Thai "Blues"is it normal?

[n210mp]

This is not a rant more of an observation

This last few months I have had a slight dose of the Pattaya and Thailand "loss of optimism lurgy", its normally caught by listening too closely to those who have become depressed, disillusioned and sick of the unfairness, illogic, and all of the many inconsistencies of Thailand

It seems that some of my very good friends have or are going through a stage of complete disillusionment living here.

My friends are all becoming completely disenchanted with what goes on here and the impact it has on their lifestyles.

As intelligent and reasonable people they plead a good argument for leaving these shores forever, only returning for holidays and the benefits of their wives visiting relatives etc.

Their debates or arguments from a sensible and logical point of view are seemingly 100% watertight.

I am on the fence because I know from my own experience that if one is unhappy then unless you sort out the problem where you are, its highly probable that you will take your "unhappy" with you wherever you go

So my dear TV forum members how do you cope with shall we call it the "Thai blues" which if I am any judge of the human character we all go through from time to time.

What are your coping strategies or mechanisms for going through these debilitating times of negativity?

[robertthebruce]

Moving Country would be my option....

[DaddyWarbucks]

Moving Country would be my option....

or maybe just getting away from Pattaya and the other tourist traps would work.

[lostoday]

Read Thai Visa for a while and you will find so many people who are worse off then almost anyone in the world that it's got to make you think, "whew, I'm glad I'm not him!"

[eldragon]

Travel. In Thailand. Away from tourist areas. There are so many things to see. And it's one of the safest places in the world before the sun goes down (highway safety aside). Go to any ampur muang (capitol city), rent a motorcycle, and see the country a bit.

[EmptyHead]

Beer Chang Classic

McDonalds

Massage

Edited June 28, 2015 by EmptyHead

[NeverSure]

If I felt trapped in any country other than my home country I'd get the serious blues. In fact I did and I moved back to the US where I have first world cleanliness, rule of law and temperate, good weather. The most important thing to me was that in LOS I lost too much contact with life long friends and family.

I actually worry about some guys who are squeaking by on a minimal amount of money and may not have alternatives. I would go crazy. I am much happier having my nice home and real pickup and car and then traveling any time I want to wherever I want. Some guys tell me they feel they have more freedom in LOS, but I never did. Freedom to me is setting foot back onto US soil when I want to and having a right to be there, a right to own property, the rule of law and so on.

To each his own.

[robertthebruce]

Moving Country would be my option....

or maybe just getting away from Pattaya and the other tourist traps would work.

i

I don't live in Pattaya and I am not a tourist...

I could not live out in the sticks as boredom would do my head in.....

So where I live suits me......as well as where you live suits you.....

[ryanhull]

Pattaya isnt Thailand to me, I have never lived in Pattaya although visited the place a few times, I don't like it all... I wouldn't really call it 'proper Thailand'

Seems to me your friends need to experience Thailand for real and not just some scummy seedy area sat on a bar stool supping beer with bar girls, that's not a dig by the way. How about trying somewhere else out in Thailand away from the tourist zones?

I have lived in Thailand for 3 years and since moving up NE Thailand I am much more happy and relaxed with my wife and son, I don't think I could stay in Pattaya etc for more than a week, I also hate the seedy places in BKK. Up here I have met so many proper friends Thai and non Thai who are genuine.

Cheers

[willyumiii]

Yes, even Disneyland gets old after you have been on all of the rides a few times!

You can get out of "Disney Thai Land" and try experiencing the real country....

If that bores you, move on to a new amusement park...

The Philippines?.

It all depends on what you need to be happy

[NeverSure]

As they say, "Wherever you go, there you are".

[slipperylobster]

I have also come to the conclusion that it will be impossible for me to change my way of thinking, and behaving. Even if I were to become fluent in the language, I could never feel at home here. As a few people already said, best to have a way back to your homeland.

With a serendipitous (albeit small) windfall of cash infusion (hopefully tomorrow), I find it likely that I will fly to Salem, Oregon. Never been there before...but I do know there are no sales taxes in Oregon. My goal is to buy a second hand Ford Ranger Pickup, and a toy hauler/travel trailer (bare bones). I have no house or land there, anymore...but I just want to "go with the weather". There are nice locations and national parks, where I could work 20 hours a week, and get a free hookup site. Sounds fresh and clean. We are all set up here, in Thailand....and I can keep that going, as well.

Need to see if I can get my live-in gf a trourist visa. We were turned down for a fiancee visa, last year, as I had no address in the states.

I believe...keeping options open...and having positive plans...will keep you optimistic.

