help ! marriage divorce don't have a clue what to do

[flyfrog]

Sorry to hear. This would be my biggest fear. I know another guy who was supposed to get 1/2 of a house he bought and he'd even bought a 30 lease on the land. But that did him no good when he went back and some Thais promised to kill him if he ever came around again.

If you can afford it, I'd just walk. Life is short enough and I hate court fights. Somehow I get bigger and better emotionally when I just walk from something rather than get into a protracted hassle. At least I know who the better man is.

I sincerely hope you can afford to put it behind you and get on with your life.

Others may disagree with me and tell you to fight it. Up to you. I wouldn't.

If you can prove that the money for the investments comes from you, obviously NOT from her, get a good lawyer, you should get back 50%!

[HUAHIN62]

If you weren't a troll I may have given you advice. If you are American and you can't write a sentence in proper English the US education system is as bad as the Thai one. The post look like a Thai trolling farangs.

That's pretty cruel. Many, many Americans aren't native English speakers. I run into them every day.

I think being the grammar police is obnoxious.

Is it cruel to be neither gentle, nor supportive? Not everything deserves gentle, unqualified support. He's right, a Thai trolling farangs would look like this.

If criticizing somebodys language automatically equates to being grammar police then its never reasonable to criticize anyone and we end up encouraging each other to use less and less brain with every lazy keystroke Really? there is no minimum standard we can reasonably expect people will at least want to achieve? if your typing your comments in a blinding hurry becuz you're ship is sinking okay but if you are sitting at a keyboard digesting you lunch is it too much to expect someone with opposable thumbs to put SOME—just some—effort in?

If he isn't a native English speaker he may have worked much harder on his post than you did, speaking of effort.

But being grammar police is rude, counter productive, and disruptive of the flow. It's also off-topic and trolling, and bashing another poster by this board's rules definitions.

The thing that bothers me most it that it's just plainly mean.

I am also not a native English speaker and was not playing grammar police, I was trying to make the point that his post looked like a Thai trolling us. There is another person that tracked his previous posts on the same subject which suggest that he either don't want to take advice or is a troll.

[ravip]

I am sadly thinking how one could possibly get in to such a quagmire.

Really, is it possible?

Edit

Trolls - they kind of make life lighter...

[khunpa]

I lost my life savings, .... over 9,000,000 baht doing the same thing. Luckily no kids were involved. You can get a good lawyer and fight her for half, but it will be a long drawn out procedure. They do things like set a court date, to set a court date. you spend the time and money to go and nothing happens!

Where is the house built? That is where you will have to go to court. ... which could put you in jeapardy if there are death threats against you. Plus the costs of going and staying there each time, ..and there will be several times! Thai Court is that way! Plus, what you paid out is not what you will realize in return. For example, .. my house was continually over budget. Supoposed to take 6 months and cost 1.5 to 2 million baht. It took 2 years and was not quite finished, when I stopped the craziness. No way it would sell for what it cost me. It is in a small village 35 kms outside Surin, so low demand.

Then there is the land issue! My house is on land owned by her mother, which added problems. AND, it was not properly registered with the Land Office so could not be transferred or sold until proper registration occured!

You will be throwing good money after bad, and probably end up with ulcers with all the stress and worry you will go through!

I am screwed. I am too old to start over ... I can not work here, (Retirement Visa prohibits working) even if there were a decent paying job to be had. My puny pension, barely pays my rent, utilities and food, but I can survive and have peace of mind, knowing I was a good person that got taken advantage of. I got a few things out of the house because I had an influential Thai friend, (in the Army) and his presence made things happen. But it was small potatoes to what I lost.

For 9 mill. THB, you could have bought a nice condo and had a new girl every night. Just had to do, what everybody said you should not do... right?

[smotherb]

its easy for a young western guy to take older clapped out woman cougar from just about anywhere for some money as they are all desperate for a cub

Newsflash! Even older farangs can get the older clapped-out cougars, but then, do you really want them?

