Why Are The Loudest Screamers About Gays Always Caught Having Gay Sex?

[sbk]

The list is endless, with the christian Ted Haggard in the US being one that springs immediately to mind, but you see it all the time. The men who scream the loudest about how awful homosexuality is are always the ones engaging in it even while screaming about it.

What is that all about? It seems to me that if you want to be secretly gay you wouldn't draw attention to yourself. Or if you have homosexual tendencies and this scares you into being anti -gay you wouldn't then engage in the behavior.

Or am I just applying too much logic to this?

[ProThaiExpat]

A very good question.

Probably more than one answer depending on the individual involved.

If it is a politician, then he may be "beating the drum" to get elected in a bible belt area. If he has been raised in a strict christian-judean family, he may have strong guilt issues and self hatred resulting in denial and repression which boils over in episodic gay acts that only fuels the self loathing and loathing for those who share his proclivities.

There may psychiatrically trained members who may be able to explain the reasons or not as human behavior is extremely complex and difficult to explain in many instances.

Ray Cohn and J. Edgar Hoover did a great deal more damage, in my view, than Haggard, as he was basically "preaching to the choir" while those other two had positions of real power that they used to hurt people in many ways.

[Ijustwannateach]

As per rules regarding the gay subforum (check and see if you wish- gays are not required to 'defend' themselves against homophobic BS here), a post and its consequences have been removed and a warning issued.

Be VERY CAREFUL to obey the subforum rules when posting in this forum.

[Ijustwannateach]

By the way, a great pleasure to see you back, PTE- it's been too long.

Getting back to the topic: I think it has to do with the TREMENDOUS pressure in the English-speaking context for men to define their masculine sexuality publicly in large part not only by appreciation of women but also by denial and oppression of homosexuality. If you don't make gay jokes you're not 'one of the boys'. Even for guys who eventually identify as gay, the internalised homophobia is a major stumbling block. For example, when I was first coming to terms with my own feelings, for several years even after I had started dating other guys I still felt vaguely uncomfortable or guilty seeing two guys kiss in a movie.

It is not unknown for guys to go home with other guys, have sex with them, and then be exposed to insane verbal or even physical abuse by the other guy who blames them for 'making' them do those things (once the passion of the moment is gone). Happened to me once in a mild-ish kind of way. Would imagine those preacher types are like that.

[seedy]

I would think that fear would be the deciding factor.

These people have sexual urges. They act on said urges. After the fact, the guilt of what they 'Think' they should be doing is in conflict with what they have just done.

A direct result of fanaticism I believe, at least in members of the "Religious Right". The dogma insists on a 'Don't do this, Do that ...' behavior, and any deviation from that results in tremendous guilt.

If these men could accept these feelings in themselves, there would not be a problem.

[britmaveric]

American Beauty comes to mind whenever this subject arises... the Anti-Gay Col is a fine example. He shows extreme anti-gay hatred, but is actually gay. I think it has more to do with self-loathing than anything else. They are fighting who they are and do not want to accept it.

[Jingthing]

The most dramatic way to "prove" to the world that you aren't gay is to bash gays. This is why OUTING closet cases who are actively anti-gay is really worth doing.

[PhilHarries]

Who cares?

People have been setting themselves up on pedestals on a whole range of issues since the beginning of mankind.

Those that build the highest pedestal are most in the public eye especially so when they fall.

Homo Sapiens is the most adept species on Earth at shooting itself in the foot.

[Jingthing]

Who cares? Are you joking? Check out the background of the latest closet gay hater. He was actively promoting anti-gay oppression. Of course we care!

[OriginalPoster]

It's easy to understand. You'll see the same thing with older Germans that had Jewish parents or grandparents, they often are the worst anti-Semites. It's all about defending yourself by diverting attention and pointing the finger at other people.

[Asthecrowflys]

It's easy to understand. You'll see the same thing with older Germans that had Jewish parents or grandparents, they often are the worst anti-Semites. It's all about defending yourself by diverting attention and pointing the finger at other people.

Your right about this,a large % of those shouting are diverting attention

True story...........

A married man from my home town use to tell stories about other men,was very good at telling tales (had a silver tongue),and you know if a lie is told and its repeated enough times people start to believe them!

