Chiang Mai Forum

[LaraC]

I would just like to know why this forum seems to have so many unfriendly negative members. Im sorry if that sounds blunt and direct, but i read from time to time and im often shocked by so many unnecessarily negative comments. I rarely post (like many of my friends who have said they stay away from here because of the bad attitude), because i know that regardless of what i post it will likely receieve some stupid bitter responses, for no reason other than to offer a bitter negative comment (ie: for no practical benefit).

The assumptions and sanctimonious attitudes beggar belief. Is it really so hard to actually offer practical helpful useful advice? Or, just an idea, learn to step off the soap box and say nothing at all when you have nothing helpful to say..?

Just take a good look at this forum if you dont know what im talking about.

So many members veiws that i enjoyed reading seemed to have faded away, chased out by the petty hypocritical comments of so many of the resident grouches. Is life really that bloody awful that you have to spout off at every opportunity? If so, im so sorry for you guys, because life (particularly life in Chiang Mai), is so beautiful that it all i can do is smile.

Go ahead and flame me, if it makes you feel good, its water off a ducks back. Because, i, unlike many members, am not affected by the ramblings of bitter folk, but sadly it chases away so many members that would likely have positive contributions to make.

Happy Loy Krathong.

[Thailand]

I'm with you.

The number of my posts and the time I have been a member gives a clue. Sadly with so many members on TV the dross seem to scare away those who would really want to contribute.

That said, plenty of good info if you want to sift away, and a lot of good people.You really don't need to contribute if that's how you feel.But hopefully if you have something that may be of interest or of benefit to others do post it.

There is always the "ignore' button for those that deserve it.

Edited November 21, 2010 by Thailand

[caf]

The mods do try but it cant be an easy job

Using ignore button means you may lose the jist of the developing thread

Easier said than done, I agree, but just ignoring the actual post is probably the most pragmatic option. But that's not always easy if you are being flamed or just getting negative responses.

Reporting the post is an option but how effective??

[MrBrad]

Well said, LaraC and Thailand. I, too, wonder why churlish comments are so frequently found here. And, I've also been reluctant to contribute at times for that very reason.

[chiangmaitoughguy]

Agreed, and I know exactly what sparked you off this morning, (Lost dog, # 3) am I right?

Pointless comment to make, the person was just doing it for a reaction coz their life is obviously so fruitless.

Don't let it get you down, as Thailand says, just sift through and take in the useful stuff.

Happy Loi Kratong.

[MagnumForce]

I'm with you OP. There's some awful <deleted> on this forum and on this whole website. Myself included, as no doubt someone will point out so I thought I'd save them the trouble. A lot of people on here have too much time on their hands because they married a tart who doesn't love them but they think she's gorgeous or they own a moderately successful business or they're just completely socially inept and they can't make friends in real life so they post on here to make themselves feel that bit special and try to have friends. If you take a look at the stats of the folks who post most often on here you might notice that they log on about 6am and never seem to log off for the whole day.

On the upside, TV is a very valuable source of information and is probably the main reason most of us joined in the first place. Unfortunately, some people feel the need to reply to everything posted on here, usefully or not.

Have a Happy Loy Krathong. I'm going to have a nice cup of tea and wait for the inevitable. I would suggest to the OP that you log off and go for a nice walk around town and you will meet some really nice real people.

Regards,

MF

[wimpy]

I'm with you.

The number of my posts and the time I have been a member gives a clue. Sadly with so many members on TV the dross seem to scare away those who would really want to contribute.

That said, plenty of good info if you want to sift away, and a lot of good people.You really don't need to contribute if that's how you feel.But hopefully if you have something that may be of interest or of benefit to others do post it.

There is always the "ignore' button for those that deserve it.

I don't see the ignore button. Where is it?

[iSabai]

I'm with you OP. There's some awful <deleted> on this forum and on this whole website. Myself included, as no doubt someone will point out so I thought I'd save them the trouble. A lot of people on here have too much time on their hands because they married a tart who doesn't love them but they think she's gorgeous or they own a moderately successful business or they're just completely socially inept and they can't make friends in real life so they post on here to make themselves feel that bit special and try to have friends. If you take a look at the stats of the folks who post most often on here you might notice that they log on about 6am and never seem to log off for the whole day.

On the upside, TV is a very valuable source of information and is probably the main reason most of us joined in the first place. Unfortunately, some people feel the need to reply to everything posted on here, usefully or not.

Have a Happy Loy Krathong. I'm going to have a nice cup of tea and wait for the inevitable. I would suggest to the OP that you log off and go for a nice walk around town and you will meet some really nice real people.

