How To Grow A Chicken......

[IsaanAussie]

This has me seriously very interested. I produce a lot of compost. Rice straw and husks contain lignin which is hard to breakdown, and I though maybe the shiny surface on the quill end of the feathers is sort of the same? Hard to break down the surface so the feathers can germinate.

Just a thought but worth a little experiment. So I got a feed bag and stuffed it with feathers. Then I added a little rice bran and EM so the feathers would ferment and hopefully the germinate. Normally this sort of Bokashi composting takes a few days so I waited and waited.

I looked in the bag and nothing had happened, so I waited some more. Looked again, still no change...

Finally I got tired and laid down for a snooze resting my head of the sweet smelling but non germinating bag of feathers. I give up, try to germinate feathers and end up with nothing more then..... a pillow.

[bunta71]

Tried hydroponics-cultured ducks ones, with mixed results. The trick was to determine the right length of rope to keep them down and under in one place, with changing waterlevels they did tend to flock together and get entangled. One could lose a whole `crop` that way.

Ones fully grown they were absolutely amazing at synchronized swimming, really!

It had the advantage of them following each other with the same moves, catch one... and the rest of them would just follow. It kept the labor cost down considerably.

Global warming stepped in, the ponds became muddy, mud ducks didn't really ......oh well you get the picture.

This still doesn't answer the question I am often asked..." Does a duck fart blow bubbles?"

[Carib]

Tried hydroponics-cultured ducks ones, with mixed results. The trick was to determine the right length of rope to keep them down and under in one place, with changing waterlevels they did tend to flock together and get entangled. One could lose a whole `crop` that way.

Ones fully grown they were absolutely amazing at synchronized swimming, really!

It had the advantage of them following each other with the same moves, catch one... and the rest of them would just follow. It kept the labor cost down considerably.

Global warming stepped in, the ponds became muddy, mud ducks didn't really ......oh well you get the picture.

This still doesn't answer the question I am often asked..." Does a duck fart blow bubbles?"

Funny you should ask, had that same question some time ago: Does a duck blow bubbles.

I asked three ducks, and the first one told me that he was blowing bubbles and the second one told me he was blowing bubbles too. When the third one came out of the water I said; Let me guess you were blowing bubbles too, and the answer was: No, I am bubbles.

Hope this answers your question.

I also wanted to ask them if they quack under water, but for some reason I forgot all about that after talking to the third one.

Edited March 26, 2012 by Carib

[theblether]

I see you're past the initial @How to make a chicken@ stage now theblether so now maybe you would care to purchase one of the rooster outfits from my fancy dress shop?

You'd better be quick...especially this time of year they are clucking out of the barn, so to squawk.

Remember...happy chicks need fathers.

All donations gratefully received.

I was contemplating buying one of your outfits in the hope that I could be roasted by the Chiang Mai Ladyboys.

[overherebc]

This seems to have gone a bit quiet. Does it mean that your feathers now don't give a cluck ?

[necronx99]

This seems to have gone a bit quiet. Does it mean that your feathers now don't give a cluck ?

His chicks hatched but he found it was more trouble than it was worth.

The breast feeding did him in....

[loong]

I am afraid that you are unlikely to have any success as chickens rarely grow from feathers. If they do they even more rarely grow true as they are a special 2 stage hybrid.

They are a hybrid from the Eggplant and a parrot.

The methodology of forming this hybrid is a closely guarded secret and the patent is registered to somebody called Colonel Sanders.

I have no idea how they manage the cross between the parrot and the eggplant, I only know that the scientific term for it is Pollynation. (source - Wilki Seed ia)

The hybrid seeds from the eggplant are then sown to produce chickens. This way thousands of chickens can be produced cheaply from a single cross.

[loong]

This is an example of a tree that didn't grow true from feathers.

I understand that the fruit from this tree can be fermented to make whisky, quite famous for it actually

[smokie36]

I can't believe so many of you don't understand where chickens come from.

Where do you think the phrase "Awright hen?" originated?

