Do you pay her a salary? (I do.)

[theguyfromanotherforum]

I pay myself a salary every month for living in a third world country.

[SoiBiker]

I pay myself for sex. The money comes in handy, but I still feel dirty afterwards.

[BritManToo]

I pay myself for sex. The money comes in handy, but I still feel dirty afterwards.

I guess you have very few options, with a western wife, bad luck.

[SoiBiker]

I pay myself for sex. The money comes in handy, but I still feel dirty afterwards.

I guess you have very few options, with a western wife, bad luck.

Actually, we have a very active sex life. The only limitation is how often she can afford me.

[sawadee1947]

make love with you when YOU want

how you handle this in your country?

1) What would be the point in having a woman that didn't make love when you wanted?

2) I handle it by myself.

Other stuff on your list not required, I'm liberated, I can't do it better myself.

Oh, no problem. You are free to buy a prostitute whenever you want. No ties attached. Same in UK but there more expensive. Therefore you are here and not there. Enjoy if you can.....

[dotpoom]

I pay her a salary every month, same as a job would pay her, because I love her company and she is the only friend I have in Thailand. I didn't come here to be sitting on my own all day (I don't drink or go to bars). Every 5 or 6 weeks we pack up the car and hit the road for a 4 or 5 day holiday somewhere, couldn'r do that if she was working. When we need our own space she gets a bit of a job for about 2 months.

[ozyjon]

Well, in conservative German families it is kind of normal to give the woman

allowance money to keep up with the needs and the budget of the household.

Not being personal but many westerners come to Asia and bring their western

culture with them, then many problems arise, whatever you give, never enough.

You are now in Asia, think like an Asian.

[mgjackson69]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

[sawadee1947]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

maybe you are incapable in any relationship....

I can't see any difference between an interracial marriage (legally and acknowledged by your home country) and a western one. It's all about trust, something you can't spell even.

I'm waiting for your reply.

BTW who are you then? The fool or the liar?

[theguyfromanotherforum]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

maybe you are incapable in any relationship....

I can't see any difference between an interracial marriage (legally and acknowledged by your home country) and a western one. It's all about trust, something you can't spell even.

I'm waiting for your reply.

BTW who are you then? The fool or the liar?

I have this issue with trust.

Trust is based on present and it can change. Actually, people's feelings change all the time. If divorce in the west is 50% by what dream math are odds going to be better between interracial relationships where the other half doesn't even speak the language. ROFL.

Based on that fact I will not be paying anyone a "salary" or a stipend. Another thing. Most people who pay for a relationship expect some kind of an "understanding" and "acknowledgement" from online forums (another lol). Yet, when I mention that my wife put 1 million of her own money towards sinsod and another 400k in my bank account for a marriage visa they call me either a liar or a scammer (yes, another lol).

My wife is not rich, but yes... she did all this for me and more... simply because she wanted me to be with her. If we move to Canada, I will do the same for her. That's what I think is trust. Not paying someone every month to be with you? Seriously, who are you people kidding? Maybe most can get away with this lie on a Thai forum simply because.... well... other people do it too. Post this on any forum in your own country and people will call it what it is - a prostitution.

You people crack me up.

[thaihome]

Appears that after some 9 pages that at least half the posts are due to a too literal interpretation of the word "salary". It seems that in most cases this "salary" is in fact just spending money for the partner in cases when only one person has an income.

Also it appears that some feel that in a relationship that both people should have their own income otherwise it is an "old fashion" relationship or a "transactional" one. This is a rather unfortunate generalization (seems to happen a lot here). Many couples, for a variety of personal reasons, choose to have one partner not work or otherwise not contribute revenue to the relationship. Why do so many here feel the need to make a derogatory judgement of that choice? Again, as with so many posts, it says so much about the poster and their view of relationships and possibly their lack of success in them.

TH

[mgjackson69]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

maybe you are incapable in any relationship....

I can't see any difference between an interracial marriage (legally and acknowledged by your home country) and a western one. It's all about trust, something you can't spell even.

I'm waiting for your reply.

BTW who are you then? The fool or the liar?

First, where is the mis-spelling?

Secondly, I am neither the fool or the liar.

