Going To A Wedding In Bangkok

[corkman]

Hi All,

I will be going to a Thai wedding in Bangkok in the near future. Its a Thai-Thai wedding i.e. both man and woman thai. The wedding reception is at a Sukhumvit hotel, I know the guy - he works in my office (international company). He's a professional, about 35-40 yrs old. I'm a similar age, but I am his "senior" in respect of company position.

My questions are:

1. What is an appropriate wedding gift. Cash I presume, but how much? I don't want to be a skin-flint, but neither do I want to be over generous nor do I want to seem like I'm showing off. I will not be the most affluent person attending the wedding, but similarly many of our junior staff will be there.....

2. What is the appropriate dress code? I'm thinking business suit & tie? I want to fit in, not stand out?

Many thanks in advance for your advice.

[mallyrd]

I would drop the suit and tie and go for smart casual i.e. slacks and jacket.

Money wise, over my time here the weding gift has varied from THB 2k to THB 5k. Generally others do not get to know how much was in your envelope.

[sulasno]

5K would be appropriate

put the cash in an envelope or use the one that comes with the invitation card;

remember to put your name on the envelope (that's the local culture)

[rgs2001uk]

Put a thousand baht note in the envelope, someone somewhere will record the details you can be sure.

Depending on the type of function every wedding I have been to just about all the males wear suits.

[MiG16]

Depends whether you are taking a date too?

If you were planning to give envelop on the lower end of the suggestions above (1000 baht), then add a bit more. My rule used to be: 1000 min for each person attending. The idea is - it's meant to be a gift. So should cover more than what they are paying in food to feed us. These days I think 1500 would be a safe min.

3000 would be a good number if it fits in with your budget and you are somewhat close to the guy.

5000 baht is the high end already. If you are going alone I would say it's a bit much. (unless your position in office is very high.....)

Only people who would give more than that would be: family, very close friends, OR if you are the bride or groom's boss

[paul50]

Because you are his senior it should befit your position. 5k is enough.

[PoorSucker]

Pink envelope.

If you don't write your name on the card 1000 baht.

If you write your name on the card 5000 baht.

[corkman]

Thanks guys.

Using the "how much does the catering cost" rule of thumb is a good guide. Its not an especially high end hotel (about 3 star)..... if we were talking about Renaisance or Centara Grand or similar I could see the "cost per head" for guests running up quite quickly..... so I'm happy with the 2,000 - 3,000 baht for the two of us.

I am not "the boss" (although I am senior to him).

The invitation came in a card in an unsealed pink envelope, with my name on the front of it. So - would it be the right thing to just put the cash into that, then seal it up and hand it back?

Suit it is - gonna go with a casual suit, shirt (and tie in my pocket, just in case).

[beano2274]

use the envelope given to you, my wife's boss could not attend our wedding, but he put 3000baht in the envelope, this is a good figure for you to start on, most Thais will give around 1000baht or maybe a little less. You will find a box at a desk when you go there, you sign your name in a book and write something nice, this book is given to the couple to keep as a memento of the day, then you should see a big box where the envelope goes.

Most of my guests for the evening party turned up in casual gear, if you are going to both the morning and evening ceremony then wear casual, but decent as you will have to have your photo taken with bride and groom, everyone does!!

Edited December 17, 2011 by beano2274

[Furbie]

I do about 3-4 weddings of this level a year. In my opinion, if you are the boss or in a respected position above him and its work related, you will need to go in a suit and tie for sure. You will see some younger Thais going with a suit and no tie, but certainly senior people will wear a full suit to a Bangkok hotel wedding – assuming 4-star hotel or above. The only people I have seen at this type of wedding wearing a casual or Thai silk shirt are very, very old Thais or Westerns who think they’re being Thai. It does not look good.

Money is a trickier issue. As others said, it will be recorded. 1,000 THB per guest is good for most circumstances. I would do a bit more if it was my direct staff or if we were actual friends. Many Thais will give 500 to 1,000 - THB. Just put in in the envelope that came with the wedding invitation, it should have your name on it. No need to buy a card.