[theblether]

Wait a minute, wait a minute!! You're at it again!! I've been sitting outside for the last three days guarding my feathers from the local Native Indians!!....all that wooooohoooohooooing is driving me crazy!!

They are not getting my feathers for a Head Dress thing!!.......these feathers are my babies!!!

I come back in for a minute and Loong is trying to sell my babies to Colonel Sanders and trying to bribe me with a whisky tree!! ( to be fair I might do a deal )......and now Smokie is trying to set me up with a hen......no, no, no!!

My babies, my babies.........

[smokie36]

Its only early Spring yet theblether. The unseasonal weather has affected you, we all recognise that.

Don't expect to see your feathers fly off until the hurricanes of the late April showers.

That's where the term "baby showers" originated.

Sheesh...I thought everyone knew 'bout this stuff.

[necronx99]

Yu're obviosuly not ready for the high tech poultry business Blether.

I suggest you call it quits and move into Haggis rearing or growing Methadone trees where you might be able to get more local assistance.

[David48]

...

They are a hybrid from the Eggplant and a parrot.

...

the scientific term for it is Pollynation. (source - Wilki Seed ia)

My dear Mr loong ... one of the funnyist things written here for a while ...

[theblether]

Nope!!......I shall persist!!.....I shall endure!!.....my babies will be the most beautiful chicks ever seen!!......you just wait and see!!

( by the way that methadone tree idea might be a good one, big demand for that )

[necronx99]

Nope!!......I shall persist!!.....I shall endure!!.....my babies will be the most beautiful chicks ever seen!!......you just wait and see!!

( by the way that methadone tree idea might be a good one, big demand for that )

Just a thought.....have you sexed these feathers you've planted?

Last thing you want is to go through all this hard work just to end up surrounded by a bunch of cocks..

Again...

Edited March 29, 2012 by necronx99

[David006]

Nope!!......I shall persist!!.....I shall endure!!.....my babies will be the most beautiful chicks ever seen!!......you just wait and see!!

( by the way that methadone tree idea might be a good one, big demand for that )

Just a thought.....have you sexed these feathers you've planted?

Last thing you want is to go through all this hard work just to end up surrounded by a bunch of cocks..

Again...

....all these cheep fowl yokes ...

my poultree flowers just need pollynation expecting at least a peck or two of seeds ...

[wdrk7]

Put it under your pillow and the next day you will know the results .

[David006]

diversify?

Maybe while you are waiting for your crop of chickens you may want to consider inter planting with an alternate crop?

Selected Isaan kittens can be planted in your bed at any time of year.....the somewhat darker meat is good eating , not unlike chicken and is excellent for stuffing.

Warning: consumption of immature meat, though probably much sweeter, is frowned upon.......

[theblether]

Nope!!......I shall persist!!.....I shall endure!!.....my babies will be the most beautiful chicks ever seen!!......you just wait and see!!

( by the way that methadone tree idea might be a good one, big demand for that )

Just a thought.....have you sexed these feathers you've planted?

Last thing you want is to go through all this hard work just to end up surrounded by a bunch of cocks..

Again...

OH

That was a low blow Necron.......I'm still getting counselling for that distressing encounter........if anyone doesn't know what Necron is talking about here is the account here.......

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/536998-attack-by-ladyboys-in-chiang-mai/

I did sex the feathers but I'm not at liberty to say how

[theblether]

diversify?

Maybe while you are waiting for your crop of chickens you may want to consider inter planting with an alternate crop?

Selected Isaan kittens can be planted in your bed at any time of year.....the somewhat darker meat is good eating , not unlike chicken and is excellent for stuffing.

Warning: consumption of immature meat, though probably much sweeter, is frowned upon.......

Who would have thought that pussy was a viable business proposition in Thailand?

[theblether]

Good News!!

theblether is pleased to announce that after a gestation period of what seemed like years FINALLY his beautiful babies were brought into thios world at 5.00am yesterday morning.

Today we had a party to celebrate them being one day old........

Please note the lush downy feathers, a result of the excellent suggestion to cross pollynate with an ostrich.

theblether is doing fine, just in case your wondering.

