Another one bites the dust...

[Mudcrab]

I don't want to come off as rude or racist or judging, but there is my interpretation.

Thai girls that have NPD have potentially been involved with many guys and / or bar work / or worse. You either need to have NPD to work in those industries or you will develop it naturally since you need to trade yourself for money. = BIG warning sign, pull out immediately.

If your girl comes from a poor family, chances are you are being duped. Exercise caution and don't make her the owner of your business.

If there is a significant age gap, realize that in 9/10 cases you are being duped for money. Exercise extreme caution and don't make her the owner of your business.

If your girl comes from the northeast (bear with me) and has had many farang boyfriends before you, PULL OUT NOW. You are being duped for sure.

If your girl hangs around farangs a lot and seems to like white guys / has many commenting on her posts / texting her, exercise caution and don't invest in the relationship. Probably a gold digger.

To summarize: If it seems too good and jolly to be true it probably is. There are tons of good girls in this country that wouldn't steal from you and wouldn't be out for money. You just need to date from a different pool. If you find someone who is the opposite of all the points I posted above you should be fine. And don't trust people too much, period.

Don't quite like your ''North East'' Thailand comment.

My ex wife who tried to rip me off came from S.E. London.................

My first wife, non thai european tried to rip me off during the divorce, but when she realized I was entitled to 50% of all her future earnings as a lawyer (as I supported her through law school) she agreed to an amicable settlement.

And yes I was also married to an N.E. thai woman that never scammed or ripped me off because there are pockets of integrity.

orI dont use the above as a way to rationalize, deflect, or diminish the realities of thailand and very significant scamming that exists and statistically is likely higher in NE due to socioeconomic facts.

orI dont use the above as a way to rationalize, deflect, or diminish the realities of thailand and very significant scamming that exists and statistically is likely higher in NE due to socioeconomic facts.

Or due to the preponderance of stupid middle aged farangs

Edited January 27, 2014 by Mudcrab

[johnbarpic]

Sorry ot hear of your plight

but could have happened in any country

ADVICE dust yourself off get back in the game: proceed with caution but for certain hold regular Audits to check all sysytems are working & inplace Family or not conduct the Audits for all processes many smll businesses fail to audit there systems & acounts only when they need to pay taxes.. not enough to be in busines you have to make many decisions a soft hearted person would not contemplate never mind take.

good luck in your road to recovery it can be done

J B-P

[Mudcrab]

There are thousands and thousands of similar stories. Most Thai care only about ONE THING MONEY and will say or do anything to get it and they are NEVER SATISFIED no matter how much they get. Learn from your mistake and don't do it again. Some stupid Westerners repeat the same mistakes time and time again. I have learned my lesson after losing a furnished house etc etc!

But the money didn't bother you? You are the same as me, me and everyone else in the world. Money is important. It is what allows us to live and eat. And if we have a lot it allows us to enjoy ourselves. The pointless and ongoing postings about Thais and their obsession with money is ridiculous. It applies to every country and race in the world.

[brit1984]

Yes she has a gambling addiction but as another poster suggested that is a sympton rather than a cause of all this.

Sometimes I would learn that she was gambling and after I asked why she would say because she wants to make money!

I am not saying all Thais are evil, but some live in dream world that is completely disconnected to reality.

Brit thanks for sharing...and in the process, putting yourself out there for endless (merciless) ridicule.

The one thing that has always perplexed me is this "gambling" thing. I've always thought that this was the domain of drug-addicted bargirls and the like, in some tiny, smoke-filled sh*thole deep in someone's basement. But you seem to suggest that your wife gambled away millions. How can she possibly do that? It's not like she can walk into a Vegas-style casino and put down 100K bt on blackjack. Has anyone ever seen these girls with alleged gambling-addictions actually gambling? I haven't.

Just wondering if she really gambled it away, or is the cash safely parked away in a Swiss bank account.

She played online casino on her iPhone via VPN.

