ozziebloke Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 I would never trivialize someone else's relationship, much less their marriage -- but without knowing any other details than what's been shared, the lady is in need of a ticket back to LOS, preferably one with 3 layovers. It does indeed take 30 seconds to text someone, so as small a thing as that may seem, it speaks to a larger issue, not just one of respect but of caring at all. PARTICULARLY ON YOUR BIRTHDAY! Come on, man. Furthermore, that you allowed your wife sleepovers is ridiculous. What is she seven? Sometimes your a pain with all your youtube Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welsh1 Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 .... and another one bites the dust. Next thing that will have to occur is comments like: My Thai-Wfe/ GF will never act in such a manner. Nevermind. Cheers. Time for a song ,,,Queen another one bites the dust You could be more tactful... Saw a Thai band playing this track in some bar in pattaya, they had it down to to a tea, They sounded awesome, and then they started singing,, Another one pied the duck, hey goona get you to, another one pied the duck 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancealot Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) I would never trivialize someone else's relationship, much less their marriage -- but without knowing any other details than what's been shared, the lady is in need of a ticket back to LOS, preferably one with 3 layovers. It does indeed take 30 seconds to text someone, so as small a thing as that may seem, it speaks to a larger issue, not just one of respect but of caring at all. PARTICULARLY ON YOUR BIRTHDAY! Come on, man. Furthermore, that you allowed your wife sleepovers is ridiculous. What is she seven? Sometimes your a pain with all your youtube Nice to have met you Ozziebloke, Edited February 24, 2013 by Dancealot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HardenedSoul Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 There is something else you need to consider, why have her friends not enouraged her to contact you and make an attempt to patch things up, especially if they know she really loves you but has been hurt by your reaction, in an ideal situation mutual friends would be at least encouraging communication in an attempt to heal the rift.....so what do they know that you do not? That's she's taking a portion off another bloke, perhaps 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 .... and another one bites the dust. Next thing that will have to occur is comments like: My Thai-Wfe/ GF will never act in such a manner. Nevermind. Cheers. Time for a song ,,,Queen another one bites the dust You could be more tactful... Saw a Thai band playing this track in some bar in pattaya, they had it down to to a tea, They sounded awesome, and then they started singing,, Another one pied the duck, hey goona get you to, another one pied the duck I'm hungry now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozziebloke Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 I would never trivialize someone else's relationship, much less their marriage -- but without knowing any other details than what's been shared, the lady is in need of a ticket back to LOS, preferably one with 3 layovers. It does indeed take 30 seconds to text someone, so as small a thing as that may seem, it speaks to a larger issue, not just one of respect but of caring at all. PARTICULARLY ON YOUR BIRTHDAY! Come on, man. Furthermore, that you allowed your wife sleepovers is ridiculous. What is she seven? Sometimes your a pain with all your youtube Nice to have met you Ozziebloke Nice to meet you also I actually enjoy and agree with alot of your posts but sorry not into all your youtube replies. My bad 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trembly Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) @wooloomooloo, When did I say anything about friends going to Thailand and marrying horror-stories? Thais I know who have been abroad fall mainly into two three categories : wealthy hi-so Thais from my international school days, Thais from lower-socio economic backgrounds who go to the west primarily to find wage-work, and Thais who either go there simply for education or genuine marriage. Not much to say about the third category as they're pretty straightforward. Wealthy hi-so Thais tend to stay on the right side of the law because they've hired immigration lawyers and visa agents to do all the leg-work for them and they are used to having the law work for them. Occasionally, if they can be bothered to stay in the west for long enough, they get citizenship. The second category are probably the most diverse. In here you get both males and females who seek to go abroad mainly to work, work, work, save up, and come back to Thailand to reinvest the money. Some invest it in land or business, some invest it in cards and dice. Each to their own. There are three main ways for a Thai in this category to go abroad : go through an international employment agency, hire a bent Thai who is already legal in the west to justify their immigration (this is big business, the going rate is 500'000 for a pukka working visa into Canada, I've recently discovered), or to get in via a marriage visa . . . from the people I've interviewed / conversed with back in Thailand the split is about 50 / 50 between people who make a point of sticking to the rules and those who don't give the rules half a thought once in-country. All it takes is a change of mind (or character, depending on your point of view) to hop between categories. Sorry, I think I've said quite enough. I'll wind my neck in now as I'm only a loog-krueng who has spent most of my life in Thailand and speak 3 Thai dialects fluently whilst having close relationships with Thais from the entire spectrum of society. Edited February 24, 2013 by Trembly 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickylonster Posted February 24, 2013 Author Share Posted February 24, 2013 rijb, thank you for your imput , I do take on board what you say , and am far from perfect in my ways , but respect for one another is the foundation of a harmonious life together , I just feel , my lady has been inconsiderate , and I perhaps have approached it in the only way I know , we got a problem , lets sort it out ! It would appear that I have a lot to learn about cross cultural relationships ! hindsight is a wonderful thing ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wooloomooloo Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 @wooloomooloo, The second category are probably the most diverse. In here you get both males and