[johnnycthedog]

well this sap came to the wrong place for help, it seems that none of the posters save a few have any positive light to shine on the problem. how could they help,...they never made a misstake. no experiance with this kind of woman. they all have susy q's at home cooking, cleaning and helping them to be the best they can. bunch a change face cork suckers

No you're wrong. He got good sound, constructive and helpful advice when he posted two months ago. He just never accepted it. Once he's stopped beating his head against the wall he can go lay on the train lines. Sometimes you just have to let go of a hopeless situation. You regroup on your own home front under circumstances you can control and get on with your life. Emotionally and financially wounded - yes. But not DEAD!!!!

After giving him what I thought was the best advice I could offer I'm tired of his bleating.

[sscsamui]

Hire a Very good attorney. This is the only way you will have a chance of anything....Sorry for your Nightmare

[saltypaul1]

ok.......I had exactly the same.....got married to a woman only 3 years younger. Bought 2 rai land , made a large bungalow, bought a new pickup and set up a shop etc etc.

We had a daughter who is now around 7. I got divorced (she only granted it ) when she was totally set up there, as long as we both agreed (which we did) it only cost about 500 baht at local amphur. Yes I had to sign and agree to lose everything so i could be rid of her once and for all after 7 years of hell.

Lies, deceipt, affairs with mant local men, family all drunks and in jail and creaming all the money secretly off me/us.

Great actors, perfect scam which all family were in on.

MATE......WALK AWAY FOR GODS SAKE COS THEY ARE ONLY MOTIVATED BY MONEY AND MONEY ONLY!!!! NOT WORT LOSING UR LIFE OVER.

I HAVE NEVER GONE BACK AND GIVEN UP CONTACTING MY DAUGHTER EVER AGAIN....ITS FOR THE BEST.

I HOPE I NEVER SEE OR HEAR FROM THEM AGAIN...YES LOS LAND OF SCAMS.

MOVE ON AND TRY RECOVER YOUR LIFE AGAIN. ITS BEEN 2 YEARS FOR ME NOW AND TRY NOT TO THINK ABOUT IT AS IT STILL HURTS BUT HEY????

IM GLAD THAT LIVING NITE MARE IS OVER.. ITS HAPPENED TO MANY PEOPLE I KNOW ALSO. HOUSES SECRETLY SOLD WHILST WORKING AWAY, BOYFRIENDS WHO ARE INTRODUCED AS BROTHER'S FRIENDS ETC ETC

[saltypaul1]

I lost my life savings, .... over 9,000,000 baht doing the same thing. Luckily no kids were involved. You can get a good lawyer and fight her for half, but it will be a long drawn out procedure. They do things like set a court date, to set a court date. you spend the time and money to go and nothing happens!

Where is the house built? That is where you will have to go to court. ... which could put you in jeapardy if there are death threats against you. Plus the costs of going and staying there each time, ..and there will be several times! Thai Court is that way! Plus, what you paid out is not what you will realize in return. For example, .. my house was continually over budget. Supoposed to take 6 months and cost 1.5 to 2 million baht. It took 2 years and was not quite finished, when I stopped the craziness. No way it would sell for what it cost me. It is in a small village 35 kms outside Surin, so low demand.

Then there is the land issue! My house is on land owned by her mother, which added problems. AND, it was not properly registered with the Land Office so could not be transferred or sold until proper registration occured!

You will be throwing good money after bad, and probably end up with ulcers with all the stress and worry you will go through!

I am screwed. I am too old to start over ... I can not work here, (Retirement Visa prohibits working) even if there were a decent paying job to be had. My puny pension, barely pays my rent, utilities and food, but I can survive and have peace of mind, knowing I was a good person that got taken advantage of. I got a few things out of the house because I had an influential Thai friend, (in the Army) and his presence made things happen. But it was small potatoes to what I lost.

For 9 mill. THB, you could have bought a nice condo and had a new girl every night. Just had to do, what everybody said you should not do... right?