Edited June 28, 2015 by slipperylobster

[Thai at Heart]

Either u snap out of it, or eventually u leave. I did. Best thing I ever did

[HooHaa]

I have also come to the conclusion that it will be impossible for me to change my way of thinking, and behaving. Even if I were to become fluent in the language, I could never feel at home here. As a few people already said, best to have a way back to your homeland.

With a serendipitous (albeit small) windfall of cash infusion (hopefully tomorrow), I find it likely that I will fly to Salem, Oregon. Never been there before...but I do know there are no sales taxes in Oregon. My goal is to buy a second hand Ford Ranger Pickup, and a toy hauler/travel trailer (bare bones). I have no house or land there, anymore...but I just want to "go with the weather". There are nice locations and national parks, where I could work 20 hours a week, and get a free hookup site. Sounds fresh and clean. We are all set up here, in Thailand....and I can keep that going, as well.

Need to see if I can get my live-in gf a trourist visa. We were turned down for a fiancee visa, last year, as I had no address in the states.

I believe...keeping options open...and having positive plans...will keep you optimistic.

Excellent. Life in a trailer park sounds just the ticket.

[sdanielmcev]

Sometimes

[HeijoshinCool]

I have also come to the conclusion that it will be impossible for me to change my way of thinking, and behaving. Even if I were to become fluent in the language, I could never feel at home here. As a few people already said, best to have a way back to your homeland.

With a serendipitous (albeit small) windfall of cash infusion (hopefully tomorrow), I find it likely that I will fly to Salem, Oregon. Never been there before...but I do know there are no sales taxes in Oregon. My goal is to buy a second hand Ford Ranger Pickup, and a toy hauler/travel trailer (bare bones). I have no house or land there, anymore...but I just want to "go with the weather". There are nice locations and national parks, where I could work 20 hours a week, and get a free hookup site. Sounds fresh and clean. We are all set up here, in Thailand....and I can keep that going, as well.

Need to see if I can get my live-in gf a trourist visa. We were turned down for a fiancee visa, last year, as I had no address in the states.

I believe...keeping options open...and having positive plans...will keep you optimistic.

Excellent. Life in a trailer park sounds just the ticket.

.

Trailer park? No.

But Oregon has some stunningly beautiful RV parks.

[redandyellow]

I cope by going there less. I used to go to Thailand 5 months a year, and that wasn't enough.

Gradually you get over all of it.

This year it will be 3 months only. Moreover, my Thai wife and I decided that after this year, 8 to 10 weeks a year is plenty for us..

f she didn't have a family in Thailand, she wouldn't want to go back at all. She says it's too crowded, dirty, dangerous, etc..

I would still go though..for short time only

[HeijoshinCool]

.

What are your coping strategies or mechanisms for going through these debilitating times of negativity?

Never went through those periods, but after a very active life, I did feel I was wasting the precious time allotted each of us in very limited quantity.

So I came back. My wife joins me in August, but we will return to Thailand regularly. She has family, and there are certain things I miss.

[bendejo]

I only get these blues when I'm in a tourist area, or approached by touts. Small cities work best for me: small towns are too gossipy and a farang living among them becomes a local celebrity, not for me. The tourist thing of having people constantly solicit me, overcharge me, etc can really get on my nerves. Waiting to cross the street and having taxis stop in front of me is very annoying. Worse is when the taxis follow me, anticipating that at any moment I will turn around and hire them, well, that takes the cake. Very common in Malaysia.

I hadn't been to Pattaya in some years, thought I'd pop in to see how things have changed. Just looking out the window of the minivan, before getting to my hotel, I knew I made a mistake.

One of the great things about Bangkok is once you get away from the tourist areas it's like being in another city.

And then there's dem ol' existential blues, those days when you wonder "What am I doing with my life? Why am I here? Why didn't I marry Suzie, my childhood sweetheart? The smell of that cabbage soup turns my stomach!" etc. That can happen anytime, anywhere.

[IMA_FARANG]

I don't mean to be rude or critical but here it is.

I was originally born and lived for my first 18 years in the U.S.

I worked for nearly 45 years in almost a dozen various countries around the world. None were perfect but I enjoyed them all by learning to adjust to where I was and I learned to live with myself.

Here is the truth, if you can not live with yourself wherever you happen to be in the world you will not be happy anywhere.

Thinking there is place that will make you happy if you can't live with yourself is an illusion.

If you can't learn to be your own person and not depend on where you are to be happy you are not going to be happy.

It took me over 60 years of life to learn that..... I'm retired and pushing 69 years later this year.

Just try to remember, every day you wake up and see the sun is still shining, is a good day.

Edited June 28, 2015 by IMA_FARANG

[slipperylobster]

I have also come to the conclusion that it will be impossible for me to change my way of thinking, and behaving. Even if I were to become fluent in the language, I could never feel at home here. As a few people already said, best to have a way back to your homeland.

