A Tale Of 3 Thai Chicks

[Beetlejuice]

If you're a 60 year old guy and seeking a much younger wife, whatever nationality, then it`s all about money.

Those who believe that these girls find you attractive or want to be with you because of your charm or charisma, are living in cloud cuckoo land.

Don`t kid yourselves, because your Thai wife will become your tied wife and will remain as long as the money is there.

Consider the situation in reverse. How many guys in they're 20s up to 40s actually fancy women 20 or 30 years older than themselves?

And if you do succeed in finding a young lady then she will be from an underclass background and probably desperate, because no decent attractive, educated, middle class well established Thai lady would ever want to get herself hooked up with some undesirable aging farang.

Edited October 11, 2011 by Beetlejuice

[IanForbes]

Interesting bunch of replies. It tells me more about the poster than the person they are posting about. I'm pretty open with my life style and wouldn't change it for love or money. I can have enough of both if I want it. And, EVERYTHING comes at a price... even wealth. It just depends on what you consider good value. I've been married and divorced twice and I wouldn't change those experences for anything. I have two children and 3 grandkids, but I would not marry again for any amount of money. My freedom is worth more to me than anything.

What the OP decides to do is entirely up to him and I hope he chooses wisely. I've seen some that worked well and many more that didn't. Undoing a relationship is a REAL pain. And, I've seen just as many marriages to Thai prostitutes work as well as marriages to the so called "high society" ladies.

[outofoz]

I agree with 3, my gf says only hookers and ex-hookers do that.

I agree with your choice of ages too, early to mid 30s is good for reproduction.

I would add

Don't chase fertile women if you have had a vasectomy or don't want children.

Don't chase women that can already speak English.

I don't agree with the 'don't chase women that can already speak English'

There are scores of perfectly nice and decent Thai women who can speak English well and are not, and have not been hookers or anything of the like.

For most Hotels catering to foreigners, English is required to work the front desk. Likewise many University graduates and business people have learnt English to help them along their way.

My GF, who speaks English reasonably well has many friends in hospitality who speak English better than her, have never dated a farang, and are not interested in dating farangs. They are lovely people for the most part.

Undoubtedly some women learn English to bag themselves a foreign husband and a better way of life but it is hardly an 'avoid situation'.

Just avoid meeting girls in bars if you want love and a relationship.

[outofoz]

johnnyj, there is a lot of merit in laying cards on the table, i.e., if I'm not prepared to support family, then it's best known early, just as if she doesn't do oral, it's best established early. Sorry sbk, but had to use the example.

When these things are established early, there can be a lot of time and anguish saved at the other end.

I'm seeing conflicting opinion on best ages relative to the man's, whether beating is acceptable or not, and others. incidentally, beating a woman (or a man for that matter) is not acceptable to me, drunk or otherwise..

I've noted over the years that women from different Asian countries are desperate to find a foreign man, but reasons differ. SE Asian countries, it's often because they want better (financial) circumstances. I found when I was living in japan that many Japanese women wanted a foreign man, but because they are treated so badly by Japanese men.

Keep it coming. I'm enjoying the reading.

I agree it is best to be up front with what u want/expect/will do/wont do..... of course, it can all subtly change over time wihtout you even realising.

Most women just want some security.. so if you are happy to provide that...

[richard_smith237]

I find it astonishing that anyone would want to have a Thai girlfriend/wife but refuse to accept their culture and use this as a condition of the relationship. Totally selfish and I'm not surprised at the OP's lack of success.

Those girls are not what you'd call traditional thai girls. They are most likely working girls who are solely out to meet foreigners so they can get provided for. Nothing to do with accepting their culture because that isnt part of their culture.

Rubbish. The need to take care of your parents/family is part of Thai culture.

The need to take care of ones family is part of any culture. In this case culture is being used in an attempt to exploit someone.

These girls are not interested in meeting the love of their life. They are selling themselves into what they hope is more financially fruitful life. They've all heard how a friends friend has married a rich 'falang' and they too want a piece of that pie.... They head directly for the stereotype and the stereotype unfortunately heads directly for them.... both sides have done nothing other than pull the wool over their own eyes, the girls will not love the men, the men will eventually resent feeding the hunger for financial security the girls demand.... There is no mutual respect, only a few accidental successes survive time....

[ozzieovaseas]

I notice a bit of a theme in this thread...regarding the OP's comments..

OP has to apologize repeatedly to SBK about the sex referances, but yet they keep on comin!!...pun not intended

But it do get the hint that sexual matters might be high up on the list of the OPs priorities.

