Farang Liars And Wierdos

[sandgroper2]

Take a visit to Jomtien Beach Condomiiniu, we got the pick of the bunch when it comes to idiots. Nearly every day there is a new notice on the community notice board requesting someone to come back home as their village is missing .

Folks stealing villages now eh? They're a bad bunch those Jomtiem farangs.

"village idiot",

[lovelaos]

I was sat in a hotel bar the other night minding my own business when some wierdo started a conversation about how he took this hot Chinese girl on a date, he knew she was Chinese because she had a Chinese name and a Chinese father. Apparantly she liked sandwiches.

He kept going on about teachers and not getting his ticket stamped When I asked him if he got his leg over he quickly paid his bill and ran away.

[richardjm65]

Years ago I used to meet Belgian Jack sometimes in the bars.

He was a bit weird with his portable radio cassette player with Austrian SS music

Yes, I remember this Belgian guy too - you're going back a long time, 'cos I've been living up-country for the last 14 years. He was very loud, totally pro-nazi. His voice was like chains being dragged over a tin roof and if he found out you were a Brit, or one of "the other side", he was quite likely to have a rant at you. Used to run into him around the bars in Cowboy and Nana - maybe he did Patpong too, but I quit going there many years ago.

I never heard of him getting violent and he was accepted as a bit of an eccentric, (but generally harmless), idiot. I knew guys who'd buy him a drink just to hear him rave. Anyone know what happened to him or where he is now? Maybe back with the stormtroopers.....

[meom]

Last time I met him must've been 1999 or something like that.

Apparently his wife was Filipina so my guess is he went back to Filipines.

[Bagwan]

All the world is queer save thee and me, and even thou art a little queer'. (Robert Owen 1771-1858)

[maiphedmaiaroi]

I was sat in a hotel bar the other night minding my own business when some wierdo started a conversation about how he took this hot Chinese girl on a date, he knew she was Chinese because she had a Chinese name and a Chinese father. Apparantly she liked sandwiches.

He kept going on about teachers and not getting his ticket stamped When I asked him if he got his leg over he quickly paid his bill and ran away.

Seems this thread has turned into "its impossible to meet a Chinese/Thai or Thai/Chinese" girl or whatever you wanna call them.

Its sooooooo easy to get decent girls if you know where to look .

I feel sorry for most of you as most seem to think its impossible Infact hilarious

Well after all TITV

[maiphedmaiaroi]

Has anyone ever seen the guy with the crazy eyes that rides around pattaya dressed in pink and his bike has hundreds of tassles attached to it.

I'd love to hear some of his stories. Very perculiar guy. All i can think of is he was doing it for a bet.

[doji]

Yea I once saw this weird looking farang constantly giggling at the corner of a coffeeshop with his thai young lovebird while I was trying to enjoy my favorite ladnaa. He looked like one of those atomic scientists who just got released from the Iranian prison after had been kidnapped and held for40 yrs in captivity by the Ayatollah Khamenei.

Geez at least some of these old geezers would have thought better to groom themselves up first before a date!....like a smart dress, pressed shirt, a bit of face moisturizer ,a few tweezies here & there around the eyebrows / mustasche etcs….

Actually it's not an uncommon sight with many farangs in Thailand really. Why do many farangs in Thailand are so down right dirty or unkept looking?

[richardjm65]

Years ago I used to meet Belgian Jack sometimes in the bars.

He was a bit weird with his portable radio cassette player with Austrian SS music

Yes, I remember this Belgian guy too - you're going back a long time, 'cos I've been living up-country for the last 14 years. He was very loud, totally pro-nazi. His voice was like chains being dragged over a tin roof and if he found out you were a Brit, or one of "the other side", he was quite likely to have a rant at you. Used to run into him around the bars in Cowboy and Nana - maybe he did Patpong too, but I quit going there many years ago.

