Defining success as an expat

[AnotherOneAmerican]

When I go around in Pattaya I will often meet those groups of ladies, most of the time 3 or 4 midgets together with a good looking lady with here nose in the wind, and when you are " interested" in the good looking one, the others will jump in right away with the words " she my friend,she's beautiful, she has car".

So it is obvious that in the eyes of the other girls she has made it, been successful.

I never considered an ex-pat successful because he could afford a 15 year old Corolla.

News Flash,

The midgets are women, the tall "good looking lady" is a man wearing a dress.

Edited December 30, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[StreetCowboy]

Very very few farangs in Thailand are immigrants, if your on an annual visa/extension your not an immigrant, "immigrant" infers right of abode, which on a visa,/extension you don't have right of abode

The only real immigrant's in Thailand among the farang community are those who have PR

The rest of us are merely transients

illegal immigrants are immigrants whether they have right of abode or not.

[StreetCowboy]

Defining success as an expat

why would success "as an expat" be different from the success of a non-expat? are different yardsticks used to measure success?

I think darts players and plumbers have different criteria for success. Personally, as a cyclist, and as an engineer, I don't have a "success" bar that I feel I have to flop over. Nor as a baldie, or an expat, or a buffoon, or any other of the descriptors that could be applied to me.

That said, I can see great benefit in defining as successful some criteria that others fail to meet, so that I can look down on my fellows and enhance my self esteem.

Many years ago, when I was much younger than I am today, I thought to myself "I wish I was like him", but I was wrong; I didn't wish that, or I would have worked like him and danced like him... I wished I could have what he had. But I would rather be myself, and do what I do, rather than trying to be someone else.

SC

[sdanielmcev]

Building a place for yourself within the local community.

Having a working knowledge of the Thai language.

Having friends, both Thai and western, you could count on in times of trouble and being a friend to others who are in trouble.

Having adequate financial resources to draw upon in a crisis.

Taking care of your health.

Having fun and discovering something unexpected every day.

Being independent and knowing how to take care of your financial, medical, visa and daily shopping needs without having to rely on another individual.

*******

I'll undoubtedly think of more.

That's average, not successful.

Quite a few expats can't check all the boxes on this list.

What's the point of having a lot of money if you don't have friends, someone you can count on in a crisis, poor health, or are unable to resolve a problem at the bank or internet provider without having a guide along with you.

I didn't say anything about money.

[sdanielmcev]

what is success ?

good weather, good food, good pussy ?

enough money not to worry about the bills or even old age ?

Watched a film on sat TV years ago just to pass time. Song started and didn't pay too mutch attention. Eventually listend to the words. Basically all a man needed in life. Choirs went "loose shoes tight pussy and a warm place to s**t"

.

From the movie "Loose Shoes." You have the first two backwards.

[whiteman]

After living here on a retirement visa with my Thai partner and still having enough money to see me living a quite and happy but nice life style that will last me eg dollars till the day I pass from this world is for me success

[redandyellow]

Building a place for yourself within the local community.

Having a working knowledge of the Thai language.

Having friends, both Thai and western, you could count on in times of trouble and being a friend to others who are in trouble.

Having adequate financial resources to draw upon in a crisis.

Taking care of your health.

Having fun and discovering something unexpected every day.

Being independent and knowing how to take care of your financial, medical, visa and daily shopping needs without having to rely on another individual.

*******

I'll undoubtedly think of more.

Well stated Nancy, at some point I wanted to stay in Thailand permanently, but I find the best of both worlds in Canada and Thailand ( now that I think with my big head more often than not ) - that prevents me from staying in the Kingdom full time as an expat

[Big Daddy]

Successful in what? Retirement? I would say a fair number of expats in Thailand are retirees, many of whom have already made their success. Now they're probably thinking about getting to do more of what they what, when they want, rather than be strapped with the idea they need to strive for success. Cruise control is a better mode any day over the rat race of climbing some ladder. Thinking about success is not a high priority in my future.

Edited December 30, 2014 by Big Daddy

[redandyellow]

Regarding 2 of my expat friends in Thailand,

#1. The Phuket expat I alluded to in the post - in his 60's - he was a deep sea diver, has a 4 million baht house in Phuket town and rents out a condo at Kamala beach. He ain't rich, but does fine. He drinks 3-4 beer a day but never more, as he can maintain, but needs to unwind every day at 6 pm after another hard day in Thailand ( his words)..

But when pressed, he admits its a bit better than being in England - he can't return there anyway, no property left, relatives elsewhere..He still likes looking at the women..(Thai, not British )

He used to be a player, but stopped several years ago, he says if he got caught his wife would kick him out (the house and condo are in her name - don't ask me why he didn't put the condo in his own name..), and he no longer fools around.. ( plus he's getting old.. )

#2. The other guy is a former British soldier in the Faulklands war - early 50's - he and his English wife developed a hotel in Thailand and are very successful - with a 30 year lease - a "mystery" Thai as the nominee

He always has a few Thai ladies here and there, but his wife is okay with that, as she has Thai gf's.. They too packed up and left England - with nothing to return to.