I had exactly the same bought land build bungalow bought car had a daughter,,,,,setup a shop etc etc in the end none of it was ever ours/mine for retirement it was all for her and the family. Luckiy after her lies, deceipt , affairs etc etc we got divorced (only coz i had to sign it all away) i lost millions and my retirement dreams and my daughter. never go back , walk away , hope i never hear or see them ever again...scummy people. so sorry for you and all others falling foul of the land of scams. luckily i still work in middle east so can try make up for all losses. take care mate sorry very much

[Caesarillion]

Heard the Beatles song " Money can't buy me love"? How good looking is she? Keep a pictures. If a lawyer won't take it on a contingency forget it. As far as the kid goes you will have to wait. Be nice and "kill with kindness" as they say and that will be your best way, but quit being a sucker with your inheritance or whatever. Plenty of fish in the sea as they say and some Thais will treat you like a king. Others, dirt. Learn the difference and pan for gold and not dung. Also remember the world is full of this kind of grief and a good life is just avoiding it and getting over it. My brother bankrupted my mom and it killed her. Time to move on. I think things like "spray paint, hack saw" ie my work, and drink alkaline water to move on with practical things from loss and anger that I can't control. Yoga helps too. Best wishes on a long life. Karma voodoo and the wheel in the sky will handle her and her people. Namaste and Amen. Paul V Long Beach

[Grindting]

A fool and his money will soon be parted.

From the sounds of the OP (who can't add up 2 simple figures or string a legible sentence together (full stops and paragraphs exist in many languages...)) he would have been scammed wherever he went and by whomever he met.

But given the current situation, I'd recommend burning those houses you bought down (with the mother and husband/father still in it if at all possible) and immediately kidnap your son to america before anyone gets wind.

[choochoo]

Is confused american for real? smells like a troll to me, well his english is very poor so he could be that dumb.

He would have to be that dumb to get involved with such trash and spend so much money. What really bothers me is that so many stories like that happen so frequently. How do so many stupid/naive/ignorant/desperate men even live long enough to make the plane trip to here?

I dont know!

OP deserves all he is getting.............lol. ON-line virgin.............................hahahahahahaha.

[choochoo]

Wondering how someone semi-literate managed to accumulate $120,000.

No helping for any guy as daft as the OP.

(this can't be real)

maybe in college he could hit a 90mph fastball and got drafte by mlb. Then he fizzled out and came to thailand..............lol.

[choochoo]

well this sap came to the wrong place for help, it seems that none of the posters save a few have any positive light to shine on the problem. how could they help,...they never made a misstake. no experiance with this kind of woman. they all have susy q's at home cooking, cleaning and helping them to be the best they can. bunch a change face cork suckers

good girl online virgin? Who doesnt see this as a red flagg...................lol.

op being the EXcepTION.................lol.

[friendoken]

Wondering how someone semi-literate managed to accumulate $120,000.

No helping for any guy as daft as the OP.

(this can't be real)

There are many in the world with no or very little education who have gone on to be very wealthy , it is not a requirement to be well educated to succeed therefore I find your comment " Semi-literate " to be somewhat degrading , offensive , insulting.

Considering there are 7 billion people on this planet, and you claim there are many with no or very little education who have gone on to be very wealthy, I feel free in assuming you will have no difficulty in providing us with a list of, say, 25 people.

As to the OP. I can't see any other way than to cut your losses and run. She's tried to have you killed before, it's entirely likely she'll try again. If you fight her in court, there is no guarantee you'll win. The chance of getting killed is probably higher than winning a court battle. You made a huge mistake and got taken. I hope you didn't get taken for everything you had.

[choochoo]

kenny rogers said you got to know when to fold em.

after 9,000,000(is that what it is?) i think its time to folde em..................lol.

Golden rule of thai. Dont get involved with issan wimmin. Go for the 1o-16 middle class thai chinese looking for a dingy farang..........lol.

Im at a total loss at whats so attractive about girls respectable thai mans dont want.

