What would you do?

[norrona]

at the moment this man has choices but not for much longer.....

it's not nice and certainly you'd want to try and avoid the situation as much as possible but what's wrong with holding your hands up, saying had a great time and then going back to country of birth and just being normal...get somewhere to stay, a job(they are out there) and rebuild your life....

from my experience the mere thought of the above is what makes once nice people into thieving robbing cheating bastards.....but I can put it more simple than that.

Lazy&Selfish

[Jeffrey346]

The logical thing to do is sell whatever you can to remain afloat until the pension kicks in.

I also read he is in a failing relationship. What if his wife refuses to sell her big face house?

I assume it's in her name and not his business name.

[MobileContent]

This advice does not apply to the unfortunate person who finds themselves in this situation, I have seen it countless times since I have been associated with Thaialnd, which is thirty years now.

Advice, to anyone setting up a business or looking at acquiring assets. Get it right from the start!! Do not put assets in the name of girfriend or wife. Set up a a company with A shares and B shares. The Thai owns the A shares and the Farang owns the B shares. The B shares have nearly all the voting rights and dividend rights. The A shares have nothing, but on paper own the majority stake in the business thereby making the structure legally compliant. Simples as the Meerkats would say!! For those farangs owning property, put it in the name of a company too. Also write yourself a lease to yourself from the company for a term of 30yrs+30 yrs+30 yrs. And Register it with the land dept. This gives an extra layer of protection. All perfecitly legal.

Beauty is skin deep, your assets have to be protected to last (both) of you a lifetime. Get it right from the beginning and avoid the porblems later down the line!!!!

Who reallycares about some property in Nakon Nowhere which you can't turn to cash. If the OP or someone else has a house lease but got the nasty family members next to him or in the same village do you think anyone gives a damn about some A or B shares that are anywhere on farmland? He might be happy to leave the place any way.

I don't need A or B shares but have a house in Isaan in my wife's name and I own a condo in Bangkok under my name. OP should have first started in buying a condo in his name and see how things goes before he started building a house in someone name then you don't need all those rubbish with A and B shares.

Edited November 7, 2013 by MobileContent

[Travel2003]

Never burn your bridges with your country of birth.

Never buy property in Thailand when renting is usually a much cheaper option.

Never put your life savings into any Thai business.

Never continue to fund a failing Thai business.

Never put your health in last place on the important list.

Never believe that your li'l Thai darling will always be YOUR li'l Thai darling.

Never disregard your common sense instincts.

....and most importantly, when the <deleted> hits the fan....

Never try to end your life by jumping off a tall building.

Sound advice

Find a new life in a new country !

Why leave the country?

[Travel2003]

Here is your answer ...I would do this also.

* sigh * ...

Before anyone else wastes their time looking that that link.

The opening lines are ...

"A man from Las Vegas in the US has decided to sell off one his testicles so he can earn almost $37,000.

Mark Parisi is a self-confessed "cheap skate" who regularly earns extra dollars by renting out his body to scientists for medical testing.

He says the scheme has saved him nearly $160,000 over two years and he is currently involved in an Ebola virus trial that pays $5,245 a week."

Thnx for heads up, I kind though it was something silly like that.

Guessing Showbags is also cheap-skate.

By the way, is it a requirement to live in ones home country if one receive social welfare/unemployment money?

[Showbags]

Here is your answer ...I would do this also.

* sigh * ...

Before anyone else wastes their time looking that that link.

The opening lines are ...

"A man from Las Vegas in the US has decided to sell off one his testicles so he can earn almost $37,000.

Mark Parisi is a self-confessed "cheap skate" who regularly earns extra dollars by renting out his body to scientists for medical testing.

He says the scheme has saved him nearly $160,000 over two years and he is currently involved in an Ebola virus trial that pays $5,245 a week."

Thnx for heads up, I kind though it was something silly like that.

Guessing Showbags is also cheap-skate.

By the way, is it a requirement to live in ones home country if one receive social welfare/unemployment money?

It is a viable option if you are in such a position.