I never heard of him getting violent and he was accepted as a bit of an eccentric, (but generally harmless), idiot. I knew guys who'd buy him a drink just to hear him rave. Anyone know what happened to him or where he is now? Maybe back with the stormtroopers.....

This has tapped into some memories. Back in '89-'90 I used to go to NEP on a Saturday afternoon for lunch and a beer or two, (my office was around the area), and there was a real Walter Mitty character who was usually pissed by 3.00pm and would tell the assembled of his secret training of hill tribe rebels in the mountains on the Thai-Burma border. "I see a fair bit of action too" he'd tell us with that serious, faraway look the real vets get in their eyes when they are reminiscing on past glories. We'd express wonder and admiration and egg him on to greater revelations of valour and derring-do. The following week, quite forgetting the faces he'd talked to the previous week, he'd be a pilot with (I think) KLM - and he held the record for the fastest passage between Schipol and Don Muang (as it then was).

He put on a great show one afternoon when, after telling us one tale or another, and totally rat-arsed, he made for the escalator and got on putting all his upper body weight on his left arm with his hand gripping the hand rail. Unfortunately, although the escalator was moving as it should, the hand rail was not, and in his pissed state he failed to notice his feet passing his point of balance until it was too late and of course, there was no possibility of recovery. He therefore had no choice but to let go, fall on his back, and proceed to the top feet first, on his back, much to the amusement of the assembled and the applause of some early girls on the first floor who shrieked and cackled unkindly and rudely. I expect he'd be retired by now.....

NEP was then quite different from what it is now, though doubtless there are still a good few characters.

[lovelaos]

<br />

<br />I was sat in a hotel bar the other night minding my own business when some wierdo started a conversation about how he took this hot Chinese girl on a date, he knew she was Chinese because she had a Chinese name and a Chinese father. Apparantly she liked sandwiches.<br />He kept going on about teachers and not getting his ticket stamped <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/crazy.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> When I asked him if he got his leg over he quickly paid his bill and ran away.<br />

<br /><br />Seems this thread has turned into "its impossible to meet a Chinese/Thai or Thai/Chinese" girl or whatever you wanna call them.<br /><br />Its sooooooo easy to get decent girls if you know where to look <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/wink.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />. <br /><br />I feel sorry for most of you as most seem to think its impossible <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> Infact hilarious <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /><br /><br />Well after all TITV  <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /><br />

<br /><br /><br />

Thai/Chinese Chinese/Thai Thainese/Chai Chai/Thainese whatever you wanna call them. I prefer Thainese. Are all Thainese girls "decent" then?

[maiphedmaiaroi]

<br />

<br />I was sat in a hotel bar the other night minding my own business when some wierdo started a conversation about how he took this hot Chinese girl on a date, he knew she was Chinese because she had a Chinese name and a Chinese father. Apparantly she liked sandwiches.<br />He kept going on about teachers and not getting his ticket stamped <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/crazy.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> When I asked him if he got his leg over he quickly paid his bill and ran away.<br />

<br /><br />Seems this thread has turned into "its impossible to meet a Chinese/Thai or Thai/Chinese" girl or whatever you wanna call them.<br /><br />Its sooooooo easy to get decent girls if you know where to look <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/wink.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />. <br /><br />I feel sorry for most of you as most seem to think its impossible <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> Infact hilarious <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /><br /><br />Well after all TITV <img src='http://static.thaivisa.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /><br />

<br /><br /><br />

Thai/Chinese Chinese/Thai Thainese/Chai Chai/Thainese whatever you wanna call them. I prefer Thainese. Are all Thainese girls "decent" then?

Wouldnt have a clue mate. Go find out for yourself. That one is highly recommended though. Thought id died and gone to heaven

............Once met a guy in a bar that had been in thailand since he 18, he is now 36. He worked until recently in IT for 17 years and now flys Boeing 747s. He cant even speak properly due to being a alcholic. Anyway i believe him 100%

Oh and the 5ft 1 security guy that took care of chelsea football team when they were in bangkok that had a south african accent yet swore it was a scottish one. He was another interesting chap to talk too.