Just dont make the same mistake that a lot of other guys do here..(this including me )

Always wanting to date the naughty girl...but go crying to their mamma when said girl turns out being very VERY naughty

[farang000999]

so was surprised to be inundated with offers from women as young as 19 through to 60's. I don't pretend for a second that I would be attractive to a 19 yo here, so why would I be there, other than for money?? I am a realist. My target group was 35-50 (and even 35-40 is a touch on the low side), had to be attractive, slim, sexy, and speak at least some English.

it's bad logic to think that because a woman is older that she is less on the game. honestly, the opposite might be true. the older ones might be more desperate and "hungry"...

and i have never used a thai dating site but can't imagine much good coming from it. i would advise to look for women who are NOT looking for farang. They are EVERYWHERE.

[poanoi]

If you're a 60 year old guy and seeking a much younger wife, whatever nationality, then it`s all about money.

Those who believe that these girls find you attractive or want to be with you because of your charm or charisma, are living in cloud cuckoo land.

Don`t kid yourselves, because your Thai wife will become your tied wife and will remain as long as the money is there.

Consider the situation in reverse. How many guys in they're 20s up to 40s actually fancy women 20 or 30 years older than themselves?

And if you do succeed in finding a young lady then she will be from an underclass background and probably desperate, because no decent attractive, educated, middle class well established Thai lady would ever want to get herself hooked up with some undesirable aging farang.

OMG

The truth was spoken

[ludditeman]

Rubbish. The need to take care of your parents/family is part of Thai culture.

So what's the deal if you can't do so, insufficient income, etc. If you can't, you can't, but what happens? Are you ostracized from the clan, punished, just regarded as a loser, what?

I don't think there are many of us who couldn't afford 2000bht a month to care for a girls parents, they don't get pensions you know.

If you are that short of cash you should be back home claiming welfare.

[saxpirant]

I don't think there are many of us who couldn't afford 2000bht a month to care for a girls parents, they don't get pensions you know.

If you are that short of cash you should be back home claiming welfare.

I'm not short of cash ludditeman, even after a divorce. My income would make most people's eyes water, but I worked long and hard for it, and I don't feel the need to buy somebody by supporting their parents. what would the parents do if the girl didn't have a farang man with a good income. Exactly! well they could do it with a farang man as a son in law. That's putting the cart before the horse though. I was on a recce trip and sharing my experiences, seeking input, and I'm getting that..

[saxpirant]

The need to take care of ones family is part of any culture. In this case culture is being used in an attempt to exploit someone.

These girls are not interested in meeting the love of their life. They are selling themselves into what they hope is more financially fruitful life. They've all heard how a friends friend has married a rich 'falang' and they too want a piece of that pie.... They head directly for the stereotype and the stereotype unfortunately heads directly for them.... both sides have done nothing other than pull the wool over their own eyes, the girls will not love the men, the men will eventually resent feeding the hunger for financial security the girls demand.... There is no mutual respect, only a few accidental successes survive time....

There's a LOT of truth in what you say richard_smith237

[ludditeman]

I don't think there are many of us who couldn't afford 2000bht a month to care for a girls parents, they don't get pensions you know.

If you are that short of cash you should be back home claiming welfare.

I'm not short of cash ludditeman, even after a divorce. My income would make most people's eyes water, but I worked long and hard for it, and I don't feel the need to buy somebody by supporting their parents. what would the parents do if the girl didn't have a farang man with a good income. Exactly! well they could do it with a farang man as a son in law. That's putting the cart before the horse though. I was on a recce trip and sharing my experiences, seeking input, and I'm getting that..

I know a nice country girl who works as a fruit picker (works dawn until dusk), no husband, no boyfriend, earns 200bht a day works 30 days a month.

Her total income is 6,000bht a month, of which she gives 1000 bht to her 70yo mother.

Neither of them have very much, but that's the way it is out here.

She would love to be a housewife, but still needs to provide for her mother, no matter what the nationality of the man.

Edited October 11, 2011 by ludditeman

[harryfrompattaya]

I find it astonishing that anyone would want to have a Thai girlfriend/wife but refuse to accept their culture and use this as a condition of the relationship. Totally selfish and I'm not surprised at the OP's lack of success.

Culture? lol.. How many Thai guys would put up with that sh1t?

Adopt the Thai Culture you are right

Many if all Thai men give wife's family but how many give more than 1000 Baht month to their wife and wife's family?. I bet not more than 2 per cent.

So be like a big sport and give 1500 a month combine to both.

