Child Maintenance In Thailand

[randomname13579]

Hi

I am asking for information and guidance on how much I should pay towards the mother of my child - they live in Thailand.

Thankyou.

[Mario2008]

Legally it depends on which law would be applicable. Thai law expects you to pay between 3,000 and 6,000 a month (based on age) and that you share the costs for healthcare and education. Swedish law could demand more.

In a moral sense, you should pay what you can afford and what is needed for your child to grow up in a certain comfort and without financial worries/hardship. It is afterall your child, for whom you are responsible. On the other side it is also the responsibility of the mother and you should take into account what she can afford.

The requirement under Thai law is very minimal.

[beano2274]

Legally it depends on if you are married or not, morally it is up to you how much you pay. No more than 10,000 a month is enough, in fact more than enough, but also depends on where your child is in Thailand, and who really is looking after the child, are her parents looking after the little one whilst she works, or is she at home looking after it.

[randomname13579]

thanks for your comments. Further info - baby is newborn. mum thought she would be clever and not register me as father. I was not present at birth (thats another story). I am in process of legitimization which she is contesting...............!!

Legal fees expensive - happy to pay but want to get this sorted first - ie give child a father.

[MikeyIdea]

thanks for your comments. Further info - baby is newborn. mum thought she would be clever and not register me as father. I was not present at birth (thats another story). I am in process of legitimization which she is contesting...............!!

Legal fees expensive - happy to pay but want to get this sorted first - ie give child a father.

Mother has shown her colours and omitted you as father: If money matters for the mother, then I would advice to pay less than 5,000 bath per month for a newborn and reduce that to 3,500 bath after the first year(unless you get shared custody and access to your child).

Note that you actually don't have to pay anything if you are denied acces to your child (unless your access was revoked by a court decision) and court will not hold that against you in Thailand. The fact that you sue to become legal father with shared custody (= shared duties and responsibilities) and show in court that you are happy to pay after you get access to your child is enough

[mike123ca]

thanks for your comments. Further info - baby is newborn. mum thought she would be clever and not register me as father. I was not present at birth (thats another story). I am in process of legitimization which she is contesting...............!!

Legal fees expensive - happy to pay but want to get this sorted first - ie give child a father.

If your not married to the mother, then it's within her rights to register the father or not.

If you are not married, under Thai law you will not have any obligations

AFAIK.

Best thing would be to find a mediator to help resolve some issues.

Best of Luck/

[transam]

thanks for your comments. Further info - baby is newborn. mum thought she would be clever and not register me as father. I was not present at birth (thats another story). I am in process of legitimization which she is contesting...............!!

Legal fees expensive - happy to pay but want to get this sorted first - ie give child a father.

If your not married to the mother, then it's within her rights to register the father or not.

If you are not married, under Thai law you will not have any obligations

AFAIK.

Best thing would be to find a mediator to help resolve some issues.

Best of Luck/

AND are you the father ? Do you know for sure.

[randomname13579]

Yes absolutely I am the Father - thats not in doubt (she does not doubt it) and have plenty of evidence to prove it including emails and photos that she sends me each month. Money wired at the birth etc etc - you name it I have it!

Mediator - great idea but already tried that with no success.

The Lawyers have already communicated with her to sign a doc stating that she acknowledges me as Father but she has declined - even in the face of huge amounts of evidence to support my case.

i QUOTE "My client does not acknowldge said person to be Father and has no interest in registering at this time" etc.................

I wounder what the judge will say if she allows it to go to court......

I am not paying at the moment - well I paid a substantial amount when she was born and have evidence of the transfer - I am just getting slighly nervous about not paying when much of my money has to go towards uneccesary legal fees

Thanks for all your comments.

