Is violence more common in same-sex relationships?

[isanbirder]

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-29994648

Not in mine it isn't! But then I'm not American, and the study took place in the US.

The study suggests that being part of a minority creates additional stress.

[ProThaiExpat]

The cited article does not indicate what sexes are involved. Women abuse on women has an entirely different dynamic than man on man abuse. Likewise in opposite sex relationships there is the man vs. woman or vice versa dynamic.

In all my years in Los Angeles, the only same sex abuse I ever became aware of was woman on woman abuse.

However, different regions might affect the statistics as well. Dealing with your environment in New York City has to be more stressful that Palm Springs.

With same sex marriage reaching epic proportions, the freedom to walk away is not quite as defusing if your legally tangled up with your partner. Thus more stress.

I am not persuaded by the article but agree with OP that his theme that as a member of a minority, additional stress is present, especially if the abuser is in the closet.

[Strangebrew]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

[crab]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

[MILT]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Why not post? Does one have to be gay to post on the this subject?

Not my cup of tea either but I have numerous friends that are gay here and back

in the states.

[sfbandung]

It is interesting. I had only ever thought of it as a hetero thing and almost always man on woman with the woman being the victim. Same sex relationships have the same potential for possessiveness and jealousy I suppose, perhaps more so.

[attrayant]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Why not post?

What's the point of opening up a thread to which you don't know the answer or have no opinion only to say "I don't know"? There are a million threads you could open up and post "I don't know".

When you have nothing to say, that's what you should say.

Edited November 20, 2014 by attrayant

[forumuser10]

It is interesting. I had only ever thought of it as a hetero thing and almost always man on woman with the woman being the victim.

You think the way, unfortunately, most Westerners think. And this is because most media in the west have portrayed it this way.

It does not mean it is correct.

In fact, it is totally wrong.

Many studies suggests, that in a heterosexual relationship, it is almost 50/50, when it comes to violence against women, vs violence against males. With a slight percentage suggesting women are in fact more prone to physically attack a man, than the other way around.

Male violence towards females tend to result in more serious injuries though, simply because they are usually stronger.

In same sex relationships, I remember reading that violence is far more common, both in women/women relationships and male/male relationships in comparison to heterosexual relationships.

[animatic]

It is interesting. I had only ever thought of it as a hetero thing and almost always man on woman with the woman being the victim.

You think the way, unfortunately, most Westerners think. And this is because most media in the west have portrayed it this way.

It does not mean it is correct.

In fact, it is totally wrong.

Many studies suggests, that in a heterosexual relationship, it is almost 50/50, when it comes to violence against women, vs violence against males. With a slight percentage suggesting women are in fact more prone to physically attack a man, than the other way around.

Male violence towards females tend to result in more serious injuries though, simply because they are usually stronger.

In same sex relationships, I remember reading that violence is far more common, both in women/women relationships and male/male relationships in comparison to heterosexual relationships.

Women are allowed to hit men, and culturally there is no severe punishment,

while men are enjoined completely from striking women, even in some eyes as self defense.

Thus some women will use violence to vent their feelings, figuring the men don't dare strike back.

While there are certainly violent men who beat women, and they deserve no leniency for their actions,

there are also those who get caught defending themselves, and are tarred with the brush of woman beater, abuser.

I have seen this in the flesh, a man who had to strike a woman trying to slash his throat,

because he had no choice but to disarm her, and then got locked up for weeks for

'beating a woman. Witnesses later verified, that he was using necessary force in self defense.

But before that, he took a severe beating in jail, after the woman's friend blindly

screamed in rage at him on a jail visit, the sole reason for the visit being to scream at him.

Others heard her 'accusations' and believed them, so applied jailhouse justice.

Finally the truth came out , the women backed off, the accuser apologized in court, etc.

But too little too late. Lost his job, his reputation and almost his eye sight in one eye,

simply because a drunk woman got violent he defend himself,

and all assumed he was the violent one.

So I tend to reserve judgement till facts are clear.

.

[Benmart]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Why not post?

What's the point of opening up a thread to which you don't know the answer or have no opinion only to say "I don't know"? There are a million threads you could open up and post "I don't know".

When you have nothing to say, that's what you should say.

When nothing to "say", another option is to remain "silent".

[vogie]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

You say it best, when you say nothing at all

[moojar]

Here in Sydney, the main gay area is Darlinghurst. That is known colloquially as 'Darling it hurts', so I suppose there is same sex violence.

[Scott]

One post that is essentially anti-gay has been removed. This type of post is not permitted in the gay forum. Please don't criticize other posters. You are free to ignore them.

My experience is that there is certainly violence in same sex relationships, but how much of a difference, I don't know.

I think the more testosterone involved, the more likely there is to be violence.

[ableguy]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Because he does not give a damn same as me. Get it.

