A Female Luk Kruengs Viewpoint

[eek]

Came across this readers submission in stickman. Thought her pov was quite interesting. Not sure how well it will go down with some of the guys here though

(source: http://www.stickmanbangkok.com/reader/reader220.html )

Reader's Submissions

A Woman's Point Of View

By Luk Kreung Ying

Do you deserve a “nice” Thai woman?

I want to give you a little background before I launch myself onto my soapbox. I am a half Thai, half American 28-year-old female. I've grown up in five different countries including Thailand, but was raised primarily western. All of my family reside in Thailand, including my American father.

Edited December 12, 2011 by sbk
edited for fair use- please do not quote the entire article

[Ulysses G.]

She seems to have something against whoring, drunk losers. Boys will be boys.

[ludditeman]

Her PoV is the same as any other American female's.

We came here to avoid American females, not have to listen to their daft rants.

If I wanted to live with a fat, opinionated, woman my own age who hates men, I could have stayed where I was.

(Please note that not all 4 points in the previous sentence applies to all American women, just my previous wife)

That's just my Pov!

Edited December 12, 2011 by ludditeman

[onionluke]

Is it a dating agency questionairre ?

[Ulysses G.]

Not a good idea. He will be a whoring, drunk loser in no time.

Anyway, I feel fortunate to be bringing my own farang boyfriend with me, as it doesn’t seem like there will be many nice ones already there.

[Moonrakers]

Believe me, women can overlook your beer gut

Overlook, or look over?

[onionluke]

Believe me, women can overlook your beer gut

Overlook, or look over?

They have been known to climb that mountain when they get to it .

[MJo]

Indeed sounds american. Thinks Bangkok is whore hangout and recommends Phuket instead...

[edwardandtubs]

There are lots of wonderful Thai women who want farang husbands. Every time I am there on vacation and women find out I have a farang boyfriend and live in the west, they ask me to help them find a husband. These women aren’t hookers nor are they so very high class that you have to be very rich or handsome either. They are sweet everyday women that work in hair salons, restaurants, stores and travel agencies.

So very true. It's depressing how many westerners come here and marry whores when there are so many good Thai women (better looking and better morals) who would like to marry them. I think it's a combination of the guy's low self-esteem and a lack of understanding of Thai society and culture.

Although times are changing, “good” women don’t go to bars, don’t drink and don’t smoke.

What nonsense! Although they don't go to "farang bars", many of them certainly love to party and drink and even smoke.

[ludditeman]

So very true. It's depressing how many westerners come here and marry whores when there are so many good Thai women (better looking and better morals) who would like to marry them. I think it's a combination of the guy's low self-esteem and a lack of understanding of Thai society and culture.

Unfortunately, if I were a Thai lady with morals of any sort, I wouldn't want to associate with me.

(PS. parody of Grouch Marx 'I wouldn't join any club that would have me as a member')

[Moonrakers]

Although times are changing, "good" women don't go to bars, don't drink and don't smoke.

What nonsense! Although they don't go to "farang bars", many of them certainly love to party and drink and even smoke.

Just noticed that and yeah, what nonsense.

There's plenty of good female company to be found in pubs around the country. Oh, and Mrs Rakers likes to join me in the pub, this lady must be suggesting my misses is not a good woman.

[Johnniey]

She didn't mention what she classes here father as, and where he met her mum.

Live and let live - why the need to attack the kind of guy that comes here for sex.

I'm sure a psychologist could tell us why.

Edited December 12, 2011 by Johnniey

[rgs2001uk]

"Thai women are not going to sleep with you easily unless they are prostitutes"

Little Miss Hello Kitty HiSo wanabee needs to get of her soapbox and get out a bit more.

[a99az]

Sounds spot on to me, and my wife agrees with her.

