Control Freak Farangs

[andrew]

I have not even suggested I have statisticslly valid data.

You on the otherhand have explicitly stated this behaviour is a statistical insignificance.

Once again CMK, to credibly make such a claim you must have reviewed the statistical data.

Either show us that statistical data or accept your reference to 'statisticsl insignificance' has no credibility.

OK I think I can deal with that. Statistical insignificance is both a word and a number. As a word it means; does not occur more than by random chance. As a number it is somewhere around 5%. So GH and others gave somewhere between 2 and 4 examples out of 30 million women if we are looking at all Thai women. If we are looking at Thai women in relationships with Farang men a lot less than that, say a million or so.

So abuse among Thai women would be statistically insignificant unless some one comes up with a lot more than 4 examples out of a million or 30 million.

What can we say for sure about Thai women that would be statistically significant for purposes of understanding the concept? Thai women have black hair and Thai women speak Thai. A statistically significant percent of Thai women speak Issan/Lao. A statistically insignificant percent of Thai women eat blue cheese on a daily basis.

So if we now all understand the concept statistically insignificant means roughly less than 5% of anything. Maybe 1% or 3% but at any rate less than 5%.

Excellent.

[StreetCowboy]

Very little point on starting a thread on TV and expecting everyone to agree with you.

Especially as you don't actually live in Thailand.

....... and probably can't speak Thai.

He's probably got two heads, as well. Maybe he's a video referee.

[BookMan]

I pose the question for all:

Is there really any relationships that there is not some sort of control directed or exerted by one of the partners?

Control can be exerted in the subtlest of ways

[chiangmaikelly]

I pose the question for all:

Is there really any relationships that there is not some sort of control directed or exerted by one of the partners?

Control can be exerted in the subtlest of ways

When I was a kid the nuns used to put a statue of St Anthony out in the rain until they found what they were looking for. They thought it was control. I always doubted it. But you never know. Maybe St. Anthony didn't like the rain? They were well educated people, good schools in the West and all.

Edited December 26, 2012 by chiangmaikelly

[meom]

So if we now all understand the concept statistically insignificant means roughly less than 5% of anything. Maybe 1% or 3% but at any rate less than 5%.

Google has a lot of statistics regarding abuse in the West where it seems approx 20% of men and 30% of women report to have suffered from abuse by a spouse or intimate partner.

Thailand is not the West but people are people so why would it be any different here?

Personally I don't don't of any abuse cases so maybe that makes it insignificant.

I don't know any people with HIV/AIDS either so maybe that's insignificant as well.

Edited December 26, 2012 by meom

[chiangmaikelly]

So if we now all understand the concept statistically insignificant means roughly less than 5% of anything. Maybe 1% or 3% but at any rate less than 5%.

Google has a lot of statistics regarding abuse in the West where it seems approx 20% of men and 30% of women report to have suffered from abuse by a spouse or intimate partner.

Thailand is not the West but people are people so why would it be any different here?

Personally I don't don't of any abuse cases so maybe that makes it insignificant.

I don't know any people with HIV/AIDS either so maybe that's insignificant as well.

I don't know that they are. Maybe they are the same. All I was saying, that based on a sample of 2 to 4 people the results would be insignificant. Need a lot more date to come to come kind of significant conclusion.

[Tim7]

The word is "Insecure".....well im not taking sides but ah we must not put an assumption that this guys are treating their wives badly. I think we must always know whats the story behind it and who's telling the truth because what i learned here is the opposite sometimes we don't know why would they treat the lady in this manner especially Thailand.Thai ladies are good in making up things(exaggerate) and some have two or three man in their lives to support her and maybe the husband found out.All only for one thing 'Money'. I know some stories like that why the man wouldn't allow her to put make up or don't let her wear mini skirts sounds more like Arabs the 'Male Chauvinist'. I think you guys had stayed here long enough to learn about Thai ladies,well if you're lucky you would find one who is not only loyal but has a beautiful heart as they say its not easy to find one in Thailand. Maybe one out ten. Im lucky to have one.

Most of their wives or girlfriend is half their age so and you if you do not shower them enough with money or materials so be it they will always have their own ways of getting it. Especially for older guys i've seen that they are very insecure when their wives or girlfriend look at other guys especially Thai man and they will get a brain wash saying Thai mans are no good and so...actually the ladies themselves had gave a bad impression about local mans when they newly knew each other and always stays that way. The best way to find out is to read some of the books written by Farangs that shared the same experience or maybe some of this guys are really sick and have problems with relationship and divorced many times.

The best advice is to know both sides of stories and who suffered most from the relationship,is it the man or the lady?

[BookMan]

So if we now all understand the concept statistically insignificant means roughly less than 5% of anything. Maybe 1% or 3% but at any rate less than 5%.

Google has a lot of statistics regarding abuse in the West where it seems approx 20% of men and 30% of women report to have suffered from abuse by a spouse or intimate partner.

Thailand is not the West but people are people so why would it be any different here?

Personally I don't don't of any abuse cases so maybe that makes it insignificant.

I don't know any people with HIV/AIDS either so maybe that's insignificant as well.

