Anybody who never had kids regret it ? I'm still on time but is having kids in Thailand a good idea?

[thefactoryoutlet]

Hello,

I wonder if anyone who never had kids regret it ?

I have no interest and even worst in Thailand when I see how many luxury cars will cost me their education :-)

Please, find someone who never had kids and regret it ? And actually, why any regret when it is so easy to have ? Just do it at any age ! You won't be here to know their future anyway !

This is a serious question, as I feel weird not to be like most of the people who find interest in having kids and spending time and money for them ! Actually I think that most don't even think and just do what society and culture want them to do ! Just like Thai who marry because this is not socially acceptable to stay with a boyfriend and not being married...

Thank you for your replies.

[krisb]

Whatever.

[mrtoad]

Up to you. Who cares?

[rabid old goat]

wouldnt say regret, but sometimes wonder how it would be otherwise, that is until you have to spend any length anywhere near them. screaming damn brats!

[Lucifer]

My children are the best thing that ever happened to me.

[geronimo]

I've never regretted bringing the four humans I did into this world. Yet, having said that, there are far too many of us, nearly nine billion. We all need food clothing / shelter, the list goes on. Humans have been raping this planet for a long time, but only since the industrial revolution have we had the ability to upset nature.

Adopt a baby if you really want kids, a much better idea.

[rabid old goat]

Adopt a baby if you really want kids, a much better idea.

or you could try to break into fort knox and steal the contents it would probably be more easily attainable.

[Neeranam]

It's hard to imagine life without kids but one thing I know is that I'd probably not be still married if we hadn't had them ut was the reason we got married in the first place.

They are a lot more expensive that I had thought, especially t aged 12, all the bs with paying tea money to get into a good school, fashionable clothes/phones etc. A trip home cost nearly 200k in flights alone now.

Rather have kids in Thailand than the UK.

[i claudius]

If you are a decent person and bring your kids up right then they more than likely will turn out well and not be "screaming little brats " as someone called them ,i am not saying that i am the most decent person in the world ,but my children ,one born here and who lived in the UK for many years and the other born and raised in the UK have turned out a credit to me and my wives, i am so lucky to have them.

Edited January 30, 2015 by i claudius

[kannot]

aged 51 never had any, I dont miss them but am thinking about having one soon, looks like it will have to be IVF which probably means more than one as Wife is 38.

As someone already said........waaaaaaaaay too many people

[Laughing Gravy]

Whilst I happy for those who have children and have and still enjoy the experience, I would like to redress the balance. I have never regretted not having children. In fact I am happy being an uncle and God father etc. Having my own, has never been a priority. I believe some people should not be parents and feel sorry for those that should and can't have children. The world is overly populated, so having children should be a very careful decision, as I firmly believe that having children, you should give 100% towards their development for the rest of their lives.

So the answer is no regrets at all.

[Chuckles78]

I never thought i would have until i turned 35. I also liked the flexibility to do whatever i wanted and when.

Saying that my son is now nearly two years old and i could have never thought he would bring so much joy into my life. More than money could buy. Its hard to explain but experiencing your little loved one learning to crawl, to walk, saying the first word, running to mama or papa for a cuddle or protection when scared. Glad i got him.

[nottocus]

Got to experience both worlds.

42 years without one and being single.

Now married with a nipper and hopefully experience another 42 years like this.

[richard_smith237]

I'm sat here reading this next to my 1 year old who's snoozing on the sofa...

Soon he'll wake and I'll take him for a swim...

Children aren't for everyone - but I find that hard to understand

He just woke up, looked at me and smiled...

[RickyJB]

i do have regrets , but as many other people , ive lived a life to the full, that has had no time for kids...when i moved to Thailand , i started to chill out a bit and decided maybe time to settle down , start a family... a couple of years ago i did start seeing a girl in Phuket, and she did have a child, but after many arguements and many bad things said to each other , and a greedy demand for some crazy amount of money, she disappeared with the child...ive seen him one time in the 1 year and 2 months since he was born...the kid is mine, but it feels like i dont have any kids...