[ludditeman]

Relationships are about commitment, love and trust, regardless of what country the woman is from. Relationships take work and you get what you give. Thai bargirls are not the magical solution to having to work at a commitment. Sure, a 20-year-old prostitute might be able to look at a fat, bald man in his fifties and tell him everything he wants to hear for a few weeks;

20 minutes is generally long enough for me.

There are lots of wonderful Thai women who want farang husbands. Every time I am there on vacation and women find out I have a farang boyfriend and live in the west, they ask me to help them find a husband. These women aren't hookers nor are they so very high class that you have to be very rich or handsome either.

But they nearly all shag on the first date and take the money offered in the morning.

First of all, it's appalling for anyone to go to Thailand and only see Bangkok and/or Pattaya. These are basically known as whore hangouts. Why not take in some of the culture and go to Phuket or Chiangmai (a most excellent and exciting city). There's prostitutes in those areas too if you absolutely can't live without one.

Chiang Mai allegedly has more than 300 short-time hotels and over 100 brothels. I'm told Phuket is worse.

You can meet women everywhere. Hell, even go have your hair washed in a salon, it'll be the best couple bucks you spend, you lay on a bed and they scrub your head for ages. Sure it's girly, but there's a lot of women hanging out there too.

Many Thai guys go to salons and beauty parlors to score a prostitute, it's one of the traditional hang-outs for pros (and coffee shops)

Backpackers and sex tourists are disgusting to Thais and to pretty much everyone but themselves.

I think you are being a bit hard on backpackers!

Edited December 12, 2011 by ludditeman

[poanoi]

Chiang Mai also had 43% of prostitutes HIV positive in a study in 1980's,

i dare not think of how many was gonorrhea positive

[MJo]

Sounds spot on to me, and my wife agrees with her.

Of course it is. Just that it is not anything new. We all know where the good girls hang out, in Thailand and in any other country for that matter.

Also peoples priorities differ, for someone already with few families/divorces under their belt are not necessarily concerned as long as the ride is good and fun. Now compare that to early career bloke in late 20's with rose tinted glasses on house, car and 2.5 kids.

She does come out rather naive western woman. Not that there would not be naive thai women with western morals nowadays...

[StreetCowboy]

She seems to have something against whoring, drunk losers. Boys will be boys.

I suppose we shouldn't take it personally.

When I say 'we', I mean 'you', of course. I would never do any of that. Good idea about the comb-over, though...

SC

Edited December 12, 2011 by StreetCowboy

[MrHammer]

It's always funny when common sense gets made up to be some sort of enlightened opinion in Thailand. Why should this be controversial at all? Of course, relationships that start off as financial will likely continue to be financial. Also laughed a bit that good girls don't go to bars and drink, of course they do, they go Ekamai, RCA, Ratchada, Kao San Road and everywhere in between, though they stay away from areas which gets tourists as tourists = prostitutes and few decent women want to be mistaken for a whore by some grandpa from Germany.

I think the one major challenge in meeting quality women in Thailand is language. There are basically only two types of girls here who speak good English and they are either educated, often from abroad, or working in the tourist industry. Can you imagine how many conversations you are missing out on, when you can't speak Thai? I know I must have met the first 100 girls I'd like to talk to but gave up when they couldn't speal English.

[ludditeman]

Can you imagine how many conversations you are missing out on, when you can't speak Thai? I know I must have met the first 100 girls I'd like to talk to but gave up when they couldn't speal English.

Well I can speak Thai, and you'll have to trust me on this one, you haven't missed anything.

Typical examples

How much you liked that food you just eat 20 mins.

What thieves hilltribe people are (racist, not proper Thai rants).

How ugly Issan girls are (dark skin)

What is snow like.

And that's just the interesting conversations. Attractive young Thai girls just aren't all that interesting.

Edited December 12, 2011 by ludditeman

[norrona]

Can you imagine how many conversations you are missing out on, when you can't speak Thai? I know I must have met the first 100 girls I'd like to talk to but gave up when they couldn't speal English.

Well I can speak Thai, and you'll have to trust me on this one, you haven't missed anything.