[MikeyIdea]

Swede, this is not that unusual. One interesting question is the girls standing. Is she a educated girl with decent family money behind her or will she struggle a bit to get the 25,000 bath that her lawyer will cost? She can easily come to court without a lawyer too if she wants, won't be held against her if she doesn't have money for one (and it won't hurt the outcome much either). Court will help her. Standing will not change the outcome really, it just (probably) tells us how easy or difficult this will be

The evidence you write about is good, that proves that the mother has either ripped you off or she thought you were the father. It is important that you can prove that you were with her 9 months before the birth... Where were you and the mother when the child was conceived? Evidence - photos of her (jpegs have a property for date and time photo was taken - good evidence). And that you keep evidence of the wire transfer for the birth money, all transfer

Your standpoint should be that as a responsible father you of course paid for the birth, here's the evidence

"I wounder what the judge will say if she allows it to go to court...... " - Well it won't be the first time he sees it. It is unlikely that this will go in front of a judge even. It starts with a negotiating session with a court officer and he will examine your good evidence and tell the mother openly what options she has. It may very well stop there with mother accepting legitimization and she gets child alimony. You get shared custody and visitation rights. Don't be afraid of this going in front of the judge, not at all, the judge is not fathers enemy in Thailand

As I said, sue for sole custody and you will eventually get it if she doesn't show up

You will be asked to provide child alimony, your answer should be: Of course, after I get (confirmed) access to my child (incentive for mother to finish quickly). Child alimony is peanuts - 3,100 to max 5,000 bath per month... you should pay more than that but that's bonus for good behaviour of the mother letting you meet your child - it's not what you accept to go into a court agreement

Judges are not partial with Thais against westerners but Thai lawyers sometimes are. They don't want to fight that hard at all, un-patriotic or whatever. Therefore, BEWARE of what your lawyer intend to say and do. Make very very sure that you instruct him exactly what you want and can accept. I demand shared custody, I demand confirmed visitation times or I will refuse to accept a deal, I will refuse to accept a deal if child alimony is more than 4,500 bath per month... Give the lawyer clear instructions. There is nothing like "you are a farang so you have to pay more than Thais do" (in child alimony) - If your lawyer has said that, then replace him or at least instruct him to stop the BS. That is what lawyers say, not what Thai Juvenile court judges expect

Your lawyer probably wants you to accept what is negotiated before it is as good as it can get for you, the mother and her lawyer of course wants the same, the court officer is OK as long as it is good for the child. It is not where it started that matters, if your lawyer refers to where the case started as reason to accept what you get, then bite back. Court cases are always about the end result. This one is going to be about decent confirmed visitation rights for the father more than anything else

I was the interpreter for a westerner in Juvenile court in July, the lawyer there had not been fighting, used the wrong words not making his client look as good as possible, wanted his client to accept easily before acceptable terms were reached. This could partially have been avoided by the client stating clearly what he demand to accept deal forcing the lawyer to fight

"I am just getting slightly nervous about not paying when much of my money has to go towards uneccesary legal fees"

Paying much?

Good Luck

Michael

Edited August 19, 2011 by MikeyIdea

[MikeyIdea]

This didn't sound right

There is nothing like "you are a farang so you have to pay more than Thais do" (in child alimony)

There's nothing like "you are farang so... " in custody either - Thai judges will be fair to the child. Problem is the same regardless of if one parent is westerner or not. Living in different cities and custody and possession of the child is difficult enough, living in different countries is even more difficult

[randomname13579]

Hi M

Thankyou for all this info. We are both Farangs - just wanted to make that clear. Both from different Europe countries.

Thanks for all the info expecially about the "not accepting a deal" so easily.

Cost - peng mak mak! so far 1300 usdollars but I will have to pay some more installments when the file case to the court and either appeal or at another point.

One more thing is that the Lawyers have said that they cannot file the case with the court yest until I have my ex exact address details - I dont know them. However have discovered that she now has a new job? can it be filed at her place of employment?

[Mario2008]

I doubt that is true. All countries have procedures for in the case a party cannnot be found, normally requiring efforts to be made and in the endsoemthing like publishing a court summons in local news papers.

[Spoonman]

Yes absolutely I am the Father - thats not in doubt (she does not doubt it) and have plenty of evidence to prove it including emails and photos that she sends me each month. Money wired at the birth etc etc - you name it I have it!

So no actual DNA testing was done ?

I would want to know 110% that the child was mine before I go handing out money.

[randomname13579]

Like I said - this was planned - believe it or not - the baby i mean! I was the one recording the dates and times - so yes I know even 110% !!