Regards,

MF

Pretty well said MF. I would also add that it seems to be the nature of any forums you read (nasty comments), whether about Thailand or anything else. I guess the anonymity of it brings out the worst of folks.

It's just a matter of ignoring the flamers and negative people. Not easy to do sometimes, takes practice and some self control.

[thinkinofstayin]

If you walked into a strange bar and instead of finding a couple of like-minded people to chat to you stood on a chair and addressed the whole crowd you wouldn't be surprised if some hecklers, drunks, and <deleted> made disparaging remarks, would you? Well, that's what you're doing on a forum. You're not just chatting with your friends you're talking to everyone in the room. Some will agree with you, some will ignore you and some will give you stick. Just like a bar, if the hecklers get out of control, the bar owner will warn them or ban them - on a forum that is the moderators job. Does it make more sense now?

Edited November 21, 2010 by thinkinofstayin

[Gladiator]

Lara,

All cudos to you. I believe that you have expressed what many other posters, including myself also think, but for whatever reason have never posted.

In some ways this and other forums reminds reminds me of the old joke about a semi-silent, Monastic Order.

The monks only have one opportunity, every five years, to get up and say something.

The first year - one monk gets up and says - "I don't know about the rest of you but I think that the food here is bloody awful!"

Five years elapse.

The next opportunity, the next monk gets up and says - "I happen to disagree - I think that it is very good!" and sits down

Five years elapse.

The third Monk gets up and says - "I'm out of here - There is too much bitching!"

The sad thing in that many members, and even Newbies, who probably have much to contribute are put off and either disappear or just lurk.

Gladiator

[villagefarang]

Hang out in the Chiang Rai forum. We are a much more civilized bunch of ne'er-do-wells. The only problem being, nothing much happens around here.

[Asmerom]

If you walked into a strange bar and instead of finding a couple of like-minded people to chat to you stood on a chair and addressed the whole crowd you wouldn't be surprised if some hecklers, drunks, and <deleted> made disparaging remarks, would you? Well, that's what you're doing on a forum. You're not just chatting with your friends you're talking to everyone in the room. Some will agree with you, some will ignore you and some will give you stick. Just like a bar, if the hecklers get out of control, the bar owner will warn them or ban them - on a forum that is the moderators job. Does it make more sense now?

Exactly. Excellent comparison. Why on earth should anyone expect this forum to be composed of paragons of politeness eager to dispense goodness and mercy to all and sundry? It mostly, with a few notable exceptions, consists of human beings and will unsurprisingly reflect the various vices and virtues of the species.

If it really was "the missing dog thread" that caused the OP's indignant outburst then she/he would have to explain why , having received nine most helpful replies only one of which was "negative" her/his sensitivities were aroused sufficiently to generate such an indignant post.

I won't repeat Hamlet's advice to Ophelia here, that would be ungenerous but I don't think Mother Theresa would have felt at all comfortable consorting with the likes of us even though in my opinion, there really isn't enough bad behaviour to get too upset about.

And I agree with all those who advise ignoring such attacks ; sometimes difficult if directed at oneself but a mature reaction. On the othe hand, I do welcome the OP's post as there's no harm in our being chastised occcaisionaly. How's that for a bit of sanctimonious twaddle? I know what you'e thinking so I got in before you.

[caf]

If you walked into a strange bar and instead of finding a couple of like-minded people to chat to you stood on a chair and addressed the whole crowd you wouldn't be surprised if some hecklers, drunks, and <deleted> made disparaging remarks, would you? Well, that's what you're doing on a forum. You're not just chatting with your friends you're talking to everyone in the room. Some will agree with you, some will ignore you and some will give you stick. Just like a bar, if the hecklers get out of control, the bar owner will warn them or ban them - on a forum that is the moderators job. Does it make more sense now?

Exactly. Excellent comparison. Why on earth should anyone expect this forum to be composed of paragons of politeness eager to dispense goodness and mercy to all and sundry? It mostly, with a few notable exceptions, consists of human beings and will unsurprisingly reflect the various vices and virtues of the species.

If it really was "the missing dog thread" that caused the OP's indignant outburst then she/he would have to explain why , having received nine most helpful replies only one of which was "negative" her/his sensitivities were aroused sufficiently to generate such an indignant post.

I won't repeat Hamlet's advice to Ophelia here, that would be ungenerous but I don't think Mother Theresa would have felt at all comfortable consorting with the likes of us even though in my opinion, there really isn't enough bad behaviour to get too upset about.

And I agree with all those who advise ignoring such attacks ; sometimes difficult if directed at oneself but a mature reaction. On the othe hand, I do welcome the OP's post as there's no harm in our being chastised occcaisionaly. How's that for a bit of sanctimonious twaddle? I know what you'e thinking so I got in before you.

