Are there civilized parts of Thailand where you don't get the "farang" treatment?

[squarethecircle]

Back in Thailand for the first time in a year and having some mixed feelings. Managed to get off the tourist trail for a quick minute and found people who were friendly as, but now back on it (up in the far North) and find people distinctly less friendly and sense a bit of anti-f*rang sentiment.

I've found a couple of places in other countries in Asia where I have felt completely like a local, was never referred to as a "foreigner", always was spoken to in the local language - one, a 2nd tier city on the east coast of China, and another in Laos. I'd really like to find a little pocket in Thailand where I feel like a local. I don't think this is too much to ask but I'm a bit put off by some things here, like the lady on the bus pointing at me and saying "you: fifteen baht", "you: off" or the like; it doesn't feel good.

So, I'm curious: have any of you found a little "civilized" pocket in Thailand where you feel like you blend in with the local population, don't feel like you're treated any differently, are consistently spoken to in the local language, etc.? I think there are a couple matters complicating this: (1) heavy tourist trail scattered all over the country, where less-friendly locals seem to congregate (and probably have bad attitudes due to bad tourists), (2) expats marrying locals, I'm afraid this has given us f-rangs a reputation as golden tickets and whore-mongers (3) lack of quality education. But I remain optimistic and would be glad to hear advice about how to find such pockets where I could blend in.

Edited July 13, 2014 by squarethecircle

[benalibina]

Seems to be like a thread to become negative about Thai people.

To answer your question......alone in your hotelroom. You should be fine there.

[Siamsky]

If you want to blend in why are you here? Seriously this is the East not the west, I wonder do you Treat Asians in your country the same as Locals?

You need to be thinking Big city like Bangkok if you want to Blend

[Eliot Rosewater]

If you want to blend in why are you here? Seriously this is the East not the west, I wonder do you Treat Asians in your country the same as Locals?

You need to be thinking Big city like Bangkok if you want to Blend

Where I'm from we treat asians the same as we treat anyone else

Remind me not to visit where you're from....

Sent from my GT-I9300T using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[GuestHouse]

Seems to be like a thread to become negative about Thai people.

To answer your question......alone in your hotelroom. You should be fine there.

I see the sensitivity to criticism of anything Thai dial is turned to full on this evening.

The OPs suggestion that Thai people in areas subject to high numbers of tourists are less friendly to foreigners than those in less well trodden areas is offensive because?

[Siamsky]

If you want to blend in why are you here? Seriously this is the East not the west, I wonder do you Treat Asians in your country the same as Locals?

You need to be thinking Big city like Bangkok if you want to Blend

Where I'm from we treat asians the same as we treat anyone else

Remind me not to visit where you're from....

Sent from my GT-I9300T using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

That's very PC of you, but it is a very generous positive view of human traits. Keep it real

[squarethecircle]

"Seems to be like a thread to become negative about Thai people.

To answer your question......alone in your hotelroom. You should be fine there. "

Hey, you must be a psychic. Just took a walk outside and found a bunch of drunk youngsters and did not feel safe.

But to be more clear: I have found 1 city on the east coast of China where I did blend in, actually kind of amazing, never once when interacting with the everyday locals felt any different treatment. Obviously am a foreigner but am curious if such a place exists in Thailand or if it's spoilt.

Also not to bash Thai people, I have met and continue to meet and hope to meet more Thais I do like and respect. The question is: where?

[squarethecircle]

"If you want to blend in why are you here? Seriously this is the East not the west, I wonder do you Treat Asians in your country the same as Locals?

You need to be thinking Big city like Bangkok if you want to Blend "

I like living in a different paradigm/mental space/atmosphere/whatever you want to call it, like visiting Mars except a 12 hour flight away, but don't like being treated differently due to being an obvious "foreigner". And Bangkok is not the answer, definitely did not feel blended in there. And yes I do treat People-from-the-East who have settled in my own country the same as locals, in fact they are locals as I come from an immigration country.

Edited July 13, 2014 by squarethecircle

[MJP]

"Seems to be like a thread to become negative about Thai people.