[oogster8]

There are thousands and thousands of similar stories. Most Thai care only about ONE THING MONEY and will say or do anything to get it and they are NEVER SATISFIED no matter how much they get. Learn from your mistake and don't do it again. Some stupid Westerners repeat the same mistakes time and time again. I have learned my lesson after losing a furnished house etc etc!

Tell us your story. Sounds like a north girl story with you losing a house. I still need convinving on men being this silly.

Did the girl say she will love you more once the house is finished................lol. That both of you will be buried in the back yard?

[Mudcrab]

Yes she has a gambling addiction but as another poster suggested that is a sympton rather than a cause of all this.

Sometimes I would learn that she was gambling and after I asked why she would say because she wants to make money!

I am not saying all Thais are evil, but some live in dream world that is completely disconnected to reality.

Brit thanks for sharing...and in the process, putting yourself out there for endless (merciless) ridicule.

The one thing that has always perplexed me is this "gambling" thing. I've always thought that this was the domain of drug-addicted bargirls and the like, in some tiny, smoke-filled sh*thole deep in someone's basement. But you seem to suggest that your wife gambled away millions. How can she possibly do that? It's not like she can walk into a Vegas-style casino and put down 100K bt on blackjack. Has anyone ever seen these girls with alleged gambling-addictions actually gambling? I haven't.

Just wondering if she really gambled it away, or is the cash safely parked away in a Swiss bank account.

She played online casino on her iPhone via VPN.

So sorry mate. This is a scourge that should be banned worldwide. But it will never happen unfortunately.

[Andre0720]

really out of curiosity, i notice that you did have more than 3000 messages on tv, so here my question: Are you one of those members

who spent their times claiming how much their gf/wife is different, that she come from a good family, she is so honest, you can trust her with you life, she will never harm you, she is the best thing that did happen in your life, and she love you maak????!

(Well inspite of warning, the cultural gap, language barriere, difference of wealth, her family, etc etc)

Because if you are one of them, who spent his times to spread myths and <deleted> on tv, well in fact you might have fooled some other members, but the biggest victims is...you!

Now its time for some weeks holidays, and after to start to build back yourself, and dont run again in the same problems as it seems that some never learn.......

That is a very interesting post.

I'm one of the guys who didn't discover Thaivisa (or really know anything about Thailand) until AFTER I married my wife.

Now I would actually say my wife is very DIFFERENT because most Thai people are not evil monsters with NPD.

We kinda knew that roughly 90% is not all of them....

[Andre0720]

There are thousands and thousands of similar stories. Most Thai care only about ONE THING MONEY and will say or do anything to get it and they are NEVER SATISFIED no matter how much they get. Learn from your mistake and don't do it again. Some stupid Westerners repeat the same mistakes time and time again. I have learned my lesson after losing a furnished house etc etc!

But the money didn't bother you? You are the same as me, me and everyone else in the world. Money is important. It is what allows us to live and eat. And if we have a lot it allows us to enjoy ourselves. The pointless and ongoing postings about Thais and their obsession with money is ridiculous. It applies to every country and race in the world.

Might apply to most every country in the world.

However, elsewhere, most people do not get their money by means of deception as much as here...

[Berkshire]

Yes she has a gambling addiction but as another poster suggested that is a sympton rather than a cause of all this.

Sometimes I would learn that she was gambling and after I asked why she would say because she wants to make money!

I am not saying all Thais are evil, but some live in dream world that is completely disconnected to reality.

Brit thanks for sharing...and in the process, putting yourself out there for endless (merciless) ridicule.

The one thing that has always perplexed me is this "gambling" thing. I've always thought that this was the domain of drug-addicted bargirls and the like, in some tiny, smoke-filled sh*thole deep in someone's basement. But you seem to suggest that your wife gambled away millions. How can she possibly do that? It's not like she can walk into a Vegas-style casino and put down 100K bt on blackjack. Has anyone ever seen these girls with alleged gambling-addictions actually gambling? I haven't.

