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Wife announces she doesn't want our son and leaves


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Posted

Monday night wife comes home from work hot and bothered starts agitating and finally throws a bowl of hot soup on me and points to our seven year old son and declares loudly and with no love or compassion to him that she doesn't want him anymore and leaves..Blocked me on her FB acct and won't return calls. Been together 10 years everything okay up till now. I am retired and since she started working I have pretty much been the caregiver of our son. Love him dearly...don't know what to do or what steps to take.. She was very clear she wants nothing to do with us. (Really ugly) and my son was and still is frightened and shattered...I am on a Thai Wife Visa which will need to be renewed next June and am hard pressed to come up with 25k to change back to retirement visa by then. Living on SS and a small pension.Will have to sell the land 1 1/2 rai but will need her to sign the chanote...what to do...? any ideas will be gratefully accepted.. Ain't this a kettle of fish

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Posted

I don't know much but I want to wish you the best. You sound like a good guy.

Others will be along, but I believe you have some rights to stay in country as the father. I hope so.

Posted

Are you the registered Father?

You'll get a visa if you are.

Borrow the money to get the retirement visa.

Jeez man, that's just shit.

You need money so your son can have more options in life.

Posted

A sad tale, but what's with the 25K to change to a retirement visa?

Can you demonstrate the 65K a month income or 800K in the bank?

As others have mentioned a visa based on your child might be an option.

Posted

A sad tale, but what's with the 25K to change to a retirement visa?

Suspect he means 25k $ (USD) to meet retirement financial requirements.

Posted

1. It seems to have been a fit of anger and only a couple of days have passed - expect it may resolve itself in a few more. I would not give up on 10 years or marriage over a blow-up. It seems the real anger was actually with something that happened at work actually. Thai are good a holding anger in but when it becomes too much it often is a soap opera outburst - and the loss of face makes it hard to makeup.

2. As mentioned - it is unclear what you would need to "change back to retirement". Do you currently have 400k available or 775k in bank? Remember you can use both bank account and income for retirement to meet the 800k requirement - at any rate that is some time in the future unless a divorce is done.

3. As said there are provisions for supporting a Thai child in worst case.

Posted

Thanks Lopburi ! Yes just have to come up with 12k US to do the combined to total 800k for retirement..wasn't sure if that was still in effect.. the guy at HH isn't clear some times ...Been here 11 years .( I do IMMI at Singkhon in HH) I have proof of pension income monthly (Over40k) .. it is all a bit overwhelming because it is totally out of the blue.. however if she has flown the coup for good.. it becomes an issue when renewal time comes as I will have to get to the 12k mark in bank acct again..to meet the retirement visa req which is why i was curious about the provisions regarding supporting a Thai child...am appreciative of the guidance and support from all at ThaiVisa.. you guys are a beacon in the wilderness and have always been a spot on source of clarity and suggestions.. am grateful for the clarity, opinions and info as still reeling from the bat to the head.. I intend to lay back as I can till a lil time passes ( your take on the soap opera is so true) but wanted to get my head started on a plan of action..the kid is still pretty distraught.. School semester break is coming up, so will feel a bit more relaxed to have him home.. Hope she doesn't go to school and snatch him between now and the 3rd.. I'm a wreck! Caught me completely off guard... thanks for the input

Posted

how c0uls your wife can do that to you and your son.,his her son too but i cant understand of thai people thinking that way ..i am a mother too i know i am not a perfect mother but jeez i cant do that to my own s0n she should love him as much as she can.

Posted

If finances are a problem you could as a last resort go to Suvannakhet and get a one year non immigrant visa based on marriage. Providing you have your original marriage certificate no proof of financial status will be needed.

Posted

If finances are a problem you could as a last resort go to Suvannakhet and get a one year non immigrant visa based on marriage. Providing you have your original marriage certificate no proof of financial status will be needed.

Was not aware of that... Do I go out and come in ? Have heard that since the Bangkok Bombing In and out visas are being discontinued.. at least the tourist ones..

Posted

It does sound like an 'outburst' which may have been building for some time, then exploded in one 'Soap Opera' outburst. Maybe (I hope) after a few days cooling off, she'll calm down and start thinking reasonably.

Good luck.

Posted

It does sound like an 'outburst' which may have been building for some time, then exploded in one 'Soap Opera' outburst. Maybe (I hope) after a few days cooling off, she'll calm down and start thinking reasonably.

Good luck.

Thanks I hope so too...

Posted

For child support visa you need 400k, I believe.

Wonder if proof of monthly pension income totaling well over that (over 12 months) will qualify rather than a lump sum in the bank for 3 months prior to renewal.. thanks want to explore all the options early..

Posted

I see it's been some time since you had an answer. I'm no expert but yes, I believe it's 40K per month. I believe there's also an option of doing a combination of deposit and income that totals 400k. Wait for one of the experts here.

Posted

I see it's been some time since you had an answer. I'm no expert but yes, I believe it's 40K per month. I believe there's also an option of doing a combination of deposit and income that totals 400k. Wait for one of the experts here.

Thanks Never Sure! Appreciate all the input and will explore/weigh options carefully

Posted

bowl of hot soup.... was it hot? do you have any burns?

Yeah it was hot ....swelling and like heavy sunburn.. took pictures already.....very visible in the photos.. but I am okay .. Hope the pics won't be necessary but am more concerned for future outbursts and IF the target is me or my son..so we will see how it plays out..may be the time to

"dat hang,ploy wat" (Cut the tail of the dog and leave it at the temple) --[end the relationship]-- and am hoping for it to be on amicable terms and not some 7pm Thai Drama...

Posted

I know a lady who walked away from 2 husbands ( with a single child involved each time) in almost an identical way ( excluding the soup). Both fathers really decent guys.

Posted

If finances are a problem you could as a last resort go to Suvannakhet and get a one year non immigrant visa based on marriage. Providing you have your original marriage certificate no proof of financial status will be needed.

Was not aware of that... Do I go out and come in ? Have heard that since the Bangkok Bombing In and out visas are being discontinued.. at least the tourist ones..

You cannot just do a quick in out. You have to go to the Thai consulate and pay 5000 baht for the visa . It is an overnight task so you need a hotel for 1 night.

There are several threads on Thai visa about this so you can do a search for the full details.

Posted

If finances are a problem you could as a last resort go to Suvannakhet and get a one year non immigrant visa based on marriage. Providing you have your original marriage certificate no proof of financial status will be needed.

Was not aware of that... Do I go out and come in ? Have heard that since the Bangkok Bombing In and out visas are being discontinued.. at least the tourist ones..

You cannot just do a quick in out. You have to go to the Thai consulate and pay 5000 baht for the visa . It is an overnight task so you need a hotel for 1 night.

There are several threads on Thai visa about this so you can do a search for the full details.

Thanks Denim! Found the links and Bookmarked em!

Posted

Sad to read this story. Feel for the young lad. ......Well, Books have been written on the subject of Thai women. Just contunue being the best Father you can be. Good luck.

Posted

Sad to read this story. Feel for the young lad. ......Well, Books have been written on the subject of Thai women. Just continue being the best Father you can be. Good luck.

Thanks for the support! Raised two sons in America..already and they are doing great... been here 3 times for visits.. I love this lil guy.. Will do the best I can for him :)

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