To answer your question......alone in your hotelroom. You should be fine there. "

Hey, you must be a psychic. Just took a walk outside and found a bunch of drunk youngsters and did not feel safe.

But to be more clear: I have found 1 city on the east coast of China where I did blend in, actually kind of amazing, never once when interacting with the everyday locals felt any different treatment. Obviously am a foreigner but am curious if such a place exists in Thailand or if it's spoilt.

Also not to bash Thai people, I have met and continue to meet and hope to meet more Thais I do like and respect. The question is: where?

Which city in China?

I do know what you mean. The constant "You, you!!" and "Farang!" can seriously get you-you down. When I travel back I go straight home to the village and there's no "farang, you-you!!!" Tend to avoid travelling about the place these days to be honest.

Have to say Roi-Et is a nice city. Very pleasant, dignified place.

[squarethecircle]

"Which city in China?"

Hangzhou, I was basically a white face in a sea of Chinese people but strangely was just another face in the crowd. An hour-long bullet train up to Shanghai and all of a sudden it's "Laowai!" everywhere you go. Wuhan is another place with good people (but more than a tad dirty), Beijing and Shanghai not so much.

OK cheers for the Roi Et tip, some Isaan friends took me in the countryside outside of there a couple years back, seems nice.

Edited July 13, 2014 by squarethecircle

[WhamBam]

Never had a problem in Cha-Am but it is quiet there. A lot of older folk who like to sleep before 10 p.m.

I do see where you are coming from though and have found some of the smaller cities (larger towns) do not seem to be too bad.

[raymp]

Yes, Phrapradaeng, apart from the odd school teacher I am the only farang there.

The locals treat me like a local.

[rhodie]

"Which city in China?"

Hangzhou, I was basically a white face in a sea of Chinese people but strangely was just another face in the crowd. An hour-long bullet train up to Shanghai and all of a sudden it's "Laowai!" everywhere you go. Wuhan is another place with good people (but more than a tad dirty), Beijing and Shanghai not so much.

OK cheers for the Roi Et tip, some Isaan friends took me in the countryside outside of there a couple years back, seems nice.

Hangzhou is a very nice city, but it is full of tourists. Maybe not too many Western tourists, but full of Chinese tourists and that may have something to do with it.

Maybe Koh Samet would be the same but most of the Bangkok tourists are weekenders.

I wish you luck.

[MJP]

^^ Samet's the worst!

[KarenBravo]

Treated like a local?

Never happen. You not only look different, but you probably can't speak the language. Why should the locals treat you as one of them?

[JLCrab]

The goal IMHO is not to blend in but to be left alone.

Edited July 13, 2014 by JLCrab

[BudRight]

It's only a minority that treat me like a circus freak. Tuk-tuk drivers are infamous for this.

Try Aranyapratet - it's a really nice place.

Edited July 13, 2014 by BudRight

[96tehtarp]

"(up in the far North) and find people distinctly less friendly and sense a bit of anti-f*rang sentiment."

"I'd really like to find a little pocket in Thailand where I feel like a local. "

These pockets are everywhere and often where you would least expect to find them.

They can be found in Bangkok, Pattaya, Phuket, Samui as easily as anywhere else. My success in finding these "pockets" increased a lot when I stopped thinking of pockets as places and started thinking of them as pockets or clusters of people. I started making Thai friends.

As my social network with Thai people grew, I became more confident in my farang-ness, and my hide got much thicker. A thick skin goes a long way to desensitizing oneself from the unpleasantness of anti-farang sentiment which can be found anywhere, unfortunately.

I don't think you will find the place you are looking for, but you can definitely find people.

"(1) heavy tourist trail scattered all over the country, where less-friendly locals seem to congregate (and probably have bad attitudes due to bad tourists),"

Often this is true. Locals get jaded. Tourists do as well. Expats are the best I know at congregating and complaining and moaning, sharing stories about how horrible Thai people are, about how they've been scammed, and cheated by ex-wives and girlfriends. I suspect most have extremely limited social networks here.

