Extortion....or scam...same same as = loss of money.

[indelible14u]

hi,

i am new to posting on this forum but have been reading posts and info on this great site for many years.

i would like to share my story and i hope i have some honest feedback.

i will say i feel that i have been victim of a scam but will let you decide.

i have known my fiance for nearly 3 yrs.

i have travelled to thailand and spent a total of 6 months together with her ( approx 5 weeks every 6 months ) mainly on vacation as she works 16 hours + per day every day as well as doing housework in her aunties homefront shop/supermarket when i am not there.i then pay for an employee to help at the shop when she is away although her uncle helps there too.

she doesnt get paid just a room and a room for her 5 yr old daughter.

when i visit i buy them all they need and also for 2+ years sent 5,000 bht per month and leave 25,000 bht everytime i go back home which equates to 10,000 bht per month.

last december she became pregnant and our baby girl will be born mid-august.

i have been what i feel as kind and generous in that i have made her feel loved by spending over 250,000 baht on jewelery and engagement ring.

i have arranged for visa which is currently being processed so they can come and live with me in australia.

she has been a good lady to me and has a good work ethic and use to work as a nurse in the udon thani hospital.

she married a thai man 6 yrs ago but he had a mistress and left her before their baby girl who is now 5+ yrs old was born.

her mother passed away when she was young and her father ran away from isaan to work in bangkok due to some financial problems.

her aunty views farangs as all rich and people from whom to become wealthy from them and their money.

there is a gambling house in front of their house/shop which is packed everyday with thai ladies married to farangs who work o/s

these ladies all drive new cars and have homes all purchased by their old farang husbands.

they gamble and drink daily and many have thai lovers who also do the same and seem to be unemployed.

she has for years been complaining to my fiance about how these bar girls etc.have new houses and cars yet she doesnt and hasnt got which is very upsetting to her.

i always bring expensive gifts for them when i visit from o/s and take them out to meals at good hotels etc etc.

i treat her daughter like she was my own and she has all she needs like 46" lcd tv,toys,bikes,pink room,dvd,consoles,games,clothes,karaoke,good school,art school,karate new aircond in her room,new furniture,i pay for all her foods and mi,health insurance and some other insurances for when she is older etc etc. and my love and care.

i treat my fiance the same with phones,tablet,our vacations spent in nice hotels around thailand,always eat in quality resturantes,buy her clothes,hairstyles,braces for teeth,

paid for her ipad,and all lifes comforts she has them as well as also love and care.i ring her everyday without fail and she emails me also daily and we chat at times on cam if we are not tired.my mother and young son have not met her but will do in january and they talkon the phone and online on cam.

i found her long lost father for her which made her very happy and took her,him and her younger brother for 1 week vacation to hua hin...all so she is happy which she is.it was a warm and lovely reuniting time.the raw emotion that poured out after not having seen each other for about 15 years brought tears all around.we had a great time.

since the news of our baby i have had big porfessional extension built onto the aunties house with ensuite,furniture etc etc which will only be used until the visa is approved.

all the babies needs are all in place.i am happy to spend and give as i love her very much and i feel she loves me too.it is a genuine relationship based on love and respect.

to the business i stock it with goods on occasions and have paid for a huge roof to cover all the shop/patio/car parking area again for comfort for them all.

since we have been together the aunty has not had to pay 1 satang towards my fiance and her daughter who lovingly calls me dad.

since her pregnancy i have paid all doctors bills and expenses and already paid the 40,000 baht for a private room for the birth and for a good doctor to deliver the baby.

she tells me and has told me there is no love in the home for them...all is about money.all is about material things like what others have from farangs and what she hasnt.

please understand i am not trying to big note myself that i give,give,give and spend,spend ,spend on them as i do it from my heart and as my way to show i love them.

when i arrive in thailand i fly her into bangkok and we meet at the airport everytime and i leave thailand the day i leave her.

there are no other men or woman involved and we are honest and faithful to each other and all is going along very well and we are very happy and excited about our future.

although the aunty would love a big new house and a brand new car from me...she just isnt going to get these desires or dreams as i am not a millionaire.

besides she has several houses and farms and works high up in a big hotel so she is well off financially and her husband has just retired and once worked o/s for many years

since the pregnancy i send now 10,000 plus the money i leave equates to 15,000 per month which i feel is enough to live comfortably.

now comes my question.....

but 1st...i need to say...1 month ago i was told her aunty is buying a new car so our baby can go home in it from the hospital.

i told my fiance that this wasnt needed,they already had a good 4x4 only a few years old anyway the hospital is only a few km away.

