymore, so after about a year and a half I gave up trying to appear attractive, I'm still fit for my health's sake, but I don't shave my legs, my hair has gone to its natural colour, cut my nails off and only I wear make up when I go to a evening function , (about twice a year) and I could care less if my tan lines are halfway down my legs and that is liberating.

It takes so much effort and time to live up to this ideal of femininity that isn't real.

Is getting older for women actually a good thing ? ,

hmm.

it became apparent dating was really not going to be happening anymore

so you now partly feel like a man.

do you feel the "dating" stopped because of overwhelming competition in Thailand?

where do you get your sex from, if I may ask?

No, you may not.

Huh, I don't feel like a man, unless you mean I now know what it's like to be alone ..

Mmm well I knew about that from before moving here for a few other reasons, mostly to do with living in a gay male enclave for over a decade..

And there's my ferocious independent streak that a lot of men aren't crazy about. And making alot of money, men don't like that either.

And being smart, I think that's the worse offense.

And yes , thousands of young, beautiful Thai women only too happy to act as household, personal and sexual servants is a fact of life here and I cannot compete.

I understand why so many go through the immigration humiliations..

[tgw]

Huh, I don't feel like a man, unless you mean I now know what it's like to be alone ..

Mmm well I knew about that from before moving here for a few other reasons, mostly to do with living in a gay male enclave for over a decade..

Interesting!

"feeling like a man" is not about "feeling alone", it is more about feeling not desired by the other sex.

i.e. when men walk around in the streets, there aren't lots of female eyes on them, craving for sex, as it is the other way around.

And there's my ferocious independent streak that a lot of men aren't crazy about. And making alot of money, men don't like that either. And being smart, I think that's the worse offense.

Sounds like we should have a coffee. I love intelligent & contradictory conversations.

What's your line of business in which you are so successful?

And yes, thousands of young, beautiful Thai women only too happy to act as household, personal and sexual servants is a fact of life here and I cannot compete.

I understand why so many go through the immigration humiliations..

now that sounds a bit resentful :-)

but I think we get to the core of the subject.

Edited May 4, 2010 by tgw

[Boo]

ahh did we upset you bkkjames by not tolerating being slagged off for no reason beyond the issues that exists in some posters psychy? The op made a valid point, there has been a gradual increase in general women hating post & posters over the last few weeks.

Seems my personal view to let a lot of stuff slide for the general benefit of the membership was foolish as some people just are unable to conduct themselves civilly. My bad & I shall be making effort from now on to rectify that.

[Lovedog100]

On a daily basis, I read posts which deride Thai women as being money-hungry scam artists, of being stupid, of being unable to love, and so on. I read posts which deride Western women as being sexless harpies who hate men, take everything in a divorce, are "fat, disgusting slobs," are "bitches," and so on.

I'm pretty sure that the men posting don't hate western women, but hate the western justice system that give the western women a 'free' house they never worked for. Similarly the men posting don't hate Thai women, but hate the system which forces the men to put houses in a Thai womans name, which is subsequently taken from them.

So I don't think it's really about hating women at all, but hating the perceived injustice in women taking houses from men for whatever reason. Some people express themselves badly and it looks like they blame the woman and not the system. Those who learn from past experience lose one house and move on.

Well said.

[ozzieovaseas]

On a daily basis, I read posts which deride Thai women as being money-hungry scam artists, of being stupid, of being unable to love, and so on. I read posts which deride Western women as being sexless harpies who hate men, take everything in a divorce, are "fat, disgusting slobs," are "bitches," and so on.

I'm pretty sure that the men posting don't hate western women, but hate the western justice system that give the western women a 'free' house they never worked for. Similarly the men posting don't hate Thai women, but hate the system which forces the men to put houses in a Thai womans name, which is subsequently taken from them.

So I don't think it's really about hating women at all, but hating the perceived injustice in women taking houses from men for whatever reason. Some people express themselves badly and it looks like they blame the woman and not the system. Those who learn from past experience lose one house and move on.

Well said.

Now where is the ??? poster when you need him??..i cant remember his name..

