Have you made any Thai male friends?

[marquess]

I saw a thread some months ago, about whether or not anyone had managed to make any male Thai friends. I have been searching for it, but can't find it, can anyone help?

[Ulysses G.]

No, but I can tell you that I think that I've made one in 15 years, however, we do a lot of business together, so its hard to be sure.

[Ijustwannateach]

I think I have 2 or 3 real ones, depending on how you define it. But then, I probably have more reason to have male friends. It's Thai *female* friends I don't have any of..... except maybe Bambina!

[marquess]

I have been here for 6 years and haven't made one! It just seem that they all stick together and if your not Thai then forget it.

[Wes Turner]

Surely a case for moderator assistance.

[blabbel]

Well, you'll have to speak some Thai to start with, in my experience.

I made quite a few Thai friends over the years, the standard I apply is that we still stay in touch after either of us moved from the area, and that I could borrow money (a substancial part of their income) if I needed to.

All my friends are working-class, small scale business guys or farmers, though, the people I relate most easily to.

[Neeranam]

I have a few Thai friends through work and also through my wife's friends.

I used to have heaps of male Thai drinking buddies when I was a drunk(but not real friends). Now that I am not a drunk, I've got lots of male Thai friends who are trying to quit, or stay quit(who are very, very good friends).

[blabbel]

Yeah, no shortage of drinking buddies, "puan gin", not "puan tai" (buddies, not friends)...

[sonthaya]

I think I have 2 or 3 real ones, depending on how you define it. But then, I probably have more reason to have male friends. It's Thai *female* friends I don't have any of..... except maybe Bambina!

Speaking of Bambina, where is she I have missed her postings for some time ?

[BangkokBaker]

No, but I can tell you that I think that I've made one in 15 years, however, we do a lot of business together, so its hard to be sure.

Similar situation,I've made a few friends when doing business together,but when business slows

down so are the phone calls and the meetings with the Thai friends..

However during my 10 years in Thailand made a few friends for life but none of them are Thai...

[Rigger]

A few Thais that I would count as friends but most are some how related to the family some how or close friends of the family.

[Patex]

I have a few Thaimale- friends but they usually have not much time because they work hard. One, I know, would do everything for me/us. He is a very funny and polite and intelligent guy and - homosexual

[cdnvic]

Edited title so that it made more sense. Next time use the forum's search engine.

cv

[Ice Maiden]

My brother has loads of Thai male friends, he really bonds with them because he speaks excellent Thai and my brother basically acts like a Thai, he has all the attitudes and everything.

So I've been introduced to them lot and it is safe to say they are my friends. They threaten to slit the throat of any man that touches me though

[Misplaced]

Are you sure you're all living in Thailand?

My ex-farang father has loads of Thai friends, but than again, the bugger speaks better Thai than I do

Edited January 14, 2006 by Misplaced

[ajahnlau]

The language is important. Most of the friends I've made are through the Harley riding so have friends from north to south. These guys are usually businessmen or come from wealthy families. Hard to pay a ckeck bin when sitting with them. Have also made some golfing buddies. Shared interests is the key. Not just drinking and whoring.

[Jiu-Jitsu]

On one occasion, travelling up on the train from Malaysia, I intended on flying to Bangkok from Surat Thani. On the realisation that I had missed the last flight, the only option was to stay on the train, with no cash, only credit cards.

A kindly young Thai male and his female friend paid for my ticket for the rest of the journey to Bangkok. Didn't seem bothered about getting it back. Of course I insisted on taking his details and we met again in the Khaosan road whereupon I returned the money given.

Just wanted to post a positive story, especially as the there has been so many negative things to impart about Thailand of late.

[marquess]

Edited title so that it made more sense. Next time use the forum's search engine.

cv

I did CV but after half an hour of searching, and having e-mailed Geogre, I just gave up!

Back to the matter at hand, I suppose speaking good Thai is the key, but I have come across alot of Thai guys in gov circles, who speak good English, but I have never really been friends with any of them. Just seems that when you are around them they are friendly enough, but then they go back to the group. I have an associate who was complaining the other day, that in twenty years of being here, he hadn't made a single Thai male friend! There is a very them and us mentality.

[LaoPo]

Speaking of Bambina, where is she I have missed her postings for some time ?

She's on holiday I believe...Krabi area, but there's a topic about it; can't find it at the moment, sorry.

Just found it...have a look and goodluck!

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=56204

LaoPo

Edited January 14, 2006 by LaoPo

[Tippaporn]

I never had a problem making Thai male friends. My best male Thai friend I actually met through the Internet while I was still in Chicago. He's told me that I am like a brother to him. He's become one of my best friends, period.

If you don't speak Thai then it makes for a difficult situation. What's there to talk about when you can't talk??