When I was married to my first wife in USA, we kept separate bank accounts, and divided up the bills according to 1) who they belonged to, 2) by percentage of income. I actually took on a greater percentage of the bills than the incomes dictated; it worked out fine.

Money was never a problem with that arrangement. We both had what we needed and never had to argue about financials.

I provide my Thai wife more than enough money to run the household and have some discretionary money to spend as she wants. As I am responsible for the long-term financial well-being of the household, it is on me to manage the rest of my money. As I suspect many others have, I have other financial obligations, such as a son in University, some financial investments in USA, etc.

Trust is one thing, being pragmatic about different people's fiscal responsibility is another.

Not that it is any of your business, but my Thai wife and I have been together and very happy for 10 years +. It did not take long to get the financials settled; i e that it was not going to be an open checkbook. We have regular discussions about financial needs ("need" vs "want" took a bit of time to settle) and all is well.

I will put it back to you...would you give any Thai lady open access to all of your income?

[thaihome]

...

I will put it back to you...would you give any Thai lady open access to all of your income?

And if, heaven forbid, you were to keel over dead you have provided some means for your wife to survive for what could be an extended wait for her inheritance to show up?

My wife has full access to my US account and knows how to get money to Thailand just for that reason. It would never occur to her to use her access for any other reason.

As a side note, she has an account in her name that is our agreed savings account for Thailand. For a variety of reasons the balance has grown to over 4 million baht and we have decided to live off that for a while. The process now is she transfers money to my account each month and I transfer her spending money (she refers to it as her "salary ") each week.

Generalization about a group of people is rarely accurate and is usually highly subjective based on that person's limited experience with the group being generalized about.

TH

[mgjackson69]

...

I will put it back to you...would you give any Thai lady open access to all of your income?

And if, heaven forbid, you were to keel over dead you have provided some means for your wife to survive for what could be an extended wait for her inheritance to show up?

My wife has full access to my US account and knows how to get money to Thailand just for that reason. It would never occur to her to use her access for any other reason.

As a side note, she has an account in her name that is our agreed savings account for Thailand. For a variety of reasons the balance has grown to over 4 million baht and we have decided to live off that for a while. The process now is she transfers money to my account each month and I transfer her spending money (she refers to it as her "salary ") each week.

Generalization about a group of people is rarely accurate and is usually highly subjective based on that person's limited experience with the group being generalized about.

TH

I have made arrangements for my wife, in the event that I pass before her.

As strange as it may sound, my ex-wife and my son (with her) are co-executors of my estate in USA.

We overcame our differences long ago, and are still good friends. I trust her implicitly to carry out my wishes regarding my USA financials.

It is not a matter of distrust with my current wife...rather a pragmatic view of how various people and cultures view money.

As always, it is difficult to generalize across large groups of people, but in general, people who have never been around "money" (I am not rich by any means, but I manage my money well and have a good salary) do not have the first clue about how to use money to make money. I include my current wife in that category.

If I was to hand her some large amount of money today, and tell her that it had to last for the rest of her life, I can guarantee that most of it would be gone in short order...She is too jai dee for her own good, and has a bunch of family that knows that.

I do not keep tight rein on the purse strings because I am khee niouw or a hardass.

In the interest of full disclosure, my wife does have some access to my USA accounts as well. She also knows, and has honored for 10 years now, that the access is by request and permission only. In an extreme emergency she know she can access the funds, but will endure an uncomfortable conversation with me afterwards..."nephew crashed his motorbike and broke his arm" does not constitute an emergency for me...he has plenty of other family.

So in a pinch, she is not stuck begging for food or anything like that.

Right now in Thailand we have two houses free and clear, a bunch of farmland free and clean, an 8 unit apartment free and clear, one truck and a couple of motorbikes free and clear. Monthly bills are one truck payment, light bill, water bill, internet bill, groceries.

Nobody is impoverished.

[BritManToo]

As always, it is difficult to generalize across large groups of people, but in general, people who have never been around "money" (I am not rich by any means, but I manage my money well and have a good salary) do not have the first clue about how to use money to make money. I include my current wife in that category.

Not knowing how to use money to make money, you can include me in that group, along with most of the world population.

