LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I was talking with a Thai lady I know, and she was explaining to me that when her daughter posts pictures of the two of them on facebook, her daughter's friends will sometimes make comments like 'why is your mom prettier than you?' or 'your mom looks younger than you..' The daughter is 22ish, the mom is around 41. It kind of hurts the daughters feelings because the mom is still a babe, but she didn't inherit her nice looks. I have on many occasions have Thai people ask me personal/impolite questions or made comments, that I have NEVER been asked in my own country. Why is that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kannot Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Different cultures perspective of whats polite or not, excuse me whilst I gob a big greeny on the floor China for example Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kannot Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 (edited) Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? A lot of Thais I know are happy to tell you your'e fat although it doesnt appear to be meant in a bad way. Edited May 23, 2015 by kannot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 (edited) As the guy said, different cultural perspectives. How can you expect people to adhere to the rules of a culture they have never even visited? Edited May 23, 2015 by villagefarang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scully Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? Must admit it does seem harsh but some Thai's are just brutally honest, you're too fat, too skiny etc. Don't think there's any malice meant, it's just they presume you will be aware of their observation. 99% of the time you are aware and they are right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 (edited) Villagefarang, I see you still haven't cured your learning disabilities. As I gave in the example, this is a Thai woman who's daughter's feelings are being hurt.. she is the one who told me the story, and felt bad for her daughter. Edited May 23, 2015 by LarryBird Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h90 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 it is complete OK to ask someone why he is so fat, while it is rude to complain at the hotel if the service is bad.... different culture...... Had one labor here everyone called him a-uon (like fatty) I almost called him dum by mistake (blacky), lucky I did not that would be a bad insult And I stay in the sun for hours every day in the hope someone will call me a least brown.....but it doesn't work :-( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ukrules Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 They're ignorant and it's done out of malice, they intend to make her feel bad which is the motiviation for doing it in the first place. It's like young children pointing and laughing at the kid with some serious handicap / deformity, they generally won't know any better because they haven't been taught how to behave in a civilised manner at that stage in their life. If they miss this stage out they grow up to be 'the uncouth' which is what you have encountered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ukrules Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? Must admit it does seem harsh but some Thai's are just brutally honest, you're too fat, too skiny etc. Don't think there's any malice meant, it's just they presume you will be aware of their observation. 99% of the time you are aware and they are right. I wonder if they also go around being brutally honest and saying 'blue shirt' when someone wears a blue shirt or do they only do this when it comes to something which will be guaranteed to annoy someone else regardless of where they come from. I think you know the answer, they do it to annoy people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmptyHead Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? That depends on the culture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ukrules Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? That depends on the culture. Or lack of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Hill Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Villagefarang, I see you still haven't cured your learning disabilities. As I gave in the example, this is a Thai woman who's daughter's feelings are being hurt.. she is the one who told me the story, and felt bad for her daughter. Well hang on a sec. You asked a question that VF responded to. You didn't ask for a comment on the accompanying story, did you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoiBiker Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I think she's just trying to point out to you how hot she is for her age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 I love the questions with the obvious answers... Why do you live in a small apartment? I am broke. Why do you ride a motorcycle? My parents are poor. Why isn't your wife beautiful? Because I am ugly. Why do you work at 7-11? Because I have a lousy education.. Yay!! Aren't you so glad you asked??!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazy chef 1 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Villagefarang, I see you still haven't cured your learning disabilities. As I gave in the example, this is a Thai woman who's daughter's feelings are being hurt.. she is the one who told me the story, and felt bad for her daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pigeonjake Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 post some pictures and we will have a vote,,, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmptyHead Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings? That depends on the culture. Or lack of it. Is there such a thing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h90 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I love the questions with the obvious answers... Why do you live in a small apartment? I am broke. Why do you ride a motorcycle? My parents are poor. Why isn't your wife beautiful? Because I am ugly. Why do you work at 7-11? Because I have a lousy education.. Yay!! Aren't you so glad you asked??!! Why are you so fat (for farangs) Why are you so black (for Thais) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 post some pictures and we will have a vote,,, The mom is definitely hotter! You'd wreck it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmptyHead Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 ...it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryBird Posted May 23, 2015 Author Share Posted May 23, 2015 ...it? That? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hookedondhamma Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Ok, but shouldn't one be able to perceive how their words will potentially hurt someone's feelings?Must admit it does seem harsh but some Thai's are just brutally honest, you're too fat, too skiny etc. Don't think there's any malice meant, it's just they presume you will be aware of their observation. 99% of the time you are aware and they are right. I wonder if they also go around being brutally honest and saying 'blue shirt' when someone wears a blue shirt or do they only do this when it comes to something which will be guaranteed to annoy someone else regardless of where they come from. I think you know the answer, they do it to annoy people. possibly - I think it has more to do with them (not all) being quick to say what they see, eat, taste, and feel - then saying it multiple times. Kind of like an affirmation of sorts. Kind of like the topic seen on here every once in a while about a small kid pointing out that someone is a foreigner (if it isn't obvious enough already). Just a cultural thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheAppletons Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Villagefarang, I see you still haven't cured your learning disabilities. As I gave in the example, this is a Thai woman who's daughter's feelings are being hurt.. she is the one who told me the story, and felt bad for her daughter. Apparently you've missed the incongruity in starting a thread about manners and then insulting the respondents. #noselfawareness #clueless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanuk711 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 (edited) The results of a survey out a few weeks ago in Thailand said 63% of people say manners aren't as good as they used to be. The other 37% told the researcher to Fc*k off...................... Edited May 23, 2015 by sanuk711 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoiBiker Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 ...it? Very telling, isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kannot Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I love the questions with the obvious answers... Why do you live in a small apartment? I am broke. Why do you ride a motorcycle? My parents are poor. Why isn't your wife beautiful? Because I am ugly. Why do you work at 7-11? Because I have a lousy education.. Yay!! Aren't you so glad you asked??!! But sadly those answers aren't always true, I know a guy who lives in a small apartment yet he owns +40 others in Thailand running to millions and millions he just isn't interested in money and spending it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mauGR1 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 I have met many Thais who, despite not having a great education, have wonderful manners, even according to Western standards. I think the people described in the OP are just rude, even by Thai standards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weegee Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Good manners....one of the attributes of my wife, I really appreciate...No matter where we are in the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko123 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Being direct shouldn't be confused with bad manners. Is it good manners to smile and compliment someone, and then walk around the corner and rip them to shreds behind their back? Invariably, they're just telling you something you already know: the truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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