The guy that comes on here to constantly remind us that Thai women DONT demand OR take OR steal houses, money and gold..THEY ASK

poor guy must be sick of repeating himself by now

[TigerWan]

Then don't get married or change the rules. Bitching about it on TV certainly won't make men sit up and be more polite.

"Bitching"... there's another way men preclude women from the conversation.

I'm merely commenting on the status quo and why I think it is so.

So you sir, quit yer...

well see, there's no derogatory gender specific term for men complaining, is there?

[KarenBravo]

We have 96,000 members.

No you don't. That figure includes the thousands of banned members.

[tgw]

"not desired by the other sex" is the daily reality for most men in the west.

I am at best looking average.

On the first time I visited "Hollywood" disco in Bangkok, my back got gently scraped by long fingernails worn by a cute 20 year old Thai university student.

Never ever did that or anything close happen in the "west", even in my "good" days.

So... when confronted with that kind of differences between the western world and Thailand, do you expect men not to post their experiences and beginning to make comparisons and (probably abusive) generalizations?

In Germany, women often say "men are pigs".

There you go...

Edited May 4, 2010 by tgw

[TigerWan]

Huh, I don't feel like a man, unless you mean I now know what it's like to be alone ..

Mmm well I knew about that from before moving here for a few other reasons, mostly to do with living in a gay male enclave for over a decade..

Interesting!

"feeling like a man" is not about "feeling alone", it is more about feeling not desired by the other sex.

i.e. when men walk around in the streets, there aren't lots of female eyes on them, craving for sex, as it is the other way around.

And there's my ferocious independent streak that a lot of men aren't crazy about. And making alot of money, men don't like that either. And being smart, I think that's the worse offense.

Sounds like we should have a coffee. I love intelligent & contradictory conversations.

What's your line of business in which you are so successful?

And yes, thousands of young, beautiful Thai women only too happy to act as household, personal and sexual servants is a fact of life here and I cannot compete.

I understand why so many go through the immigration humiliations..

now that sounds a bit resentful :-)

but I think we get to the core of the subject.

The core of what subject , why women aren't posting on Thai Visa ?

You're really just trying to be incendiary , trolling I think it is called in the forum vernacular?

I think it is liberating to no longer be concerned about attracting the men Thai women are so concerned about attracting.

[tgw]

You're really just trying to be incendiary , trolling I think it is called in the forum vernacular?

No, I'm not actively trying to be like that.

Could you explain what makes you feel that way?

I am honestly interested in knowing about what you think is infuriating in my posts.

And the reply to this question is at the very core of the topic.

You think I am trolling and incendiary, and I have the feeling of just explaining my point of view and asking questions I am genuinely interested in.

So... where is the friction point?

Edited May 4, 2010 by tgw

[Old Croc]

It's not just Thai Visa- Sexism and misogyny is prevalent throughout all cultures.

As an intelligent woman who is independent and participates in horse riding sports which men and women compete in together, I find women's equality is taking huge strides backwards from my high school days in the late 70's.

All the women I knew then were " feminists". Now the term has been demonized to "Feminazi" whenever women's groups decry their ongoing status as sexual playthings. "Hotties, babes..."etc., etc., etc..

At the risk of incurring the wrath of the mods, look at the ads on this site for " girls" which is a term prevalent in the English language that diminishes adult women.

Girl used to mean a female child.

Seems if you are attractive you are a girl, after you become to old to be considered attractive, then you become " lady" and are expected to behave in certain ways .

To be just a woman, simply a female of the species, seems to be unattainable.

Before I get the onslaught of negative comments deriding my companion status- let me clarify my feminist stance;

Let me say I think prostitution should be legalized, criminalizing it only victimizes the women

and there should be free birth control and access to abortion.

In fact, I'm now reading FREAKonomics which features a convincing argument that US crimes rates dropped significantly in the early 90's due to the national legalization of abortion in the early 70's.

And I really wish women would stop changing their names at marriage, to me that is the ultimate in submission.

Men's titles are not tied in with their marital status. They are Mr. not like women who are Miss if unmarried, Mrs. if married.

Please call me Ms. - marital status none of anyone's business -

No such option in Thailand, however, though the Kuhn titling seems to be gender -free

Maybe we could all just be M.?

