Norwich?

The city in question must have a rather small expat community. I'm not trying to point a finger at them in particular. Don't waste your time asking again.

Na couldn't be Naarwich.

I'm from Naarwich it's a right nice city boi.

Makes no sense. Was your wife making a big face or rolling her eyes at them? That would do it and she's deserve it.

My guess is your Farang wife didn't get the looks or leers she expected,and got a bit bored or peeved!

So you and the farang wife went into a bar and messed with the status quo of the local expats.

Surprised they did not hang you from the nearest tree.

At every bar of the type you describe that I have visited in Isaan, I have said "Hello" and have been welcomed to join the regulars.

Why did you both not talk to them? That would be strange behaviour on your part and may have caused quizzical glances.

Having a white woman with you would not have caused any problems.

Sent from my LG-H324 using Tapatalk

The only time I have seen "several of the farang men spent the evening glaring angrily in my wife's direction" was when we accidentally stumbled into a religious gathering and my Mrs was showing a bit of cleavage.

We were just quietly sitting in the corner minding our own business. No inappropriate behaviour or judging involved.

Minding your own business just enough to notice what everyone else was doing it seems.

Maybe they were surprised to see your wife at the table instead of your umbrella.

The probable reason these guys had issue with your wife was there baggage/history with the women they left back at home plus the generalisation from western women that all young asian women are only with older white men for one reason only.

My sister, she has a doctorate of education and a very high paying job on meeting my current TGF who happened to be taking leave to study Business English in AU who also happens to be a manger with a Masters Degree and about 25 years younger than me asked her why she wanted to live in Australia.... Just goes to show you female insecurities are much stronger than good sense, the TGF answered she did not want to live in Australia and was only here for a short time to study, i had worded my sister up prior to introducing them.

Your experience says something not only about those guys but about your wife too....really isn't hard to ignore whats going on around.

They're probably conditioned to assume all western women are thinking the pits about em. Wouldn't read much more into that.

Interesting that some assume my wife must be the one at fault somehow. She's neither judgemental or interested in the attention of men old enough to be her father. But these comments do give an insight into the kind of assumptions these guys might have been making about her.

As for why didn't we talk to them - why should we? We were just trying to eat our dinner and have a quiet drink.

Come on now gentlemen, it is only a function of human nature and sociably acceptable norms.

If you appear different when entering a part of society where your appearance is going to make you stand out, then for sure you will create interest.

Unless some effort is made to break down the barrier, you will feel that you are being observed, and for sure you will be.

If you had made some effort to conform to that group, made some approach to curtail what would have appeared a threat to their normality and for sure there is probably very little difference in reality, then you will most certainly be viewed "as a threat" and treated accordingly.

There we are back to human nature alone.

You might also ask yourself why, when obviously you were creating this aurora, that you did not feel or take the chance to seize upon it and enjoy their company

We were eating food and drinking beer, in an establishment based on those things. The other couples present were doing exactly the same thing. In what way were we not conforming? How could we have done so?

Communication, verbal and otherwise.

Integration, talking with them to find out about them.

Swap Facebook ids ( or whatever they are called as I never use it)

Don't misunderstand me, I have observed the same when in UK with my Japanese wife, peoples pre conceived ideas are very strong emotions

The other people present were sitting in couples, as we were, and making no effort to socialise with other tables. But somehow by acting in the same way we were not conforming?

Are you really suggesting we should have interrupted a number of couples eating their dinner and asked for their contact details in order to seem less of a threat?

You come off as someone with a chip on their shoulder and an agenda. We are only getting one side of the story but you seem to resent people suggesting it might be you and not the other guys. I think there is a least a 50-50 chance you either misinterpreted or have misrepresented what went on.

What agenda do you perceive me to have?

We just wanted to have a quiet meal and a couple of beers without being stared at.

Judging from your behavior on TVF, it is hard for me to accept what you say at face value. I suspect your attitude comes through in person as well as it does in print.

I'm not sure how I would have displayed an attitude whilst quietly sharing a meal with my wife.

