Did i break the law? (defamation/cheating girl)

[ClutchClark]

Thought you were just "doing the honest thing"?

Sounds a bit more like just "doing the vindictive payback thing".

Good luck sorting it out.

[konying]

OP, i know you only 25 and believe you know best, but a number of people told you not to go because if you used any logic or common sense you would understand that police does not summon anyone via email in any country of the world.

She called your bluff and won. Good on ya for listening and taking advice. Sorry but now you on your own.

For future references if you want to get back at your future cheating GF, just sleep with one or all of her friends, this way not only you get back at her, but also have fun while doing it.

Edited November 11, 2014 by konying

[AnotherOneAmerican]

OP, i know you only 25 and believe you know best, but a number of people told you not to go because if you used any logic or common sense you would understand that police does not summon anyone via email in any country of the world.

She called your bluff and won. Good on ya for listening and taking advice. Sorry but now you on your own.

For future references if you want to get back at your future cheating GF, just sleep with one or all of her friends, this way not only you get back at her, but also have fun while doing it.

Yep, she probably didn't even know his name, "farang write bad thing about me", he goes along to the police and admits everything with his real name, address and a copy of his passport.

If the police came for him,

"it wasn't me", "I didn't write that", and finally "your translation is wrong, it doesn't say that", never, ever volunteer any information to the police in any country.

Notifications of legal action by email, change email address, never access that account again.

Notifications of legal action by post, move house, leave no forwarding address.

Notifications of legal action by process servers, "are you Mr. $%^&", answer NO then walk away.

This isn't rocket science.

@konying,

And her mother and sisters.

Edited November 11, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[RolandRat]

[razorramone]

To clarify: No I did not recieve any official police summons. Nor did I get anything last night when I went to the police station. The email was from HER, not from the police, telling me to come. And at the police station a guy just confirmed there was an appointment.

I deleted the facebook posts a day after making them, they are long gone, but not before she printed them out. You can call me vindictive or childish, but I met this girls friends, family, all to find out she has a long term boyfriend elsewhere? I'm not just going to take it and move on, like a b..ch.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

To clarify: No I did not recieve any official police summons. Nor did I get anything last night when I went to the police station. The email was from HER, not from the police, telling me to come. And at the police station a guy just confirmed there was an appointment.

I deleted the facebook posts a day after making them, they are long gone, but not before she printed them out. You can call me vindictive or childish, but I met this girls friends, family, all to find out she has a long term boyfriend elsewhere? I'm not just going to take it and move on, like a b..ch.

I think most of us are calling you stupid.

Before you went to the police station, nobody knew who you were, now the police have full details.

Every attractive uni girl has many bfs, usually 3-5 all giving her money, that's how they pay for uni.

And yes, her family and friends are all in on it too.

Thailand is the country of f&^% around. No monogamy here.

Edited November 11, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[dotpoom]

"I thought I was just doing the honest thing."....Is it not nearer the truth to say you had a huge resentment against her and wanted to get your own back and make life difficult for her. Sometimes we try to hide things we do under the pretense that "it is for their good" ie,...her BF/Husband back home.....when the real motive is not so "noble".

[jacko45k]

Sorry to tell you OP.

Defamation in Thailand has little to do with it being the truth.

Just loss of face.

Nevertheless an email from her is not the way the police would summon you to the station. I think this may be an attempt to get money out of you.

I believe she would need to engage a lawyer and make a civil complaint, in which case you would receive official paperwork from the court.

Check with a lawyer maybe as I am not one..

Edited November 11, 2014 by jacko45k

[technologybytes]

I hope that 30 grand is in baht and not dollars or euros...

Young girls often tend to have more than one boyfriend, but so what. I'm assuming you didn't marry the girl or make any serious long time commitment to her, it's up to her how many boyfriends she has.

[draftvader]

Engage a lawyer (not too expensive if nothing happens) just to get a legal address. Ask her to have her lawyer contact your lawyer to discuss the summons. If this is a bluff you'll hear no more....through "legal" channels anyway. If you are not going to play ball and you don't know this person that well then a move is definitely on the cards. NEVER bring playthings home unless you know them very well and believe you can commit (or you drive them and use THE most convoluted route in and out). That should be a global rule.....