Edited October 11, 2011 by harryfrompattaya

[saxpirant]

There was a woman from CM on TLL, very attractive, with whom I corresponded for a while. She said she needed B20,000 a month allowance. I asked how much she earned, and it was B8,000!!?? She'd be no more than a hooker but living under the same roof

Edited October 11, 2011 by saxpirant

[Eff1n2ret]

For anybody deliberately to set out in search of marriage having just divorced seems to be a triumph of hope over experience.

Thai immigration rules do not stipulate an intention to get married as a condition of entry to the country.

The OP could just come here, if he likes the place, and take it as it comes

[saxpirant]

For anybody deliberately to set out in search of marriage having just divorced seems to be a triumph of hope over experience.

Thai immigration rules do not stipulate an intention to get married as a condition of entry to the country.

The OP could just come here, if he likes the place, and take it as it comes

I didn't say that I was looking for marriage!! It was a reconnaissance trip to check out possible locations to live and also Thai women, their attitudes and expectations.

Edited October 11, 2011 by saxpirant

[McGarty]

As an aside, I found it astounding that each was prepared to have sex without condoms. Not for me, and a jacket went on in each case.

No condom is the norm.

Don't say 'they had jobs' until you have turned up UNEXPECTEDLY at their work place and seen them working. Working girls who pretend not to be working girls are tricky.

The one in CM might have been legit, the other two weren't.

Most real jobs are long hours six days a week, unlikely that they could get time off to hang with you for a week. So how come they had all that free time?

This post I agree with.

Most Thai women have or have had very little to do with English speaking people. The English taught at school is very basic. That begs the question, Where did they learn such good English? Generally from being around us who speak the language. With such a small % of English speaking people in this country the women usually only learn from one source. Working. And I do not mean working in some local shop or supermarket either.

The great majority who do work often work 12 hours a day. Some get 1 day off a week. Others 1 day off a fortnight. These women took time off in the hope of impressing you.

Going to restaurants? Not many average Thai people can afford to go to a restaurant even on a weekly basis.

Easy sex and with no condom? Ahhh, so easy for them to open their Honey Traps and entice you in.

Their facial expressions and reactions regarding money, clothes and support for family told you a lot, or should have.

I started off by dating Thai women on the internet and progressed to meeting them in real life. In real life I almost always needed a Thai friend with reasonable English to communicate with the other women I have dated because their English was too limited.

In every case there has been need for some level of support to these women because all have children and if you want them at home with you every day they have no other way of supporting the children. The level of support they want depends on what they think they can get away with. In my case I have always been happy with low level support. I do not believe in this 10K, 20K, 30K a month bullshit that some people hand out

.

Consider it from another perspective. 10K a month @ sex 5 times a week = 500 Baht a shag. Plus you pay for the food. They live rent free. They get taken out to restaurants, to pubs too. You usually buy the clothes as well in many cases. That 10K has now gone up dramatically, as has the cost of your 5 times a week sex. Some plus points are that you know where she is most of the time. You have companionship. Help with the need to talk Thai.

And sex where you do not need a condom and you do not have to worry about oral

But be realistic about why they want you. That is enough from me and my soapbox

[Mario2008]

1 post commenting on moderation deleted.

[Gary A]

I came to Thailand originally to take advantage of a job opportunity. I had lost my job in the US after twenty two years because the company sold the factory.

I then left Thailand when the economy here crashed and really had no idea how much the country and people had gotten in my blood until I took a job in Southern California. I absolutely hated it there.

During that last five years of my working life I decided that I would retire here in Thailand. One of the Thai engineers I worked with told me that the proper age for a wife is half your age plus seven years. He told me that the Thai people accept that.

I don't want to rain on your parade but it took me ten years to find the right woman. She was half my age plus seven years so that part worked well for me. My wife is a farm girl and came from a relatively poor family. I know she helps out her mother and father by giving each of them 500 baht a month. My wife still works on the farms although she doesn't have to. In fact I try to tell her she should quit, but she says it is her duty. Her family was lucky and had no boys, just five girls and they are all good girls so they all pitch in.

I think you have to be patient and not rush into anything until you are sure you have found the right one. That often takes time.

[garrfeild]

I met my wife 3 years ago. I have helped her family, but they are paying back the loan. She doesn't need or ask for money for things. Not stopping at the shops looking at me with eyes that say I want that.

I have a lady friend in CM, she is Just a friend we have not had sex nor it it expected on my part. But when I visit CM She comes with me to sometimes visit local attractions or go out for a meal together. She fits the OP story to a degree. Having gone out with her for an afternoon to the airport plaza she went straight to one of the cosmetics counters in the dept store there and wanted a eye-liner pencil. I got those eyes, that say buy for me!

My last visit to CM I met up with her, we were! guess where? Yes the Plaza again, This time it was a pair of Levy's.