OP sounds like bias confirmation in full effect.

I certainly never came across anything like that when with Western partners here. And we spent 6 months in Isaan with one.

Mountain out of a mole hill thread.

Chips on shoulders about western women ? Or they've just not seen a western man married to a western woman before and seemingly happy?

OB

You have the annoying habit of enjoying being annoying.....Maybe you carry that with you....

On the board you come off as prissy, priggish, judgemental, annoying, and pious.....It' a possible this is what you are in person....

It is also simply possible while you entered both you and your wife were sweeping (noticing) the room with your glances you could have made others curious or uncomfortable.... Women always notice/size up each other & it's noticed/communicated both ways....Possibly would have gone unoticed in a larger city but where you were you were the anomaly....Odds are it was a local watering hole with an established crowd - "their" territory so to speak.....Has happened before.....

The fact you decided to leave says more about you than them......If you had ignored them everyone probably would have settled back in to enjoy their meal.....But THEY made YOU feel out of place so YOU left .....Paranoia?

Unless you were doing something to draw attention to yourselves (loud/smoking/constantly looking around) you should have concentrated on you and your wife and enjoyed your evening & the heck with everyone else.....

Nonsense post. Glaring angrily? Nah... Don't believe you

Pretty ironic use of the word 'judgemental' there, considering the way you're roundly passing judgement on what you see as my flaws.

As it happens, the place was empty when we arrived, and as I've said we were simply minding our own business and sitting in a quiet corner eating and drinking by the time the other customers turned up. My wife isn't the type to 'size up' other women - despite what you seem to think, this isn't a universal female trait. To be fair to them, the other women present didn't seem at all interested in her, either. It was the men they were with giving her the stink eye.

You have the annoying habit of enjoying being annoying.....Maybe you carry that with you....

On the board you come off as prissy, priggish, judgemental, annoying, and pious.....It' a possible this is what you are in person....

It is also simply possible while you entered both you and your wife were sweeping (noticing) the room with your glances you could have made others curious or uncomfortable.... Women always notice/size up each other & it's noticed/communicated both ways....Possibly would have gone unoticed in a larger city but where you were you were the anomaly....Odds are it was a local watering hole with an established crowd - "their" territory so to speak.....Has happened before.....

The fact you decided to leave says more about you than them......If you had ignored them everyone probably would have settled back in to enjoy their meal.....But THEY made YOU feel out of place so YOU left .....Paranoia?

Unless you were doing something to draw attention to yourselves (loud/smoking/constantly looking around) you should have concentrated on you and your wife and enjoyed your evening & the heck with everyone else.....

+1

Pretty ironic use of the word 'judgemental' there, considering the way you're roundly passing judgement on what you see as my flaws.

As it happens, the place was empty when we arrived, and as I've said we were simply minding our own business and sitting in a quiet corner eating and drinking by the time the other customers turned up. My wife isn't the type to 'size up' other women - despite what you seem to think, this isn't a universal female trait. To be fair to them, the other women present didn't seem at all interested in her, either. It was the men they were with giving her the stink eye.

Well then SB - maybe you're onto something then ..... Maybe they judged her by the company she kept.....

This sounds so odd that I doubt that it actually happened.

Why would it?

Speaking as a farang woman --- it is not odd at all. Happens a lot here and not limited to any particular location.

SoiBiker:

Please put the unfortunate rudeness of the restaurant goers in the rear view mirror.

What I'm dying to hear though are your thoughts on Cold Play's new Bollywood video.

SoiBiker:

Please put the rudeness of the restaurant goers in the rear view mirror.

What I'm dying to hear are your thoughts on Cold Play's new Bollywood video.

I've managed to successfully avoid Coldplay for some time now, and I'm afraid I'd like to keep it that way, so I haven't seen the video in question.

This sounds so odd that I doubt that it actually happened.

Why would it?

Speaking as a farang woman --- it is not odd at all. Happens a lot here and not limited to any particular location.

Thanks for sharing that - apparently many would like to think I'm making the whole thing up, so it's nice to have confirmation that it happens.