[bushwacker]

Too many mistakes for example:

1. Lend her money (30,000B), give your head a shake. Have you learned nothing from this website?

2. Assumed she was true. Have you learned nothing from this website?

3. Getting upset when you found out she was not. Have you learned nothing from this website?

4. Posting on her FB page. You are making stupid people look like geniuses. Why would you do that? And why would her friends really care? They are thinking ... why was she so lucky to find a stupid farang. Maybe we need to spend more time looking for idiots also.

5. Having lived here 3 years, why do you not understand or at least have a better understanding of how the Thai world works.

6. I know that you are only 25 but surely that is old enough for a little more maturity. She cheated on you. You did not see the signs. You did not look for the signs. You have been given a very important lesson. Learn from it. You actually are quite lucky and the education only cost you 30,000 b.

7. Stop trying to win. You cannot. There will be no winners. (Except maybe the police when they get their cut). Take your lesson. Smile. Learn from it and move on quickly.

I could go on but my coffee is getting cold.

Here endest the lesson.

[ScottMallon]

Move on, forget the money, and if they come after you, then you know it's real. Otherwise, forget her. Putting that sort of info on Facebook is juvenile at best, there are plenty of decent women here but you can't be focused on one that is running around behind your back.

[pigeonjake]

many are saying the silly part of this, is this and that,,

THE SILLY PART OF THIS IS A GROWN MAN RUNNING TO FACEBOOK,,, what is the world coming to,

you say you have been here for 3 years,,, come on grow up,, you new these things happen,,

next time dont go running to facebook,,,,

ring your mum

[razorramone]

/\ /\ /\ I wanted to tell her boyfriend what she had been doing. I obviously didnt have his number nor did i want to see him.

To clarify: No I did not recieve any official police summons. Nor did I get anything last night when I went to the police station. The email was from HER, not from the police, telling me to come. And at the police station a guy just confirmed there was an appointment.

I deleted the facebook posts a day after making them, they are long gone, but not before she printed them out. You can call me vindictive or childish, but I met this girls friends, family, all to find out she has a long term boyfriend elsewhere? I'm not just going to take it and move on, like a b..ch.

I think most of us are calling you stupid.

Before you went to the police station, nobody knew who you were, now the police have full details.

Every attractive uni girl has many bfs, usually 3-5 all giving her money, that's how they pay for uni.

And yes, her family and friends are all in on it too.

Thailand is the country of f&^% around. No monogamy here.

She already had my address, or at least knew where I lived. The police didnt even take any details from me, I just came in, had a broken thai conversation asking about a meeting, and left. I cant believe im having to deal with this crap over a few angry facebook messages. Does this mean people can just sleep and scam their way around thailand, and nobody is allowed to tell other people about it?

Also yes yes, I know im guillible for giving her money. I thought she was honest because she's only 19, she's a student, I met all her family, and I didnt meet her in a bar or club.

I thought all the scammers lurked around nana. I'll know to be more careful in the future.

Edited November 11, 2014 by razorramone

[daveAustin]

Mirroring much of what has been said; nope, I would not go to the police station at the say-so of some guilty tart in a hissy fit. Yes, those sad defamation laws are very real here and you probably crossed the line, but that's up for the courts to decide, not the police and certainly not her. She may take it further and get lawyers involved and whatnot (if she can afford it), but personally I'd prefer that route than be dictated to by some gold-digging minx demanding money at the cop-shop. When in Rome... deny, deny deny! Denying posting it, deny it means what they think it means, deny you have knowledge of a boyfriend, and absolutely under no circumstances ever wai her. Grow them taters, ole mate.

[philw]

The exact same thing cost a friend of mine 100,000 baht and forced him to leave town.

(Down from an initially asked 300,000)

You are in breach of the computer crimes act and depending on the mood of the cops involved, could have a serious problem.

Get a lawyer now and negotiate this away.

Be prepared to pay.