I would do it, you only need one and to be honest, at 60 + you may not need either.

I do not know though why they would pay so much for one, never heard of testicle transplants...maybe they use it for noses.

[advancebooking]

I wouldn't have bought a home for someone else (outright).

My mrs has a 25 year home loan, if we part not my problem.

The first rule for people who only have savings, don't spend the savings on something foolish.

(Like a house and business for someone else)

It can't happen to everyone, only someone fairly foolish.

His options, go home or go Pattaya balcony.

FiftyTwo you are a bad person and dont have a good heart. Maybe things will turn out for the worse for you later in life with your bad karma....

[FiftyTwo]

I wouldn't have bought a home for someone else (outright).

My mrs has a 25 year home loan, if we part not my problem.

The first rule for people who only have savings, don't spend the savings on something foolish.

(Like a house and business for someone else)

It can't happen to everyone, only someone fairly foolish.

His options, go home or go Pattaya balcony.

FiftyTwo you are a bad person and dont have a good heart. Maybe things will turn out for the worse for you later in life with your bad karma....

Nothing like a bit of hooker talk to big up your cred.

[kingstonkid]

Question for your friend

Where does he live. You say people in his village cannot afford it.

Are there any other expats around.

I assume that the wife does not want to sell or does she.

If she is willing and this will get them back to a semi solid level then I would put out feelers for the sale on here.

You never know there may be someone on here looking to move to that area. Will they get their money back not likely but they will be able to start over.

The other question I have for you is what are you doing to help this person? I would hope that if I was ever in this dire a consequence and there but for the grace of god that i would have [people willing to help me get back on my feet.

This does not just happen to people in Thailand but is happening all over the world.

[HardenedSoul]

Never burn your bridges with your country of birth.

Damn straight!

I keep some obligations back in London to help maintain perspective. and though I'm still besotted with Thailand after nearly 6 years, it's an alternate reality that requires a tether to more sober foundations if one needs to find one's way out one day.

[phitsanulokjohn]

Sad story.Never put all your eggs in one basket,this gives options should the s**t hit the fan.Poor guy,he has my sympathies,as you said could happen to anyone.There but for the grace of God.

[intravox]

If he's married and divorces the Thai partner, he can legally claim half of all the estate

[fittobethaied]

I lived in the Philippines for 11 years and ran my own multi-million dollar real estate operation selling US properties to foreign investors around SE Asia. I married a Filipina hiso type and was living the lifestyle of the rich and famous until 1988 when I sold $70 million worth of real estate and got swindled out of $3 million in commission by a former Philippine government cabinet minister. My wife ran away with another man and took our two kids, and there I was all alone and 10,000 miles from home without a pot to piss in. I sold a few remaining things in my office to raise enough for a one-way ticket back to the States. I was forty years old at the time, and I returned to my roots with everything I owned in two suitcases and $900 to my name. I went to work in my oppressive father's factory sweeping floors for $7.50 an hour for the next 3 years until I finally cut the cord and went into the funeral home/cemetery industry where I managed properties for 13 years until taking an early retirement and moving to Thailand in 2010.

The moral of the story is that one can start over again, and prosper again over time, if he's willing to humble himself and start at the bottom if necessary. I imagine that this fellow in the OP's story is still trying to hold onto the dream and hasn't quite accepted the fact that he is going to have to downgrade his life in order to survive. The fancy house, cars and business is only "stuff" and can be replaced...and so can the wife! So, my advice would be to let it go and return home...pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get moving before the depression takes you to the edge of a balcony.

[sunshine51]

I'd go home, generally you can survive in a western world country without any money but you can't in Thailand !

I agree with this post. It's time to suck it up & go home. Leave the excess baggage

and the "wife" in LOS. Being 60 or thereabouts your "friend" should have known

better than to let himself get into the position he's in at the moment. Don't loan

him any money...he can get some if needed that bad outta the home...that is if he

really has this huge home.