Neither the op ,nor the silent majority on here, nor those who have put their thoughts to words - none have spoken of expecting the forum to be composed of paragons of politeness. What was expressed was an expectation or hope that rudeness and flaming in all its forms could be avoided.

Your point that some posters are not human is noted. Why you posted the point does not seem too positive.

You are making a supposition that the missing dog thread initiated the op's post. I think he was generalising, probably over a long period of time during his forum membership. That does not make his view indignant. The metaphors on Hamlet and Mother Theresa show your wide reading but are not really apt. And I think you might have meant ingenuous not ungenerous.

Your post was a bit "attacking" and I think gives the op his point.

[Lannatyne]

Hello you northerners!

I usually only post on Phuket Forum as that's where I am, but I've posted on here today due to a travel route request. Noticed your post about negativity etc, etc.

Hey, just want to reassure you that it's just as bad down our neck of the woods. Many doom and gloom merchants, but experts in every field all the same. Thing is, the rest of what i consider to be 'normal' members all know who the cantankerous <deleted> are. It's the same ones who come back with inane and useless comments about nearly every post.

Some people know everything about everything, and some people know everything about nothing.

Will be up Pai & MHS just before Christmas for a holiday, so ensure it's nice and cool for me! Have a 100 baht bet with my wife that I'll never wear a jumper in Thailand. She reckons the 100 baht is as good as in the bag, but I really don't think I'll need it.

Have fun.

[thinkinofstayin]

duplicate post

Edited November 21, 2010 by thinkinofstayin

[thinkinofstayin]

Neither the op ,nor the silent majority on here, nor those who have put their thoughts to words - none have spoken of expecting the forum to be composed of paragons of politeness. What was expressed was an expectation or hope that rudeness and flaming in all its forms could be avoided.

Your point that some posters are not human is noted. Why you posted the point does not seem too positive.

You are making a supposition that the missing dog thread initiated the op's post. I think he was generalising, probably over a long period of time during his forum membership. That does not make his view indignant. The metaphors on Hamlet and Mother Theresa show your wide reading but are not really apt. And I think you might have meant ingenuous not ungenerous.

Your post was a bit "attacking" and I think gives the op his point.

I don't see the post of Asmeron as being "not too positive" or "attacking", but you obviously do. That's the point of a forum, people see things differently, have different opinions and different ways of expression. For example, to me, your post comes across as being a bit sanctimonious, but others may not agree. Such is life.

[orang37]

Sawasdee Khrup, Khun Lara C,

Welcome to on-line forums ! Even with moderation in place you will find some posters whose main specialty is negativity, off-topic rambles: that's just par for the course.

Assuming this entire post was not just "pouting" because you did not get responded to, or catered to ... on some other post ... the way you expected to ... or because you are addicted to some flavour of "narcissistic political correctness" which gives you the "rush" of feeling : "self-righteous" and/or "egregiously wounded" by (your choice of ...) cretins, barbarians, chauvinists, morons, unwashed, uneducated, uncultured ... and so froth ...

You are not a passive 'victim' of other people's on-line behavior here.

Think of ThaiVisa's forums as being like a "radio:" you choose to "turn the set on:" you choose to listen/read.

And you have control: anyone who posts, whose posts you don't like, for whatever reason, can be:

1. if you feel their post violates the forum rules: reported to the moderators

2. you can go into your profile and block posters you don't want to read , as well as block posters from sending private messages to you.

So, with a minimum of effort on your part, you can never see posts from people who you don't want to ever read.

If you are walking down a sidewalk, and observe fresh dog poop, do you step around it, or walk through it, while cursing dogs ?

In this case you can make the equivalent of what, for you, is "fresh dog poop" invisible Now, ain't that Magic

We've had lots of fun here on TV CM, made new friends, exchanged valuable information, engaged in a few little slightly pugilistic tete-a-tetes. Some people we blocked out two or three years ago, are no longer blocked (did we change ... or did they change ... we don't know).

While we hope that the cosmic singularity that fused a dying human and a dying orang into one aging human male meat package now containing two complete minds and souls, us, has been entertaining for some, we realize that for others it may be just boring or worse, but, to only slightly modify what Rhett Butler said, so succinctly, to Scarlett in "Gone With the Wind:" "Frankly, Scarlett, We don't give a dam_n."

Make ThaiVisa CM the forum you want it to be by filtering out what you don't like, ignoring what you don't like, and showing us, by personal example, what you do like.