females who seek to go abroad mainly to work, work, work, save up, and come back to Thailand to reinvest the money. Some invest it in land or business, some invest it in cards and dice. Each to their own. There are three main ways for a Thai in this category to go abroad : go through an international employment agency, hire a bent Thai who is already legal in the west to justify their immigration (this is big business, the going rate is 500'000 for a pukka working visa into Canada, I've recently discovered), or to get in via a marriage visa . . . And immediately, without any shred of evidence, you've applied this paragraph to the OP's situation. How kind and, notwithstanding, disinterested in your Thai status as it's of no relevance to this thread. You're not as worldly as you suggest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rijb Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 rijb, thank you for your imput , I do take on board what you say , and am far from perfect in my ways , but respect for one another is the foundation of a harmonious life together , I just feel , my lady has been inconsiderate , and I perhaps have approached it in the only way I know , we got a problem , lets sort it out ! It would appear that I have a lot to learn about cross cultural relationships ! hindsight is a wonderful thing ! You're welcome. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post aTomsLife Posted February 24, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted February 24, 2013 aToms life , when she first came to the UK , she had funds of her own ,£5.000 + so If she wanted to , she could return to Thailand at any time ,and as for letting her stay over with friends , for me that is not a concern, I have no wish to keep her on a short lead , I have much more respect for than you imply ! I never implied that you didn't have respect for her, just that you don't have a backbone, it seems. And if I seem rather venomous about this, it's because of all the stories I've read of guys getting fleeced in LOS and not having any leverage in the situation. But you have all the leverage here. I think it's ironic that this thread is about respect, meaning her respect for you. But perhaps it should really be about the respect you have for yourself. From my vantage point, it's not looking good for you on that account. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommoPhysicist Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 aToms life , when she first came to the UK , she had funds of her own ,£5.000 + so If she wanted to , she could return to Thailand at any time ,and as for letting her stay over with friends , for me that is not a concern, I have no wish to keep her on a short lead , I have much more respect for than you imply ! I never implied that you didn't have respect for her, just that you don't have a backbone, it seems. And if I seem rather venomous about this, it's because of all the stories I've read of guys getting fleeced in LOS and not having any leverage in the situation. But you have all the leverage here. I think it's ironic that this thread is about respect, meaning her respect for you. But perhaps it should really be about the respect you have for yourself. From my vantage point, it's not looking good for you on that account. Nobody respects a doormat. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trembly Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) @wooloomooloo, The second category are probably the most diverse. In here you get both males and females who seek to go abroad mainly to work, work, work, save up, and come back to Thailand to reinvest the money. Some invest it in land or business, some invest it in cards and dice. Each to their own. There are three main ways for a Thai in this category to go abroad : go through an international employment agency, hire a bent Thai who is already legal in the west to justify their immigration (this is big business, the going rate is 500'000 for a pukka working visa into Canada, I've recently discovered), or to get in via a marriage visa . . . And immediately, without any shred of evidence, you've applied this paragraph to the OP's situation. How kind and, notwithstanding, disinterested in your Thai status as it's of no relevance to this thread. You're not as worldly as you suggest.I didn't, you did. You applied my first post on this thread, a general statement (as it can only general as I don't know the details of the OP's situation) which may or may not be relevant to the OP (only he knows), to the OP's situation . . . clearly because you know all the details of the situation. You can't just be assuming, surely. Edited February 24, 2013 by Trembly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diddums Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 I knew of a guy with a girl.....she was working in a sandwich shop. She brought home more cash each day than he in a week. He was a bit thick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozziebloke Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 rijb, thank you for your imput , I do take on board what you say , and am far from perfect in my ways , but respect for one another is the foundation of a harmonious life together , I just feel , my lady has been inconsiderate , and I perhaps have approached it in the only way I know , we got a problem , lets sort it out ! It would appear that I have a lot to learn about cross cultural relationships ! hindsight is a wonderful thing ! How about you just go round to where she works and make an appointment to chat with her during her lunch break or when she finishes work go to where she is living or if she doesn't need you know where she is living meet her somewhere else and have a subtle chat about your future together. There need not be any dramatics just a conversation and at least then you are guarranteed an answer to some or all of your thoughts/worries/apprehentions? just a thought 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricardo Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 There is something else you need to consider, why have her friends not enouraged her to contact you and make an attempt to patch things up, especially if they know she really loves you but has been hurt by your reaction, in an ideal situation mutual friends would be at least encouraging communication in an attempt to heal the rift.....so what do they know that you do not? Perhaps the OP should try to pass the word, via one of her more-settled happily-married female friends, that he's sorry he over-reacted, but would like her to get in-touch please ? And Good Luck ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Semper Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Budhist virus , It has happened on numerous occasions , and I feel since she started work there , I am way down the list in her priorities , Since she left , I have rung her mobile , sent her txts and messaged her on f/book , all to no avail , It might be that I have well and truly f***ed up ! Hate to say this, but i think you're right. