Having been in Pattaya for well over a year I realise something is missing in my life. Women. Not any old women, not women working in the bars and similar places, but good, normal women who want a relationship for the sake of a relationship and all that it brings. A woman who kisses you because she wants to. One who holds your hand because she wants to. Not one whose main interest is money first.

Before some of you shout that there are good women in Pattaya, I know there are. But they are very hard to find.

What, more than anything, that has made me understand what I am missing are the nurses in the 2 hospitals and the clinic I have been visiting recently. They are so friendly and nice. Chatting to them makes me hanker for the days back in the small towns and villages. I'm jealous of you guys and gals who have this sort of life.

The nurses who I have been talking to understand the scene here and find it hard to believe there are men who do not go to the ago-go bars every night or have lady bar on their arm. I have given up trying to convince them otherwise.

Flicking through some dating sites and talking to some ladies there, they are not happy when they find out where I am currently living. They have preconceived notions of us who live here. Now i hide that fact in my profiles.

Don't get me wrong, Pattaya is a great place to be in many respects. Good food, the islands, the music, plenty of people talking and understanding English. Most of all are the friends I have made since I have been here. I've had some wonderful nights out and some great laughs, but I do miss a genuine woman on my arm.

So, what is a man to do?

I've been looking at Khon Kaen, Udon Thani and a few other places and they seem like good places to me. Bangkok is not my scene. Chiang Mai is out because of the smoke and smog times.

What do you think?

Are there good places to go in Pattaya where the Thai women want a man first and not an ATM first?

Or where would you be?

Thats one thing i miss with women back at home,you can talk about movies,music,old school friends,worldly experiences,sometimes i find the cultural differences here too much

When you write your ad ... never say that you reside in Pattaya ... ChonBuri is a much better option ... and not lying either ...

OH ... PD ... you sound like a bit of an old romantic dog?

Dude,

You seem to me to be having a bit of a crisis over nothing.

If you think a girl is incapable of showing or having real emotions just because she works in a bar, then it says more about you than it does them.

My advice would be to maybe try being a Cheap Charlie fr a while and see which birds stick around.

Even Jomtien sounds better than the p word

Nice post and in some respects a brave post, to admit you want to

break out of the mould.

Think a lot of it is to do with mindset, you look on every woman in

Pattaya as a hooker and you think they look on you as a walking

ATM.....game set and match.

I went through the same process some years ago, desperate to

meet a straightforward Thai woman. It happened without me

realising when I got friendly with a girl who worked in a large

Bangkok hotel, she suggested on my next visit we could

perhaps go away together....talk about knock me over with a

feather.

End story, we have now been married for five years.

Yes, there are nice girls out there.... even in Pattaya.

That's one reason I'd never settle in Pattaya.

And 'Chonburi' ... Come on, that's what the bargirls say who want to hide the facts.

Good on the OP for being honest with us (and more importantly himself).

Good luck for the future.

Sent from iPhone; please forgive any typos or violations of forum rules

It's a pity you have ruled out Bangkok, I do think there is more availabilty of the kind of girl your after here. I could probably ask around in the office for you, but would not want the ear ache if it went wrong

Nice post mind and i think most people do miss having a SO in their life if they have been single for a while.

Excellent post PD. There are worse places than Udonthani.. I know many people who are extremely happy there.

It's a pity you have ruled out Bangkok, I do think there is more availabilty of the kind of girl your after here. I could probably ask around in the office for you, but would not want the ear ache if it went wrong

Nice post mind and i think most people do miss having a SO in their life if they have been single for a while.

Yes I would agree with that. Although I can't really compare with other Thai cities, there are plenty nice and decent women in Bangkok, of various nationalities.

Sent from iPhone; please forgive any typos or violations of forum rules

Even Jomtien sounds better than the p word

Better he went up market to Nahklua than down market to Jomtien.

Thats one thing i miss with women back at home,you can talk about movies,music,old school friends,worldly experiences,sometimes i find the cultural differences here too much

I agree 100%. As much as I appreciate what my Thai lady does for me, our conversations never reach much more than a superficial level. She is probably more westernised than a lot of Thai women, enjoys falang food and has a similar taste in movies to myself, but is not particularly worldly. I figure it's all a trade-off though. I had quite a few western women partners that were stimulating conversationalists but total b**ches in many other ways. Refused to iron a shirt because it opposed their feminist ideals, and yet quite happy to have me pay for dinner.