"(2) expats marrying locals, I'm afraid this has given us f-rangs a reputation as golden tickets and whore-mongers"

I'm not really sure about that one. People all over the world and from every culture get married for the same varied reasons. Thai people are very open minded about inter cultural marriages.

"(3) lack of quality education. "

If you consider OE "Overseas Experience" as a type of education then yes. Most Thai people have never had any experience overseas and don't have any hopes of ever having one due to the cost and visa restrictions. They cannot navigate a world map and they don't care. Why bother?

Look at yourself in the mirror. You are a "Gweilo", (a ghost-face). You look different, the sounds that come out of your mouth are alien, you eat cheese and bacon, you even smell different.

The Thai immigration sticker inside my passport which is there to remind me of my next 90 day report starts out like this;

"The ALIEN permitted to stay..."

So that's us, we are Alien's who are permitted to stay. Deal with it and move on. Make more Thai friends.

Edited July 14, 2014 by 96tehtarp

[kannot]

Maybe with some Thai people who have travelled to other parts of the world.... but then again I knew a Thai who spent her childhood in New Zealand and through to University who now lives here ( Thailand) who reverts to Thai traits on this matter.

The vast majority have been brainwashed at birth onwards, witness small kids shout "falang" when you are out.

[Urloc]

I must be lucky, but I never felt like treated any different, but I must say I live in a small village in the Isaan area. The question is, do you act like a local?

- Can you speak their language?

- Do you do what they do? This means, do you go to the temple for example, can sit as they do and tried to understand their uses?

- Do you look down to them even if you dont notice?

- Do you eat their food? Can you sit in the floor with a group of Thais and eat normally as they do?

- Do you, for example, lower your head when you cross people?

- Do you stop walking when the anthem plays?

- Do you know how to properly handle a picture of HM The King of Thailand? Even it is just a calendar?

If you can do these, or most of them, after they know you they will treat like a local.

[simon43]

Don't assume that locals saying 'You, you' or 'You 15 baht' etc are intentionally being rude or abrupt.

They are simply repeating in English what they would say in Thai when addressing someone ==> 'Khun'

The problem is that 'khun' means both 'you' and a polite form of addressing someone (rather like saying 'Mr .... or Mrs ......'.

Unfortunately, when repeated in English, it sounds rude to our ears.

Educated Thais would have learnt to say 'Sir' or 'Madam', but those lacking in this knowledge will simply translate 'Khun' into English and not realize that it sounds rude.

I correct many Thais who address me like this (I'm great fun at parties....)

[sdanielmcev]

Learn the language and customs. Unless you're going to be reincarnated real soon, you are different. I don't understand why that would bother anybody. Not knocking you, but you seem to want people to adapt to you, rather than adapting to your surroundings.

And btw, if little kids pointing and shouting 'farang' at you bothers you, you really need some backbone.

[1BADDAT]

You expect all "civilized" people to accept you as one of their own. I think most would agree that Europe is a civilized part of the world and if I went there I would be classified as an "American" and as a whole would not be treated as I was a local person.

I am not from the "if you don't like it go home" crowd, but I think it is a pretty lofty goal to try and find a demographic area where all people are accepting.

[Eliot Rosewater]

If you want to blend in why are you here? Seriously this is the East not the west, I wonder do you Treat Asians in your country the same as Locals?

You need to be thinking Big city like Bangkok if you want to Blend

Where I'm from we treat asians the same as we treat anyone else

Remind me not to visit where you're from....

Sent from my GT-I9300T using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

That's very PC of you, but it is a very generous positive view of human traits. Keep it real

Its as real as it gets; in my home community asians certainly are treated the same as everyone else. We have a large community of many ethnic groups.

You calling that "PC" and a "generous positive view" is just ridiculous and silly and leaves me with the idea that your family and neighbors are horrible people and treat Asians badly.

Wake up and smell the coffee

[Berkshire]

If the OP is serious about just blending in, how about Chiang Mai? There's enough farangs running around in CM that the locals don't think twice about seeing foreigners. And it's not nearly as mercenary as places like Pattaya or Phuket,

But then there are farangs who complain about being ignored in places like Chiang Mai. Seems they were expecting to be treated "special" and didn't just want to be ordinary. The Thais just can't win with some farangs.