Just wondering if she really gambled it away, or is the cash safely parked away in a Swiss bank account.

She played online casino on her iPhone via VPN.

Aaaaah, that's brutal.

[oogster8]

Senoir managers taking no pay till everything is settled? Do they have stock worth millions? Im starting to the agree with the guy who says troll or just humor story.

[jomcondo]

never get involved with a thai woman past ejaculation

[Showbags]

There are card games and illegal casinos everywhere in Thailand.

You should take a look around you more often.

Yes, I'm sure that's what you've heard. Me too. Have you actually been to one? Seen these girls with gambling addictions going at it?

yes

[Showbags]

never get involved with a thai woman past ejaculation

Hers or yours ?

[recycler]

@brit.. is what your wife has cure-able / treatable.. and is it forgive able.. you should ask you those things. Personally I would have a real hard time forgiving even if its caused by a (mental) illness. But keeping kids from their mother however bad she is is never a real good idea. Unless there is a high risk of self harm and harming the children.

I had a GF with BPD, a personality disorder of the same group including also anxiety etc. and did some research on it and treatment is extremely difficult.

Patients will always deny their condition and refuse treatment, if they agree on treatment it is to fool the medics as soon as they can and get out again. A temporary solution can be medication, but never on the long term.

Advice from most people is as soon as you discover this is RUN! Problem is that most people with personality disorders are very well trained in hiding their condition at first, so it all seems heaven on earth the first period until some unexpected emotional luggage is unpacked and their behavior towards you and others gradually changes. Most people with partners like this stay in denial for a long time, it often takes somebody else with experience to open your eyes.

BPD? What's that?. How have we, as a species, suddenly developed all these three letter acronyms for conditions that have been around for centuries, if not millennia, and now have to categorise and make excuse for them.

We now have stress related illnesses from social media. Excuse me, bullies have been around before we learned to walk on two feet.

A bastards always been a bastard and a bitch has always been a bitch.

An uncontrollable kid needs a flogging and an uncontrollable adult needs jail. My apologies to the PC apologists and the millionaire psychologists/psychiatrists and the hordes of public servants who survive and prosper on this fraud.

Borderline Personality Disorder, see cluster B in personality disorders: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personality_disorder

[SNGLIFE]

@brit1984

Thanks for sharing your story. So far, I am married 9+ years and not in that boat. No problems to speak of and I hope it continues that way. Still, your story is a good reminder to continue to be vigilant. In our case, we have a lucrative entirely web-based business set up for her [and our 2 kids] in the event anything happens to me. The business, based in Thailand, is entirely in her name. The bank account is also entirely in her name. Still, I have complete control over the web-site (registered in the USA) and domains. So, if she ever skipped-out, I need only point the payment processor to any other account and not miss a beat.

Stay vigilant. Your message is well-received.

I hope things work out in your situation. It sounds like you are going to be ok in time.

[Neeeko]

That sucks, sorry to hear this. Try carry on the best you can and look after your children the best you can.

[Berkshire]

There are card games and illegal casinos everywhere in Thailand.

You should take a look around you more often.

Yes, I'm sure that's what you've heard. Me too. Have you actually been to one? Seen these girls with gambling addictions going at it?

yes

What sorts of card games do they play? How much are they playing for? Genuinely curious.

[jacko45k]

Strange that you can, as the business owner and manager, let debts become so large, without knowing about it.

Anyway, by the sounds of it you have a good business, so work around it and trade out if you can...think how good the future will be without her and her hands in the till........head down, arse up and make it happen.....for the kids if nothing else.

Sorry to say he made a poor selection for a wife and did a poor job of managing the business.

Good luck to him recovering from this and do not take her back!!!!!