[rascalman]

All I can is to say how sad I am for you! Must have been thinking with the wrong head? Divorce now cut you losses and leave now!

[NeverSure]

I am also not a native English speaker and was not playing grammar police, I was trying to make the point that his post looked like a Thai trolling us. There is another person that tracked his previous posts on the same subject which suggest that he either don't want to take advice or is a troll.

Why don't you work on your own English grammar before you criticize some else? It sucks.

[NeverSure]

Considering there are 7 billion people on this planet, and you claim there are many with no or very little education who have gone on to be very wealthy, I feel free in assuming you will have no difficulty in providing us with a list of, say, 25 people.

snip

Here's a list of just the 31 billionaires. LINK

Here's a list of the top 100 entrepreneurs. Andrew Carnegie was a grade school dropout. LINK

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Im at a total loss at whats so attractive about girls respectable thai mans dont want.

Respectable Thai men do want them, but only for an hour, and they don't tell their wife!

[harryfrompattaya]

Your wife is just trying to scare you. Get a good lawyer.

I do not agree in this walk a way or kill

If you have to much morals to kill then walk away

[MobileContent]

Count yourself lucky.

I met a US citizen last week at the Singapore airport who was framed by his wife and left drugs in his car. She got the factory. Two large houses on Sukhumvit and all he got was 8 years at Bangkok Hilton.

9 million Baht ? Way over the top.

BTW For all those Isaan bashers that every woman in Isaan is a bad Isaan woman for a farang. This is not correct. I have seen plenty of stable marriages with friends that are married to Isaan woman's and I would take an Isaan woman before I take a Chinese chick from Bangkok.

The point is you have to pick carefully and learn how to understand the family.

BTW The OP was scrwed by a girl not from Isaan. I had a PM from him and they are just outside of Bangkok (1 1/2 hours).

Don't think only Isaan has farmers

[inzman]

So this is the latest, "got scammed by a Thai girl story" never ends. Kinda bored to read these anymore. A fool and his money are soon parted.

[confused american 48]

to them guys who like to run there mouth you should not talk about others you do not know if your head was hit smashed and you was left for dead and then run over again i wonder how you and what you would remember and the 120k is not a lot of money i have done recovering my life and i am taking some of the advice from some of the nice people on here and will do what i have to know but thailand will not control my life as it once did when you do like some one told me just stop worry about the money its gone any how just pick your butt up go again it all going to work out i trust in god and i have built race care and show cars my whole life

[confused american 48]

i agree to what the guys say we need to learn to understand thai people thai ways and know what is said and be able to read what we sign so we don't get screwed i went in with open heart mind and my heart i was not looking for crooks i talked every day for a whole year video to her to her family before i ever went to thailand i was sold a five year college virgin but two years latter her little sister that looks just just like her was her daughter no virgin but she still won't admit it but strech marks th enipple it tell different but i was married before i touched mine had been there blowed a ton doing the crazy thai engagement parties we had three of each all ways over 300 people if i was to start all over i would do what i am doing right now i bought a cross country truck and i work when i want travel when i want i have to watch my money now i still got a small retirement from the railroad but its not enough to go play and have fun but every guy needs to live in thailand at least one to two years and spend at least a year with in person everyday not internet to get to know there girl because my ex thai family could act so so so good for 30 days at a time it was the times over 30 to 60 you catch the real family and the 90 day trips you see the truth but it was to late by then your left broke and a passport full of thai stamps 1 year visa stamp its sad but i ok now i try to take my time get it right i got a new sweet heart and she is not thai and i thank god day i have a real lady now to love to each is there own but never judge any one you don't really know ----- i personally went through mortal hell there was forced to give away so so much money just to leave there i scared of thai ways

[confused american 48]

i did at first have a very nice guy try to help me write this stuff because my brain does not remember how to do that the only thing i do with out thinking is still build cars and breath everything else i do is work its not be lazy its a brain injury from being all most killed in the land of smiles --- but there is some really nice thais if not i would not be here right now i was left for dead by my own family

[Grindting]

.