Typical examples

How much you liked that food you just eat 20 mins.

What thieves hilltribe people are (racist, not proper Thai rants).

How ugly Issan girls are (dark skin)

What is snow like.

And that's just the interesting conversations. Attractive young Thai girls just aren't all that interesting.

+1

[WarpSpeed]

Although times are changing, “good” women don’t go to bars, don’t drink and don’t smoke.

What nonsense! Although they don't go to "farang bars", many of them certainly love to party and drink and even smoke.

Actually I think that's exactly the point she was making..

[HardenedSoul]

Can you imagine how many conversations you are missing out on, when you can't speak Thai? I know I must have met the first 100 girls I'd like to talk to but gave up when they couldn't speal English.

Well I can speak Thai, and you'll have to trust me on this one, you haven't missed anything.

Typical examples

How much you liked that food you just eat 20 mins.

What thieves hilltribe people are (racist, not proper Thai rants).

How ugly Issan girls are (dark skin)

What is snow like.

And that's just the interesting conversations. Attractive young Thai girls just aren't all that interesting.

Hmm . . . that's interesting. I was giving consideration to learning to speak the language to, perhaps, intermediate level. I probably will go ahead and make the effort but I suppose it's useful to know what to expect from some of the women.

[cardholder]

"Thai women are not going to sleep with you easily unless they are prostitutes"

Little Miss Hello Kitty HiSo wanabee needs to get of her soapbox and get out a bit more.

Like her father did !

He got a Thai shag and look at the result.

[HardenedSoul]

As far as the article writer's musings on farang men, she's right on several points but I think her lack of experience of one half of her heritage is obvious in some parts. Her generalization that Thai men are lazy, cheating drunks is seriously wide of the mark. It reads like grievances passed down from her mother or, perhaps, stories she's heard from other Thai women with a predilection for foreigners. The facts speak for themselves; if Thai women preferred farangs, there'd be a hell of a lot more "luk kreungs" hopping around.

As I said on another thread where the OP was seeking input with regard to impending nuptials with his Thai girlfriend, the overwhelming majority of Thai women would prefer a THAI man for obvious reasons including sharing same culture and language. Adolescent Thai girls don't fantasize about white or black men or pin posters of them on their walls; they have male idols who are distinctively Thai albeit covered with a couple of coats of Dulux Matt White emulsion.

From what I've seen, it is chiefly Thai women of a certain age who are, perhaps, raising one child or more alone that tend to give farang guys the green light since most financially-solid, respectable Thai men will be loathe to take on an over-ripe Thai woman and her spawn. Many farang guys, however, will.

[GreenSnapper]

"Thai women are not going to sleep with you easily unless they are prostitutes"

Little Miss Hello Kitty HiSo wanabee needs to get of her soapbox and get out a bit more.

Not that wrong: many 'good' girls do it only after the second meeting.

[Roadman]

It's always funny when common sense gets made up to be some sort of enlightened opinion in Thailand. Why should this be controversial at all? Of course, relationships that start off as financial will likely continue to be financial. Also laughed a bit that good girls don't go to bars and drink, of course they do, they go Ekamai, RCA, Ratchada, Kao San Road and everywhere in between, though they stay away from areas which gets tourists as tourists = prostitutes and few decent women want to be mistaken for a whore by some grandpa from Germany.

I think the one major challenge in meeting quality women in Thailand is language. There are basically only two types of girls here who speak good English and they are either educated, often from abroad, or working in the tourist industry. Can you imagine how many conversations you are missing out on, when you can't speak Thai? I know I must have met the first 100 girls I'd like to talk to but gave up when they couldn't speal English.

Agree especially with the opening "common sense" bit.

The language issue is a hurdle but not a barrier. The types of girl who work in the tourist industry and speak some or a little English are not all bargirls. I know of plenty of girls who are the 'nice' type that the author is refering to who work around English speaking people who are not educated beyond basic school levels but who have the same "common sense" to grasp opportunities for personel improvement.