[norrona]

I lived in the Philippines for 11 years and ran my own multi-million dollar real estate operation selling US properties to foreign investors around SE Asia. I married a Filipina hiso type and was living the lifestyle of the rich and famous until 1988 when I sold $70 million worth of real estate and got swindled out of $3 million in commission by a former Philippine government cabinet minister. My wife ran away with another man and took our two kids, and there I was all alone and 10,000 miles from home without a pot to piss in. I sold a few remaining things in my office to raise enough for a one-way ticket back to the States. I was forty years old at the time, and I returned to my roots with everything I owned in two suitcases and $900 to my name. I went to work in my oppressive father's factory sweeping floors for $7.50 an hour for the next 3 years until I finally cut the cord and went into the funeral home/cemetery industry where I managed properties for 13 years until taking an early retirement and moving to Thailand in 2010.

The moral of the story is that one can start over again, and prosper again over time, if he's willing to humble himself and start at the bottom if necessary. I imagine that this fellow in the OP's story is still trying to hold onto the dream and hasn't quite accepted the fact that he is going to have to downgrade his life in order to survive. The fancy house, cars and business is only "stuff" and can be replaced...and so can the wife! So, my advice would be to let it go and return home...pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get moving before the depression takes you to the edge of a balcony.

the above is a 'mans' way to deal with things....

the last bit of it is a cowards.

Deal with it

[ozyjon]

What a great story, only to re-state that we do need some form of insurance in one way or another,, my friend is living the dream right now,, moved here, lives with his girl (won't marry her) bought the house and the car and only 5 months later the cracks are starting to show, pehaps because he is a little older is finding the smallest things irritating especially the way the Thais drive, be patient i tell him,, you are a guest here in the land od smiles so behave like that, we have talked upon your subject and the bottom line is that your friend would be better off going back to his native country if for one thing only,, he will be elegible for free medical no matter where he comes from, also the familiality of his environment will relax him mentally,, it's my exit strategy and many of my friends here as well,, maybe there is something in it. Never burn all the bridges behind you, there might be a need to cross them back in the future.

[robblok]

I lived in the Philippines for 11 years and ran my own multi-million dollar real estate operation selling US properties to foreign investors around SE Asia. I married a Filipina hiso type and was living the lifestyle of the rich and famous until 1988 when I sold $70 million worth of real estate and got swindled out of $3 million in commission by a former Philippine government cabinet minister. My wife ran away with another man and took our two kids, and there I was all alone and 10,000 miles from home without a pot to piss in. I sold a few remaining things in my office to raise enough for a one-way ticket back to the States. I was forty years old at the time, and I returned to my roots with everything I owned in two suitcases and $900 to my name. I went to work in my oppressive father's factory sweeping floors for $7.50 an hour for the next 3 years until I finally cut the cord and went into the funeral home/cemetery industry where I managed properties for 13 years until taking an early retirement and moving to Thailand in 2010.

The moral of the story is that one can start over again, and prosper again over time, if he's willing to humble himself and start at the bottom if necessary. I imagine that this fellow in the OP's story is still trying to hold onto the dream and hasn't quite accepted the fact that he is going to have to downgrade his life in order to survive. The fancy house, cars and business is only "stuff" and can be replaced...and so can the wife! So, my advice would be to let it go and return home...pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get moving before the depression takes you to the edge of a balcony.

the above is a 'mans' way to deal with things....

the last bit of it is a cowards.

Deal with it

Coward or not if you have nobody then suicide is not a cowards thing but just an other choice in my book. Its not something i would easily choose but why live on if there is nothing else to live for ? Suicide is only a bad thing if you hurt people with it.. hard to do if your alone.

[Showbags]

I lived in the Philippines for 11 years and ran my own multi-million dollar real estate operation selling US properties to foreign investors around SE Asia. I married a Filipina hiso type and was living the lifestyle of the rich and famous until 1988 when I sold $70 million worth of real estate and got swindled out of $3 million in commission by a former Philippine government cabinet minister. My wife ran away with another man and took our two kids, and there I was all alone and 10,000 miles from home without a pot to piss in. I sold a few remaining things in my office to raise enough for a one-way ticket back to the States. I was forty years old at the time, and I returned to my roots with everything I owned in two suitcases and $900 to my name. I went to work in my oppressive father's factory sweeping floors for $7.50 an hour for the next 3 years until I finally cut the cord and went into the funeral home/cemetery industry where I managed properties for 13 years until taking an early retirement and moving to Thailand in 2010.