Edited December 13, 2011 by maiphedmaiaroi

[mca]

Just an observation. If you're the kinda guy who's lived a fairly boring life, and coming to Thailand, doing the scene, is considered adventurous and a bit out of the norm, then a lot may sound like lies to you. Sometimes the perspective is the problem.

I met a bloke in Khon Kaen once who claimed to have paperwork that showed he actually owned Australia and New Zealand and had taken the Queen to court ( with George Bush as a witness for some reason) to stake his claim.

I guess I'll have to readjust my pespectice as I foolishly wrote him off as a mad &lt;deleted&gt;.

[TexasRanger]

They are everywhere, like the wasted Scottish guy I met recently in Africa who was the CEO of Chevron. Or the guy here who has always got a story about helping the cops with this, or the embassy with that, Mr Helper has been here longer than me and he can't even speak Thai.

[SAW]

Plenty of Micky Peirce's in Thailand...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fF_MhGYmwCo

[norrona]

what about the fella who has profiles on every Thai Visa poster and cross references every post anyone makes with what they have posted previously

[poanoi]

That helps keeping lies from carrying away too far

[johnnyj]

Once met a guy who had served in the English SAS in WWII, then went on to serve with NZ and Aussie and canada, scary thing was he was old enough and to this day it wouldn't surprise me if it was 100% true

Was a fascinating old chap to drink a few beers with that's for sure

Edited December 13, 2011 by johnnyj

[CheGuava]

what about the fella who has profiles on every Thai Visa poster and cross references every post anyone makes with what they have posted previously

That would keep him off the streets though. Please don't say anything that would make him stop doing that.

[StreetCowboy]

I met a weird wanke_r in 1993 who took me for a beer and threatened to kill himself before the end of the night. He is now my best mate.

And, did he kill himself that night?

I mean, I don't know you and don't know how weird you are...

I didn't say he was currently a corpse did I?

I hate it too, whenever I miss out critical details from a story and they just fall flat. Luckily someone took the time to ask and get the full details.

As we can say of your friend, better late than never...

SC

[StreetCowboy]

Imagine you had went for hot pot with your Chinese girlfriend , instead of a sandwich, and whilst she was flicking rice into her mouth with her chopsticks ,and talking with her mouth full you accidently bumped the broth cauldron spilling the boiling mixture all over your legs . Imagine she then ran away from the situation , not knowing you own a car , because she could not take the indignity of getting on the tube with you and left you with the bill . So in great pain you managed to get to a 7/11 where you treated your badly burned legs as best you know how , with ice and cling film, giving yourself time to get the burns treated by a doctor and if that wasn't bad enough no one stopped to ask if you were ok or in need of help .

Hehe very funny post. Nice one.

Welcome to the twilight zone .

Lucky you had your socks, or you'd have had to go thirsty.

I was trying to find that post to quote in another thread where someone was suggesting real men drink from funnels, not glasses

SC

[onionluke]

Imagine you had went for hot pot with your Chinese girlfriend , instead of a sandwich, and whilst she was flicking rice into her mouth with her chopsticks ,and talking with her mouth full you accidently bumped the broth cauldron spilling the boiling mixture all over your legs . Imagine she then ran away from the situation , not knowing you own a car , because she could not take the indignity of getting on the tube with you and left you with the bill . So in great pain you managed to get to a 7/11 where you treated your badly burned legs as best you know how , with ice and cling film, giving yourself time to get the burns treated by a doctor and if that wasn't bad enough no one stopped to ask if you were ok or in need of help .

Hehe very funny post. Nice one.

Welcome to the twilight zone .

Lucky you had your socks, or you'd have had to go thirsty.