Quit whining, and contribute something that feels positive to you.

best, ~o:37;

Edited November 21, 2010 by orang37

[sarahsbloke]

If you are walking down a sidewalk, and observe fresh dog poop, do you step around it, or walk through it, while cursing dogs ?

In this case you can make the equivalent of what, for you, is "fresh dog poop" invisible Now, ain't that Magic

best, ~o:37;

Very nice post Orange ....... only problem is ...... I understood you, you must be slipping (but hopefully not in dog poop!)

[Beetlejuice]

I'm with you OP. There's some awful <deleted> on this forum and on this whole website. Myself included, as no doubt someone will point out so I thought I'd save them the trouble. A lot of people on here have too much time on their hands because they married a tart who doesn't love them but they think she's gorgeous or they own a moderately successful business or they're just completely socially inept and they can't make friends in real life so they post on here to make themselves feel that bit special and try to have friends. If you take a look at the stats of the folks who post most often on here you might notice that they log on about 6am and never seem to log off for the whole day.

On the upside, TV is a very valuable source of information and is probably the main reason most of us joined in the first place. Unfortunately, some people feel the need to reply to everything posted on here, usefully or not.

Have a Happy Loy Krathong. I'm going to have a nice cup of tea and wait for the inevitable. I would suggest to the OP that you log off and go for a nice walk around town and you will meet some really nice real people.

Regards,

MF

This is simply untrue.

I never married but live with a tart who doesn't love me, except when I cough up some cash and like you I'm a born again <deleted>, so what's wrong in that?

And to top it all, my tart's not even gorgeous, so I'm a double <deleted>. It is true about coming on here because they have no friends. I've always wanted a best friend, but because I suffered from so much abuse, beatings, sent down the mines at 8 years old and having to share a tent with 4 Aunts and 13 cousins when a teen has left it`s toll. People just hate me after a while, so Thai visa is the only place I can make people listen to my crap points of view that has no relevance to anything. I mean, where else can people like me go?

To be honest, I found that by keeping away from the food threads and those in your face sponsor threads, the Chiang Mai crowd are a pretty OK bunch.

Yes, that was me that made the remark on the dog lost thread, but I explained my reasons and apologised for that.

I`m off to a Loy Krathong party and our yearly tie the firework to the cat`s tail ceremony.

Can`t wait until it ends so I can return and tell everyone all about it. Probably around 6.00am time.

Edited November 21, 2010 by Beetlejuice

[Old Croc]

At least you CMers are able to put aside your differences long enough to organise a sponsored Xmas party where you can get together in numbers and discuss your differences face to face.

Phuket TVer's are so ornery they haven't had a get together in years and are unlikely to do so again. The mere suggestion from someone about having a party is practically greeted with death threats.

IF CM had an ocean I'd be there.

[jdinasia]

At least you CMers are able to put aside your differences long enough to organise a sponsored Xmas party where you can get together in numbers and discuss your differences face to face.

Phuket TVer's are so ornery they haven't had a get together in years and are unlikely to do so again. The mere suggestion from someone about having a party is practically greeted with death threats.

IF CM had an ocean I'd be there.

But when this curmudgeonly old expat was in Phuket ..... well meeting OldCroc was great!

[isanbirder]

Clique? That's forums for you. Ignore the negativity; I do.

[Asmerom]

This is simply untrue.

I never married but live with a tart who doesn't love me, except when I cough up some cash and like you I'm a born again <deleted>, so what's wrong in that?

And to top it all, my tart's not even gorgeous, so I'm a double <deleted>. It is true about coming on here because they have no friends. I've always wanted a best friend, but because I suffered from so much abuse, beatings, sent down the mines at 8 years old and having to share a tent with 4 Aunts and 13 cousins when a teen has left it`s toll. People just hate me after a while, so Thai visa is the only place I can make people listen to my crap points of view that has no relevance to anything. I mean, where else can people like me go?

To be honest, I found that by keeping away from the food threads and those in your face sponsor threads, the Chiang Mai crowd are a pretty OK bunch.

Yes, that was me who make the remark on the dog lost thread, but I explained my reasons and apologised for that.

I`m off to a Loy Krathong party and our yearly tie the firework to the cat`s tail ceremony.

Can`t wait until it ends so I can return and tell everyone all about it.

Great post. I love it. Like that Pillion thread. Deserves a medal. You'll be delighted to know "the dog" turned up. Altogether you've quite redeemed yourself so you can get off the naughty step and off to the party.Can't wait to hear all about it as there's no one here to talk to.

[PlanetX]

This is simply untrue.

I never married but live with a tart who doesn't love me, except when I cough up some cash and like you I'm a born again <deleted>, so what's wrong in that?