I don't know that they are. Maybe they are the same. All I was saying, that based on a sample of 2 to 4 people the results would be insignificant. Need a lot more date to come to come kind of significant conclusion.

20% and 30 % are high rates of abuse, in my opinion anyway.

I haven't seen a link to your stats but I will take them at face value.

If this is the rate in western countries, across a range of different countries, then it makes sense that you could apply the same rough figures to westerners with Thai spouses

[andrew]

20% and 30 % are high rates of abuse, in my opinion anyway.

I haven't seen a link to your stats but I will take them at face value.

Please try to keep up.

The Guardian, June 7, 2011:

http://www.guardian....ic-violence-men

"Men still represent a substantial proportion of people who are assaulted, injured or killed by an intimate partner (50%, 30% and 25% respectively)"

[BookMan]

20% and 30 % are high rates of abuse, in my opinion anyway.

I haven't seen a link to your stats but I will take them at face value.

Please try to keep up.

The Guardian, June 7, 2011:

http://www.guardian....ic-violence-men

"Men still represent a substantial proportion of people who are assaulted, injured or killed by an intimate partner (50%, 30% and 25% respectively)"

I think I may have missed many other quotes and posts.

Could you crib note me the exchange between CMK and GH?

[473geo]

GK stated

"Thirdly, I am very well aware of the large number of emasculated (read Pussy Whipped) farangs in Thailand - I've posted on the subject in the past. But the existence of large numbers of emasculated men does not detract from the observation I have made - Though I'm sure a very sound argument can be made that both Pussy Whipped Farangs and Control Freak Farangs share a number of root psychological problems."

How strange, in my opinion the root psychological problems lay with the immature men who feel the need to label a sensible caring non drinking family person "pussy whipped".......it would appear there are 'an awful lot' of these type of immature farang in Thailand, I have suffered this abuse being called "pussy whipped" from fellow farang but am big enough to see it for what it is.......

Edited December 26, 2012 by 473geo

[transam]

Very little point on starting a thread on TV and expecting everyone to agree with you.

Especially as you don't actually live in Thailand.

....... and probably can't speak Thai.

Hey, back off the can't speak the lingo thing, l can't, but l have nooooooooo probs here. Call it dyslexic lingo deficiency if you like.

[rene123]

I think I may have missed many other quotes and posts.

Could you crib note me the exchange between CMK and GH?

Thanks for my evening laugh.

They sound like two little old ladies discussing the best way to roast a turkey

[transam]

[meom]

So if we now all understand the concept statistically insignificant means roughly less than 5% of anything. Maybe 1% or 3% but at any rate less than 5%.

Google has a lot of statistics regarding abuse in the West where it seems approx 20% of men and 30% of women report to have suffered from abuse by a spouse or intimate partner.

Thailand is not the West but people are people so why would it be any different here?

Personally I don't don't of any abuse cases so maybe that makes it insignificant.

I don't know any people with HIV/AIDS either so maybe that's insignificant as well.

I don't know that they are. Maybe they are the same. All I was saying, that based on a sample of 2 to 4 people the results would be insignificant. Need a lot more date to come to come kind of significant conclusion.

It depends how many people you know I guess.

According to Dunbar’s Number there’s a limit to the number of people one knows and keeps social contact with and a commonly used value is 150.

Going by this the 2-4 cases of abuse amount to 1.3% - 2.6% of the people known by the OP which is maybe not that significant after all.

[weegee]

Holy Crap BATMAN.....they are still at it. I'll get the Batmobile....Thank god they are not together in a pub!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Rob8891]

Holy Crap BATMAN.....they are still at it. I'll get the Batmobile....Thank god they are not together in a pub!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

+1

Get a room, you guys!

[Scottish Gary]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

Edited December 26, 2012 by Scottish Gary

[TommoPhysicist]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

Excuse me .......

This is a little like writing 'being terrified of running out of rice', heads up here, Thailand is full of shops selling rice!

Edited December 27, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[BookMan]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

Excuse me .......

This is a little like writing 'being terrified of running out of rice', heads up here, Thailand is full of shops selling rice!

That is true, there is a large availability of women but logic does not always come into play regarding relationships.

[StreetCowboy]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

Excuse me .......

This is a little like writing 'being terrified of running out of rice', heads up here, Thailand is full of shops selling rice!

That is true, there is a large availability of women but logic does not always come into play regarding relationships.

Some of us have particular feelings about one particular woman in preference to others; they're not sheep, after all

(I can see the Welsh having a go at me now....)

SC

[BookMan]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

You make a good point re: the former bargirls. It could be a minefield for discontent.

I am not 100% in agreement with the low self esteem issue though. I have known controlling guys in relationships who appear to have reasonable self esteem, good jobs and the like.

Is it a case that guys with lower self esteem are drawn to bargirls? Quite possibly.

I would be interested to know how often alcohol is involved in controlling relationships. I have noticed this to be a factor in Australia among couples, where often the man , while drunk or on drugs, gets paranoid, jealous, irrational, thinks his GF is cheating on him etcetera etcetera. Take away the alcohol in those circumstances and maybe there is not such a problem. I have also noticed over time plenty of men who don't drink who get the same way.