Mario - what the Lawyers have said is they wanted to put a detective on the case and charge me 50,000 bht. - I said NO as she is just paying rent in bungalows - as we all know limited contract paperwork and documents.

[Mario2008]

Maybe time to switch lawyers, or at least have a talk to another one and get his opnion.

[gregb]

MikeyIdea posted on a different thread that if you filed a lawsuit and didn't have an address the Thai courts could send a letter to the mother's registered address. Then, if she failed to show it was her problem, although the court case itself would take much longer.

Since you are saying the mother is a foreigner, presumably she must have an address on file at immigration. I would guess that means her passport number would enough for them to find her registered address. I will defer to MikeyIdea on this as I was unaware that this was even possible until he mentioned it a few weeks ago. But definitely something to research.

Send MikeyIdea a PM if he doesn't see this thread and answer himself.

[MikeyIdea]

MikeyIdea posted on a different thread that if you filed a lawsuit and didn't have an address the Thai courts could send a letter to the mother's registered address. Then, if she failed to show it was her problem, although the court case itself would take much longer.

Since you are saying the mother is a foreigner, presumably she must have an address on file at immigration. I would guess that means her passport number would enough for them to find her registered address. I will defer to MikeyIdea on this as I was unaware that this was even possible until he mentioned it a few weeks ago. But definitely something to research.

Send MikeyIdea a PM if he doesn't see this thread and answer himself.

One lawyer has told me that he knows of cases where father filed without knowing the location of the mother. I didn't ask but I suppose this was accompanied by a missing persons police report - Again missing persons report important Swede, get one done immediately. I don't know if this will be accepted if case is between foreigners

I remember now, French monther. OK, your case is more complicated as both are foreigners, the risk here is that juvenile court will refuse to take it up. Maybe it is to push it. The main point is to get this into court. Do you have one valid address? And copy of mothers passport and birth certificate of child of course. OK, you've got an address. Who says that it has to be home address of the foreigner? Include 2 addresses, work address and last home address / bungalow but don't tell which is which and suggest court send summons to both

Court will not want to remove custody from a mother. If the mother doesn't show up and court refuses to act, then suggest legitimization and shared custody. That can't hurt the child, court is unlikely to refuse

I like the immigration approach - get the registered address from TM and that will be good

[MikeyIdea]

I think I ate a few words...

"Maybe it is to push it" - Should read. Maybe it is best not to push it. You want this to be taken up by the court, don't want to risk it being thrown out because of missing information

A lawyer friend told me that he has to go to amphur and get registered address of wife to be able to file - address must normally be included - yes. As I said, another lawyer has also told me that he's heard of cases where it has been done without it. Your lawyers big question will be: But where to file?

"Court will not want to remove custody from a mother. If the mother doesn't show up and court refuses to act, then suggest legitimization and shared custody. That can't hurt the child, court is unlikely to refuse"

Nearly everybody file for sole custody in Thailand but then court case will often end up with shared custody and organised possession of the child. I would like to word it so that either sole custody or shared custody can be ordered. Depends on how the court will act if mother does not show up. If they don't want to order sole custody to father, then they could throw it out if they have no other option. It is good for the child to have a father so legitimization and shared custody is a good option for the court

Don't complicate things, only file for legitimization and custody

I don't know how TM (immigration) will react if you go there with the birth certificate and a missing persons report of your child and a copy of the mothers passport and ask them to tell you where the foreign mother of your child is registered as living. A western friend of mine has been to TM (immigration) at Suvarnabhumi airport more than once to ask if his Thai wife is still in the country and they have always told him – but he showed them arrest warrant (of another person) for kidnapping of his Thai daughter, a bit different from missing persons report of his daughter but I would still try. Be very polite of course, be the desperate and humble father looking for your child. They will probably help if they can.

There was one ThaiVisa member who posted that he was allowed to extend the passport of his Thai child by 1) showing missing persons report of the mother (the mother had been missing a few years if I remember right) and 2) he had co-signed for the passport when it was originally issued. The Thai approach can be humane rather than based on principles

Missing persons report – do you have one yet?

[randomname13579]

No missing person report yet. How do i make a missing person report?