Seems like there are a large number of thai single mums around

[snake24]

I personally know of a few men from my country that married thai ladies and get this that already had kids with someone else.

Now what is even more odd is that these 2 guys are friends, work in the same industry both from the same country both of them married thai ladies and both thai ladies now know one another and both these ladies have a child with some thai guy that they either were married to in the past or probably out of wedlock i mean what are the chances of that happening? One of the guys had the son of his thai wife attend his wedding and shook his hand cos i think the son is around 6 or 7 yrs old and she now has a new baby with her new husband. Oh yes one of the ladies used to work in some japanese karaoke on silom and do a bit of the night trade turning tricks.

I know of another thai lady who got knocked up by some thai guy and he ran away she has a daughter that studies in australia i think, she was to marry this farang guy who then ended up marrying her ex best friend so they aren't best friends anymore. Now she's hooked up with a new thai guy and i think getting married not sure cos she stopped contacting me and i even had her new bf msg me on whatsapp **profanities removed**

Anyway it's quite shocking to think that there is perhaps a large segment of the population that didn't grow up in a nuclear family and probably didn't have both parents around to raise them and i suppose the concept of marriage with 1 partner is actually a western christian type of concept because in the olden days of thailand men could legally marry a few wives. Not very sure about that but i do think it should be the natural order of things in most families the world over to have a man and a woman rear a child but i suppose ppl that actually grew up in such a family are in the minority. Getting ahead of myself here cos i just want the discussion to be focused on thai single mums and they seem to constitute a large portion of thai families with children.

Edited September 9, 2013 by cdnvic
profanities removed

[ukrules]

Anyway it's quite shocking to think that there is perhaps a large segment of the population that didn't grow up in a nuclear family

Have you ever been to Thailand ?

[Forethat]

Marrying someone even though you have a child from a previous relationship? What's the issue?

With the above in mind, considering the number of Thai women who are married to western men with children from previous relationships "at home" one would think this is a recipe for an interesting debate. And then there's the number of young Thai women (without children) who has moved to Europe and USA to marry a man with children from one or more previous marriages.

In UK, 26% of households with children are single parent households.

http://www.gingerbread.org.uk/content/365/Statistics

I guess I'm old fashioned, but I dont understand the issue here.

[wooloomooloo]

I personally know of a few men from my country that married thai ladies and get this that already had kids with someone else.

Absolutely shocking. This would never happen in the UK.

The UK stands as a shining beacon of nuclear families and statistically proven that there are no single parent families in the UK, let alone any single parents that actually know each other. Hallelujah.

[EyesWideOpen]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

[IsaanUSA]

I have two friends that live in England (one Thai, one American), and they both married an English person that already had kids from a previous marriage. They seem to be doing just great in England with their new families.

[grimblegrumble]

Why does the op think many of these are born out of wedlock? Considering most Thai marriages are not done at the Amphur office does that mean they are not married? A wedding party is recognised in Thailand as a marriage. The man and woman have children, he runs off leaving her to raise the children. This happens all the time in Thailand. Hence the amount of women 25+ with children. If this is so shocking to the op, maybe the op needs to see the real world full of single parent families.

If someone wants to be in a relationship with these women that is their perogative.

[snake24]

I personally know of a few men from my country that married thai ladies and get this that already had kids with someone else.

Absolutely shocking. This would never happen in the UK.

The UK stands as a shining beacon of nuclear families and statistically proven that there are no single parent families in the UK, let alone any single parents that actually know each other. Hallelujah.

I realised that coming from a more traditional asian country of course it would sound silly especially to the enlightened westerners who are always ahead of us asians

[snake24]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

[EyesWideOpen]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

The situation here in Thailand is certainly tragic for these children. It may sound

odd, but in some ways there are parallels with the black community in America.

Where there are vast numbers of black children that do not have a father figure

to guide them, and a mother that is part time at best, with the grandmother doing

a lot of the child rearing. The Thai children are probably better off because of

a much more supportive extended family..

On my very first trip to Isan 13 years ago, I went out to visit a bar girl I knew who lived in a small village way outside of Yasothon. We were both there for about three days. Her son, about 5 years old, was in 7th heaven. His mom was there with presents for him, and this strange farang with a giant motorcycle is taking him for rides in front of the other village kids.

And then it time for the two of us to leave........I will never forget that scene....He was sitting at the base of the stairs up to the house surrounded by all the shoes, watching us leave. As we finishing packing and getting ready to roll away, he started screaming and crying his lungs out. And then he was so angry, he started picking up all the shoes and flinging them at us. I was watching with my jaw hanging down, and the bar girl sort of hits me on the shoulder telling me to go quickly... So does this social arrangement affect the kids ??? Yes.....

[snake24]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

The situation here in Thailand is certainly tragic for these children. It may sound

odd, but in some ways there are parallels with the black community in America.