[Bangkokhatter]

I was quite happy in the never having children brigade, but all that is gonna change later this year as me and the wife have our first. Still feel a bit apprehensive about the whole thing to be honest, but most of that is thinking about the future cost. Have been a long time being able to do as i wish regarding travel, partners and my social life and have generally led a selfish life.

All that has to change and I am looking to the change in lifestyle, swapping beered up weekends for sleepless nights and nappie changing.....must be bloody mad

[Swiss1960]

First child was an "accident" (to stupid to think about protection..), second child was then planned... and today, I agree with Lucifer that the kids are the best thing that happened in my life and I am tremendously proud to have them and absolutely lucky that they love me back for what I have given to them.

Having said that... I will not have more in my future, as the freedom I now enjoy is very valuable for me.

[richard_smith237]

I was quite happy in the never having children brigade, but all that is gonna change later this year as me and the wife have our first. Still feel a bit apprehensive about the whole thing to be honest, but most of that is thinking about the future cost. Have been a long time being able to do as i wish regarding travel, partners and my social life and have generally led a selfish life.

All that has to change and I am looking to the change in lifestyle, swapping beered up weekends for sleepless nights and nappie changing.....must be bloody mad

I've found it not to be a complete 'lifestyle swap'...

I've slowed down a bit, I still play Golf and Football, I still go out with friends a couple of times per week - I just don't drink to the extent that I used to because generally I wish to be active with my son the following day... Alternatively a mid morning swim works well for a hangover.

We still go out for dinner 2-3 times per week, at first the little fella would get passed around friends, then fall asleep in the pushchair.. now at 1 year old he sits in a high chair (not all places have a high chair we generally take our own 'booster)... he'll sit quite happily in that and feed while we do (We won't let him walk around the restaurant), he's also easily occupied with an iPad while we eat and chat... once he starts to get a little bored or irritable its time to go home. If out with friends my wife will take him back and I'll stay out, otherwise we'll both head back home together.

This year we've travelled quite a lot... UK 3 times to visit family, also holidays in New Zealand and Australia... We won't have time when he's at school so we figured we'd get that out of the way while we can - All trips were a little more difficult with an infant, but not overwhelming.. The major difference is how much we now travel with - its insane!

Our son was fine in a Motorhome for a month in NZ, he's fine getting driven around all day with enough stops... We still did Bungee jumps, skydives, jet boats etc it just took a little more time while we took it in turns and did what they call a 'baby-swap'.... we trekked with him on a 'back pack'... we did everything we wanted to.. even taking him on a tiny plane...

He's been in excellent restaurants with us and sits quite quietly... he's also been on beach side stalls (with a mossy net and repellant)....

In summary - Our lifestyle hasn't dramatically altered, we've made slight modifications; such as, instead of going for a relaxing massage I took him to a play area !!!...

That said, once school years roll on a lot will have to change....

Oh Nappy Changing: That really is the bad part - People always said 'Its different when its your own'.... Well let me tell you... No it isn't, I retch and chunder and generally make such a meal of it its become my Wife's task...

Edited January 30, 2015 by richard_smith237

[fey]

don't have any (i know about)

kids over here is not an option for me. just too many things to worry about (visa, language, traveling around) to make it feasible.

[bdenner]

There is no greater thrill than seeing your offspring grow and mature into fine young adults, AND it gets better when you become a grandfather. BUT in saying that I/we decided that I get 'Snipped' after our second (by my Farang wife). My Thai wife, being younger, wanted a baby by me - that was not going to happen. She already had a daughter whom I have adopted (5 at the time and now approaching 20), educated and love as much as my own. Life with GOOD kids is a joy!

[Gecko123]

They say that man has an instinctive drive to produce offspring, but I have never felt the urge to have my own children.

I have always felt a strong desire to be a parent however, to have a positive impact on the next generation.

I have been helping raise my 16 year old step-daughter since she was 5. I get a lot of satisfaction from it, and we have a good father-daughter bond.