[saakura]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Because he does not give a damn same as me. Get it.

If this is a veiled attack on gays, i think you guys need to change your attitude.

[sustento]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Because he does not give a damn same as me. Get it.

So why post?

[balo]

In Thailand this problem is easy to solve, the more money the farang got to spend on his partner , less fights there will be in the relationship. And no, it doesn't matter if its a gay or straight relationship.

Edited November 20, 2014 by balo

[Goldieinkathu]

Not in mine either.

Been together for 10 years and will have been in a CP for 8 years tomorrow, we've never had a big argument let alone a physical fight.

Seen and heard many in homes nearby, all straight couples, but I don't think it's got anything to do with sexuality. Financial problems, language barriers, general stresses and strains of every day life more like.

"Love does not hurt" -Yvette Cade.

[mrdome]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Why not post? Does one have to be gay to post on the this subject?

Not my cup of tea either but I have numerous friends that are gay here and back

in the states.

Because it adds ZERO to the discussion, looks like a put down and nobody wants to read those types of posts (except yourself, we get that).

Imagine if everyone did this and one would have to wade through hundreds of those "wouldn't know/not for me" posts to find a post worthwhile reading!

[ggt]

By all mean...let's do all we can to keep the same-sex lifestyle on the front burner...

[vogie]

Wouldn't know Not my cup of tea.

So why post?

Because he does not give a damn same as me. Get it.

So why post?

Attention seeker?

[sustento]

By all mean...let's do all we can to keep the same-sex lifestyle on the front burner...

This is the gay forum...

[isanbirder]

By all mean...let's do all we can to keep the same-sex lifestyle on the front burner...

This is the gay forum...

Thanks for reassuring me, Sustento. I thought I'd strayed on to the wrong forum ..... and I started this thread!

[forumuser10]

It is interesting. I had only ever thought of it as a hetero thing and almost always man on woman with the woman being the victim.

You think the way, unfortunately, most Westerners think. And this is because most media in the west have portrayed it this way.

It does not mean it is correct.

In fact, it is totally wrong.

Many studies suggests, that in a heterosexual relationship, it is almost 50/50, when it comes to violence against women, vs violence against males. With a slight percentage suggesting women are in fact more prone to physically attack a man, than the other way around.

Male violence towards females tend to result in more serious injuries though, simply because they are usually stronger.

In same sex relationships, I remember reading that violence is far more common, both in women/women relationships and male/male relationships in comparison to heterosexual relationships.

Women are allowed to hit men, and culturally there is no severe punishment,

while men are enjoined completely from striking women, even in some eyes as self defense.

Thus some women will use violence to vent their feelings, figuring the men don't dare strike back.

While there are certainly violent men who beat women, and they deserve no leniency for their actions,

there are also those who get caught defending themselves, and are tarred with the brush of woman beater, abuser.

I have seen this in the flesh, a man who had to strike a woman trying to slash his throat,

because he had no choice but to disarm her, and then got locked up for weeks for

'beating a woman. Witnesses later verified, that he was using necessary force in self defense.

But before that, he took a severe beating in jail, after the woman's friend blindly

screamed in rage at him on a jail visit, the sole reason for the visit being to scream at him.

Others heard her 'accusations' and believed them, so applied jailhouse justice.

Finally the truth came out , the women backed off, the accuser apologized in court, etc.

But too little too late. Lost his job, his reputation and almost his eye sight in one eye,

simply because a drunk woman got violent he defend himself,

and all assumed he was the violent one.

So I tend to reserve judgement till facts are clear.

.

Yes, I know this from first hand experience as well. The woman attacking the male, and the male inevitably must disarm the women, and automatically, we (well not me, but 90% of society) all assume the women was the victim and the male was the aggressor.

[BritManToo]

Violence is endemic in heterosexual relationships in Thailand.

In a Thai/Thai relationship, the man or woman can initiate the violence.

In a Thai/foreigner relationship it appears more usual for the Thai to do the bashing.

I suspect the same for gay relationships.

[sustento]

Violence is endemic in heterosexual relationships in Thailand.

In a Thai/Thai relationship, the man or woman can initiate the violence.

In a Thai/foreigner relationship it appears more usual for the Thai to do the bashing.

Do you have any evidence for these assertions?

[BritManToo]

Me

Two long term relationships with Thai ladies, they both hit me as much as they thought they could get away with and waved knives.

Pals (in CM)

Fairly similar experiences, not only fists but knives too.

One murdered (verdict hit and run by unknown person), one attempted murder victim (tuk tuk hired to run him down), one crippled for life (gf ran him off his m/c on Hang Dong rd).

Thai neighbours

I've often heard the screaming and whacking sounds, sometimes the girls hitting, sometimes the guys hitting.

Edited November 21, 2014 by BritManToo