I can make stacks of cash working for other people, but I've never been able to use money to make money in my life.

Thank god for company pensions, they hand it out every month, and I can spend it, no thought required.

If I was to hand her some large amount of money today, and tell her that it had to last for the rest of her life, I can guarantee that most of it would be gone in short order...She is too jai dee for her own good, and has a bunch of family that knows that.

I do not keep tight rein on the purse strings because I am khee niouw or a hardass.

Jai dee and Kee neeow

Best to keep Thai hooker talk out of your posts, it's a bit of a give away.

Rule number 1 in Thailand, never repeat any Thai words you hear in a hooker bar.

[SoiBiker]

Appears that after some 9 pages that at least half the posts are due to a too literal interpretation of the word "salary". It seems that in most cases this "salary" is in fact just spending money for the partner in cases when only one person has an income.

Also it appears that some feel that in a relationship that both people should have their own income otherwise it is an "old fashion" relationship or a "transactional" one. This is a rather unfortunate generalization (seems to happen a lot here). Many couples, for a variety of personal reasons, choose to have one partner not work or otherwise not contribute revenue to the relationship. Why do so many here feel the need to make a derogatory judgement of that choice? Again, as with so many posts, it says so much about the poster and their view of relationships and possibly their lack of success in them.

TH

I used the word transactional for specific reasons. I'm not talking about just any relationship where one partner supports the other - obviously that happens all the time and is a very normal thing. A transaction, on the other hand, implies that money is changing hands in return for goods or services rendered. If one partner is only providing those services on condition that the salary is paid, then that's a very different kind of relationship indeed.

[mgjackson69]

As always, it is difficult to generalize across large groups of people, but in general, people who have never been around "money" (I am not rich by any means, but I manage my money well and have a good salary) do not have the first clue about how to use money to make money. I include my current wife in that category.

Not knowing how to use money to make money, you can include me in that group, along with most of the world population.

I can make stacks of cash working for other people, but I've never been able to use money to make money in my life.

Thank god for company pensions, they hand it out every month, and I can spend it, no thought required.

If I was to hand her some large amount of money today, and tell her that it had to last for the rest of her life, I can guarantee that most of it would be gone in short order...She is too jai dee for her own good, and has a bunch of family that knows that.

I do not keep tight rein on the purse strings because I am khee niouw or a hardass.

Jai dee and Kee neeow

Best to keep Thai hooker talk out of your posts, it's a bit of a give away.

Rule number 1 in Thailand, never repeat any Thai words you hear in a hooker bar.

Jai dee and Khee Niouw are not limited to "hooker talk".

It may be that some of us (myself included) first heard those terms in a bar situation....live and learn.

I hear you about the financial management. I am no wizard, but I do the best I can with the resources I have. Mostly that means conservative investments with what I have to spare, keeping available cash on hand.

Like yourself, I have been a "wage slave" all of my life. Pension has never been a reality in my industry; most USA companies did away with that a long time ago (I cashed in the "pension" that i had with a large US computer company a few years ago...it amounted to 14xxx before taxes). But, I have had some examples in my family about what to do and what not to do regarding money and investments. Thus, I have been able to make some modest investments of my own. Also, I have been a W2 (USA taxation speak) wage earner since age 13, and for the past 27 years have earned a good income working in telecommunications. Since the conception of the 401k retirement program, I have contributed 10% of my salary, so things are looking pretty positive for me.

Naysayers notwithstanding, between my US Social Security and 401k, if I can keep slaving until age 67 I will make about the same monthly as I am making now. That will not be a bad income for drinking beer and watching the rice grow.

[BritManToo]

Jai dee and Khee Niouw are not limited to "hooker talk".

Hookers and those who associate with hookers. Never heard any other Thai national use those words, ever.

And I used to live in a 'Thai only' community.

Add ting tong, and salop salie for the full set.

[mgjackson69]

Jai dee and Khee Niouw are not limited to "hooker talk".

Hookers and those who associate with hookers. Never heard any other Thai national use those words, ever.

And I used to live in a 'Thai only' community.

Add ting tong, and salop salie for the full set.

Think what you want.

I am comfortable knowing you are wrong.

You can have the last word, if it validates your position.