The moral of the story is that one can start over again, and prosper again over time, if he's willing to humble himself and start at the bottom if necessary. I imagine that this fellow in the OP's story is still trying to hold onto the dream and hasn't quite accepted the fact that he is going to have to downgrade his life in order to survive. The fancy house, cars and business is only "stuff" and can be replaced...and so can the wife! So, my advice would be to let it go and return home...pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get moving before the depression takes you to the edge of a balcony.

the above is a 'mans' way to deal with things....

the last bit of it is a cowards.

Deal with it

Hope he appreciated his Dad giving him such a gracious job within his company and business sweeping floors...or perhaps Daddy saw him for what he was, he must have lost a lot of money from all the previous business/deals to allow one deal let the whole lot tumble over....not even his real estate by the sounds.....just an agent.

Edited November 7, 2013 by Showbags

[quiuvo]

I like this because there was no animosity. We all cared for all of us. Like it should be!!

Take good care people of the world. I'm from crazy California and some mex from dad and mom. Love them..

[kevvy]

if there was a group of decent members on tv then maybe the group could meet with him and have a talk with him one on one and maybe he will benefit from the group. I know I am just dreaming , I will go now.

[Showbags]

if there was a group of decent members on tv then maybe the group could meet with him and have a talk with him one on one and maybe he will benefit from the group. I know I am just dreaming , I will go now.

There are decent members, just that nobody takes us seriously or they are all in Australia.

[Overcome]

Taking a different approach - there are times where nothing you do makes much difference and isolation plus the reality of the problems can become oppressive to the point there seems to be no positive future.

its counter-intuitive and may sound trite (definitely not meant in that way), but maybe what your friend needs to do is to get involved in actively helping others - whether that us as part if some formal group or informally.

That's not a Jedi mind trick - firstly it genuinely might provide a change if perspective and the discovery of meaning, value, or purpose in ways he didn't expect. And secondly it may bridge the time in which there's nothing he can do to change things - to a time where the other pieces on the chess board mkge to open up opportunities that just aren't visible now.

[Thomas33399]

Most people would like to help this man but the circumstances are vague.

Like so many topics on this site the answers meander around like the Murrumbidgee river.

It is easy to get locked up in circuitous rationale when faced with an ongoing problem.

If you want to help him then get him to define the problem or find someone who will talk to him and do this for him.

[kagan]

I'm not trolling I'm saying this honesty... Tell the guy to stop whining and get off his ass and do something about it. So ur dream life fell apart, welcome to the real world, shit happens. Fix it. Stay positive and figure it out. This could happen anywhere. Even in ur home country. The world is what u make it. He should have prepared but he didn't. So what. Who has it easy anyways?? Give him encouragement, be tough. Stop <deleted> crying. Use ur brain and get back on the horse, and stop blaming everything and everyone else. Figure it out pussy. That's what I would have said.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[Showbags]

I'm not trolling I'm saying this honesty... Tell the guy to stop whining and get off his ass and do something about it. So ur dream life fell apart, welcome to the real world, shit happens. Fix it. Stay positive and figure it out. This could happen anywhere. Even in ur home country. The world is what u make it. He should have prepared but he didn't. So what. Who has it easy anyways?? Give him encouragement, be tough. Stop fuc_king crying. Use ur brain and get back on the horse, and stop blaming everything and everyone else. Figure it out pussy. That's what I would have said.

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

And that would have pushed him over the edge, pulled out his ak47 from his bag and shot up the coffee shop....but otherwise well done

[Benmart]

Get a computer so he can write his own posts!!

On behalf of a friend??

Be nice. It's contagious.