Where there are vast numbers of black children that do not have a father figure

to guide them, and a mother that is part time at best, with the grandmother doing

a lot of the child rearing. The Thai children are probably better off because of

a much more supportive extended family..

On my very first trip to Isan 13 years ago, I went out to visit a bar girl I knew who lived in a small village way outside of Yasothon. We were both there for about three days. Her son, about 5 years old, was in 7th heaven. His mom was there with presents for him, and this strange farang with a giant motorcycle is taking him for rides in front of the other village kids.

And then it time for the two of us to leave........I will never forget that scene....He was sitting at the base of the stairs up to the house surrounded by all the shoes, watching us leave. As we finishing packing and getting ready to roll away, he started screaming and crying his lungs out. And then he was so angry, he started picking up all the shoes and flinging them at us. I was watching with my jaw hanging down, and the bar girl sort of hits me on the shoulder telling me to go quickly... So does this social arrangement affect the kids ??? Yes.....

You know i thought of the black kids in the US and this movie came to mind starring denzel washington as some coach i think a baseball coach and it was during the 60s so ppl were openly racist and this white kid who was a student and not much older or the same age as the black kid he was interviewing was asking him some very offensive questions like do you even know your own father. Aside from the rudeness and offensiveness to look at the situation it seems like being born was a mistake because it seems like you are not really going to get a lot of care and it just goes on and on. It isn't even new. Probably been ongoing since what? Ancient times. Kid comes from some disfunctional, broken family grows up that is if he manages to grow up and then breeds a whole new generation of disfunctional children. Situation isn't even unique to thailand probably occurs in every country in the world and of course in the enlightened, superior western world.

Oh yes your description of the scene where the son is angry cos his mother and some strange man that is rich are going to leave him reminds me of my own childhood not in similarity but how stark the contrast is and i also mentioned this to some thai fren i was visiting but i couldn't say it out in thai but anyway my childhood is rather similar to many of my peers in my country in that we lived with our parents and saw them everyday. My mum and dad were happily married and nope my mum didn't bring home any strange men nor did my dad and it was just me, my siblings, and my parents in my household until today. I saw my mum everyday until i went overseas for university or if i went abroad on holiday and my situation is rather normal amongst ppl of my country or at least with my peers. Now it's totally different with thai children. Where parents would visit their kids say once a month in the provinces and then go back to bangkok for the rest of the month while kids were studying in schools. Kids would grow up and perhaps travel to bkk which is very different from say a western family in the US. Unless the parents were divorced kids stayed in the same house as the parents which is pretty different from the thai way. Let me start a new thread about that soon.

[MrWorldwide]

Anyway it's quite shocking to think that there is perhaps a large segment of the population that didn't grow up in a nuclear family

Have you ever been to Thailand ?

Bingo. I expect the next thread will be something along the lines of 'Gee, Sukhumvit Road is really, really long !' ....

[tuky]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

The situation here in Thailand is certainly tragic for these children. It may sound

odd, but in some ways there are parallels with the black community in America.

Where there are vast numbers of black children that do not have a father figure

to guide them, and a mother that is part time at best, with the grandmother doing

a lot of the child rearing. The Thai children are probably better off because of

a much more supportive extended family..

On my very first trip to Isan 13 years ago, I went out to visit a bar girl I knew who lived in a small village way outside of Yasothon. We were both there for about three days. Her son, about 5 years old, was in 7th heaven. His mom was there with presents for him, and this strange farang with a giant motorcycle is taking him for rides in front of the other village kids.

And then it time for the two of us to leave........I will never forget that scene....He was sitting at the base of the stairs up to the house surrounded by all the shoes, watching us leave. As we finishing packing and getting ready to roll away, he started screaming and crying his lungs out. And then he was so angry, he started picking up all the shoes and flinging them at us. I was watching with my jaw hanging down, and the bar girl sort of hits me on the shoulder telling me to go quickly... So does this social arrangement affect the kids ??? Yes.....

You know i thought of the black kids in the US and this movie came to mind starring denzel washington as some coach i think a baseball coach and it was during the 60s so ppl were openly racist and this white kid who was a student and not much older or the same age as the black kid he was interviewing was asking him some very offensive questions like do you even know your own father. Aside from the rudeness and offensiveness to look at the situation it seems like being born was a mistake because it seems like you are not really going to get a lot of care and it just goes on and on. It isn't even new. Probably been ongoing since what? Ancient times. Kid comes from some disfunctional, broken family grows up that is if he manages to grow up and then breeds a whole new generation of disfunctional children. Situation isn't even unique to thailand probably occurs in every country in the world and of course in the enlightened, superior western world.