Thats one thing i miss with women back at home,you can talk about movies,music,old school friends,worldly experiences,sometimes i find the cultural differences here too much

Movies - rent some quality DVDs.

Music - play your music in the car.

Old school friends - didn't your so go to school?

Worldly experiences - take your so to other countries.

In other words, be patient and nurture. Same as farang farang relationships.

I've been looking at Khon Kaen, Udon Thani and a few other places and they seem like good places to me. Bangkok is not my scene. Chiang Mai is out because of the smoke and smog times.

If you move, remember that you must never mention to anyone where you previously lived, show photos, or even say the name of that town out loud.

If you do, you will be labeled and nobody in your new town will ever forget it.

It took you a whole year to realise this?

Funny enough, I met my missus while she was working as a nurse at bumrungrad, now we live east side pattaya with 2 of our own sprogs....but before you think of doing the same thing let me tell you that I am handome, rich, witty and romantic. Not many can pull it off.

Flames and the replies to them have been removed.

Before you say "Bangkok is not my scene..." Try to take some days here, where you get OUT of central bangkok - there are so many nice, green area's - and many friendly girls, that will not see you as, at walking ATM - but a good alternative to a Thai guy, who is to lazy, beats her up and uses her salary getting pissed up on Sangsom

But Khon Kaen is a nice city, i like it a lot...and 5km out of town, there are green and nice :-)

- and many friendly girls, that will not see you as, at walking ATM - but a good alternative to a Thai guy, who is to lazy, beats her up and uses her salary getting pissed up on Sangsom

some people would aim a little higher than that i would hope .........

If you live outside the Chiang Mai City area the smog is nowhere near as bad as some would like you to believe. They could be telling you things are bad because we have a lot of fine women to choose from up here and they don't want to share them. I only need one so you are welcome to come and take your pick !

That's one reason I'd never settle in Pattaya.

And 'Chonburi' ... Come on, that's what the bargirls say who want to hide the facts.

Or they dont live in Pattaya and live in another part of Chonburi.. Like my mrs and I (sriracha)... She works 8:30-5:30 while I sit at home working there. some months she can actually earn more then I! 5555

Good to see ThaiVisa is still full of jaded men that tried it with a whore not so nice girl and got duped.

Nice post and in some respects a brave post, to admit you want to

break out of the mould.

Think a lot of it is to do with mindset, you look on every woman in

Pattaya as a hooker and you think they look on you as a walking

ATM.....game set and match.

I went through the same process some years ago, desperate to

meet a straightforward Thai woman. It happened without me

realising when I got friendly with a girl who worked in a large

Bangkok hotel, she suggested on my next visit we could

perhaps go away together....talk about knock me over with a

feather.

End story, we have now been married for five years.

Yes, there are nice girls out there.... even in Pattaya.

So you met her only the once and then she suggested that you go away together...yea she sounds like a real 'nice' girl...ha ha.

No, I got to know her over several visits - sure they are your sprogs,

those nurses get pretty frisky on night shift.

Nice post and in some respects a brave post, to admit you want to

break out of the mould.

Think a lot of it is to do with mindset, you look on every woman in

Pattaya as a hooker and you think they look on you as a walking

ATM.....game set and match.

I went through the same process some years ago, desperate to

meet a straightforward Thai woman. It happened without me

realising when I got friendly with a girl who worked in a large

Bangkok hotel, she suggested on my next visit we could

perhaps go away together....talk about knock me over with a

feather.

End story, we have now been married for five years.

Yes, there are nice girls out there.... even in Pattaya.

So you met her only the once and then she suggested that you go away together...yea she sounds like a real 'nice' girl...ha ha.

No, I got to know her over several visits - sure they are your sprogs,

those nurses get pretty frisky on night shift.

Now, now children, play nice.

Nice post and in some respects a brave post, to admit you want to

break out of the mould.