I was trying to find that post to quote in another thread where someone was suggesting real men drink from funnels, not glasses

SC

"Alternatively , I grab the bottle and in frutration smash the top of the kneck off . Then I filter the water of life through an old sock , preferably with no holes , into a bucket to much aplause from my fiff raff chums. The good auld days .

xcusemeisthertoopeezinaplause? "

I had to tool about to find it .

[StreetCowboy]

...

Imagine you had went for hot pot with your Chinese girlfriend , instead of a sandwich, and whilst she was flicking rice into her mouth with her chopsticks ,and talking with her mouth full you accidently bumped the broth cauldron spilling the boiling mixture all over your legs . Imagine she then ran away from the situation , not knowing you own a car , because she could not take the indignity of getting on the tube with you and left you with the bill . So in great pain you managed to get to a 7/11 where you treated your badly burned legs as best you know how , with ice and cling film, giving yourself time to get the burns treated by a doctor and if that wasn't bad enough no one stopped to ask if you were ok or in need of help .

...

Welcome to the twilight zone .

Lucky you had your socks, or you'd have had to go thirsty.

I was trying to find that post to quote in another thread where someone was suggesting real men drink from funnels, not glasses

SC

"Alternatively , I grab the bottle and in frutration smash the top of the kneck off . Then I filter the water of life through an old sock , preferably with no holes , into a bucket to much aplause from my fiff raff chums. The good auld days .

xcusemeisthertoopeezinaplause? "

I had to tool about to find it .

I should've searched on 'kneck'

and then filtered out all the 'kneckert's

When I first read it, I'd misread fiff raff for riff raff, not realising you were recounting a tale from the Kingdom of Fife.

Anyway, the closest to a weirdo I've met here.. well, I'll not bore you with the whole story, I'm sure you've all heard it before

"... so I drank up quick as I could and made a polite exit. It was just like being back home - I'm never going back!"

SC

[onionluke]

"The Fiff Raff " . Nicely coined , but I will not take credit as it was mere poor spelling .

Mrs Malatrope will be pinning in her grate .

[StreetCowboy]

"The Fiff Raff " . Nicely coined , but I will not take credit as it was mere poor spelling .

Mrs Malatrope will be pinning in her grate .

I never knew she was cremated.

SC

[luckizuchinni]

I've met pretty much all of A Squadron SAS at one time or another over the years, mostly in or around Nana, there was a time there when I almost started to believe that Nana really was a secret SAS base

That's ridiculous! Everyone knows it is a secret SEALS base! (Maybe the SAS gents are there on an exchange tour?)

[Beetlejuice]

I met a weird wanke_r in 1993 who took me for a beer and threatened to kill himself before the end of the night. He is now my best mate.

That funny.

All my mates are weird wanke_rs as well. It`s only me that`s perfect.

It`s a small world.

[tombkk]

what about the fella who has profiles on every Thai Visa poster and cross references every post anyone makes with what they have posted previously

Certainly classifies as weird. In fact, I think there is more than one Thai Visa member in this category...

[tombkk]

Yea I once saw this weird looking farang constantly giggling at the corner of a coffeeshop with his thai young lovebird while I was trying to enjoy my favorite ladnaa. He looked like one of those atomic scientists who just got released from the Iranian prison after had been kidnapped and held for40 yrs in captivity by the Ayatollah Khamenei.

Geez at least some of these old geezers would have thought better to groom themselves up first before a date!....like a smart dress, pressed shirt, a bit of face moisturizer ,a few tweezies here & there around the eyebrows / mustasche etcs….

Actually it's not an uncommon sight with many farangs in Thailand really. Why do many farangs in Thailand are so down right dirty or unkept looking?

Hm. Maybe that's how farangs are on average, and this is not particular to Thailand?

[Heimdallr]

I once met a foreigner who told his bargirl wife was beautiful.

[chiang mai]

I once met a foreigner who told his bargirl wife was beautiful.

And was she?