Sorry to be blunt but this could be a serious problem.

Negotiate.

[philw]

/\ /\ /\ I wanted to tell her boyfriend what she had been doing. I obviously didnt have his number nor did i want to see him.

To clarify: No I did not recieve any official police summons. Nor did I get anything last night when I went to the police station. The email was from HER, not from the police, telling me to come. And at the police station a guy just confirmed there was an appointment.

I deleted the facebook posts a day after making them, they are long gone, but not before she printed them out. You can call me vindictive or childish, but I met this girls friends, family, all to find out she has a long term boyfriend elsewhere? I'm not just going to take it and move on, like a b..ch.

I think most of us are calling you stupid.

Before you went to the police station, nobody knew who you were, now the police have full details.

Every attractive uni girl has many bfs, usually 3-5 all giving her money, that's how they pay for uni.

And yes, her family and friends are all in on it too.

Thailand is the country of f&^% around. No monogamy here.

She already had my address, or at least knew where I lived. The police didnt even take any details from me, I just came in, had a broken thai conversation asking about a meeting, and left. I cant believe im having to deal with this crap over a few angry facebook messages. Does this mean people can just sleep and scam their way around thailand, and nobody is allowed to tell other people about it?

Yes.

[rondii]

Why did you do that, mate? I think it's well known these girls all have a Thai guy in their back pocket and at least two of us on the go until one of em commits.

Anyway, I don't know if the police are taking her seriously or if you've committed any crime. But if they are and if you did, then they would not necessarily come looking for you. An arranged meeting is easier after all. Let's just hope they're really cops and not a couple guys waiting to sack ya. As a matter of fact, I might just skip that meeting all together and let the money go. The cops are probably gonna want some of that cash anyway, but I doubt they'll issue a warrant for some FB nonsense.

What a load of drivel from a complete fool and obvious racist.

To generalize that all Thai women who have a farang husband or boyfriend are cheating and have other 'boyfriend is not only absurd and an insult to the thousands of Thai women and farang men in long loving and monogamous relationships.

U are gutter trash.

[bkkgooner]

Defamation law is fairly serious stuff in Thailand and the fact that your girlfriend went to the police shows that she is either pretty intelligent and not to be <deleted> with or she is getting advice from someone rather intelligent and who knows the law

Don't go to the police station because if you do then one of two things will happen

1) Police suggest you pay the girl a sum of money as compensation to avoid court

2) You get offended at the suggestion of this and the process towards a court case is underway

My advice would be to change your phone number, considering switching to a new place and don't go near police stations. The Thai police force is not exactly very professional and I can't imagine they will be devoting much manpower to and look for you based around an accusation of defamation.

[recycler]

So out of curiousity and not wanting to wait till thursday, I took a taxi to the station just now. I didnt get much out of them... just a confirmation to come back thursday to 'talk' with the girl, me, an officer, and her.

Now looking at these posts talking about defamation is illegal here, even if its true. If there was a criminal charge they would have had me there, right?

You shot yourself in the foot by going there and confirming that you received her message as a summon to appear. Are you this eager to join a scheme to extract more money from you by her, her Thai boyfriend and the police.

Next lesson is that you should forget about the money you gave her voluntarily it is gone, there are no feathers on a bold chicken!

[KIWIBATCH]

...ignore the slag........you won't get any money back.......move address...change telephone number....move on.....next

[PaulHamon]

Get a lawyer and have them contact to police.

[MediaWatcher]

Thai at Heart, on 11 Nov 2014 - 03:03, said:

Yes you have defamed someone and unfortunately for you, it is easily traceable to your facebook. I would delete all records of the Facebook account instantly, and clear all the caches of it in your computers.

At least you would have a chance of claiming it wasn't you.

Facebook does NOT give your private details, unless you have been silly enough to make them public. the op can change his phone number and if possible his address.. They do not have passport number, so the op can "hide," himself. Next time, don't be such a fool, use a fake Facebook account.