It has made me Think. Yet if I wanted to buy my wife a pair of Levy's she would look at me like I'm crazy. There is about 4 years difference in their ages my wife being younger. There is 14 years difference between my wife and my age.

[rgs2001uk]

Rubbish. The need to take care of your parents/family is part of Thai culture.

So what's the deal if you can't do so, insufficient income, etc. If you can't, you can't, but what happens? Are you ostracized from the clan, punished, just regarded as a loser, what?

I don't think there are many of us who couldn't afford 2000bht a month to care for a girls parents, they don't get pensions you know.

If you are that short of cash you should be back home claiming welfare.

Is the girl an invalid or does she suffer from some sort of incapacity, whats to stop the girl working and taking care of her own parents?

They do get pensions you know.

2,000 or 20,000 is totally irrelevant, its called personal responsibility, are these people incapable of caring for themselves, what about other family members, how much do they contribute?

Fed up hearing this BS that is fed to gullible farang.

Have stated on here before, but will say again before you ask, I paid no sin sot for my wife, I do not give her a monthly allowance.

My wife also does not give her mother money on a monthly basis.

[Khun ?]

For anybody deliberately to set out in search of marriage having just divorced seems to be a triumph of hope over experience.

Thai immigration rules do not stipulate an intention to get married as a condition of entry to the country.

The OP could just come here, if he likes the place, and take it as it comes

I didn't say that I was looking for marriage!! It was a reconnaissance trip to check out possible locations to live and also Thai women, their attitudes and expectations.

As with all investments they should be chosen cautiously, they can be costly!

[falkan]

I have met a few ladies from TLL, they were all after money and after a few bottles of wine a couple of them told me they already got farang bf sending them money but they want more haha..

[thaibeachlovers]

johnnyj, there is a lot of merit in laying cards on the table, i.e., if I'm not prepared to support family, then it's best known early, just as if she doesn't do oral, it's best established early. Sorry sbk, but had to use the example.

When these things are established early, there can be a lot of time and anguish saved at the other end.

I'm seeing conflicting opinion on best ages relative to the man's, whether beating is acceptable or not, and others. incidentally, beating a woman (or a man for that matter) is not acceptable to me, drunk or otherwise..

I've noted over the years that women from different Asian countries are desperate to find a foreign man, but reasons differ. SE Asian countries, it's often because they want better (financial) circumstances. I found when I was living in japan that many Japanese women wanted a foreign man, but because they are treated so badly by Japanese men.

Keep it coming. I'm enjoying the reading.

I'm with you on the "not supporting the family", but it will cause problems- can you deal with bitter relatives that try to poison your relationship?

Yes, seems like physical abuse, usually when drunk, is pretty standard, from what I've seen, but I 'm not into hiso women, so don't know about that strata of Thai society.

I reckon that it's good that my wife is in her 30s, because I'll always find her physically attractive till I die. Does bring certain moral problems though, as in is it fair that I'll die whle she is still relatively young, but we discussed that aspect at length before getting engaged.

I certainly agree that it's essential to lay everything out, so as not to have surprises later on.

My wife doesn't expect me to "support" her own spending, though as she can only earn under 10,000 a month I pay the rent, electric etc and food for the both of us.

As far as her working, that is essential, as I do need my own time during the day, and when she isn't working she doesn't want to do her "own thing". Being possesive certainly seems the norm.

There are women that aren't just in it for the money, but it takes time, a lot of time and luck to find one.

[Thongkorn]

Its amazing how many men come to Thailand and got to s..t hole called , p..ya and. form a general opinion of all Thai girls and Lady's, maybe if Thai people went down the local red light districk in other western countrys and then formed an opinion that all Western woman are all the same

[sbk]

Its obvious where this thread belongs, but I will be kind and simply move it to pub, lets drop the shaving BS please this forum is supposed to be fairly family friendly.

[IanForbes]

Its obvious where this thread belongs, but I will be kind and simply move it to pub, lets drop the shaving BS please this forum is supposed to be fairly family friendly.

Wise decision. That is where it belonged in the first place... or perhaps even Bedlam.

[wellred]

I really don't get this love = money thing. Usually when I hear of somethng like this I think that they just don't respect the farang and only want to see how much money they can extract.

Anyway im headed there in 2 months time for a month and then am looking to re locate from work (UK) to Bangkok. I've been talking to this 1 girl for a few months and it's fair to say we are pretty into each other. I'm 29 and she is 22. She works for some production company doing quality assurance and she's booked some time off work for when I come with a view to accompanying me to Krabi and possibly Koh Phangan.