[BookMan]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

Excuse me .......

This is a little like writing 'being terrified of running out of rice', heads up here, Thailand is full of shops selling rice!

That is true, there is a large availability of women but logic does not always come into play regarding relationships.

Some of us have particular feelings about one particular woman in preference to others; they're not sheep, after all

(I can see the Welsh having a go at me now....)

SC

(us Aussies would say the New Zealanders )

The attraction of one woman, over all others, is the downfall of many men. I don't mind admitting I have been victim of this rather strange phenomenon myself (though not with a Thai woman).

For most guys, the reason they shack up together in the first place is they have an overwhelming attraction and desire to be with that one particular woman.

[StreetCowboy]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

You make a good point re: the former bargirls. It could be a minefield for discontent.

I am not 100% in agreement with the low self esteem issue though. I have known controlling guys in relationships who appear to have reasonable self esteem, good jobs and the like.

Is it a case that guys with lower self esteem are drawn to bargirls? Quite possibly.

I would be interested to know how often alcohol is involved in controlling relationships. I have noticed this to be a factor in Australia among couples, where often the man , while drunk or on drugs, gets paranoid, jealous, irrational, thinks his GF is cheating on him etcetera etcetera. Take away the alcohol in those circumstances and maybe there is not such a problem. I have also noticed over time plenty of men who don't drink who get the same way.

I think there are readily-available drugs which have a far greater contribution to paranoia than alcohol, though perhaps that is just because I don't drink enough...

I don't think you should be judging people and making assumptions about their mental illness or otherwise based on your perception of their job. Just because you think their job is good is no reason to deny them their mental illnesses and other foibles. Just because we maintain a good facade and hold down a steady job is no reason to criticise our lack of self esteem, or suggest that our inferiority complex or paranoia is any less than the next man's. I don't go on about how butchers' dogs have an easier life than others, do I? There's too many people on here willing to criticise others without trying to see it from our perspective

SC

[StreetCowboy]

...

(us Aussies would say the New Zealanders )

The attraction of one woman, over all others, is the downfall of many men. I don't mind admitting I have been victim of this rather strange phenomenon myself (though not with a Thai woman).

For most guys, the reason they shack up together in the first place is they have an overwhelming attraction and desire to be with that one particular woman.

Or the dishes need washed

[BookMan]

I think it has more to do with the low self esteem of the man.

Terrified that his wife will run off with another man he basically imprisons them.

With former bar girls his insecurity will be even worse.

He will feel that deep down she has no love for him and and is only their for financial reasons.

You make a good point re: the former bargirls. It could be a minefield for discontent.

I am not 100% in agreement with the low self esteem issue though. I have known controlling guys in relationships who appear to have reasonable self esteem, good jobs and the like.

Is it a case that guys with lower self esteem are drawn to bargirls? Quite possibly.

I would be interested to know how often alcohol is involved in controlling relationships. I have noticed this to be a factor in Australia among couples, where often the man , while drunk or on drugs, gets paranoid, jealous, irrational, thinks his GF is cheating on him etcetera etcetera. Take away the alcohol in those circumstances and maybe there is not such a problem. I have also noticed over time plenty of men who don't drink who get the same way.

I think there are readily-available drugs which have a far greater contribution to paranoia than alcohol, though perhaps that is just because I don't drink enough...

I don't think you should be judging people and making assumptions about their mental illness or otherwise based on your perception of their job. Just because you think their job is good is no reason to deny them their mental illnesses and other foibles. Just because we maintain a good facade and hold down a steady job is no reason to criticise our lack of self esteem, or suggest that our inferiority complex or paranoia is any less than the next man's. I don't go on about how butchers' dogs have an easier life than others, do I? There's too many people on here willing to criticise others without trying to see it from our perspective

SC

I apologise SC. I will try and be more empathetic in future.

[rene123]

Or the dishes need washed

Now that is a fair enough reason. That is another one of the reasons I left Canada in October... no more dishes to wash for 5 or 6 months. I don't THINK I left any dishes in the sink back home. In any case the mice will have nibbled them clean.

[Neeranam]

Example: when i was in a Thai bar a farang and his spouse where arguing quietly. When suddenly the farang grabs her by the arm and exclaimed loudly for everyone to hear:"You can never talk to me like that in front of my friends!" I am sure she had her reasons.. But it doesnt justify the treatment she has just been given. I could only imagine how he treats her at home.

Where was this bar?

You say it was a Thai bar?

How do you know it was his wife?

I never go to Thai or farang bars with my wife.

Farang bars in my experience are always full of old haggard w****s. If I saw a guy grabbing their arm I would think nothing of it.

Edited December 27, 2012 by Neeranam

[cdnvic]

Removed one post. Please don't refer to each other by racial slang.

[ajarnpot]

(us Aussies would say the New Zealanders )

The attraction of one woman, over all others, is the downfall of many men. I don't mind admitting I have been victim of this rather strange phenomenon myself (though not with a Thai woman).

For most guys, the reason they shack up together in the first place is they have an overwhelming attraction and desire to be with that one particular woman.

stay on topic please, there is nothing wrong with a nice warm sheep on a cold night