I'm such a proud father.

[David48]

Maybe after you have watched their individual charactistics, you might want to name them?

OH ... I don't think Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner are appropiate names for the little ones ... PAPA

Oh, just looking that them and maybe on day one sexing them correctly maybe a little difficult I have consulted with others on the Farming Forum here and have come to the conclusion that there sexes are as follows ...

Let us know what you decide about the naming please.

EDIT

Important ... you have to open the photo to view their gender as described.

Edited April 1, 2012 by David48

[oldestswinger]

Glad you were able to carry out my suggestion of grafting with ostrich feathers. After seeing the picture you posted of an ostrich trying to do something impossible with a rhino, I thought you were completely bonkers. i'm happy to see I was wrong!

[kevjohn]

I am afraid that you are unlikely to have any success as chickens rarely grow from feathers. If they do they even more rarely grow true as they are a special 2 stage hybrid.

They are a hybrid from the Eggplant and a parrot.

The methodology of forming this hybrid is a closely guarded secret and the patent is registered to somebody called Colonel Sanders.

I have no idea how they manage the cross between the parrot and the eggplant, I only know that the scientific term for it is Pollynation. (source - Wilki Seed ia)

The hybrid seeds from the eggplant are then sown to produce chickens. This way thousands of chickens can be produced cheaply from a single cross.

I have only just come across this very informative topic started by the one and only “theblether” and found it on par with another topic that I was involved with, quite regularly, until I had problems with my ISP. I cant go into detail but here is a link to that topic….http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/554349-thailand-needs-cricket/

Now I would like to refer to loong’s post #37 as I find this very interesting.

He mentions ‘Colonel Sanders’ and, my first thought is Kentucky Fried Chicken.

And, as the many ways of growing chicken, is what is being thrown about here, I would like to introduce my particular cross… being “Kentucky Derby chicken”.

Even thouhh this is an excellent cross… I do have some problems…being

(1) I find with my variety, that they run too fast, making it extremely had to catch them.

(2) When I do manage to catch them…..they all want to be first.

(3) They do not seam to be ashamed about stripping. And lastly

(4) There is a lot of time involved preparing them for meal time.

So. If any of our chicken growers or even EMU growers and growers of that other smaller bird the parrot, can help me with the predicament that I find myself in, I’m sure theblether could well use this “knowledge “ in relation to setting up his Chicken business

All help, advice, or what ever will be graciously received.

Edited May 19, 2012 by kevjohn

[Rsquared]

Thanks Blether, and all who participated.

Had a good laugh and always good to escape negative threads and trashing. It is definitely amazing what you can learn on TV.

Cheers

[Rsquared]

Thanks Blether, and all who participated, had a good laugh.

Always good to escape negative threads and trashing.

Amazing what one can learn on TV

Cheers.

[grimleybob]

]

Thanks David for reminding us of this thread.

I once owned a randy old cockerel who started shagging my sheep.

After seeing the offspring ( very cute)

I thought I'd let nature take it's course but after a couple of months I had to stop. I couldn't stand being woken up every morning at 4am to the sound of "cock a doodle baaaaaaaaaaaa"

Nice to eat tho tasted like a cross between chicken and lamb with mint and onion stuffing.

[cooked]

mmm... how do you guys kill your chickens, sorry to bring a sombre tone to the discussion. I recently read that the chopping block method isn't good for the meat?

[grimleybob]

mmm... how do you guys kill your chickens, sorry to bring a sombre tone to the discussion. I recently read that the chopping block method isn't good for the meat?

I usually tell them a joke

[grimleybob]

mmm... how do you guys kill your chickens, sorry to bring a sombre tone to the discussion. I recently read that the chopping block method isn't good for the meat?

I usually tell them a joke

Seriously I would hold legs in left hand, cup head in right with 2 fingers either side of neck and the beak in the palm, then force head back untill you feel the skull seperate from the neck. This will leave a void for the blood to drain into when you hang the chicken. It's not as messy as chopping it's head off. This method also works with rabbits and small thin necked wives