[zyphodb]

@brit.. is what your wife has cure-able / treatable.. and is it forgive able.. you should ask you those things. Personally I would have a real hard time forgiving even if its caused by a (mental) illness. But keeping kids from their mother however bad she is is never a real good idea. Unless there is a high risk of self harm and harming the children.

I had a GF with BPD, a personality disorder of the same group including also anxiety etc. and did some research on it and treatment is extremely difficult.

Patients will always deny their condition and refuse treatment, if they agree on treatment it is to fool the medics as soon as they can and get out again. A temporary solution can be medication, but never on the long term.

Advice from most people is as soon as you discover this is RUN! Problem is that most people with personality disorders are very well trained in hiding their condition at first, so it all seems heaven on earth the first period until some unexpected emotional luggage is unpacked and their behavior towards you and others gradually changes. Most people with partners like this stay in denial for a long time, it often takes somebody else with experience to open your eyes.

I'm sorry to say this but what you all seem to be trying to rationalise as some kind of mental disorder just seems to be greed to me, this is part of the human condition & the less morality that was drummed into you as a child the more unadulterated greed is going to come out as an adult, especially with all the shit that Thais & everybody else are brought up watching on TV. This whole idea of making basic emotions out to be some sad psychological trauma rather than dealing with them as they really are is a large part of the problem as far as I can see.... Excuses, excuses, excuses....

[transam]

Strange that you can, as the business owner and manager, let debts become so large, without knowing about it.

Anyway, by the sounds of it you have a good business, so work around it and trade out if you can...think how good the future will be without her and her hands in the till........head down, arse up and make it happen.....for the kids if nothing else.

Sorry to say he made a poor selection for a wife and did a poor job of managing the business.

Good luck to him recovering from this and do not take her back!!!!!

If we all made the right wife choice there would be no such thing as divorce would there....... ...............

[Neeranam]

There are card games and illegal casinos everywhere in Thailand.

You should take a look around you more often.

Yes, I'm sure that's what you've heard. Me too. Have you actually been to one? Seen these girls with gambling addictions going at it?

yes

What sorts of card games do they play? How much are they playing for? Genuinely curious.

Bpok Deng(ป๊อกเด้ง) is the most common one.

[Anon999]

really out of curiosity, i notice that you did have more than 3000 messages on tv, so here my question: Are you one of those members

who spent their times claiming how much their gf/wife is different, that she come from a good family, she is so honest, you can trust her with you life, she will never harm you, she is the best thing that did happen in your life, and she love you maak????!

(Well inspite of warning, the cultural gap, language barriere, difference of wealth, her family, etc etc)

Because if you are one of them, who spent his times to spread myths and <deleted> on tv, well in fact you might have fooled some other members, but the biggest victims is...you!

Now its time for some weeks holidays, and after to start to build back yourself, and dont run again in the same problems as it seems that some never learn.......

That is a very interesting post.

I'm one of the guys who didn't discover Thaivisa (or really know anything about Thailand) until AFTER I married my wife.

Now I would actually say my wife is very DIFFERENT because most Thai people are not evil monsters with NPD.

I am surprised that in the 2 years you have been a member of TV and bearing in mind how busy you have been with growing the business, that you've found time to write over 9 posts every day, on average. How's that? However, I can only assume that an audit has not been done, nor annual accounts, very strange!

[ozyjon]

Good luck, nearly $700 K in debt,, huge hole to get out of in these uncertain times,,,

It's OK though, been there also. Huh the wheels go round and round.

[Anon999]

Well to my knowledge it also happens in the UK so what makes you think things are going to be any different in Thailand?

[FiftyTwo]

Yes, I'm sure that's what you've heard. Me too. Have you actually been to one? Seen these girls with gambling addictions going at it?

yes

What sorts of card games do they play? How much are they playing for? Genuinely curious.

Bpok Deng(ป๊อกเด้ง) is the most common one.

Yes, I didn't understand the card game, but I did join in with Dominoes a few times.