And to top it all, my tart's not even gorgeous, so I'm a double <deleted>. It is true about coming on here because they have no friends. I've always wanted a best friend, but because I suffered from so much abuse, beatings, sent down the mines at 8 years old and having to share a tent with 4 Aunts and 13 cousins when a teen has left it`s toll. People just hate me after a while, so Thai visa is the only place I can make people listen to my crap points of view that has no relevance to anything. I mean, where else can people like me go?

To be honest, I found that by keeping away from the food threads and those in your face sponsor threads, the Chiang Mai crowd are a pretty OK bunch.

Yes, that was me who make the remark on the dog lost thread, but I explained my reasons and apologised for that.

I`m off to a Loy Krathong party and our yearly tie the firework to the cat`s tail ceremony.

Can`t wait until it ends so I can return and tell everyone all about it.

Great post. I love it. Like that Pillion thread. Deserves a medal. You'll be delighted to know "the dog" turned up. Altogether you've quite redeemed yourself so you can get off the naughty step and off to the party.Can't wait to hear all about it as there's no one here to talk to.

I had a good hamburger today

Edited November 21, 2010 by PlanetX

[millwall_fan]

Ok, there are a few guys on this forum who should get out more, but in the main, i think most posts are answered honestly and to the satisafaction of the members. This forum is the best way to find out what is happening in

Chiang Mai. We'd all miss it if it wasn't here

If I might say so OP, your post is rather negative!!

[walt]

... I'm a born again <deleted> ...

... People just hate me after a while, so Thai visa is the only place I can make people listen to my crap points of view that has [sic] no relevance to anything. I mean, where else can people like me go? ...

Hi Beetlejuice,

This is just to let you know that I think your posts are entertaining. I like them. I hope that doesn't upset your self image.

Best,

Walt

[realthaideal]

You get out of TV or the CM subforum what you put into it. It's that simple.

I think it's a shame that I have quite a few friends, most of them ladies, who have registered, but mainly lurk, and then others who just won't register because of the old curmudgeony male spirit here. If the few loud, rotten apples keep all the good ones away, then it becomes the rotten apples forum. I always find this a great place to learn what to do, where to go, how to get something done in CM. And likewise, when I have a question I get great info in the responses. And then there are the just silly threads and posters, and then the ones I wish weren't there at all. But I look at the sunny side of things and use TV for what I want, and don't pay much heed to those that don't deserve my attention.

If you like the idea, but not the current populace, stay on n fight on for the good ! We need all the sane ppl we can get !

[jayjay0]

Well I certainly agree with the OP. How ever some of the negative posters do make it interesting. I my self have put up a few negative posts. There is just some thing in me that dislikes the Thai bashers or the ones who can't except the fact that things are different in Thailand.

As for the content of the forum I have noticed a decrease in new items. Some of the OP's are seriously looking for information and they don't even get scanned a lot. Some of them start out good and get turned into nonsense and stay on for ever. In short I really don't find a lot out here about what is hapening in Chiang Mai.

One other point that disturbs me people ask where they can get some thing and half the people who tell them only give a name no directions. While I am on the soap box how come I can have a great meal and tell you all about it including where I had it. But if I have a really bad meal I can not pass on the information where it was if the Moderator see's it he-she yanks it.

some OP's are looking for valuble information

[caf]

If you walked into a strange bar and instead of finding a couple of like-minded people to chat to you stood on a chair and addressed the whole crowd you wouldn't be surprised if some hecklers, drunks, and <deleted> made disparaging remarks, would you? Well, that's what you're doing on a forum. You're not just chatting with your friends you're talking to everyone in the room. Some will agree with you, some will ignore you and some will give you stick. Just like a bar, if the hecklers get out of control, the bar owner will warn them or ban them - on a forum that is the moderators job. Does it make more sense now?

The op's comments, with which I agree, quite clearly comment about the very " hecklers, drunks, and <deleted> (that) make disparaging remarks " which you seem to suggest is par for the course.

His whole point is that that is not what this forum should be about.

I take your point that a barman or mod can control, but why should we have these people on here i the first place.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion without being subjected to the disparaging replies. Being out of control, as you say, is not something to be proud of.

Thaivisa can be a source of useful information and knowledge. It can be a fun forum too, does not always have to be serious. I've seen some very witty comments here but the attacking nature of some posters is not one I admire.

[sarahsbloke]

I take your point that a barman or mod can control, but why should we have these people on here i the first place.

And here we see the second problem with forums, those who aren't mods but want to control who uses the forum.

<deleted> have the same right to an opinion as everyone else ..... you want to control them, learn to use the 'ignore' feature.

I would rather read the comments of a fool, than read the comments of a control freak!