[jacksam]

Not sure about Thailand but in some jurisdictions truth is not an absolute defense, often public interest is required too. If you can demonstrate that she scammed you (e.g. convinced you she was loyal to you in order to get money from you) then you should also file a report for this - this is fraud and she can be compelled by law to repay any money that can be proven. This in conjunction with your evidence should also be a sufficient defense against her defamation suit (i.e. you're trying to protect others from her scam).

Blah blah blah.....where in hells name did you dream this up. OP ignore the "meeting with police" that is more rubbish. You won't get your lent money back....so forget it. Do not go to a lawyer... Silly idea.

Walk away. Cancel your Facebook cell number etc. Move on young fella ...

Also never stuff about with social media. Walk away.

[BORRISGOODENUF]

YOU MAY BE ABOUT TO PART WITH SEVERAL THOUSAND BAHT.

I WOULD NOT ATTEND..

[Gecko123]

I had an old girl friend who managed to get herself accused of slandering another woman, so I've been dragged through the process you are going through.

If your girlfriend is intent on prosecuting you or getting money out of you, she is probably going to have the police refer the slander (minpramat) charge against you to the prosecutor for criminal prosecution. Defamation is both a criminal and civil complaint in Thailand.

Thai Penal Code:

Section 330 In case of defamation, if the person prosecuted for defamation can prove that the imputation made by him is true, he shall not be punished. But he shall not be allowed to prove if such imputation concerns personal matters, and such proof will not be benefit to the public.

I doubt you have a solid defense against the defamation charge. If you receive notice that charges are being pressed, I recommend you cooperate to resolve. If you have an outstanding warrant against you, I imagine this would be caught be immigration either the next time you attempt to renew your visa, or when you attempt to leave the country. In the case of my former girlfriend, the police only investigated, they didn't try to negotiate payment of damages or a fine. After they gathered both sides of the story, they filed the paperwork with the prosecutor. I have a feeling that that's what might be happening in your case as well.

The criminal case isn't really the problem. The fine will probably be small. The problem is that if you plead guilty to the criminal charges, your girlfriend can file a civil defamation claim against you as well. This could get expensive. If you agree to give your ex-girlfriend money in exchange for dropping charges, make sure the agreement covers both criminal and civil damages.

In the case of my former girlfriend, on my advice she plead not guilty, because there was only one person my girlfriend talked to, so it boiled down to a 'he said, she said' situation, and the prosecutor decided not to prosecute.

PS: Your girlfriend is not that likely to file a civil lawsuit for the simple reason that she is going to have to hire an attorney and it's time consuming. On the other hand, according to Thai law, you have definitely caused injury to her reputation, and she has a legal right (if not moral right as well) to collect damages. I would try to resolve by showing contrition and offering a small token of money (perhaps incorporating loan forgiveness into the negotiation.)

Edited November 11, 2014 by Gecko123

[meatboy]

a good atractive uni girl are in big demand,so if you had sex 30times you had value for your money.

so move on and find another one.

[StefanBBK]

Just don't go unless you get an official "invite".

[PaulHamon]

To clarify: No I did not recieve any official police summons. Nor did I get anything last night when I went to the police station. The email was from HER, not from the police, telling me to come. And at the police station a guy just confirmed there was an appointment.

I deleted the facebook posts a day after making them, they are long gone, but not before she printed them out. You can call me vindictive or childish, but I met this girls friends, family, all to find out she has a long term boyfriend elsewhere? I'm not just going to take it and move on, like a b..ch.

With FIREBUG (browser addon) I can make a webpage say anything I like and print it out... so they can very easily be fake.

I've attached two files (look inside the red box section), one before (unedited), one after (edited)... any 15yo playing on the internet can do it.

it takes only as long as it takes to type the words.

it never happened and cannot be proved, if you deleted the posts.

[umbanda]

If you didn't received any letter or a visit from the Police, just take a short trip out the town keeping the hotel and tickets receipts. If when you are back is not a Police note in your door, forget all about. But....to move soon after may be a good advice. She may have friends willing to make you to have a bad time, and hope that she do not know your workplace. Be careful about you do with your passport. If you really have to go to the Police station, bring just a copy, and have a Thai lawyer with you.