The first big chunk of Thai girls (not a 100 though) I met were on my first trip solo through Isaan armed only with a Thai/ falang two way dictionary / phrasebook had a lot fell into your gave up group. But as it was the cute Isaan girls that caught my attention it was which one was next. I had a lot of fun learning basic thai and them some basic English from those thai girls that did not give up. The most common sense thing I did was learn thai early on for the golden rule phrase that females fall for more often than not "excuse me, can you help me please". Of course being slim, well dressed, sober, shaven and clean as the author suggets also went a long way. The 'nice' thai girl I finally settled on and married after years of seeking spoke a little English when I met her, but made the effort through an Aussie girl (thank god though that not every second word is "mate") that worked with her and computer based language translation software to learn to communicate better in Engish.

In most aspects of the authors soapbox spiel I totally agree with her, but again its all just common sense.

[edwardandtubs]

As I said on another thread where the OP was seeking input with regard to impending nuptials with his Thai girlfriend, the overwhelming majority of Thai women would prefer a THAI man for obvious reasons including sharing same culture and language. Adolescent Thai girls don't fantasize about white or black men or pin posters of them on their walls; they have male idols who are distinctively Thai albeit covered with a couple of coats of Dulux Matt White emulsion.

I can't say I've been in the bedroom of an adolescent Thai girl recently but certainly university girls and young women seem to fantasise about (white) Premier League footballers like Andy Carroll more than anything.

[Beetlejuice]

Lets look at this realistically.

The Western attitudes towards guys in they’re 40s and over, are that by middle age should be out of the game, give in and lay down to die.

If a middle-aged man of little wealth in the West becomes divorced or widowed then his chances of finding a nice desirable lady either for a relationship or as a permanent partner are virtually zilch. I say desirable, not solely for reasons of lust, but of course no one should be expected to live with a partner they don’t fancy. This applies to male, female and gay relationships. They do have the choice of meeting someone closer to their own age groups, but that depends on whether a guy would prefer a mother figure or a lover? Because many of us not so young anymores are still young at heart and not ready to settle down by the fireside, smoking a pipe, wearing slippers and watching TV all day.

Many middle aged guys actually come to Thailand and other South East Asian countries believing that they going to find the nice girl of their dreams and rekindle they’re younger days, a new beginning for them. But of course it doesn’t always work this way. The girl’s statement that there are lots of Thai woman seeking farang husbands that no need to be rich or handsome is true to a point. But there is little chance that a 20 or 30 something Thai female is going to fancy a 60 year old farang male. This is when the money factor kicks in and the relationship becomes a marriage of convenience for both parties. The older guy gets a desirable wife with a young outlook and the younger wife gains financial stability. Not my cup of tea, but the deal does suit some people.

In many cases these guys may seek solace within the bar scene or other types of adult establishments. Reason is that there are very few other options left open to them regarding romantic interactions with the opposite sex. A lady of ill repute or a nice middleclass educated girl, either way it`s going to cost them.

For those that like to regard these men as sad old losers should consider the alternatives for them, such as, feeding the ducks at a park or acting as the kindly old man telling fairy stories to children and so on.

The younger guys should take into consideration that in the not so distant future they will be middle aged and by Western attitudes be expected to gracefully bail out of the game.

It`s obvious that this American girl believes that men should abide by the unwritten rules of Western attitudes, what is considered decent and what is not, that every generation has they’re role to play and should never deviate from how they are expected to act.

Total rubbish in my opinion. She is just another feministic hi so decency freak preaching her so called moral standards to what she considers as the perverted over here.

She`s got it completely wrong, it`s not so cut and dry as she believes.

Live and let live is my motto, provided we are not doing any harm to others.

[Zerothai]

am a half Thai, half American 28-year-old female. I've grown up in five different countries including Thailand, but was raised primarily western.

I stop read here

This are the views of a mid-class western woman, not the views of a Thai woman