[squarethecircle]

The goal IMHO is not to blend in but to be left alone.

That's exactly what I mean...seems like a few of you if you get what I'm asking about.

Urloc: "The question is, do you act like a local?"

No I will not "go native" as you describe but do act respectfully, when people wai me I don't wai back but instead bow like a Japanese, responding in my own way.

96tehtarp:

"You are a "Gweilo", (a ghost-face). You look different, the sounds that come out of your mouth are alien, you eat cheese and bacon, you even smell different. So that's us, we are Alien's who are permitted to stay. Deal with it and move on."

We have a radically different worldview, I consider wherever my feet rest on this planet as home, however temporary. And "gweilo" is a nasty term: treating people on the basis of their race rather than their character (who they are on the inside) is unethical and immoral IMO. "You even smell different": wow. "Thai people are very open minded about inter cultural marriages." Especially when there is gold involved.

[robblok]

Don't assume that locals saying 'You, you' or 'You 15 baht' etc are intentionally being rude or abrupt.

They are simply repeating in English what they would say in Thai when addressing someone ==> 'Khun'

The problem is that 'khun' means both 'you' and a polite form of addressing someone (rather like saying 'Mr .... or Mrs ......'.

Unfortunately, when repeated in English, it sounds rude to our ears.

Educated Thais would have learnt to say 'Sir' or 'Madam', but those lacking in this knowledge will simply translate 'Khun' into English and not realize that it sounds rude.

I correct many Thais who address me like this (I'm great fun at parties....)

Agreed.. its certainly is not always about being rude its about limited language skills and still wanting to bring a message across.

Sure some are rude.

Here in Bangyai Nothaburi I get treated fairly similar to the locals. I do speak a bit of Thai and that seems to help a lot.

I once had the you you farang thing and the guy was only trying to help as i dropped my key. But yes it sounds rude and some of them are rude but certainly not all.

[Tony Aparichio]

Treated like a local?

Never happen. You not only look different, but you probably can't speak the language. Why should the locals treat you as one of them?

Rather than treated like a local how about treated like one of "Us".

Whatever language you speak, whatever colour your skin, tall or short

if you go to a classical music performance as the first violin; you "ARE on of Us".

If you go to an advanced medical research institution

and you have advanced medical research to offer,,,,,,,"Welcome Home Brother"

On the other hand if you dont eat som tam and yer chief claim to fame is drinking beer,

Your name is not Brad Pit and you cant speak fluent Thai.

Dont expect to be treated like you arte Brad Pitt.

Find Your own Crowd

Bad Tony

[squarethecircle]

Roi Et, Cha-Am, Phrapradaeng, Aranyapratet, Bangyai Nothaburi

OK that's a good start, I appreciate your help. Glad to see that not all f*rangs in Thailand are losers and jerks!

[spidermike007]

I think you will never feel like an insider, or "one of them" here. It is part of the experience. I do not think this is the place to live, if you have a yearning to be one of them, or to be fully accepted into the local society. I just think it is too insular a place for that. But, why the need? Many of us are happy living here, and being outsiders. I do not expect to ever be able to blend in. I suppose it would help to be fluent, or nearly fluent in Thai. That I am not. Part of the reason I am here is the strangeness of it all. The NPF (non predictability factor). Back in the states I could predict my entire day, and rarely would anything, or anyone surprise me, especially when it came to the natives. Not the case here. Every day is different, and sometimes bizarre and unpredictable. Personally, I love all strangeness. The fact that the people do not embrace me as one of their own is simply not an issue. I do not make it an issue. I find most people here to be kind, friendly enough, helpful and cheerful. Granted, I have few real friendships with Thai men, and that is a bit of an issue for me, but something I can live with, as I have a lot of expat friends here. As far as being called a farang, I could care less. Means nothing to me, except a description. I do not take it as an insult, which I do not think it is. It is just a reference, that is meaningless to me.