tartempion Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Many farangs fall in this trap. Burden your life with all That? (children, ex, grand parents, brothers , sisters, uncles and nieces) No thanks 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Many farangs fall in this trap. Burden your life with all That? (children, ex, grand parents, brothers , sisters, uncles and nieces) No thanks Weeeeeeeeeell, that is something farang folk must take on board if one takes on a LOS lady. It will not disappear. If your a rich guy that has NOT revealed your wealth then it is controllable. One must use your head from the start. If you "make out" your a rich guy or really are, you are stuffed. Trust me on that. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperylobster Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 She didn't mention the kids for 3 months -- guilty He didn't ask about kids for 3 months -- stupid maybe they deserve each other, but I'd watch out for the policeman !!!!! Get him away from that fast.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slipperylobster Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Now here is the kicker....him being a policeman near the tourist traps..... he might have only been a boyfriend... she is probably a mia noi. Why get stuck with his bills? And the first time your friend makes a mistake, this guy will be knocking on the door. Nightmare. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nowisee Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 If he doesn't want to take on the kids, he should end it with her now, and find a woman WITHOUT KIDS. Enough said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
humqdpf Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Lets just assume that your friend can persuade the lady to live with him or marry him but without the kids. How long would you think that would last before the cracks would show? Before long she would be squirreling away money for the kids - she would suffer psychologically from being deprived of her kids and that would have an effect on the relationship. That is not to mention the resentment that she might feel. More importantly, there is the matter of the husband. Given than he is not contributing (as far as we know!!), he may not care too much about his kids. But some Thai men retain a kind of ownership over their wives long after the relationship is over and they are living with someone else. Your friend should check the situation regarding the ex just in case. What would be very important would be to ensure that the divorce has already gone through otherwise there can be legal implications, as I understand it. Getting into a full relationship or marriage with a significant other involves taking on board all aspects of that person. That includes a woman's children and it will also include responsibilities that your significant other has, such as debts, Otherwise it would be best for the man to have a "gig" relationship or something like that. But having someone live with you on a full time basis is a very different prospect. Sometimes I think that certain falang men should be honest with themselves and hire a housekeeper "with benefits" rather than fool themselves that they are having a relationship with a partner/wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggles68 Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Been there done that, I wouldnt do it again there are so many fish in the sea with no kids so move on..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 I know a farang guy who married a bird and suddenly two kids turned up at his door, one young and one a "sniffer".................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hgv driver Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 I say get out while you can find another woman without kids, without kids? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel Boon Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 unequivocal yes ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
orchis Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 I would not trust a person who withheld this vital information from me for 3 months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slinky1958 Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 It s a scam thai style Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel Boon Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 pedophiles are known to seek out single mothers with young children ... preventative measure? just ask her ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
10Yen Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 pedophiles are known to seek out single mothers with young children ... preventative measure? just ask her ... Good point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted March 17, 2014 Author Share Posted March 17, 2014 I know a farang guy who married a bird and suddenly two kids turned up at his door, one young and one a "sniffer".................. sniffer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wym Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 You don't think 6 months is long enough to know someone? I know its only 2 weeks in person but 6 months is still a while. Esp, if you talk/video/FB every day. Soooooooo many people do it this way these days. Doesn't make it smart does it. You don't really start getting to know someone for real until you've spent hundreds of hours in person together under a variety of circumstances, ideally needing to solve significant problems together. In my book no substitute for living together, but then with some girls that's just not an option before putting a ring on it. Which of course is part of the whole traditional marriage scam. But so many fish in the sea here,just make that part of your filter - we will need to live together for at least a year before we can discuss marriage, take it or leave it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desdeash Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 I only look for women who have had kids. They totally understand why my children come first with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted March 17, 2014 Author Share Posted March 17, 2014 You don't think 6 months is long enough to know someone? I know its only 2 weeks in person but 6 months is still a while. Esp, if you talk/video/FB every day. Soooooooo many people do it this way these days. Doesn't make it smart does it. You don't really start getting to know someone for real until you've spent hundreds of hours in person together under a variety of circumstances, ideally needing to solve significant problems together. In my book no substitute for living together, but then with some girls that's just not an option before putting a ring on it. Which of course is part of the whole traditional marriage scam. But so many fish in the sea here,just make that part of your filter - we will need to live together for at least a year before we can discuss marriage, take it or leave it. I don't know if it is a matter of 'smart'. It might be a case of that is the best that can be done in circumstances given availability of time and distance It is very common these days for people to start off romances like this. 6 months chatting online is plenty of time to have done the first stage of due diligence. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiftyTwo Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 (edited) 6 months chatting online is plenty of time to have done the first stage of due diligence. Chatting online counts for nothing, you don't even know it is her on the other end. Plenty of Thai girls employing someone to do their online chatting and emailing for them. Part-time relationships only count for the part of the time you are actually with them. A two-week vacation with a Thai girl for two years counts as a one month relationship. Edited March 17, 2014 by FiftyTwo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wym Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Then how did the OP problem arise? Or minor details like kids is only relevant for Stage 2? Shopping for an SO is a major undertaking, if you don't have the circumstances to do it properly better off focusing on that issue first. Nothing can be done both hastily and prudently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiftyTwo Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Then how did the OP problem arise? Or minor details like kids is only relevant for Stage 2? Shopping for an SO is a major undertaking, if you don't have the circumstances to do it properly better off focusing on that issue first. Nothing can be done both hastily and prudently. I've found 1st naked experience soon tells you if she's had kids. That usually happens about 1 hour after the first meeting. OP 'friend' didn't meet her in person for months, so easy to scam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted March 17, 2014 Author Share Posted March 17, 2014 You should tell your friend to bail; there are plenty of single women without kids, he just has to look a little bit harder. There seems to be plenty of comments like this. But the reality is if you remove Thai single mothers from the dating pool, the number of Thai females available to foreigners would be reduced by something like 80%, if not more. If anything, farangs should be thanking the Thai guys for leaving so many desperate women to seek out foreigners (note: I say this in jest, although it's more true than we want to admit). What you say has some truth to it but 80% seems rather high IMO. I'd guess the percentage does go up with age though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted March 17, 2014 Author Share Posted March 17, 2014 6 months chatting online is plenty of time to have done the first stage of due diligence. Chatting online counts for nothing, you don't even know it is her on the other end. Plenty of Thai girls employing someone to do their online chatting and emailing for them. Part-time relationships only count for the part of the time you are actually with them. A two-week vacation with a Thai girl for two years counts as a one month relationship. Oh come on! People chatting online all the time with a GF/BF use one of a myriad of video chatting services on PC/laptop/tablet/smartphone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BookMan Posted March 17, 2014 Author Share Posted March 17, 2014 (edited) Duplicate post Edited March 17, 2014 by BookMan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wym Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Then how did the OP problem arise? Or minor details like kids is only relevant for Stage 2? Shopping for an SO is a major undertaking, if you don't have the circumstances to do it properly better off focusing on that issue first. Nothing can be done both hastily and prudently. I've found 1st naked experience soon tells you if she's had kids. That usually happens about 1 hour after the first meeting. OP 'friend' didn't meet her in person for months, so easy to scam. My point exactly. But beyond that "big rock" I'm also emphasizing that getting to know someone online is not at all reliable in general. Of course if she is sincere and open and honest it's pretty good. But if your objective is to determine whether or not she has those qualities, you need to get your lives and personalities entangled in Real Life over a period of time, ideally with stressful circumstances. And you should be very sure before making a commitment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil2 Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Shame on a Cop not taking responsibility for his kids. Pathetic. I believe that was what she told him! I always go to my daughter's school to pay her tuition, but last semester, her moter insisted on paying that I should transfer the money to her account. I refused, then she said I must give her the receipt after paying. Why? She's collecting the tuition from her boyfriend, so she wanted to have the receipt in her possession in case he asked for it. I didn't give it to her. I've taken care of three kids that weren't mine in the past, but I'll not do it again. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post GinBoy2 Posted March 17, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted March 17, 2014 Honestly, I think anyone with any knowledge of Thai's knows that any woman of a certain age will have kids. They probably were with the grandparents, that's pretty common. Parents (mom or dad) seem to be able to palm off the kids to Grandma and forget about them for considerable periods of time without a second thought, so the fact she never mentioned them for 3 months doesn't surprise me at all. The father(s) regardless of profession, income etc will contribute nothing. Mention 'child support' and you will get that Thai look of total incomprehension. So, I think your friend, if he wants to be with this woman, gets over the western idea of the biological father thingy and just deals with the package. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rgs2001uk Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 As the Thais say, love me love my dog. The Thais know this, thats why no Thai man of her peer group is interested, little miss riap roy knows that, thats why she hid the kids away when the dumb farang came a calling. Move on, nothing of note here, plenty of other women here who dont come with baggage or BS. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
visionchaser45 Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 (edited) "Farang scared shoe" Ask any Thai person to provide an interpretation. My wife told me she had only one child until we began the K-1 visa process; then, I found out she has three. I resented being lied to but understood that she was afraid I'd be scared off if I knew she had three children. The reason is the stereotype that farang will not accept kids because of the additional responsibility. I get it because many farang in Thailand are there because they are fleeing responsibility. Just my two baht worth. Edited March 17, 2014 by visionchaser45 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loles Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 I don't know Man. This woman is not fair cause she kept in secret her children for 3 months and now she wants your friend take care of them. This is a typical beginning for a walking ATM story. I think I wouldn't do it especially with a policeman ex-husband. Better if your friend seeks more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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