Only #1 regrets packing up and having no options left - not having a condo or a room in England, as he'd dearly love a several month break from Thailand - #2 is happy as Larry

[redandyellow]

Agree that NancyL has a good starting list.

We can meet most of that list now apart from taking care of the health of my partner (who is the thai) but the thai system which she is eligible for could not meet the cost of her medical needs that keeps her living the normal healthy life that she does lead, here in the western world with that huge cost met by our government. The longest she can spend in Thailand is four months.

For me and the one that keeps me at about 4 months per year and I would add to that list of NancyL is tolerance for everything thai around you. And that is where I fail as I can only tolerate the incompetence, laziness, corruption, cheating, bull crap, lies, etc. for so long before I need to come back to a normal world. Thats why Thailand is a great place for us to visit or live for 3 or 4 months but beyond that it does our heads in.

It also does my pocketbook in - with the amount of Thai relatives I inherited in 2008

Signed

the 3-4 month rule of thumb

Also Signed,

2 big suitcases for presents for the 20 plus relatives, one small one for clothes

[redandyellow]

Success is not getting drunk before 11.am and not having killed the mrs

Or you getting up at 11 am - after a "well-deserved" late night on Bangla Road - or Walking Street, and not having the Mrs kill you..

Because Getting home at 4:59 in the morning ain't a good thing..I know..

[redandyellow]

One man's "success" could be another man's "failure".

Especially for long time expats that decided to finally start being 100% faithful to their Thai wives..

signed

to save their peckers

[wow64]

As an Expat I will define it for you;

success

səkˈsɛs/

noun

1.

the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.

"the president had some success in restoring confidence"

synonyms: favourable outcome, successfulness, favourable result, successful outcome, positive result, victory, triumph

"we are very encouraged by the success of the scheme"

antonyms: failure

the attainment of fame, wealth, or social status.

"the success of his play"

synonyms: prosperity, prosperousness, successfulness, affluence, wealth, riches, fortune, opulence, luxury, comfort, life of ease, the good life, milk and honey

"the modern-day trappings of success"

a person or thing that achieves desired aims or attains fame, wealth, etc.

"to judge from league tables, the school is a success"

synonyms: triumph, bestseller, box-office success, sell-out, coup, master stroke; More

2.

archaic

the good or bad outcome of an undertaking.

"the good or ill success of their maritime enterprises"

Sent from my c64

[smotherb]

Success,could surely only be defined by the particular person,if they consider themselves a success,surely then they are.

Interesting concept. I had a couple of drinks tonight with a old acquaintance. He was drunk on his posterior and claimed to be happy and a success. The man has a small pension--maybe B40k/mo--which he spends on rent, utilities, street food and booze. He hasn't bought a new pair of shoes or a shirt, or shorts in years. He rarely bathes or shaves. He told me he is happy in his life. So, I guess that makes him a success--in his own mind anyway.

[smotherb]

My GF gave me 1000 baht last night and said, "Sometimes i pay the electricity bill and sometimes you pay".

TOP THAT!

Mine gives me B1000 every time we have sex.

[Datebayo]

Define a ''bolt hole''

Google told me this:

bolthole

ˈbəʊlthəʊl/

noun

noun: bolt-hole

1. 1.

   a place where a person can escape and hide.

   "he thought of Antwerp as a possible bolthole"
2. 2.

   BRITISH

   a hole or burrow by which a rabbit or other wild animal can escape.

1. From who do you want to hide or escape from?

2. Are you a rabbit or some wild animal?.

Edited December 30, 2014 by Datebayo

[SpokaneAl]

A number of posts in this discussion seem to revolve around a definition of success based on the fact that older guys are able to sleep with young, beautiful Thai women, including a comment that they are living the life many other men can only dream about.

I guess I am getting old because that is not my definition of success. Of course there are places in Thailand where one can go and buy any young lady that they desire. To me that seems more of a purchase/sale agreement than success.

In my old age I admire beautiful women as much as the next guy, but now tend to look at them from a grandfather or older uncle perspective. I want to be able to engage in intelligent conversations with my mate. Speaking in broken English is no longer enough for me.

I met my wife at Korat back in 1972. I like the fact that after 40 plus years together my wife and I have a bond and a trust that goes deep and each of us is the one person in the world that the other can absolutely count on no matter what.

I am getting bald and old and my skin is beginning to sag and the pounds seem to be sticking a bit more, and much of the same applies to my wife. I like the idea of growing old together. It is a good life and not one that I would wish to change.

We spend half of each year here in Thailand and the other in our home back in the US. We are both retired and happy to be finished with the rat race of work.

We enjoy life and many of the things that seemed so important a few decades back are not now. We are more accepting and appreciative and look forward to each day, even if it is boring to others. We see no need to worry about impressing others and are comfortable in our own skins. We are best friends, and love our Thai family and our son back in the states dearly.