Oh yes your description of the scene where the son is angry cos his mother and some strange man that is rich are going to leave him reminds me of my own childhood not in similarity but how stark the contrast is and i also mentioned this to some thai fren i was visiting but i couldn't say it out in thai but anyway my childhood is rather similar to many of my peers in my country in that we lived with our parents and saw them everyday. My mum and dad were happily married and nope my mum didn't bring home any strange men nor did my dad and it was just me, my siblings, and my parents in my household until today. I saw my mum everyday until i went overseas for university or if i went abroad on holiday and my situation is rather normal amongst ppl of my country or at least with my peers. Now it's totally different with thai children. Where parents would visit their kids say once a month in the provinces and then go back to bangkok for the rest of the month while kids were studying in schools. Kids would grow up and perhaps travel to bkk which is very different from say a western family in the US. Unless the parents were divorced kids stayed in the same house as the parents which is pretty different from the thai way. Let me start a new thread about that soon.

What are you 12? Do you still wear nappies to bed?

Edited September 9, 2013 by tuky

[RandomSand]

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into?

Ladyboys and butch dykes... Look around and you will see.

Edited September 9, 2013 by RandomSand

[ignis]

because in the olden days of thailand men could legally marry a few wives

In the olden days ??

I know a few that have 2 or 3 wives, and children will all. some I know very well for 15 years or more.. one got married to wife 2 just 8 years ago.

I get a bit muddled up sometimes because i don't understand, 2 houses down in the Village detached house and 2 girls is 'wife' 3, wife 2 visits at least 1 x month and has 2 kids, wife 1 also visits, more often there 2 sons visits, the youngest son from wife 1, is a Uni in Australia, and come home in summer holidays and stays with his Dad's wife 3 so in this Village, for about 1 month........... wife 3 has 2 other Sisters, 1x married and lives in the USA the other in UK.

Is it not muddling for the kids ? here wife 3, Dad pick them up from school 3x a week, maybe stays 1 hours..

[AlexRRR]

Around half of marriages fail world wide, then there's the defacto relationships then there's the short term relationship, im guessing there is a hugh amount of single parent family's world wide.

If you never noticed it in your country you weren't looking, if your in Australia the sitting government regular attacks welfare cheats and by there accounts a fair chunk are single parent family's.

Someone is sensitive, nothing racist written on this topic.

[benalibina]

Around half of marriages fail world wide, then there's the defacto relationships then there's the short term relationship, im guessing there is a hugh amount of single parent family's world wide.

If you never noticed it in your country you weren't looking, if your in Australia the sitting government regular attacks welfare cheats and by there accounts a fair chunk are single parent family's.

Someone is sensitive, nothing racist written on this topic.

Only a dislike of perceived western supremacy !

[Bluetongue]

Around half of marriages fail world wide, then there's the defacto relationships then there's the short term relationship, im guessing there is a hugh amount of single parent family's world wide.

If you never noticed it in your country you weren't looking, if your in Australia the sitting government regular attacks welfare cheats and by there accounts a fair chunk are single parent family's.

Someone is sensitive, nothing racist written on this topic.

Only a dislike of perceived western supremacy !

Well maybe nothing clearly racist, just ethnic and class labelling. There is a big chip on the OP's shoulder and from his track record, which I haven't studied, only come across in random ways, a healthy dose of misogyny which he feels he can get away with here amongst all the boys. Don't encourage him he might go away

[canman]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

The situation here in Thailand is certainly tragic for these children. It may sound

odd, but in some ways there are parallels with the black community in America.

Where there are vast numbers of black children that do not have a father figure

to guide them, and a mother that is part time at best, with the grandmother doing

a lot of the child rearing. The Thai children are probably better off because of

a much more supportive extended family..

On my very first trip to Isan 13 years ago, I went out to visit a bar girl I knew who lived in a small village way outside of Yasothon. We were both there for about three days. Her son, about 5 years old, was in 7th heaven. His mom was there with presents for him, and this strange farang with a giant motorcycle is taking him for rides in front of the other village kids.

And then it time for the two of us to leave........I will never forget that scene....He was sitting at the base of the stairs up to the house surrounded by all the shoes, watching us leave. As we finishing packing and getting ready to roll away, he started screaming and crying his lungs out. And then he was so angry, he started picking up all the shoes and flinging them at us. I was watching with my jaw hanging down, and the bar girl sort of hits me on the shoulder telling me to go quickly... So does this social arrangement affect the kids ??? Yes.....

Heart breaking scene

[snake24]

Around half of marriages fail world wide, then there's the defacto relationships then there's the short term relationship, im guessing there is a hugh amount of single parent family's world wide.

If you never noticed it in your country you weren't looking, if your in Australia the sitting government regular attacks welfare cheats and by there accounts a fair chunk are single parent family's.

Someone is sensitive, nothing racist written on this topic.

Only a dislike of perceived western supremacy !