Not sure why it would be a problem if you're personality is friendly and relaxed enough.

[Misplaced]

I never had a problem making Thai male friends. My best male Thai friend I actually met through the Internet while I was still in Chicago. He's told me that I am like a brother to him. He's become one of my best friends, period.

If you don't speak Thai then it makes for a difficult situation. What's there to talk about when you can't talk??

Not sure why it would be a problem if you're personality is friendly and relaxed enough.

You hit the nail on the head. As long as you're friendly, there shouldn't be any issues. May be you should look to see exactly what you're doing or Not doing and change it. IMO, This statEment about "us and them" mentality is garbage. I highly doubt the Thai people are trying to segregate themself from the whites, its all in your head. Actually its the opposite, With the fascination of farang, I think most would gravitate towards you rather than distancing themself from you. So instead of letting others make the effort for your friendship, why not make the "extra" effort for theirs?

[Neeranam]

There is a very them and us mentality.

From who - them or us?

I found that in my first couple of years here, Thais could tell that I was a newcomer. I remember 13 years ago when I worked on Silom Road, I used to get touts rushing up to me sticking things in my face. Some of the girls on soi Pat Pong as well! I can now walk down that road or Sukh. and no one hassles me.

It was my attitude to them that was wrong. You have to change your attitude to them before you can make friends.

Did you have many friend's back home? I found after losing this "I'm better than them" and "they are different attitude", I made many friends.

If you have similar interests; see each other as human beings/equals;not care what others think, then how can you not make friends.

If you really want to make friends, get out of Bangkok. It took me 9 years of living in that shithole to see what it really is like, and what the general people there think of foriegner. All the false smiles, and tourists falling for it.

It's not neccessarily a colour thing.

edited the yellow text as impossible to read Boo

Edited January 15, 2006 by Boo

[Ulysses G.]

There is a very them and us mentality.

From who - them or us?

I found that in my first couple of years here, Thais could tell that I was a newcomer. I remember 13 years ago when I worked on Silom Road, I used to get touts rushing up to me sticking things in my face. Some of the girls on soi Pat Pong as well! I can now walk down that road or Sukh. and no one hassles me.

It was my attitude to them that was wrong. You have to change your attitude to them before you can make friends.

Did you have many friend's back home? I found after losing this "I'm better than them" and "they are different attitude", I made many friends.

If you have similar interests; see each other as human beings/equals;not care what others think, then how can you not make friends.

If you really want to make friends, get out of Bangkok. It took me 9 years of living in that shithole to see what it really is like, and what the general people there think of foriegner. All the false smiles, and tourists falling for it.

It's not neccessarily a colour thing.

Please post in easily read colors and fonts.

I want to know what you have to say.

[camerata]

Shared interests is the key. Not just drinking and whoring.

Agreed. I met all my Thai friends in the old BBS days. We were all computer geeks and they all had an overseas education and spoke fluent English. 12 or 13 years on and we still meet regularly.

[mbkudu]

Every time I pass soi 5 there's a plump, jolly Thai man that says, "Hello my friend, you want massage?" Every time I say, "No thank you my friend." Maybe someday I'll take him up on the offer. The pictures of the massueseses are quite nice, very pretty girls.

[frenchFARANGbkk]

Having Thai friends the Thai way is easy.

Having real friends as in the west is more difficult.

What I mean is that I never found any thai as close to his friend(s) as I can be close to mine. I mean that I can talk about anything (personnal life, feelings, sex...) with my french friends, something that Thai hardly do together....

What's the fuxk to have friends if they are no more than colleagues...?!

[Ulysses G.]

Every time I pass soi 5 there's a plump, jolly Thai man that says, "Hello my friend, you want massage?" Every time I say, "No thank you my friend." Maybe someday I'll take him up on the offer. The pictures of the massueseses are quite nice, very pretty girls.

This sounds like a Thai friend worth getting to know!

[blabbel]

Having Thai friends the Thai way is easy.

Having real friends as in the west is more difficult.

What I mean is that I never found any thai as close to his friend(s) as I can be close to mine. I mean that I can talk about anything (personnal life, feelings, sex...) with my french friends, something that Thai hardly do together....

What's the fuxk to have friends if they are no more than colleagues...?!

Perhaps the concept of friendship is different?

And I didn't find it that easy to make 'real' friends I could rely on in farangland, either. It takes time...

[marquess]

What is the general conecpt of friendship, amongst the average Thai male?

[the_heart_thief]

I have been here for 6 years and haven't made one! It just seem that they all stick together and if your not Thai then forget it.

Yeah, I'm on the same boat as you, Marquess. (Only that I've been here for 4 years. ***chuckles.)