To be honest, though, it's probably not the same as if she were my own flesh and blood, but that's OK, because if she was my own flesh and blood, we'd probably be fighting like cats and dogs, or having a typical dysfunctional parent child relationship, if you know what I mean.

Not having any kids at all (no kids, no step-kids) would be OK. You'd miss out on graduation, wedding, grand kids, maybe no one to help out when you're really old, but there are no guarantees in life, and no matter what you do there's always trade-offs.

Also agree with all those who pointed out that there are too many people on the planet already. People who don't have kids ought to be better appreciated than they are, and there ought to be more social safety nets to care for elderly people who don't have children to look after them.

Interesting topic, OP.

[WhamBam]

I had one son in the UK. No regrets at that time.

Almost had one in Thailand. Thai Baht resolved that problem.

Now? I am having a vasectomy before I come back to Thailand. Problem solved

[Lucifer]

Its wonderful to see some people ending their gene pool for the betterment of human kind.

[evadgib]

My children are the best thing that ever happened to me.

...for me it was the divorce that got me here in the first place

[LuckyLew]

Most people who do not have kids don;t have them for selfish reasons

They prefer the freedom and the ability to do what they want when they want

Being a parent is not for everyone

I suggest you keep wearing a helmet

[umbanda]

Kids are wonderful..until.

When they are babies or very small, kids are so cute and tender that you want to "eat" them.. When they become teenagers.. you will regret that you didn't eat them. .....

I am kidding now..but really is not an easy time.

I do not know why my parents didn't "eat" me...I was a cute child...but a "pain on the but" teenager. Really bad! I even cannot deal with myself.

Growing up, I was not very sure in having a family...took me some time.

Now I have two wonderful married daughters, and a very cute granddaughter..but I also know that I got very lucky. I still very bad!

Edited January 30, 2015 by umbanda

[Crazy chef 1]

I was quite happy in the never having children brigade, but all that is gonna change later this year as me and the wife have our first. Still feel a bit apprehensive about the whole thing to be honest, but most of that is thinking about the future cost. Have been a long time being able to do as i wish regarding travel, partners and my social life and have generally led a selfish life.

All that has to change and I am looking to the change in lifestyle, swapping beered up weekends for sleepless nights and nappie changing.....must be bloody mad

had the same worries mate...now junior is almost two months old and is quiet a cool chap...sure life has changed...some beers less,some fags less...lil bit more for nappies and milk..but priorities are changing...

good advise: if you have more than one bedroom let mum and the baby sleep in one and you use the other one...need my sleep because i still have to work...off days different story..enjoy it

[willyumiii]

Such a vague question, and interestingly written too!

My honest answer is that I am sure many have children and regret ti, and many never regret it at all.

A Vague question gets a vague answer!

I never got married until I was 50 years old and had my first child at 55.

I did enjoy 50 years as a batchlor.

But now....

I could not be happier!

But who knows what the future holds?

Regrets?

Maybe!

Who can say?

Vague enough?

[Yooyung]

I've had one child here, a son. He spent the first 2 1/2 years of his life here. We went back to Aus for 3 years so that I could finish off further study. While we were there his English obviously skyrocketed. We cam back here when he was 5 and he picked Thai up pretty much fluently within 6 months. He can now switch between Thai and English at will. He actually chooses to watch cartoons/movies in English. He is a smart little guy and I am proud of the progress he has made. He fitted back into life here very easily.......

However, for me one is enough. The wife makes noises about having another but I have put my foot down. I like the balance we have going now. I have time for my son, and time for me. I still have a good amount of freedom and I am not willing to give that up. If we had another we would have to go through the whole baby stage all over again....no thanks. My son is now showering/dressing himself etc as well as getting me a beer from the fridge. Also, as far as finances are concerned I feel comfortable with being able to give one child a good life.....any more and, I dont know. We are very comfortable as it stands at the moment. I see no reason to upset the apple cart on a romantic whim that "another one would be nice"....no, it wouldnt!!!!

No regrets for me having a child, but one is the magic number.

[sdanielmcev]

Nope.