Are Women Supposed To Pay For Men In Thai Culture?

[austallia_1980]

My girl is a university student. We have gone out to eat numberous times with a variety of her friends, who are all 20-30 years old. Often it will be us and another couple. I would estimate it at around 20 double dates. Of these, there was only one time when the female did not pay for her boyfriend.

Today, I was sitting in BBQ Plaza and I decided to sit right by the cashier so I could observe. I watched 5 couples come and go under 30, and in every scenerio, the girl took the check and took all of the money out of her purse.

So, do Thai men ever pay for dinner for their girl friends?

[GuestHouse]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

[britmaveric]

Ms Brit normally handles my wallet when we are out, so she is paying, but with my dosh.

[austallia_1980]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

That is a possibility, but these are not married couples. I am not aware if Thai's 20-30 years old follow this practice. Anyone have any idea? I get a strong feeling that this is not the case.

[britmaveric]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

That is a possibility, but these are not married couples. I am not aware if Thai's 20-30 years old follow this practice. Anyone have any idea? I get a strong feeling that this is not the case.

We aren't married yet, and we fit that description.

[austallia_1980]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

That is a possibility, but these are not married couples. I am not aware if Thai's 20-30 years old follow this practice. Anyone have any idea? I get a strong feeling that this is not the case.

We aren't married yet, and we fit that description.

You speak good english for a thai male Brit.

[britmaveric]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

That is a possibility, but these are not married couples. I am not aware if Thai's 20-30 years old follow this practice. Anyone have any idea? I get a strong feeling that this is not the case.

We aren't married yet, and we fit that description.

You speak good english for a thai male Brit.

Faire play missed the Thai male bit, my apologies.

[gburns57au]

the females pay all the time.....it is the custom.....

They just use the mans money to do it...

It is the custom for the female to handle the finances when they are in committed relationships...the age you supplied would suggest this is the case with what you are seeing.

[meadish_sweetball]

When I was still dating, the girls I dated would not have me pay. I questioned this, always having heard that it was customary for the man to pay from "old asia hands". The answer I got was "I like to pay, I dont want to look cheap".

I think it depends on the girl... perhaps also seniority. Peers in age and close friends usually share their bills in my experience. So if you are younger or just slightly older than the girl, it may differ. Same thing if she is reasonably well off.

[Boo]

every thai couple I know has the women in charge of the money. When I met my husband he handed over all earnings to me to control spending. Said it was normal so who am I to argue with custom

[austallia_1980]

this is pretty interesting. so you have a 22 years old thai boy and thai girl. does he give her part of his paycheck each week from which she spends money and pays for their expenses entertainment? assume that they are not living together?

is this unique to Thailand?

I am pretty sure that in India and Korea that the man handles the money.

[Matt1036]

I just asked the wife about this. She says it is common in Thai family (husband and wife) and when "pooying and poochai have plan about future together" for the female to handle the money but that it is not always the case - depends on the couple. She says first dates and early in the relationship the male would pay - same as in western culture. I'm guessing it marks a milestone in the relationship when the boy hands over to the girl - a signal to all others that they are serious perhaps.

[Unknown]

My girl is a university student. We have gone out to eat numberous times with a variety of her friends, who are all 20-30 years old. Often it will be us and another couple. I would estimate it at around 20 double dates. Of these, there was only one time when the female did not pay for her boyfriend.

Today, I was sitting in BBQ Plaza and I decided to sit right by the cashier so I could observe. I watched 5 couples come and go under 30, and in every scenerio, the girl took the check and took all of the money out of her purse.

So, do Thai men ever pay for dinner for their girl friends?

You missed part of the story, the girl is 'controlling' the money of the boyfriend, he gives her everything and she manages it...

[skippybangkok]

Love it, feels like being Royalty , having some one to handle the mundane task of settling the bills after a meal or when buying cloths. I think it earns ( ?? ) a little more respect for a couple when out and about as there are plenty of sugar daddy's buying their short term crumpets stuff in the stores, so if you have the oppostite arrangement, it comes across ( i think ) as a more"stable and serious couple".

Stupid example, but went to Spazzo tonight ( rare event ) and there were a few cumpets with their sugar daddies, which paid and went in before us. Then my Mrs. pulled out the credit card and paid for us both, and we got a very curtious wai from the cashier / entry lady.

I think it sends a clear message about the relationship. As some other said, most wives handle the day to day payment of stuff here.

[Unknown]

As some other said, most wives handle the day to day payment of stuff here.

Shall we say all?

Just for the farangs who are not prepared...

Edited October 6, 2006 by Unknown

[kayo]

yeah.. in a way. Often the man hands over his paycheck to his wife (so that HE doesn't risk blowing it all on the p1ss.) and therefore it logically indicatess that she takes care of household finances.