With a serendipitous (albeit small) windfall of cash infusion (hopefully tomorrow), I find it likely that I will fly to Salem, Oregon. Never been there before...but I do know there are no sales taxes in Oregon. My goal is to buy a second hand Ford Ranger Pickup, and a toy hauler/travel trailer (bare bones). I have no house or land there, anymore...but I just want to "go with the weather". There are nice locations and national parks, where I could work 20 hours a week, and get a free hookup site. Sounds fresh and clean. We are all set up here, in Thailand....and I can keep that going, as well.

Need to see if I can get my live-in gf a trourist visa. We were turned down for a fiancee visa, last year, as I had no address in the states.

I believe...keeping options open...and having positive plans...will keep you optimistic.

Excellent. Life in a trailer park sounds just the ticket.

Trailer Park? oops.

National parks, forests....yes sir.

These will be six month, traveling excursions. Not homesteading in a "trailer Park".

good laugh...but no thanks.

Also considering buying forested land (for parking)...and eventually building. Trailer will be temporary (cheap) way to get around and select sites that I like.

forget "the trailer park mindset"

Edited June 28, 2015 by slipperylobster

[TheAppletons]

"My friends are all becoming completely disenchanted with what goes on here and the impact it has on their lifestyles.

As intelligent and reasonable people they plead a good argument for leaving these shores forever, only returning for holidays and the benefits of their wives visiting relatives etc.

Their debates or arguments from a sensible and logical point of view are seemingly 100% watertight."

The majority of the times I get depressed in Thailand are usually after I've spent too much time reading posts on TV.....there is incessant whining and negativity on this forum about everything. "What goes on here" - whatever that means - generally has no impact whatsoever on my daily life.

Are your friends professional political protesters or something? Absolutely must be able to buy drinks between 2-5 p.m. at the store of their choosing? Constantly get suckered by jet ski operators in Phuket?

If and/or when I do leave, it will be because I'd rather be somewhere else not because "what goes on here" has an "impact" on my lifestyle.

[rayongchelsea]

I don't mean to be rude or critical but here it is.

I was originally born and lived for my first 18 years in the U.S.

I worked for nearly 45 years in almost a dozen various countries around the world. None were perfect but I enjoyed them all by learning to adjust to where I was and I learned to live with myself.

Here is the truth, if you can not live with yourself wherever you happen to be in the world you will not be happy anywhere.

Thinking there is place that will make you happy if you can't live with yourself is an illusion.

If you can't learn to be your own person and not depend on where you are to be happy you are not going to be happy.

It took me over 60 years of life to learn that..... I'm retired and pushing 69 years later this year.

Just try to remember, every day you wake up and see the sun is still shining, is a good day.

Excellent post.

[rayongchelsea]

I think anyone who lives here for any significant amount of time, wherever, will get the blues, to the d..ckheads that say Pattaya is not Thailand, yes it is, just a different shade..

[overherebc]

Every so often I go through a period, up to a couple of weeks at a time, where I hate everything about the place. Maybe this happens every two or three years. I can find fault with anything or anyone when I'm in that short period of pi--ed offness. The more often I feel like that the quicker I'm starting to recognise it and the faster it goes away.

My wife is obviously the most aware of it and can get me out of it quite quickly now, how, I'm not sure but she manages it. A couple of good friends help as well.

[Soutpeel]

None were perfect but I enjoyed them all by learning to adjust to where I was and I learned to live with myself.

And this is the key to a lot of peoples problems, they are unwilling to adjust, you see it every day on here...

Why are Thai's ?, why is Thailand not the same as farangistan ?

I do believe there are a lot of farangs who are "trapped" in Thailand, they ave thrown their lot in, for what ever reason, then realised it isn't panning out the same as the picture they had in their heads and this is reflected in some posts even seen on TV, as there is very obviously a lot of resentment or even hatred of all "Things Thai" by some posters and they live here, and one would have to ask the question, if someone hated a place so much as it appears some people do why are they still here...if it was me who flet that way, would have packed my bags and left a long time ago

[ramrod45]

After three years here, I'm packing up and returning to the US. It's not so much that I dislike Thailand, it's that there are so many more options in the US. People talk about traveling around, but really, how many rice/corn fields and small villages or temples do you want to see? There is very little geographical diversity in Thailand. I plan a multi-state motorcycle tour of the Western region of the US. I won't need a visa, no 90 day reports, the police actually "police" (I find it amusing how many people on TV say they enjoy the "laxness" of the laws and then complain the police do nothing), and I find most people to be friendly and helpful. I like streets that are wide, sidewalks I can walk on, and roads that seem infinite to ride on.