Well maybe nothing clearly racist, just ethnic and class labelling. There is a big chip on the OP's shoulder and from his track record, which I haven't studied, only come across in random ways, a healthy dose of misogyny which he feels he can get away with here amongst all the boys. Don't encourage him he might go away

Oh quit making up allegations with your pseudo psychoanalysis.

[MrWorldwide]

For the record, and I believe it will be a short-lived record at that, I agree with bluetongue 100%.

[EyesWideOpen]

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into?

Ladyboys and butch dykes... Look around and you will see.

I have often thought that , and have discussed that before with friends. Psychologists say that a girl

who grows up without a father, never really learns to relate well to men when she grows up, and tends

to have relationship difficulties. The damage done to Thai boys who grow up without a father, and never

learn the traits of being a man, is even more devastating, as clearly seen in the enormous size of the

ladyboy community here.

[Aussieroaming]

Your statement about Thai single mum's sound very condescending tone. I'm waiting for Huckleberry Finn to appear

[mrtoad]

Anyway it's quite shocking to think that there is perhaps a large segment of the population that didn't grow up in a nuclear family

Have you ever been to Thailand ?

Maybe in a previous incarnation.

[wolf5370]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

Now what sort of ppl do these children grow up into? I would fanthom the odds of them becoming outstanding citizens would well..... lets' say the odds are stacked against them. You see there is a significant percentage of children born into such a situation.

Often these kids are brought up by grandparents and stand as good a chance as anyone else from their social level (perhaps better as money is coming in which can't always be said for traditional poor farming households).

One must also remember that the death rate of young males is way out of kilter here - a lot of motorcycle/road deaths (due to drink and idiotic driving usually IMO). This leaves young wives and mothers alone - the traditional solution is to farm kid(s) out to in-laws (usually grandparents older aunts/uncles etc) to give them a chance in starting again. Not all single women are products or the bar scene - and not all kids are illegitimate.

My (Thai) wife was brought up by her Grandparents - because her father was a serving Naval Officer and not around a lot and her mother owned a business (so likewise) and had one under three running around in the tiny junior officer's married quarters. She attended private schools (boarding schools) once old enough - and on to private college, finally going to the UK for tertiary education. True her mother was not single, but she was brought up in similar circumstances regarding not being brought up in the traditional western way with mum and dad. Her younger siblings (came later when dad was port stationed - so statically based) and her elder sister, were all brought up at home.

This was also common in the west (still is) where grandparents take the strain for young couple's future - now of course a lot of the strain goes by way of Nannies and crèches!

[giggles]

broken condoms caused me to generate 2 single mums at least ,i lost contact with them so i cant follow up .i did offer to support them but their phone number ceased operation.

in the days before HIV few farangs were wearing a rubber thingy so there must have been more single mums banged up at that time

[Berkshire]

Just one point that leaves all moralizing aside--if not for single moms in Thailand, there would be no farang bar industry.

[swissie]

Not sure about the overall percentages in Thailand, but I would guess that somewhere around

60 % of the girls that work in the sex trade have children they are supporting. My brother,

who has a bit of a savage wit, refers to these children as " farm mistakes"..... Meaning when

the girl was 16 or 17, and could not really resist, the Thai farm boy down the lane slipped it in

without a condom. Girl now becomes pregnant, and the farm boy is long gone. So the true

tragedy of these kids is that they grow up without a father, and a mother who shows up now

and then with presents, before jumping on a bus and heading back to the bar.....

So for the farangs who enter into relationships with these girls, it can go one of two ways.

Either the guy is happy with his new instant family, or he blows the girl off telling her he

has no intention of spending all his time and money raising the child of a Thai man.......

This is the post that says it all. All posts below are unnecessary.

An unwed mother at the age 22 with already 2 children is considered by Thai-Males as a used car at best. (And this the friendliest description I can think of, I could apply much harsher descriptions, if I was to apply Thai-Male classifications.)

End of the line: Young Thai-Mother ends up in Tourist-Hub. Having been told, that old Farangs don't care much about the "used car syndrome" in stark contrast to the Thai-Male-Population.

Jackpot if Farang already declares before marriage, that he will do his utmost to enable the offspring of the farm-boy a "better future in Thailand". The "offspring" of the Farang, left behind in Europe, does not seem to matter much anymore.

At some point, actions of Farangs in Thailand are simply beyond any analysis and comprehension.

Cheers.

[cdnvic]

I've had to delete over 50% of the thread because grown men can't talk to each other like sensible adults. This is the last warning to stop the childish name calling and pointless bickering.

[sbk]

I am not sure how to consider this thread. Perhaps the OP is unaware that more than half of the children born to women under 30 in the US are born out of wedlock. And the notion of the OP that there is a nuclear family in Thailand (um no). The whole thing just makes me really unsure as to his intention here or if he is just simply unaware.