Im at a total loss at whats so attractive about girls respectable thai mans dont want.

The farang with these type of girls are not respectable.

The kind of Thais that do get involved with these women are usually taxi/tuktuk drivers, bottom level criminals or just general bottom feeders, and the reason is that these women bring in the bacon! So the said men do not have to get off their ars3

[arthurwait]

Wondering how someone semi-literate managed to accumulate $120,000.

No helping for any guy as daft as the OP.

(this can't be real)

Richard branson is dislexic.

[Tony125]

Wondering how someone semi-literate managed to accumulate $120,000.

No helping for any guy as daft as the OP.

(this can't be real)

You shouldn't slag off someone whose first language is not English. There are many people out there that are completly illiterate and are multi-millionaires:

The man who invented the "Cats Eyes" used on the roads worldwide was completely illiterate and became a multi-millionaire.

Andreas Panayiotou, a London real estate tycoon worth £400 million (roughly $650 million), lives on a 20-acre estate and owns several private jets. At just 45, he’s come from humble beginnings as the son of Greek immigrants and is now ranked as the 200th richest man in Britain. And he can’t read.

You wrote "You shouldn't slag off someone whose first language is not English. There are many people out there that are completly illiterate and are multi-millionaires:" Thats true also those that are not native english speakers that immigrated to USA, Britain or Aus and do not speak English well but are not stupid. But you have to read between the lines in these posts. This guy says he met her online came over she wasn't a virgin as he said, saw she had a lot of previous BF's and then spent $60,000 USD on engagement and a further $80,000 USD on the wedding ! Thats what makes him stupid plus that adds up to (60+80) $140,000 USD not $120, 000 that he stated he spent. Also in another post he said he spent $200,000 USD so a lot of things don't add up.. Also wether you have a lot of money or not if a guy comes over to Thailand and just hands over money to some bar girl or even Hi-so girl and says here honey go buy us a house ,set up a business, buy land and does not get a lawyer/realestate agent to check out the paperwork he is stupid or a fool. You would not give money to some girl in your own country and say here buy us a house/business without checking paperwork so why would you do that here in Thailand?. Too lazy to learn language, get lawyer, trust some girl you really don't know?

[Tony125]

Wondering how someone semi-literate managed to accumulate $120,000.

No helping for any guy as daft as the OP.

(this can't be real)

You shouldn't slag off someone whose first language is not English. There are many people out there that are completly illiterate and are multi-millionaires:

The man who invented the "Cats Eyes" used on the roads worldwide was completely illiterate and became a multi-millionaire.

Andreas Panayiotou, a London real estate tycoon worth £400 million (roughly $650 million), lives on a 20-acre estate and owns several private jets. At just 45, he’s come from humble beginnings as the son of Greek immigrants and is now ranked as the 200th richest man in Britain. And he can’t read.

You wrote "You shouldn't slag off someone whose first language is not English. There are many people out there that are completly illiterate and are multi-millionaires:" Thats true also those that are not native english speakers that immigrated to USA, Britain or Aus and do not speak English well but are not stupid. But you have to read between the lines in these posts. This guy says he met her online came over she wasn't a virgin as he said, saw she had a lot of previous BF's and then spent $60,000 USD on engagement and a further $80,000 USD on the wedding ! Thats what makes him stupid plus that adds up to (60+80) $140,000 USD not $120, 000 that he stated he spent. Also in another post he said he spent $200,000 USD so a lot of things don't add up.. Also wether you have a lot of money or not if a guy comes over to Thailand and just hands over money to some bar girl or even Hi-so girl and says here honey go buy us a house ,set up a business, buy land and does not get a lawyer/realestate agent to check out the paperwork he is stupid or a fool. You would not give money to some girl in your own country and say here buy us a house/business without checking paperwork so why would you do that here in Thailand?. Too lazy to learn language, get lawyer, trust some girl you really don't know?