You stay Thailand long time= strike out

Farang roo mak= strike out

You teacher English=strike out

Not a phrase but funny incident

My neighbor, a lovely elderly lady knows i have 1 car and 2 bikes, but i bought another car and another bike.

So she sees me in the morning and says "this car you? and bike you? pointing at my "fleet" , i say yes it is.

She smiles and says "why you not give me one"

handsum man = you're a punter paying for sex, i find you pathetic and have zero respect for you.

LOL, like it really matters what a working girl thinks of you.

I'm sure it doesnt. I imagine that sentiment wouldn't just be a bargirls tho, I would think non "working" girls would have much the same thoughts. Likely even more so! But this thread isn't about that tho, its about the funny stuff that hookers feed their punters.

I don't like Thai man = I will take your money and go to the karaoke bar tonight and pay a Thai boy to screw me.

Loom = Small (and often filthy) room where she sleeps.

Up to you = You are one second away from getting hit in the head with a bottle.

Up to me = You are one second away from getting hit in the head with a bottle / Whatever you say goes in one ear and out the other.

My sister = Some girl she sort of knows from her village.

Jep! = I'm too lazy for a proper shag so I'm going to pretend it hurts so you stop poking me and jerk yourself off.

Lets go Insomnia = I want you to get so drunk that it is impossible for you to have sex with me, but you still have to pay me for the night AND buy drinks for me and all my friends.

Epic thread guys. Please keep it going!

Acyclovir (noun) drug in tablet or cream form used for the treatment of herpes.

Usage: Not mine! I buy for my friend. She go back home Udon already.

Period (colloquialism) common name used to describe female menstruation. The likelihood that a girl is currently having her period is inversely proportional to the apparent wealth and looks of the man that approaches her.

Usage: I have my period.

as the signature says.....

I not know, but I know you know= I have heard it said and really am at a loss as she never meant he knew!

You stay Thailand long time= strike out

Farang roo mak= strike out

You teacher English=strike out

here is the more common variant:

you dtao = (turtle) impossible to scam money out of you, I tried!

Another story that happened to me at a Kasikorn branch:

The lady is sad, her colleague tells me "she just finit boyfriend".

Sad one takes my bank book, looks at it and says "you narak maa". We do the business (bank business that is), she tells me twice she finished boyfriend and we part on "when do you call me darling", 555.

Nothing to do with the numbers in my bank book of course, LOL.

Period (colloquialism) common name used to describe female menstruation. The likelihood that a girl is currently having her period is inversely proportional to the apparent wealth and looks of the man that approaches her.

Usage: I have my period.

Sorry but wrong spelling

Its peLioT

"I will love you to the sky"= once your plane is in the sky its over

Period (colloquialism) common name used to describe female menstruation. The likelihood that a girl is currently having her period is inversely proportional to the apparent wealth and looks of the man that approaches her.

Usage: I have my period.

At the prices they charge in gogo bars I would say that the ladies there will not be menstruating for a minute longer than they have to.