[Benmart]

Sad story, but not out of the realm of believability. Many of us are so wrapped up in our mortal lives, that we don't seek guidance from a higher power, by whatever name. We aren't really in control and can only achieve true contentment and happiness by looking further than our checkbook, credit card, mortgage and bank account.

I'm not saying that we have to live in a cave and sell handmade trinkets, but heading full speed ahead without a spiritual plan dooms many to failure and pain.

In your friends case, maybe asking for guidance from whatever he believes in, might help him achieve resolution to this dilemma. Once he does that, he may just see his plan.

Edited November 7, 2013 by Benmart

[Benmart]

if there was a group of decent members on tv then maybe the group could meet with him and have a talk with him one on one and maybe he will benefit from the group. I know I am just dreaming , I will go now.

You are not dreaming. There is just such a group that I belong to. It's a fellowship that meets numerous times a day in different locations, discusses our mutual problems, doesn't cost anything and supports each other in good times and bad. It has saved my life and many others.

This too Shall Pass.

[Pantari]

I wouldn't have bought a home for someone else (outright).

My mrs has a 25 year home loan, if we part not my problem.

The first rule for people who only have savings, don't spend the savings on something foolish.

(Like a house and business for someone else)

It can't happen to everyone, only someone fairly foolish.

His options, go home or go Pattaya balcony.

So, we have .....you were foolish , go home, or commit suicide!

Outstanding compassionate contribution.

I would recommend, and would say so gently, to go home. It cannot get better here. In all ways, the country lacks any mechanism for improvement.

If the house is at least half in his name, hire a realtor, read the contract with a decent lawyer, accept the first offer. If not, pack it up this week and leave on the first decent fare and hope the partner will honor the relationship, but certainly don't count on it.

Place is only for the adventuresome, foolish or young. ( IMO )

[norrona]

I lived in the Philippines for 11 years and ran my own multi-million dollar real estate operation selling US properties to foreign investors around SE Asia. I married a Filipina hiso type and was living the lifestyle of the rich and famous until 1988 when I sold $70 million worth of real estate and got swindled out of $3 million in commission by a former Philippine government cabinet minister. My wife ran away with another man and took our two kids, and there I was all alone and 10,000 miles from home without a pot to piss in. I sold a few remaining things in my office to raise enough for a one-way ticket back to the States. I was forty years old at the time, and I returned to my roots with everything I owned in two suitcases and $900 to my name. I went to work in my oppressive father's factory sweeping floors for $7.50 an hour for the next 3 years until I finally cut the cord and went into the funeral home/cemetery industry where I managed properties for 13 years until taking an early retirement and moving to Thailand in 2010.

The moral of the story is that one can start over again, and prosper again over time, if he's willing to humble himself and start at the bottom if necessary. I imagine that this fellow in the OP's story is still trying to hold onto the dream and hasn't quite accepted the fact that he is going to have to downgrade his life in order to survive. The fancy house, cars and business is only "stuff" and can be replaced...and so can the wife! So, my advice would be to let it go and return home...pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get moving before the depression takes you to the edge of a balcony.

the above is a 'mans' way to deal with things....

the last bit of it is a cowards.

Deal with it

Coward or not if you have nobody then suicide is not a cowards thing but just an other choice in my book. Its not something i would easily choose but why live on if there is nothing else to live for ? Suicide is only a bad thing if you hurt people with it.. hard to do if your alone.

got nothing else to live for??? you will have exactly the same as what you came into the world with....

if you can walk-talk and even get half a semi on then you've got more than a lot of people out there.....

I don't feel sorry for those that take suicide as an option when they are feeling hard done by.... go to any hospital in this world where patients are waiting to meet their maker for whatever terminal illness they have and spend time with those poor people, then walk out of there and have the <deleted> to say you can't do it anymore and want to end your life!

Perhaps that's what people who take that option need... a near death experience!

If they have mental problems that makes them want to do themselves in then fair enough.... but an able bodied person who has their health....sorry that's just selfish!

signed, one of many commuters who feel nothing for the person that's thrown themselves under a train and caused thousands of people hold ups and delays!

Cheers

Edited November 7, 2013 by norrona