Over a period of maybe 10 years he made life very difficult for some people (in my home town gays are not accepted at all),some of the men had to leave,he ruined 2 marriages,and one very young man attempted suicide because he was bullied so much!

But you know the truth always comes out in the end,and it did! He came out of the closet some time later and had to leave town

before something happened to him!

There were a lot of red faces around town after that,some people felt very foolish for helping this man spread his gossip.

The last i heard of him he was living here in Thailand,Chiang Mai or Chiang Rai Area!

[dsprtliving]

I think it is about self hatred a lot of the times on a personal or private level, but with these guys i'm not so sure if that's the case. Generally, I'd say that if one is taking every chance one gets to point out or highlight the perceived flaw in others, then there is less a chance the public will notice me. It is about not being noticed, but these guys seem to thrive off creating/feeding the hatred. They seem to enjoy the spotlight, get on their pedestals and make entire careers out of persecuting our community. Maybe a some some sort of narcissistic reward for self hating behavior?

[Samuian]

FEAR!

public figure FEARS nothing more than being outed as a gay in a society where being gay is worse than being an alien!

It's not the open denying, the lies, it's NOT the fear, it's the society which frowns upon people who don't fit the preset rules, the sheer pressure which is caused by society onto the individual!

Free, freedom, open society, this society is what is sick to it's bones... never became a witness of a greater lie by all these "honest, god fearing" people.... "oh' dear, it's a giant comedy!"... all these pretenders out there!

[mrdome]

It's been proven that those who score the highest on a homophobia test also appear to be aroused by homoerotic images. Now this contradiction and inner pressure is a sure ticket into a secret double life.

Can I back this up? Sure can:

http://www.philosophy-religion.org/handouts/homophobia.htm

[ProThaiExpat]

Thank you mrdome for the article. It seems quite valid including the caveat that anxiety as a causative factor in male erections needed to be further evaluated.

Yes, a straight man raised to fear and demonize homosexuality may well fee anxiety when shown homosexual porn. The question raised in my mind is why there was such a high proportion of homophobic men getting erections from anxiety in the study. Of course, the studies methodology needs to be understood more as we don't know how the selection process was made between homophobic men and non-homophobic men that were used in the study. Were there childhood rearing factors involved that would explain the 'anxiety"? Were the homophobic men taken from the student body of Oral Roberts University? Surely a study could be conducted to determine what the anxiety causing factors were and thereby eliminate the anxiety factor as a cause of the erections. Thus the researchers properly invited further studies.

I for one, find anxiety to be, if anything, destructive of erections.

[Fookhaht]

This human trait is as old as human nature and goes way beyond the subject of homophobia.

I think Shakespeare said it best 400 years ago in Hamlet, Act III, Scene II::

"The lady doth protest too much, methinks."....The phrase has come to mean that one can "insist so passionately about something not being true that people suspect the opposite of what one is saying." --Wikepedia

And, IMHO, the suspecting hearers are usually right! Edited June 5, 2010 by Fookhaht

[ProThaiExpat]

One of my favorites is the response to an aggressive sexual advance or attack "Stop it, I love it"!!!!

[elshaheen]

Why are gays the loudest when having gay sex. When they meet their beautiful date for the first time and get back to some place suitable and they forget to turn out the lights one of them suddenly discovers. His date is a hermaphrodite and you had other visions of your perfect date.

[Jingthing]

Why are gays the loudest when having gay sex. When they meet their beautiful date for the first time and get back to some place suitable and they forget to turn out the lights one of them suddenly discovers. His date is a hermaphrodite and you had other visions of your perfect date.

Was that supposed to be funny? Just checking.

[freethefour]

In my experience the ones who shout the loudest about gays usually just

do not like the idea of a same sex relationship. Most people of christian

faith and especially muslim do not like homosexuality.

Personally I do not mind gay people, not sure if thats because I am

secure with my sexuality or just quite liberal.

[ProThaiExpat]

Here is a news item that underscores one of the reasons so many are conflicted by their sexual urges when it comes to their religious upbringing and when they are under the influence of ardent homophobic religious organizations.

Screaming loudly from the pulpit while quietly coming to terms with the way God created them. Just another crime against humanity committed by humans in power in organized religion.

Minn. pastor likely to keep job despite gay report | News Story on 365gay.com

Edited June 24, 2010 by ProThaiExpat