[RandolphGB]

Jai dee and Khee Niouw are not limited to "hooker talk".

Hookers and those who associate with hookers. Never heard any other Thai national use those words, ever.

And I used to live in a 'Thai only' community.

Add ting tong, and salop salie for the full set.

Khee Niouw is not a hooker word. Nor is ting tong. Any young Thais will know these words. They're just slang.

[balo]

I am 71, my wife is 40, we have been together eights years so far so good

I openly discuss our relationship is a business arrangement in which we have both found great love

Of course I give her money each month and help her family, she stopped work because I asked her to

This is wife no four and I have never been more loved or looked after, when I die she will get it all, she wanted a new Mini, and I replied did she really want to spend her future money and the answer was no!!

We all work it in different ways but some financial generosity helps greatly

Sorry to be cynical but maybe she's just waiting for you to die . Maybe better to give her the Mini so she dont have to wait too long.

[uthaithanirules]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

maybe you are incapable in any relationship....

I can't see any difference between an interracial marriage (legally and acknowledged by your home country) and a western one. It's all about trust, something you can't spell even.

I'm waiting for your reply.

BTW who are you then? The fool or the liar?

I have this issue with trust.

Trust is based on present and it can change. Actually, people's feelings change all the time. If divorce in the west is 50% by what dream math are odds going to be better between interracial relationships where the other half doesn't even speak the language. ROFL.

Based on that fact I will not be paying anyone a "salary" or a stipend. Another thing. Most people who pay for a relationship expect some kind of an "understanding" and "acknowledgement" from online forums (another lol). Yet, when I mention that my wife put 1 million of her own money towards sinsod and another 400k in my bank account for a marriage visa they call me either a liar or a scammer (yes, another lol).

My wife is not rich, but yes... she did all this for me and more... simply because she wanted me to be with her. If we move to Canada, I will do the same for her. That's what I think is trust. Not paying someone every month to be with you? Seriously, who are you people kidding? Maybe most can get away with this lie on a Thai forum simply because.... well... other people do it too. Post this on any forum in your own country and people will call it what it is - a prostitution.

You people crack me up.

If mine tried to get a job, even 15 kms away away from home in the centre of town, the MIL is unable to do anything as she has to look after the kids....all for the grand total of 10,000baht a month which would be your average pay for most jobs in Thailand, and that would a mundane 50 or so hours a week.

If she stays near home, both her and the MIL through various enterprises, come close to 10,000 a month anyway, and all for probably 30 hrs a week between them.

That is, she comes out better off if she doesnt actually get a regular job. And of course she is with her children the whole time.

This inference if I give her money on top of that, that she is a prostitute, it's really kind of disgusting on your part and others that say that.

I wonder what the real reason for you trying to enforce that belief is. Bitter and mean spirited for some reason

[fey]

dont care what you do with your life, but...

your not a man in my book if your paying for it. thats different then helping out financially. you need to be man enough to know the difference.

if shes sticking around purely for the cash you gots to accept it for what it is.

not something i likes to display at restaurants or in front of other men or be proud off during those times its happened to me.

but you does whats you gots to do.

im going to make me a sammich now.

[uthaithanirules]

your not a man in my book if your paying for it.

if shes sticking around purely for the cash you gots to accept it for what it is

To me that just sounds like a way of rationalizing being a cheapskate.

Especially in situations where kids are involved, and the guy is earning over ten times what she could

[theguyfromanotherforum]

Any of you who say you are giving your Thai wife unfettered access to all of your bank accounts are a) fools or liars.

maybe you are incapable in any relationship....

I can't see any difference between an interracial marriage (legally and acknowledged by your home country) and a western one. It's all about trust, something you can't spell even.

I'm waiting for your reply.

BTW who are you then? The fool or the liar?

I have this issue with trust.

Trust is based on present and it can change. Actually, people's feelings change all the time. If divorce in the west is 50% by what dream math are odds going to be better between interracial relationships where the other half doesn't even speak the language. ROFL.

Based on that fact I will not be paying anyone a "salary" or a stipend. Another thing. Most people who pay for a relationship expect some kind of an "understanding" and "acknowledgement" from online forums (another lol). Yet, when I mention that my wife put 1 million of her own money towards sinsod and another 400k in my bank account for a marriage visa they call me either a liar or a scammer (yes, another lol).