Haven't you been banned at least twice from this forum HorseDoctor?

[SiamRose]

I think it is liberating to no longer be concerned about attracting the men

I agree.

Thai women are so concerned about attracting.

Well some are and others are not. Generalizing could be offensive to Thai women, and TV might lose some potential new menbers.

Edited May 4, 2010 by SiamRose

[sarahsbloke]

Boo Says

My bad & I shall be making effort from now on to rectify that. smile.gif

As long as you warn/ban all people who make comments about 'western men' for being racists (because we both know what 'western men' really means), I would be totally happy. Along with generalisations about fat, bald, over 50s men, etc.

Feel free, ban/warn men ban/warn women, finally a bit of equality for men on Thaivisa!

Can I help, in case you miss a few posts accidentally?

Edited May 4, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[tgw]

hehe...

Statements which use the words all, always, never, none, everyone, etc. (=generalizations) are *mostly* untrue, few exceptions

I consider them to be lies and either a mark of intellectual dishonesty/bad faith or of too low intelligence to grasp that reality is a continuous statistical realm and not black & white - sometimes both.

And simple solutions are *usually* wrong as well.

Edited May 4, 2010 by tgw

[villagefarang]

To the OP. This touchy-feely, political correctness that you aspire too seems a bit naive for a forum like this.

It could be argued that much of TV's success comes from being an outlet for unhappy and uninformed people. If we all sat around patting each other on the back, my guess is that page-views would go down tremendously. If we never repeated topics, we would have run out of topics, long ago. TV depends on newbies and their inane questions and on a certain amount of controversy.

As you say, women are a very small minority here yet are given much more weight than seems their due. I feel TV is overly accommodating to the female point of view and their particular sensitivities. Life is not fair and not all people are provided with equal opportunity or potential. Deal with it.

Edited May 4, 2010 by villagefarang

[sarahsbloke]

Village says

TV's success comes from being an outlet for unhappy and uniformed people

What sort of uniformed people are we talking about, police, army, red-shirts.

(only joking)

[Boo]

sarahsbloke, 27 males mods. why haven't you ever asked one of them to act on all these posts you claim are against western men?

But as per forum advice, feel free to use the report button & whatever mod picks it up will deal with it, regardless of gender

[villagefarang]

Village says

TV's success comes from being an outlet for unhappy and uniformed people

What sort of uniformed people are we talking about, police, army, red-shirts.

(only joking)

Thanks for proofreading for me.

[sarahsbloke]

Village says

TV's success comes from being an outlet for unhappy and uniformed people

.. and then SB says

What sort of uniformed people are we talking about, police, army, red-shirts.

(only joking)

.. and then Village says

Thanks for proofreading for me. smile.gif

Sorry, you got me thinking Village People gay fantasy uniforms now

Let me think ... Native American, telephone repair man, motorcycle policeman ..... what were the others?

Edited May 4, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[somtampet]

I'll have to admit a large number of expats I've run in to over the years have a nasty streak running through them. Either complete contempt for Thai people, being so full of bullshit they could keep a rose nursery fertilized for years or just downright stitch up artistes. My tolerance level for these types is exactly zero. Life is waaaaaay too short to listen to their crap.

The amount of <deleted> written on here by some tells me more about the poster themselves than any comment they may have on Thai women etc.

A large number

Where do you go to meet these people,i know hardly any

Amazed the mods/global thingys too,allow this to happen as this site is tighter than a ducks arse

[neverdie]

hey bonobo, What can of worms are you going to open tommorrow?

[villagefarang]

sarahsbloke, 27 males mods. why haven't you ever asked one of them to act on all these posts you claim are against western men?

But as per forum advice, feel free to use the report button & whatever mod picks it up will deal with it, regardless of gender

Perhaps men are more willing to take our lumps and not run to the mods crying about some perceived slight. Reporting the slightest little thing seems weak and petty. If that makes one feel more powerful then have at it but many of us prefer not to stoop that low.

[Ulysses G.]

I have also met a good number of men who read the forum frequently, but are just too intimidated to post on TV. They feel that they will most likely be attacked and ridiculed, so they just don't bother. Thai Visa is pretty equal opportunity when it comes to bashing.