if she wanted a new car that was not my business but i didnt want to hear talk of..so that baby can be picked up from the hospital in a new car.

it worried me to hear this as it sounded a little absurd.

i said i didnt want to hear our babies name linked to the purchase of a new car as i could feel what it may lead to.

i booked my flight last sunday and emailed her the itinerary.

the next day aunty took delivery of a 600,000 + bht new car,

by some stroke of bad luck that afternoon my fiances ex husband ( married but no papers ) supposedly turned up and demanded 200,000 baht or he would come and harrass her daughter.they had 2 days to pay him.

when i rang her i could tell something was not right.

when i was told he had arrived when he has never ever seen the little girl and left there lives nearly 6 yrs ago i was shocked.

when i was told the ransom money was needed to be paid i was in true shock.

i said,go to the police station ( also they have a relative who is a policeman ).

i said you must report it.

you cant pay as he may come back next month and want more.

i was told thai police arent like police in farangland...i know that in many cases there is corruption,scams,set ups etc, but to protect a little girl from kidnap is a different matter

i said the poilce would probably send an undercover officer to be at the shop and witness the extortion and arrest him straight away as it is a very serious offence especially involving respectable citizens and a little 5 yr old girl.

it then became a bit of an arguement between us.my fiance has since gone to relatives and i am told borrowed the 200,000 bht and paid him.

our baby is due on the 11th august,i am due there soon,i had just booked my ticket,the aunty just paid for the new car.

she didnt get a new house like all the others she compares my fiance with and calls her a failure but she did get 2 room extensions,huge roofing,a new kitchen and not a bht to spend on her niece or granddaughter in nearly 3 yrs.she also adopted the litle girl and has the legal papers since the father left before she was born so shes a guardian.

she didnt get a new car but unfortunately i think she got 33% of her new car as now since my fiance has borrowed the money to pay and i am the one who supports her one doesnt have to be a brain surgeon to work out...i will be paying for the loan and if it is all true which i somehow doubt he can come back next month and demand more.

surely if it was all true they would of gone to police.....my fiance is still a mess and is still in fear but seems to think the problem is fixed ...well hopeful anyway.

thank you for your time and please leave your opinion.

regardless if i have been scammed or not...surely one would of needed to involve the police at a high level for the safety of the child and so that this man doesnt come back next month and demand...maybe more...500,000 bht since he was paid what he demanded this time.

my last point..surely the police in a case like this would help or has thailand got that bad like many people are saying in forums etc about scams,setups,extortion etc by police

[zeichen]

got half way. Sorry are you writing memoirs? I dont' really know what you are after.

About police they are right, they won't get involved over domestic issues until a crime has actually been committed. I know it is stupid but that is the way it is.

As for a scam, sounds like greedy relatives. Personally, if you think that 15k baht a month is enough for your baby mama to live, just stay in your country and move on. Abandon your child and get over it. You may not be rich but that is really a lowball sum to support your family.

I don't know why you would ever get involved with a woman with this kind of background. You made your bed lie in it. If it is a scam then it is a scam. Pay up or be alone. Simple answer.

[falkan]

i don't know what kind of magic these girls put on peoples head, but don't you have any brain at all?

everytime i read about this it give me a big smile

[balo]

You have already given them too much money, thats the problem with foreigners getting involved in a relationship and their relatives. while you still live in your home country . You have no control of whats happening while you are not there to see it for yourself .

Now you probably need to talk to a good lawyer in Thailand and find ways to save your family .

[Jerry Cornelius]

i don't know what kind of magic these girls put on peoples head, but don't you have any brain at all?

everytime i read about this it give me a big smile

Let's see.

Male and female (possibly younger). What's the attraction?

Who's getting what (exactly) from the relationship?

Why gloat?

Jerry

[I Like Thai]

If you have applied for a Visa for your Gfs Daughter to go to Australia, then the childs father would have been informed, as his permission is required before she can leave the country

.

He may be aggrieved by this situation.

He has probably asked for compensation in order to allow the visa to go forward.

Best for you to stay out of this completely and let your GF handle it. If his price is 200,000. Then pay it, end of story. You don't want to end up in a situation where either your GF is unable to go to Australia, or is unhappy there because she may be seperated from her daughter.

Forget about trying ti involve the Police. This is a family matter.

Edited August 2, 2013 by I Like Thai

[kurnell]

Just wondering why they aren't in Australia already?

[Bender]

Honestly, i don't want to be crude, but it's actually people like you (and the old fart farang)

who make to "us" nearly impossible to have a healthy relationship in thailand.

After no wonder why the whole population see caucasian like tras...