I've got no problem paying for her flights which will probably come out at 4-5000 bhat for each trip. Obviously ill be paying for the hotel as well as food drink and daily spending money but the came at me with a weird question this week. She essentially asked me to pay her the equivilent of her monthly salary for the time she is with mr, as compensation for her taking time off work. Now I tried to ask her if she had the concept of paid leave where she worked but I couldn't understand whether she was playing dumb or just emarassed at my answer. Needless to say I declined saying I was upset that she was even asking me.

Her and her sister gossip on each others facebook wall every day and when im feeling nosey ill run a few 'extracts' through an online translator and it turns out the mother was asking her to ask me, but her sis said it was a dead tradition and not to bother or risk 'losing me'. On the mum she sends home 15,000 out of her monthly 25,000 wage. I said to her look waan jai if you want more money to pay loom lent then don't send so much to your mum. As far as I know her mum sits on her arse in Ubon raking in a monthly racket wage from her 3 daughters.

I like the girl and am still looking forward to seeing her but I do have a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth. I actually really like her (course I do, why wouldn't I) but im thinking to maybe keep my options open. I'm not really a big P4P guy tbh. I might hit a club to check out some freelancers but I don't think ill be spending my evenings in Nana, except for maybe 1 evening to see what all the fuss is about.

Edited October 11, 2011 by wellred

[MEGALITHIC]

I really don't get this love = money thing. Usually when I hear of somethng like this I think that they just don't respect the farang and only want to see how much money they can extract.

Anyway im headed there in 2 months time for a month and then am looking to re locate from work (UK) to Bangkok. I've been talking to this 1 girl for a few months and it's fair to say we are pretty into each other. I'm 29 and she is 22. She works for some production company doing quality assurance and she's booked some time off work for when I come with a view to accompanying me to Krabi and possibly Koh Phangan.

I've got no problem paying for her flights which will probably come out at 4-5000 bhat for each trip. Obviously ill be paying for the hotel as well as food drink and daily spending money but the came at me with a weird question this week. She essentially asked me to pay her the equivilent of her monthly salary for the time she is with mr, as compensation for her taking time off work. Now I tried to ask her if she had the concept of paid leave where she worked but I couldn't understand whether she was playing dumb or just emarassed at my answer. Needless to say I declined saying I was upset that she was even asking me.

Her and her sister gossip on each others facebook wall every day and when im feeling nosey ill run a few 'extracts' through an online translator and it turns out the mother was asking her to ask me, but her sis said it was a dead tradition and not to bother or risk 'losing me'. On the mum she sends home 15,000 out of her monthly 25,000 wage. I said to her look waan jai if you want more money to pay loom lent then don't send so much to your mum. As far as I know her mum sits on her arse in Ubon raking in a monthly racket wage from her 3 daughters.

I like the girl and am still looking forward to seeing her but I do have a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth. I actually really like her (course I do, why wouldn't I) but im thinking to maybe keep my options open. I'm not really a big P4P guy tbh. I might hit a club to check out some freelancers but I don't think ill be spending my evenings in Nana, except for maybe 1 evening to see what all the fuss is about.

Some of the other experienced asia hands will have their views the above scenario; this is mine:

1. The mother is a greedy pig that sees you as a potential cash cow to be milked. Why? Because you've got a good job and you are possibly coming out to BKK with the same company meaning you'll probably be on a nice expat package. In future, never tell Thai women that you're relocating to BKK on an expat package. This is the reason why the comment was made about 'losing you forever.'

2. Playing dumb about your question regarding paid leave. There's a good possibility that she might be getting it anyway but the mother tried coercing her into milking you for more. It might be legitimate and that she isn't getting any paid time off but, even so, there's clearly no concept of gratitude there for the fact that you're going to give her an all expenses, one month trip around Thailand.

3. During your holiday she will keep chipping away and testing your resolve about giving her cash handouts because the mother will be in her ear, on a regular basis, about it. Eventually you'll get so fed up with it that you'll find some excuse to end the holiday early, or send her packing.

4. Make no mistake about it, you're being lined up for marriage. Otherwise, why the comment 'lose him forever'? Do yourself a big favour, give it a big miss. You're 29 and you've got the world at your feet - especially when you move out here - and what you don't need is some greedy little scheming gold digger, and her mother, from that certain part of Thailand (where most of them come from) giving you a nightmare of a holiday. Go to the clubs and pick up freelancers or even BKK party girls. Travel around the country on your own, have your way with the local lasses, but don't get attached.

[473geo]

Quite an interesting thread........Thai ladies and money?

Have another breeze through the thread and see how many posts here mention money......

You may incude this one if you wish..

But who is more concerned about money, those that don't have any.......or those that can't bear to spend it on any other than themselves?