jaapfries Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Call back and book the room in friends name...then just tell him job done....you got it for him as a surprise weekend away. Showbags: I don;t know what you do for a living, but that is a brilliant suggestion; I'm kicking myself for not thinking of that ! ! ! Chapeau to you ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggold Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 if he is just a colleague stay out of it.if he is a very very close friend you have to find a way to let him know. he's a colleague and I would say a friend, but not "very very" close. We sit next to each other every day and eat lunch together 3/5 days and thus we have gotten to know each other very well the past couple years.... but Im putting myself in his shoes and imagining if I was a 60 yr old Brit who had been in TH for 30 years, would I appreciate an American half my age letting me know that im being duped? It would be hard to swallow especially as "my gfs resort" has become a point of pride for him. Im staying quiet..but its hard. Right. if you hit him with the bad news, be prepared to have him come back at you negatively. My humble suggestion: If you are working with him, not an associate easily avoided, 100% stay the hell out of it. Bottom line: A guy here 30 years gets run-through this sort of typical scam? ... You would have thought a guy who has been here that length of time would know the score? I can't feel sorry for I guy who lets this happen to himself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andre0720 Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 If I were you, I would tell him right away... But it does not really matter whether you tell him or not, because, like so many others, he will not believe you.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnlandy Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Stay out of it.....often enough at the end both are angry with you.... I say he should go for it. 'it is only gutless prycks who would stand by and see their friends scammed. If he loses the guy as a friend he never was a friend and better to have a conscience anyway' 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaapfries Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 I'll throw one more into the thought......... Relationships come and go, true friends can last a lifetime ! Yes; and "The Road to Hell is Paved With Good Intentions . . . . . ." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozyjon Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Groundhog day,, again,, sad but true,, some years ago a video of an Aussie guy went viral on You tube about the same thing in Phuket, a guy mortgaged his elderley mums home, sent the money to the Thai G/F in Phuket when the resort was finished she kicked him out and moved the Thai husband in,, maybe someone knows the video if it is still around could upload it for all to see (again) the guy and mom are homeless now with a MILLION DOLLAR debt. Ouch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcel1 Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 If you not say it what does it make of you? cowerd, rat worse? if you do say it youre maybe an ass but, in the end he will know you were right and honest. but please be 100000% sure before breaking a word Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellodolly Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 if he is just a colleague stay out of it.if he is a very very close friend you have to find a way to let him know. I agree with you but what I can not quite understand is his friend has been here in Thailand for 30 years and should know the game by now. Then you throw in the big age difference. But as you say if you are a true friend it is a different story. You would definatly run the risk of being in hot water. But then again being a true friend is not always peaches and cream. Many people say they are friends until they see you in trouble and then disappear. Back home I used to watch it when people were moving and asking for help. Darn few people showed up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellodolly Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Stay out of it.....often enough at the end both are angry with you.... I say he should go for it. 'it is only gutless prycks who would stand by and see their friends scammed. If he loses the guy as a friend he never was a friend and better to have a conscience anyway' width=25 alt=thumbsup.gif> I never looked at it that way but you have point's here a good one about having a conscience and if you lose him as a friend he never was a real friend. People look at it this way if you were the one being conned and your good friend never said a word would you be happy about it when you found out your supposed good friend knew about it all along? On another semi related point where do you two work that you make that kind of money? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little mary sunshine Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 MYOB, He is just one of the "over the hill viagra romeos" who wouldn't believe you anyway............We'll hear him crying about how he was taken by a Thai Woman in a few months here on TV............You just have to let "Stupid be Stupid"............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 MYOB, He is just one of the "over the hill viagra romeos" who wouldn't believe you anyway............We'll hear him crying about how he was taken by a Thai Woman in a few months here on TV............You just have to let "Stupid be Stupid"............. When does your book come out, published. ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackinbkk Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Book the room, stay the couple of nights and see what she's up to. If she's playing around then you need to tell him. What a mess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellodolly Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 kblaze, I truly feel for you, horrible situation to be in. As you work next to this guy, you also have to take into account of what 'telling him the truth' really means when it comes to your working relationship if he spits the dummy and starts 'protecting' his investment through denial that this could never happen. However, your bottling the truth up can also lead to a change in relationship. All depends how much of a friend he is. After running a bar here for 13 years, I fully understand your position. It is one of the things I don't miss, and that is lying or not telling the full truth to stay neutral in certain circumstances.. thanks chris; I think I had a window, when today at lunch she called and then he immediately thereafter mentioned to me that she had said the resort was booked and that there wasn't room for his friend. He actually let some frustration out at that moment and I think that was my window to say "hey what if I call XXX and try to book a room to see if its really full". Now that hours have passed and we haven't talked about it, I think that it would be strange to bring it up. The next time he expresses frustration and doubt I will definitely confront him more boldly (i think the time is coming because she is supposed to start paying him back soon). I disagree with you now is the perfect time. go to him and tell him you couldent help but notice he was upset so you checked on it. Admit you had been worring about it for a while and now you could see that it was bothering him also. So you checked. good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackinbkk Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Book the room, stay the couple of nights and see what she's up to. If she's playing around then you need to tell him. What a mess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benmart Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 "No good deed goes unpunished". It is unfortunate that another person is being taken advantage of in an all too common scenario. If you decide to get involved, it may get ugly, with you the focus of attention by both parties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XDoodlebugger Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 The only thing I would say is "How long have you been in Thailand?" and "I think you know what's going on". It would be that brief over lunch or between desk chatter, anything more than that opens you up for splash back. I've lived/worked/visted Thailand for ther last 29 years and don't recall anyone being happy with a friend who went out of their way to set someone straight. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benmart Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 "No good deed goes unpunished". It is unfortunate that another person is being taken advantage of in an all too common scenario. If you decide to get involved, it may get ugly, with you the focus of attention by both parties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Sorry if it is a bit off topic but 3 ''resorts'' near me are ''knocking'' shops. Everyone locally knows it too. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hellodolly Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 MYOB, He is just one of the "over the hill viagra romeos" who wouldn't believe you anyway............We'll hear him crying about how he was taken by a Thai Woman in a few months here on TV............You just have to let "Stupid be Stupid"............. When does your book come out, published. ? I want to know what the title is so I don't waste money on his non biased book. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sgtsabai Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Tell him. I know if it were me I would want to know. For those that have not graduated the Water Buffalo University and think they know all, it will never happen to you, you are wrong. Tell the man everything you know and if he can't take the truth, tough. There are people, mostly Thai/Lao that know what has happened with me, but they only give info in dribbles, ah water-boarding anyone? I've only been here 11 years, I'm still trying to find out what has happened and that is as far as I go just in case some busy body figures out who I am, wants to run their mouth and screw up my marriage next. Farangs are as bad in gossip as the Thai women that love to start trouble with their gossip. The truth, the truth, the truth. I'd rather have the pain from the truth than the pain from not knowing. Now studying for a graduate degree at Water Buffalo U. It all boils down to money, each and every time, even if she does care just a little about you. Family first, always and she will always go with the money, always. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
truckerjoe Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 I was once asked by a friend not long in Pattaya "what do you think of my girlfriend and her business plans", I made the mistake of telling him what I really thought and not what he wanted to hear, I didn't like her, I knew she had sponsors from at least three countries he didn't know about, and this little street wise piranha like creature was going to pick him clean. Surprise Surprise, he didn't talk to me again for years, and he did get picked clean. I have been asked similar question since by guys, but now I just bite my tongue so to speak! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kikoman Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Personally I would not get involved, as you could come out not being welcome by either one of them in the future. Him being a 60 year old living in Thailand for the past 30 year's he has heard all the That (wife/GF) story's and may not look kindly at you mingling in his life. Do both of your selves a favor and stay out of his private life. Cheers: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Usual Suspect Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 If your friend has been in Thailand 30 years, he should know the ropes by now. Maybe he knows more about his gf than you think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Usual Suspect Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 If your friend has lived in Thailand for 30 years, he should know the ropes by now. If I were you, I'd stay out of it. Maybe he knows a lot more about his gf than you think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brit1984 Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 i expect there is (much) more to the story than what the OP thinks he knows it seems illogical that the wife would pretend the resort is busier than it actually is (the opposite maybe) more likely she (or maybe even he) just doesn't want / need the extra hassle of hosting friends regardless, it is inconceivable that the OP has discovered something his friend doesn't already know many people tell lies to their partners - and nearly as many people know their partners lie to them snitching on all the liars would be quite pointless and very time consuming 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
impulse Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Maybe she just doesn't like his friend. Maybe there's a good reason she doesn't like his friend. I'd keep my mouth shut unless I had a lot more background. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silent Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 Call back and book the room in friends name...then just tell him job done....you got it for him as a surprise weekend away. Absolutely, then stay out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevozman1 Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 (edited) If he is a real friend then tell him what is happening. If more of an aquaintance then maybe you telling him what is happening would not be best move. He will obviously have way more trust and loyalty to his gf than someone he does not really know too well. Strange though that a guy 30 years in Thailand is still geting played so hard, he must kind of enjoy it all in a perverse sort of way. Edited November 12, 2013 by kevozman1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silent Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 i expect there is (much) more to the story than what the OP thinks he knows it seems illogical that the wife would pretend the resort is busier than it actually is (the opposite maybe) more likely she (or maybe even he) just doesn't want / need the extra hassle of hosting friends regardless, it is inconceivable that the OP has discovered something his friend doesn't already know many people tell lies to their partners - and nearly as many people know their partners lie to them snitching on all the liars would be quite pointless and very time consuming Godamn I should have taken marriage psychology 101, instead of wasting a fortune after thinking that she couldn't tell the truth if her life depended on it. Of course not........... Mine did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracker1 Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 I would suggest if you wish to retain the friendship of your friend, stay out of any discussions about his "Resort" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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