My wife is not rich, but yes... she did all this for me and more... simply because she wanted me to be with her. If we move to Canada, I will do the same for her. That's what I think is trust. Not paying someone every month to be with you? Seriously, who are you people kidding? Maybe most can get away with this lie on a Thai forum simply because.... well... other people do it too. Post this on any forum in your own country and people will call it what it is - a prostitution.

You people crack me up.

If mine tried to get a job, even 15 kms away away from home in the centre of town, the MIL is unable to do anything as she has to look after the kids....all for the grand total of 10,000baht a month which would be your average pay for most jobs in Thailand, and that would a mundane 50 or so hours a week.

If she stays near home, both her and the MIL through various enterprises, come close to 10,000 a month anyway, and all for probably 30 hrs a week between them.

That is, she comes out better off if she doesnt actually get a regular job. And of course she is with her children the whole time.

This inference if I give her money on top of that, that she is a prostitute, it's really kind of disgusting on your part and others that say that.

I wonder what the real reason for you trying to enforce that belief is. Bitter and mean spirited for some reason

Come on. Isn't Thailand like less than 1% unemployment? Is she in the statistics now counted as "employed".

The funniest thing is how convincing you all sound.

I grew up in Yugoslavia where the average salary was less than US$200. I have never seen a woman in my country prostitute herself to a foreigner for $300 a month. They all worked... but for some reason Thai women are so convincing about this money extraction business.

Yes, they are all nice women.

Actually, lazy comes to mind.

[BritManToo]

I grew up in Yugoslavia where the average salary was less than US$200. I have never seen a woman in my country prostitute herself to a foreigner for $300 a month. They all worked... but for some reason Thai women are so convincing about this money extraction business.

You're so right, and all these guys claiming theirs are different, you gotta laugh.

You pay them and they have sex with you, you stop paying them and they have sex with someone else.

Not really much to discuss. Apart from how deluded can a poster appear to be.

[mgjackson69]

dont care what you do with your life, but...

your not a man in my book if your paying for it. thats different then helping out financially. you need to be man enough to know the difference.

if shes sticking around purely for the cash you gots to accept it for what it is.

not something i likes to display at restaurants or in front of other men or be proud off during those times its happened to me.

but you does whats you gots to do.

im going to make me a sammich now.

You always "pay for it".

Paying a bar girl for short time, or long time, or marrying someone....you are still paying for it.

If you add it up, the bar girls are cheaper than a wife.

Go ahead and lie to yourself...you think your Western wife is free?

[Agent Sumo]

I pay her a salary every month, same as a job would pay her, because I love her company and she is the only friend I have in Thailand. I didn't come here to be sitting on my own all day (I don't drink or go to bars). Every 5 or 6 weeks we pack up the car and hit the road for a 4 or 5 day holiday somewhere, couldn'r do that if she was working. When we need our own space she gets a bit of a job for about 2 months.

That's tragic. You're paying someone to be your friend?? Can't you go out and meet people?

I am 71, my wife is 40, we have been together eights years so far so good

I openly discuss our relationship is a business arrangement in which we have both found great love

Of course I give her money each month and help her family, she stopped work because I asked her to

This is wife no four and I have never been more loved or looked after, when I die she will get it all, she wanted a new Mini, and I replied did she really want to spend her future money and the answer was no!!

We all work it in different ways but some financial generosity helps greatly

Great love? Would that love withstand an indefinite interruption in the flow of money from you to her?

[uthaithanirules]

Come on. Isn't Thailand like less than 1% unemployment? Is she in the statistics now counted as "employed".

The funniest thing is how convincing you all sound.

I grew up in Yugoslavia where the average salary was less than US$200. I have never seen a woman in my country prostitute herself to a foreigner for $300 a month. They all worked... but for some reason Thai women are so convincing about this money extraction business.

Yes, they are all nice women.

Actually, lazy comes to mind.

Are you being serious?

You think there arent any women from the slav states that hook up with foreigners for money?

[BritManToo]

This topic is terrible, I'm having to side with all the posters I usually fight against!