Think a lot of it is to do with mindset, you look on every woman in

Pattaya as a hooker and you think they look on you as a walking

ATM.....game set and match.

I went through the same process some years ago, desperate to

meet a straightforward Thai woman. It happened without me

realising when I got friendly with a girl who worked in a large

Bangkok hotel, she suggested on my next visit we could

perhaps go away together....talk about knock me over with a

feather.

End story, we have now been married for five years.

Yes, there are nice girls out there.... even in Pattaya.

So you met her only the once and then she suggested that you go away together...yea she sounds like a real 'nice' girl...ha ha.

No, I got to know her over several visits - sure they are your sprogs,

those nurses get pretty frisky on night shift.

It really is impossible sometimes to say you have a "good Thai Girl"...

I meet mine on line.. Started out as a help me learn Thai thing... She lived the same town as me.. after talking for a few months we went on a date (she brought a friend), this happened 3 times.. Eventfully on the 4th she came alone.. After 3 more months she slept with me (she was not a virgin). She works 8:30 - 5:30. Stays home and if she goes out, drags me along..

I would say she is a Nice Thai Girl.. The kind of Thai Girl you dream to meet.. But plenty of jaded people here will say she is no good because she (1) dates a farang (2) was not a virgin.

Most would not... But the angry ones are the ones with the most posts I find.. 5555

Nice post and in some respects a brave post, to admit you want to

break out of the mould.

Think a lot of it is to do with mindset, you look on every woman in

Pattaya as a hooker and you think they look on you as a walking

ATM.....game set and match.

I went through the same process some years ago, desperate to

meet a straightforward Thai woman. It happened without me

realising when I got friendly with a girl who worked in a large

Bangkok hotel, she suggested on my next visit we could

perhaps go away together....talk about knock me over with a

feather.

End story, we have now been married for five years.

Yes, there are nice girls out there.... even in Pattaya.

So you met her only the once and then she suggested that you go away together...yea she sounds like a real 'nice' girl...ha ha.

No, I got to know her over several visits - sure they are your sprogs,

those nurses get pretty frisky on night shift.

It really is impossible sometimes to say you have a "good Thai Girl"...

I meet mine on line.. Started out as a help me learn Thai thing... She lived the same town as me.. after talking for a few months we went on a date (she brought a friend), this happened 3 times.. Eventfully on the 4th she came alone.. After 3 more months she slept with me (she was not a virgin). She works 8:30 - 5:30. Stays home and if she goes out, drags me along..

I would say she is a Nice Thai Girl.. The kind of Thai Girl you dream to meet.. But plenty of jaded people here will say she is no good because she (1) dates a farang (2) was not a virgin.

Most would not... But the angry ones are the ones with the most posts I find.. 5555

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

I would say what is more funny is that few guys would even touch a prostitute back home but in Thailand many Western guys marry them.

Sent from iPhone; please forgive any typos or violations of forum rules

The funny thing is that few here would begrudge a 'western' woman her past but find one unforgivable in a Thai woman.

I would say what is more funny is that few guys would even touch a prostitute back home but in Thailand many Western guys marry them.

If 60% of women in the UK were on the game, I'm sure 60% of men in the UK would marry one. (insert own percentage if dissatisfied with mine)

More to do with opportunity than moral choice I think.

I know lots of "good girls" and lots of bad girls and IMO "good girls" are over-rated.

Move to Rayong, or Chonburi city, or Sriracha etc... all close to Pattaya (easy to go back and visit friends), but totally different scene.

Yes Pattayadingo,there certainly are limitations to Thai/Farang Relationships,mostly Cultural and Language barriers,and even a different way of thinking,than your own Countries upbringing,which taught you lifes basic expectations.

In depth conversations in particular are out,and trying to go too deep,only creates frustration for both of the couple,one can never get all you desire from one person,the only answer is to have good mates and fill the gaps by talking to them on your level,regardless of the subject matter.

Long term,what was satisfactory in the early part of the relationship show up large gaping holes in later years.

One has to bend ones principals in later years, and realise their worth,as they are, and try to come to terms,with the deficiencies,and find other mentally satisfying outlets.