Lucky me, I was sitting out of the game eating lunch when police burst in, loaded all the girls into a pickup, and took them to the police station. Night in the cells and 500bht fine for everyone playing, judge saw them all next morning. Dominoes 10bht a hand, cards gold bracelets, rings and necklaces seemed to change hands.

Then I was with the same girl when her family took us to the casino near Korat, they ran a free minibus from Korat to the casino over the border every day, all older Thai ladies.

Edited January 27, 2014 by FiftyTwo

[saroq]

really out of curiosity, i notice that you did have more than 3000 messages on tv, so here my question: Are you one of those members

who spent their times claiming how much their gf/wife is different, that she come from a good family, she is so honest, you can trust her with you life, she will never harm you, she is the best thing that did happen in your life, and she love you maak????!

(Well inspite of warning, the cultural gap, language barriere, difference of wealth, her family, etc etc)

Because if you are one of them, who spent his times to spread myths and <deleted> on tv, well in fact you might have fooled some other members, but the biggest victims is...you!

Now its time for some weeks holidays, and after to start to build back yourself, and dont run again in the same problems as it seems that some never learn.......

You come off sounding very bitter. Do you think that if there aren't language, culture or age differences there won't be unhappy marriages that end in divorce? The statistics in the West would tend to disprove that idea. You can't paint Thai people with the same brush any more than you can Western people. Some are good, some are not. There are very happy successful marriages that have all of the elements above and I know of many.

[brit1984]

really out of curiosity, i notice that you did have more than 3000 messages on tv, so here my question: Are you one of those members

who spent their times claiming how much their gf/wife is different, that she come from a good family, she is so honest, you can trust her with you life, she will never harm you, she is the best thing that did happen in your life, and she love you maak????!

(Well inspite of warning, the cultural gap, language barriere, difference of wealth, her family, etc etc)

Because if you are one of them, who spent his times to spread myths and <deleted> on tv, well in fact you might have fooled some other members, but the biggest victims is...you!

Now its time for some weeks holidays, and after to start to build back yourself, and dont run again in the same problems as it seems that some never learn.......

That is a very interesting post.

I'm one of the guys who didn't discover Thaivisa (or really know anything about Thailand) until AFTER I married my wife.

Now I would actually say my wife is very DIFFERENT because most Thai people are not evil monsters with NPD.

I am surprised that in the 2 years you have been a member of TV and bearing in mind how busy you have been with growing the business, that you've found time to write over 9 posts every day, on average. How's that? However, I can only assume that an audit has not been done, nor annual accounts, very strange!

I don't drink alcohol or watch television, and only sleep 4-5 hours/night, so finding ~20 minutes/day to post on here isn't that difficult.

As mentioned earlier in the thread, I use the forum less than I used to but I do not view posting on here as a waste of time as it's helped me in many ways.

I think the issues would have indeed shown up during an accounting process but most of this has happened within the last year.

[HardenedSoul]

Senoir managers taking no pay till everything is settled? Do they have stock worth millions? Im starting to the agree with the guy who says troll or just humor story.

<deleted>, Oogster, could you be any more of a pillock?

Can't you just go back to your barstool?

You seem to take pleasure in the fact that a foreigner who came here and built a successful business has been hosed.

Does it make you feel better about your own ineptitude?

[leosuntime]

I dont want to be the party pooper but did all you baby boomers not stop and wonder why your children are as poor as F__k

u scammed your children u just r too evil to let the puzzle pieces assemble im your minds on how it was done

NOW u are using another mechanism to scam thais

shame no one can figure it all out

I GONNA CHEER THE THAI SCAMMERS ON

[transam]

I dont want to be the party pooper but did all you baby boomers not stop and wonder why your children are as poor as F__k

u scammed your children u just r too evil to let the puzzle pieces assemble im your minds on how it was done

NOW u are using another mechanism to scam thais

shame no one can figure it all out

I GONNA CHEER THE THAI SCAMMERS ON

Try Chang beer, it might help you..............