[bkkandrew]

Love it, feels like being Royalty , having some one to handle the mundane task of settling the bills after a meal or when buying cloths. I think it earns ( ?? ) a little more respect for a couple when out and about as there are plenty of sugar daddy's buying their short term crumpets stuff in the stores, so if you have the oppostite arrangement, it comes across ( i think ) as a more"stable and serious couple".

Stupid example, but went to Spazzo tonight ( rare event ) and there were a few cumpets with their sugar daddies, which paid and went in before us. Then my Mrs. pulled out the credit card and paid for us both, and we got a very curtious wai from the cashier / entry lady.

I think it sends a clear message about the relationship. As some other said, most wives handle the day to day payment of stuff here.

100%

Just a Thai way of saying "I am stable and resident". Very effective in attaining a big face. The opposite (ferrang handing out dosh after meal/drinks) is a major loss of face to Thai PY

[terry57]

yeah.. in a way. Often the man hands over his paycheck to his wife (so that HE doesn't risk blowing it all on the p1ss.) and therefore it logically indicatess that she takes care of household finances.

you dont drink much do you kayo .?

you wouldn't be smiling like that as you'd have a blinking hangover my clowning friend.

anyway,

where did you buy those top teeth, off a horse maybe ?

cheers mate.

[skippybangkok]

Well, lets put another spin on it... I never fill the petrol tank, or have to shop for food, pay for meals, drinks, never settle any bills, just browse through the shops and point to the shirt or pants I like etc....... - it has its merrits

Have not got her feeding grapes to me on the sofa yet, but working on that one ! (Kidding).

I see it every where we go, it catches people by surprise as they expect the falang to be pulling out the wallet. Its a bit of fun too, cause you can kinda see the cashiers looking slightly confused trying to figure this one out.

Would not be comfortable is I was a kept man, and as with most couples, I am the major bread winner at home ( otherwise would feel guilty as hel_l )

Edited October 7, 2006 by skippybangkok

[Rajah]

I´ve been told, Thai gf pay, bacause they want to show, that they aren't hookers. And if I think about my expreriences in the past - it always came down to that. So beware, if you have to invite a new gf all the time...

[Neeranam]

I´ve been told, Thai gf pay, bacause they want to show, that they aren't hookers. And if I think about my expreriences in the past - it always came down to that. So beware, if you have to invite a new gf all the time...

But... many hookers also pay - it's called the long-term investment plan.

The bar girl pays for everthing then after a few days/weeks/months/even years hits the guy for the jackpot.

Mrs Neeranam pays for all the household things but when outside, I pay for everything.

Many Thai spouses pay for bills and things in restaurants because the farang half doesn't know how to.

I have a couple of friends who couldn't go anywhere without their wives as they can't speak a word of the language.

[Rajah]

But... many hookers also pay - it's called the long-term investment plan.

The bar girl pays for everthing then after a few days/weeks/months/even years hits the guy for the jackpot.

Yeah, I heard about this 5-year-plan too. Hard to believe, but still true.

[Heng]

We're both Thai and sometimes she pays, but more often than not I pay. We keep our real estate and fixed account assets for all items and revenue after getting married separate/equal though, that is all items are held independent of the other with no joint accounts.

Like many societies... it all depends.

[Donz]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

Its actually good because I love to spend money and we would be broke if I was handling the finances

[LaoPo]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

LaoPo

[Old Croc]

Perhaps the reason can be found in my experience of today.

I went to the bank with my wife this morning to draw a wad of cash (all the real spending here in Italy is cash).

Signed on the line, watched the teller count the money and then promptly hand it to my wife.

It least he saved having to do the handover myself.

That is a possibility, but these are not married couples. I am not aware if Thai's 20-30 years old follow this practice. Anyone have any idea? I get a strong feeling that this is not the case.

We aren't married yet, and we fit that description.

You speak good english for a thai male Brit.

Faire play missed the Thai male bit, my apologies.

His english isn't that good, he never learn't how to spell "fair"

[Donz]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

LaoPo

whats wrong with that, my money is her money. her money is my money

[Unknown]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

LaoPo

whats wrong with that?

The allowance part...

[Donz]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

LaoPo

whats wrong with that?

The allowance part...

it actaully works out in my favour believe it or not.

[Unknown]

Yeah my gf handles all our money (most of its hers) I get an allowance and she saves the rest for my trips to thailand and she pays for food, booze, eating out and groceries.

LaoPo

whats wrong with that?

The allowance part...

it actually works out in my favour believe it or not.

Was not a critic, Donz, not at all...