I will miss certain aspects of Thailand, but when you really look at Thailand, it's pretty scruffy. I live just outside of the moat area in Chiang Mai. Ride down the soi and you see about 5 trash dumps, not one yard that doesn't have 2 foot high weeds, a dozen holes in the road, and that pure aroma of sewage. I kind of ignore all that, after all, it's expected here, but it will not disappoint me to be where things are a little more "manicured".

I'm pretty happy wherever I am, but I've spent my time here, enjoyed it, and now I'll move on. I don't understand why some people on TV seem so "protective" of Thailand. If it works for you, fine. If not, fine, but no reason to try and push your beliefs on others.

[AYJAYDEE]

After three years here, I'm packing up and returning to the US. It's not so much that I dislike Thailand, it's that there are so many more options in the US. People talk about traveling around, but really, how many rice/corn fields and small villages or temples do you want to see? There is very little geographical diversity in Thailand. I plan a multi-state motorcycle tour of the Western region of the US. I won't need a visa, no 90 day reports, the police actually "police" (I find it amusing how many people on TV say they enjoy the "laxness" of the laws and then complain the police do nothing), and I find most people to be friendly and helpful. I like streets that are wide, sidewalks I can walk on, and roads that seem infinite to ride on.

I will miss certain aspects of Thailand, but when you really look at Thailand, it's pretty scruffy. I live just outside of the moat area in Chiang Mai. Ride down the soi and you see about 5 trash dumps, not one yard that doesn't have 2 foot high weeds, a dozen holes in the road, and that pure aroma of sewage. I kind of ignore all that, after all, it's expected here, but it will not disappoint me to be where things are a little more "manicured".

I'm pretty happy wherever I am, but I've spent my time here, enjoyed it, and now I'll move on. I don't understand why some people on TV seem so "protective" of Thailand. If it works for you, fine. If not, fine, but no reason to try and push your beliefs on others.

as you produce a blurb pushing your own beliefs!! lol

[MisterTee]

After three years here, I'm packing up and returning to the US. It's not so much that I dislike Thailand, it's that there are so many more options in the US. People talk about traveling around, but really, how many rice/corn fields and small villages or temples do you want to see? There is very little geographical diversity in Thailand. I plan a multi-state motorcycle tour of the Western region of the US. I won't need a visa, no 90 day reports, the police actually "police" (I find it amusing how many people on TV say they enjoy the "laxness" of the laws and then complain the police do nothing), and I find most people to be friendly and helpful. I like streets that are wide, sidewalks I can walk on, and roads that seem infinite to ride on.

I will miss certain aspects of Thailand, but when you really look at Thailand, it's pretty scruffy. I live just outside of the moat area in Chiang Mai. Ride down the soi and you see about 5 trash dumps, not one yard that doesn't have 2 foot high weeds, a dozen holes in the road, and that pure aroma of sewage. I kind of ignore all that, after all, it's expected here, but it will not disappoint me to be where things are a little more "manicured".

I'm pretty happy wherever I am, but I've spent my time here, enjoyed it, and now I'll move on. I don't understand why some people on TV seem so "protective" of Thailand. If it works for you, fine. If not, fine, but no reason to try and push your beliefs on others.

as you produce a blurb pushing your own beliefs!! lol

That's exactly what it is ... his own beliefs.

[AYJAYDEE]

After three years here, I'm packing up and returning to the US. It's not so much that I dislike Thailand, it's that there are so many more options in the US. People talk about traveling around, but really, how many rice/corn fields and small villages or temples do you want to see? There is very little geographical diversity in Thailand. I plan a multi-state motorcycle tour of the Western region of the US. I won't need a visa, no 90 day reports, the police actually "police" (I find it amusing how many people on TV say they enjoy the "laxness" of the laws and then complain the police do nothing), and I find most people to be friendly and helpful. I like streets that are wide, sidewalks I can walk on, and roads that seem infinite to ride on.

I will miss certain aspects of Thailand, but when you really look at Thailand, it's pretty scruffy. I live just outside of the moat area in Chiang Mai. Ride down the soi and you see about 5 trash dumps, not one yard that doesn't have 2 foot high weeds, a dozen holes in the road, and that pure aroma of sewage. I kind of ignore all that, after all, it's expected here, but it will not disappoint me to be where things are a little more "manicured".

I'm pretty happy wherever I am, but I've spent my time here, enjoyed it, and now I'll move on. I don't understand why some people on TV seem so "protective" of Thailand. If it works for you, fine. If not, fine, but no reason to try and push your beliefs on others.

as you produce a blurb pushing your own beliefs!! lol

That's exactly what it is ... his own beliefs.

and others are no more pushing theirs than he is