That is success to me.

Edited December 30, 2014 by SpokaneAl

[catman20]

be finically secure. healthy being single with no kids at 50 or 60 years of age and having as little to do with thai people as possible

[sdanielmcev]

A number of posts in this discussion seem to revolve around a definition of success based on the fact that older guys are able to sleep with young, beautiful Thai women, including a comment that they are living the life many other men can only dream about.

I guess I am getting old because that is not my definition of success. Of course there are places in Thailand where one can go and buy any young lady that they desire. To me that seems more of a purchase/sale agreement than success.

In my old age I admire beautiful women as much as the next guy, but now tend to look at them from a grandfather or older uncle perspective. I want to be able to engage in intelligent conversations with my mate. Speaking in broken English is no longer enough for me.

I met my wife at Korat back in 1972. I like the fact that after 40 plus years together my wife and I have a bond and a trust that goes deep and each of us is the one person in the world that the other can absolutely count on no matter what.

I am getting bald and old and my skin is beginning to sag and the pounds seem to be sticking a bit more, and much of the same applies to my wife. I like the idea of growing old together. It is a good life and not one that I would wish to change.

We spend half of each year here in Thailand and the other in our home back in the US. We are both retired and happy to be finished with the rat race of work.

We enjoy life and many of the things that seemed so important a few decades back are not now. We are more accepting and appreciative and look forward to each day, even if it is boring to others. We see no need to worry about impressing others and are comfortable in our own skins. We are best friends, and love our Thai family and our son back in the states dearly.

That is success to me.

Yes. That is success. Hat's off to you and your Mrs.

[Berkshire]

be finically secure. healthy being single with no kids at 50 or 60 years of age and having as little to do with thai people as possible

If you wanted as little to do with Thai people as possible, wouldn't it be much easier to do that anywhere else in the world besides Thailand? Lots of Thais in Thailand, no? Do you also require assistance when urinating?

[Benmart]

For me...being Happy, Joyeous and Free.

[kennyro]

A person is a success if they get up in the morning and gets to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. Bob Dylan

[Naam]

be finically secure. healthy being single with no kids at 50 or 60 years of age and having as little to do with thai people as possible

If you wanted as little to do with Thai people as possible, wouldn't it be much easier to do that anywhere else in the world besides Thailand? Lots of Thais in Thailand, no? Do you also require assistance when urinating?

is the assistance of Thai people required to urinate?

[Naam]

My GF gave me 1000 baht last night and said, "Sometimes i pay the electricity bill and sometimes you pay".

TOP THAT!

Mine gives me B1000 every time we have sex.

cash or promissory note?

[StreetCowboy]

My GF gave me 1000 baht last night and said, "Sometimes i pay the electricity bill and sometimes you pay".

TOP THAT!

Mine gives me B1000 every time we have sex.

cash or promissory note?

I expect he's hoping to find out soon...

[Ace of Pop]

Never being dragged to Tesco Lotus.

[Soutpeel]

My GF gave me 1000 baht last night and said, "Sometimes i pay the electricity bill and sometimes you pay".

TOP THAT!

Mine gives me B1000 every time we have sex.

To hurry up ?

[tookwan cottage]

To me success means to be happy in your new environment.

Thailand is beautiful, that's for sure, but as I already wrote in some other thread, I am not quite happy here, because Thailand is more for old, retired expat community, not for young expats.

Unlucky. If you can't enjoy the Kingdom as a young expat, especially if you have financial connections to the West, then you are most likely mediocre. Not you, per say, just the vast majority.

[Soutpeel]

To me success means to be happy in your new environment.

Thailand is beautiful, that's for sure, but as I already wrote in some other thread, I am not quite happy here, because Thailand is more for old, retired expat community, not for young expats.

Unlucky. If you can't enjoy the Kingdom as a young expat, especially if you have financial connections to the West, then you are most likely mediocre. Not you, per say, just the vast majority.

What do you mean by financial connections to the west ? You mean they are digital pikeys ?

[tookwan cottage]

To me success means to be happy in your new environment.

Thailand is beautiful, that's for sure, but as I already wrote in some other thread, I am not quite happy here, because Thailand is more for old, retired expat community, not for young expats.

Unlucky. If you can't enjoy the Kingdom as a young expat, especially if you have financial connections to the West, then you are most likely mediocre. Not you, per say, just the vast majority.

What do you mean by financial connections to the west ? You mean they are digital pikeys ?

No, I mean the mediocre and gormless who continue to recycle "jokes" that became old very quickly after never being humorous in the first place, and therefore spend the vast majority of their time on an insipid discussion forum to reassure the uncaring public that they are "so happy". When, in actual fact, they barely spend time away from their tech devices because it would require a process of introspection that terrifies them for what it would reveal: they are in fact completely miserable with the vapid urges that they are chained to, as well as the people who they are either married, attracted or related to who can't stand them, and merely tolerate them for material gain.