You just throw throw throw the money... wake up this not true love.

ps: dont want to be more rude, but are you even sure it's your baby. As i have witnessed the same case than yours before.

Edited August 3, 2013 by Bender

[ava15]

Thats a lot of money to have thrown at a family that youve only spent 6 months with over three years.

[Spoonman]

wow, what a train wreck.

Your engaged to and empregnated another mans wife, how did you think it was going to work out ?

[theblether]

From what you write....

It's clear that the Aunty regards you as a bank.

It's clear that the Aunty has this attitude because women married to ATM's gather in her shop every day.

It's also clear that your fiance is incapable of standing up to her.

So here's what you do.

Dump the fiance and get on with your life.

The end.

[BookMan]

Maybe you need to learn to say 'no' and give your reasons why. You seem to have been increasing the level of money and gifts you give, therefore increasing expectations Throwing money at a partner to fix a problem only leads to increased expectations...and more money throwing...it never works.

Outside pressure is one of the biggest problems in a relationship. Friends and family telling the girl what she should expect and what she should have and why doesn't she have this or that and that her farang husband/BF is rich. Moving her away from the Auntie would also help.

The car purchase and the alleged blackmail form the ex husband sounds like scam to get your money, a scam you seem to be getting sucked in by

[simple1]

OP: Taking your post on face value, discussed with my Thai wife & she said you're being fed a bunch of lies.

If you can accept all the BS & still wish to sponsor your fiance, her child & your joint child you will either have to establish the Thai man abandoned your GF & child with documentation from the Amphur or arrange for his signed acceptance for the Thai child to depart Thailand, that for sure will cost you more money. Depending on the age of the Thai child, will be interviewed to establish what's in the best interest for the child, as well as to determine his/her relationship with the Thai father; that may turn out to be a surprise for you.

Best of luck...

[inzman]

Wow! This a classic con! Man-up, run don't walk, run fast. I doubt the baby is even yours.

[kevvy]

sorry for you , but we all on T.V have heard stories like this and if you have been reading this site for years then why ask us now .? you would have known all about the ways of some Thai girls and their desire for money , and to have a farang husband.

to me it does not make sense about the part you have been reading this forum for years , and now you are posting something you would have read many times before .

[zoza]

your story reminds me some of the problems I've had but managed to evade in the last ten years, but there are two big differences between my situation and yours.

1. I live mostly with my wife in Thailand.

2. I do not have a child with my wife.

the first advice I would give to any farang getting involved with a thai lady is you have to be strong

when I started getting the "what she gets/has" I replied if your not happy go,and tell your family +

friends that I don't want to listen to gossip about what people spend/have. I know several proper millionair's and they are not happy not content, in fact most are still driven by a desire that impedes

their happiness.

I also had the ex-husband thing phoning demanding money(she was still married) so it was not

straight forward as this can be a problem in Thailand,i told my lady if this fella thought he was

gonna get one satang from me=her he would be waiting a loooong time.

my girlfiend went to solicitors and payed around 7/8k bht for a thai decree nisi as he had abandoned

his wife and children and never helped them in any way for 8 years or more there was not a lot of sympathy for him in either the thai justice system or from her extended family of about 100+.

so it went away very quickly and quietly.

you talk very good about your fiancée, and there are some great girls in Thailand, but you have

to be careful of family because they can have a lot of influence, I find time is a great tool in thailand

I told my girlfriend we might marry after 3 years together (36 months living together)

and when I did just that it made her trust+believe in me, but I needed that time to really get to know

her and her me.

if your lady has lost/given 200k its not the end of the world, but you need to explain to her it has to

be the end of this matter. if there's one major problem with a lot of thai ladies its them and money

you need to be in charge 24/7 best of luck.

[chrisinth]

OP, if this truly is your situation, then I can only feel very sorry for you.

But, the part of the post I cannot get my head round is this line:

"she also adopted the litle girl and has the legal papers since the father left before she was born so shes a guardian"

If this is the case, what exactly is/was the ex husband (whether legal or not) asking for money wise? I hope I have read this right, that it refers to your fiancée's daughter. This is the bit I can't understand!

You need to get the story straight for yourself before moving on. Here is a little hint, begins with A, is four letters long and ends in t. She has been in every point of contention throughout the OP. This is a family matter, not police.

Good luck..............