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meom Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 I knew of a guy with a girl.....she was working in a sandwich shop. She brought home more cash each day than he in a week. He was a bit thick. Did she share the cash with him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wooloomooloo Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Happens to be true according to my experience.Really, Trembly. You've mixed with so many dodgy fellow Thais that you've been conditioned to it. In my opinion the bad 'uns are the absolute minority, but you appear to have sought them out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trembly Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) Happens to be true according to my experience.Really, Trembly. You've mixed with so many dodgy fellow Thais that you've been conditioned to it. In my opinion the bad 'uns are the absolute minority, but you appear to have sought them out.Either that or I've forgotten more meaningful conversations with Thais who've been abroad than you've ever had or probably will have. That is of course, assuming that you don't already know everything about everyone. Edited February 24, 2013 by Trembly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancealot Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Tommo , your such a bundle of fun , not ! Let me cheer you up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wooloomooloo Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Either that or I've forgotten more meaningful conversations with Thais who've been abroad than you've ever had or probably will have.Exactly, Trembly. You mix with the minority of Thais looking for an easy life of riches and leisure by dishonest means. Bear in mind, that all these friends of yours have applied for visas under false pretenses by your own admission. Not my experience, at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post aTomsLife Posted February 24, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted February 24, 2013 Budhist virus , It has happened on numerous occasions , and I feel since she started work there , I am way down the list in her priorities , Since she left , I have rung her mobile , sent her txts and messaged her on f/book , all to no avail , It might be that I have well and truly f***ed up ! Hate to say this, but i think you're right. No, she f***ed up! You really do come off as a glutton for punishment. Have you sent the text Tommo advised you to send? There's no reason not to, and it could very well lead to the two of you making amends, assuming she has a shred of common sense. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommoPhysicist Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) Happens to be true according to my experience.Really, Trembly. You've mixed with so many dodgy fellow Thais that you've been conditioned to it. In my opinion the bad 'uns are the absolute minority, but you appear to have sought them out. In my opinion, your opinion is mistaken. Edited February 24, 2013 by TommoPhysicist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommoPhysicist Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 (edited) I knew of a guy with a girl.....she was working in a sandwich shop. She brought home more cash each day than he in a week. He was a bit thick. Did she share the cash with him? or bring him back a nice thick sandwich? Edited February 24, 2013 by TommoPhysicist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Whatever visa she may be on, a very large proportion of the Thais I've met who have been abroad actually know very little about the various visas and how they work, and care even less. That's slightly insulting to Thai's, particularly Thai ladies, Trembly. The ladies I know in the UK are well aware of the requirements and do care about their immigration status and relationships with their husbands. But you do understand that there are other people who know other Thai ladies where the reverse is true ? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancealot Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Budhist virus , It has happened on numerous occasions , and I feel since she started work there , I am way down the list in her priorities , Since she left , I have rung her mobile , sent her txts and messaged her on f/book , all to no avail , It might be that I have well and truly f***ed up ! Hate to say this, but i think you're right. No, she f***ed up! You really do come off as a glutton for punishment. Have you sent the text Tommo advised you to send? There's no reason not to, and it could very well lead to the two of you making amends, assuming she has a shred of common sense. Very important to speak out: It is her bad! and not his.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Rene 123 , She worked for 20 years in the same job in Bangkok, and she actually paid for the construction of `our` house in her village at a cost of 2 million baht, As for her staying with friends overnight occasionally , they are all female , and yes , I have met most of them , some with `falang` husbands , its just a `Thai thing` ladies meet , eat ang gossip , for me its no big deal , I trust her implicitly ! Thai ladies will ALWAYS cover one another. Spot on THAIS will always cover one another........... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wooloomooloo Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 But you do understand that there are other people who know other Thai ladies where the reverse is true ?Have you read the entire thread, cardholder? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrtoad Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Either that or I've forgotten more meaningful conversations with Thais who've been abroad than you've ever had or probably will have.Exactly, Trembly. You mix with the minority of Thais looking for an easy life of riches and leisure by dishonest means. Bear in mind, that all these friends of yours have applied for visas under false pretenses by your own admission. Not my experience, at all. Can you get back on topic as opposed to having a go at Trembly and taking what he has said out of total context. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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