[NeverSure]

[pigeonjake]

prime example, of when you start giving money it never stops,

you have to state at the start that it isnt your job to keep the whole family,

its your job to take care of your wife and children if you have them,

i told my wife right at the start, its your papas job to take care of his family and mine to take care of you,

jake

[transam]

OP, after years of reading stuff here you are just another casualty, many before you and many more to come. Your case in no way is unique, in fact it is quite common. Problem is we are blinded by a lovely lady who is totally different to ladies in your homeland and you/we feel a bit sorry for them if they seem to have poor life. There is much to learn about the ''family'' and the control they have over folk, I know, dealt with it, but they now know my stance. BIG learning curve and the worse thing anyone can do is splash money around.

[Payboy]

This story can only be complete with all the bells and whistles if the aunty turns out to be a ladyboy.

[h90]

got half way. Sorry are you writing memoirs? I dont' really know what you are after.

About police they are right, they won't get involved over domestic issues until a crime has actually been committed. I know it is stupid but that is the way it is.

As for a scam, sounds like greedy relatives. Personally, if you think that 15k baht a month is enough for your baby mama to live, just stay in your country and move on. Abandon your child and get over it. You may not be rich but that is really a lowball sum to support your family.

I don't know why you would ever get involved with a woman with this kind of background. You made your bed lie in it. If it is a scam then it is a scam. Pay up or be alone. Simple answer.

here the police is always helpful, even for the most stupid neighbor disputes. Mostly inviting the parties and negotiate....

[h90]

Working 16 hours a day + doing housework without salary.

No way....

Our last cleaning woman got 10.000.

Very easy to find a job for 6-8.000 Baht in Bangkok. Place for living is 800-1500 Baht.

I think there are many things wrong in that story.

[krisb]

So your waiting for her visa right? Then her 1st daughter and your daughter will be moving to Australia right?

I'd say once approved get them away from that greedy family of hers. Why you felt the need to build an extension on her aunts is silly. Perhaps an air con but not everything else. They are Thai, they're used to hot weather. I'd wait for the visa then say stick all those car bills and extortion money up your bum I'm not paying anymore.

Another thing, is she officially divorced? No visa if not official from the courts. Then how's it gonna work with the new baby, like passport etc? Mate sounds messy, sort it out for God's sake.

[geriatrickid]

A very interesting and entertaining tale.

Allow me to tell you how the story ends: You get married and if you do not suffer an unfortunate fatal accident or survive, will lose much of your savings such that you don't have a pot to piss in, She will leave you and you will sustain a broken heart that renders you bitter and unable to trust women. Over time, you eventually find a room to stay in Pattaya and commiserate with the other elderly retirees down at the local beer bar.

[BookMan]

A very interesting and entertaining tale.

Allow me to tell you how the story ends: You get married and if you do not suffer an unfortunate fatal accident or survive, will lose much of your savings such that you don't have a pot to piss in, She will leave you and you will sustain a broken heart that renders you bitter and unable to trust women. Over time, you eventually find a room to stay in Pattaya and commiserate with the other elderly retirees down at the local beer bar.

This one is different...

[bkkmick]

A very interesting and entertaining tale.

Allow me to tell you how the story ends: You get married and if you do not suffer an unfortunate fatal accident or survive, will lose much of your savings such that you  don't have  a pot to piss in, She will leave you and you will sustain a broken heart that renders  you bitter and unable to trust women. Over time, you eventually find a room to stay in Pattaya and commiserate with the other elderly retirees down at the local beer bar.

 

Then you will adopt a name like geriatrickid2

[Issangeorge]

Okay, three points; 1 the girl did not seem to be married legally to her husband (married, but no papers) therefore I don't believe he has any legal rights at all, even to his daughter. 2 at no point in the post did I see a mention of the poster's age, so don't assume he's old. 3 poster don't assume your fiancé is broken up with her husband or that the baby is yours.

Sent from my i-mobile IQ 6 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[humbug]

dont pay the 200,000 baht its a bamboozle story to help pay towards the new car

they picked a heart wrenching story that uou will never be able to unprove unless you hired a private detective without their knowlege

i am sorry it sounds a negative response but just reading uour original post that is what screams out to me

you are being too kind and fair in your thinking just tell them outright stop lying you are not paying and dont listen to any story telling on the subject with so called family backing the story up

[h90]

A very interesting and entertaining tale.

Allow me to tell you how the story ends: You get married and if you do not suffer an unfortunate fatal accident or survive, will lose much of your savings such that you don't have a pot to piss in, She will leave you and you will sustain a broken heart that renders you bitter and unable to trust women. Over time, you eventually find a room to stay in Pattaya and commiserate with the other elderly retirees down at the local beer bar.

This one is different...

yes where is the sick Buffalo and the sick mother in the hospital who get only operate after payment.

without these parts the farang-thai Thai Visa love story isn't complete.